I sit by my phone frowning as I watch the FaceTime screen ring for a bit, before showing me that the call wasn't answered. Looks like Ruel is busy, yet again. It's not that I'm mad at him for not picking up, he has a job to do that takes up countless hours of his time, and I'm proud of the dedication he has when it comes to his career. I'm just upset that lately it seems like we never talk, he calls when I'm asleep or working, or I call when he's asleep or working. It just seems like nothing is working for us, but I can't not be with him, he's my whole world. I finally clear my thoughts and stand up from my bed, making my way to my bathroom so I can have a relaxing shower, and hopefully come out to see a message from Ruel.
I make my way out of the bathroom in my favorite hoodie that I took from Ruel, jumping onto my bed to check my phone notifs, feeling my heart flutter at the text from "bubs <3". I immediately click it, typing down a response as fast as I can, hoping he's not busy or asleep yet. Luck is finally on my side when I get a response, mere seconds after I had sent mine.
Baby I'm so sorry, I would've answered but I was on stage It's okay bubs, how was the concert? I know how much you love Amsterdam :) It was amazing! They were so into everything and I swear they knew lyrics to unreleased songs which was kinda wild.. wish u were here tho I'm happy for you baby!! You know how your fans are, they find everything out lmao Are you okay? You kinda ignored the last thing I said I'm okay, sorry I just didn't want to reply to it and get all emotional on you lol
I let out a shaky breath when I hit send, already feeling my built up emotions get ready to spill over, I just miss him so much. I see him typing for a couple of seconds, before the little bubble disappears, instantly replaced by my screen lighting up with an incoming FaceTime call. I hesitantly answer, making sure the hood on Ruels hoodie is covering my face a little, knowing it's already getting splotchy from being so emotional. I watch as the screen lights up, with my beautiful boyfriend laying on his bed in the back of the bus, staring at me silently.
"Hey love, wanna remove that hood for me? I want to see that beautiful face of yours-" he quietly whispers out, not wanting to overwhelm me. He can read me like a book, which is how he can always tell when something's wrong. I let out a quiet sigh, pulling the hood back, looking away from the phone so that I don't have to see the look on his face. I hear him sigh out once he takes in my under eye bags, splotchy red face, and shiny eyes. He takes in a deep breath before asking the question he didn't want to ask, "is this because of me?" He whispers out, his voice breaking with emotion. I stare at him with wide eyes, shocked by the question, and also unsure on how to reply to it.
"No! You didn't do anything wrong, I'm just a little touchy today." I instantly blurt out, not wanting him to feel bad, because I already know he's thinking about all the missed calls we've had. More than we could count just this week. He watches me, giving me an unconvinced look, running a hand roughly through his hair. We're both silent for a little bit, trying to figure out what was so different about this phone call compared to others, because this tension floating through the air has never happened before, I'm more unnerved than I've ever been with him.
"I know that's not true. I know it's getting to you, all the missed calls and late replies. It's getting to me too. I just don't know how to fix it baby, but trust me when I say I'm trying to." He whimpers out, causing my eyes to water even more at his obvious distress. I send him a watery smile and place a kiss to my promise ring, watching as he sends me a small smile while placing a kiss to the necklace he wears for me. It's a silver pendant with my first initial, he got it the same time he gave me this ring, which was over a year ago on our second anniversary together.
"I love you, even if things have been a little difficult lately. School has just been taking up so much of my time lately and it's hard to find times to talk when you're in a whole other country. It's not your fault and it's not mine, life just has a crazy way of handling things I guess" I mumble out, watching him nod his head, reaching a hand up to wipe his eyes of the unwanted tears. I wipe my eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie, only to look back at the screen, seeing him with a completely shattered expression. I freeze and practically stop breathing, scared of what he was about to say to me. A choked sob escapes him, tears making their way down his face as he holds onto the pendant dangling in front of his chest.
"You know I love you, right? You're my whole world, my soulmate, my everything. I wouldn't do anything if I didn't think it'd benefit you." He chokes out, his eyes blurry with tears as I stare at him with my own tears pouring down my face. I'm instantly filled with fear when I see the way he's acting, because he's never like this, which means whatever it about to happen is going to hurt me the same way it's hurting him. I breathe in shakily, spinning the promise ring around my finger, giving him a small nod before getting the courage to talk.
"I know you do, I love you too. We've always been soulmates and always will be. You're it for me, there will never be anyone else." I cry out, feeling like I'm saying a goodbye rather than reassuring him. He nods his head frantically, showing me that he agrees with my statement completely. I watch him open his mouth to speak, before another cry rips out from his throat, one that sounds completely and utterly heartbroken. I immediately wince upon hearing it, feeling my heart spike as I realize what he was leading up to, as I realize the what he's about to do for the both of us. I'm unable to open my mouth to talk, completely losing my mind as I sob and shake my head no, hoping it's enough to stop him before he says it. It didn't work.
"I love you. I love you so much that I'm doing this for you, I'm doing it for the both of us. I'm breaking up with you, I'm so sorry baby." He sobs out, feeling like he lost the one thing that ever truly mattered to him. The one thing that he'd give his career up for. I sit there completely frozen, unable to comprehend the words that just came out of his mouth, before my body shakes with the sobs I let out. I feel my chest physically ache like someone tried to rip my heart out, instantly reaching my hands up to hold my chest in hopes of easing the pain. I knew that heartbreak sucked, I just never knew how much it'd actually hurt.
"Please.. please don't do this. I love you Ruel. I need you." I cry out, my voice sounding so unattached from me, that I barely even register the words coming out. He watches me as tears and sobs shake his body, taking in everything about me for what he knows will be the last time for awhile. I watch the way his red rimmed green eyes flit over me through the screen, drinking me in with all that he can. Not even realizing my eyes are doing the same through their teary filled gaze.
"I love you baby, I love you with all I've got. I'm doing this for you, you need to focus on school and working for everything you've ever dreamed of. I don't want you to miss out on living your life over there just because I can't be with you. I'm only getting in the way of that, which means I need to let you go." He whispers out, our tears having finally been drained from our bodies, leaving us in a broken silence. I don't reply for a second, only hearing the shaky breathing we're both releasing, before I come to terms with the fact that he won't change his mind about this.
"I love you too. Promise you won't forget about me? No matter what happens, you can't forget about me-" I whisper out, watching the pained look on his face when my voice cracks. He gives me a shaky smile, his eyes filled with disbelief at my question. He opens his mouth to respond, but I beat him to it, not fully done with my requests. "and I'll always be your best friend right? Like you'll like all my insta posts still and you'll always tell me happy birthday?" I whimper out, knowing that the requests might sound dumb, but he'll understand what I mean. He gives me the same boyish grin I fell in love with, a few stray tears making their way down his puffy face.
"Baby I could never forget about you, you're my whole world. You'll be my best friend till the day I die, I'll like all your posts as soon as you post them, since I have notifs for you, and I'll tell you happy birthday at 12 like I do every time. I promise with everything inside of me." He states, trying to make his voice as strong as possible, but still not being able to fully hide the tremors that shake his voice. I give him a smile, knowing how terrible I must look right now, but not caring as I gaze at the beautiful boy who will always hold my heart in his hands.
"One last thing... promise you'll love me forever?" I choke out, feeling the way the call was on its way towards ending, wanting to hold on to any last bit of him for as long as I could. He lets out a exasperated scoff at my question, not even knowing where to start with it.
"I'll love you till the day I die and even after that. Our love is eternal sweetheart, no matter what we'll always make our way back to each other. I promise." He states with so much conviction, leaving no room to even question him. I nod my head and watch him, feeling my heart break all over again as I realize it's time to say goodbye. It's time to say goodbye to the love of my life. To my best friend. We spend a few minutes staring at each other, not wanting to deal with the inevitable outcome of ending this call.
"This isn't a goodbye, it's just a see you later, okay? We'll be together again, but not till the times right for us. I'm not giving up on you. I love you." He breathily lets out, staring into my eyes with nothing but pure love in his eyes. I whimper as he finishes his sentence, feeling my heart officially tear into two, knowing this was it. I wipe my eyes hastily, not wanting to miss the last seconds I have with him, wanting to look at him one last time before we end this call.
"I won't give up on you either, I'll see you later. I love you." I whisper out, watching the way he looks me over one final time. We send each other heartbroken smiles as I kiss my ring and he kisses his necklace, neither of us knowing when we'll be together again. He gives me a small wave while blowing a tiny kiss to the screen before the call disconnects, leaving me completely shattered.
———
Days seemed to pass by slower than ever, all filled with endless calls from the Van Dijk family, excluding the one person I wanted to call me the most. The breakup hurt their family almost as much as it hurt me, endless amounts of tears over FaceTime calls as the girls and Kate called me, not believing that we would ever break up. The moment they saw my puffy eyes and tear streaked face I could almost hear their hearts break, but slowly time seemed to heal my wounds. I wouldn't say fully healed even if it's been 2 years, but healed enough to where I can look at pictures of us without it ripping my heart out. This morning when I woke up, I saw that he had sent me a birthday message at 12, just like he always does and promised to continue doing so, leaving me a teary eyed mess from missing him.
Today I was meeting up with Coco and Sylvie for my birthday brunch, since the two flew down to Los Angeles to spend some time with me during my college holiday break. I stood in front of my mirror, putting on my final touches of makeup, and adjusting my clothes. Once I felt ready to leave, I walk out of my apartment and head down the street, to the small pastry shop the girls wanted to meet at.
As I walk in, I feel my stomach fill with excitement, ready to see the two girls who I love more than myself. Before I can even spot them, I hear Coco shriek, immediately running to pull me into a bone crushing hug. As soon as she lets me go so that I can breathe, I end up pulled into another tight hug, watching her laugh as Sylvie practically strangled me. Sylvie pulls away and drags me to the table they have, having already ordered for all of us since they know my order by heart after being so close all these years. They cheer out their happy birthdays to me once we sit down, handing me the gifts they bought me before they both look at me from across the table, with matching grins but what appears to be a slight hesitant look in their eyes.
"Spill the tea, I can tell by the looks on your faces you have something to say" I laugh out, watching as Coco roll her eyes. I give them a reassuring smile, hoping to ease their nerves on whatever they have to say, but feeling a pit form in my stomach since I know it probably has to do with the person I still haven't moved on from. Sylvie takes in a deep breathe, reaching out to grab my hand that's on the table, giving it a light squeeze. I'm immediately on edge at her actions, my mind instantly jumping to the worst conclusions, the first one being that he got a new girlfriend. Let's just say I was completely wrong with my assumptions.
"Have you moved on?" Sylvie blurts out, completely throwing me off, because they would be the first two to know if I ever did. I stare at them with wide eyes, not sure on how to reply to the question, because there's obviously a reason they'd have brought that up. I open and close my mouth a few times as I try to come up with something to say. The looks on their faces become more uneased at my lack of a response, causing me to blurt our the last thing I'd want to say.
"How can I move on when I check your brothers insta at least once every hour?-" I spill out, watching their faces instantly switch to those of amusement. I let out a groan at my embarrassing confession, covering my face as it heats up, praying that the ground will just swallow me whole. I uncover my face so that I can try and salvage what's left of my dignity, "what I meant was that I haven't moved on to anyone else, like the first thing I did when I woke up was check to see if he sent me a message. Why would you think I did?" I question them. I watch as both sets of eyes travel to the neckline of shirt, before they slowly trail back to my eyes, both with perplexed expressions.
"It's just that your necklace is off, like you haven't taken that necklace off ever, but all of a sudden it's not on you?" Coco slowly states, immediately causing my hand to fly up to my neck, feeling my shirt rather than the promise ring, meaning that my necklace was indeed missing from my body. I let out a groan as I realize I had left it in my bathroom, having had taken it off before my shower earlier, and not putting it back on when I left. The necklace only ever leaves my body when I shower, meaning that it's permanent residence is right against my chest, the same place the promise ring has layer ever since our breakup.
"Fuck, I never put it back on after my shower. It's on the counter of the bathroom, I must've forgot it since I was so excited about seeing you guys" I mumble out, feeling like I was missing part of me without the ring, especially on a day like today. The girls give me sympathetic looks, knowing how much it means to me, especially since it's the only thing I have that really connects me to Ruel. The girls swiftly change the conversation and talk about some of the gossip going around, before deciding we should just head back to my place.
Once we get back to my place we all sit down on my couch, their eyes wandering around and checking out some of the new things I've added since the last time they visited, softly smiling as they see I still have pictures of Ruel and I around. Coco grabs a frame and sends me a sad smile, her eyes looking over the photo fondly, what just so happened to be my favorite picture of us. The picture is one of my fondest memories of when Ruel and I were still together, we were all hanging out together on the beach, and Sylvie had snapped a pic when we weren't paying attention. Our skin was glowing in the orange light from the sunset while he looked down at me with a lovestruck grin and I was laughing at something Kate had said, as I lay sprawled across his lap. I don't think I'd ever been happier than I was at that moment.
"I miss you guys being together, but I know you'll find your ways back to each other. You have to" Coco whispers out, with teary eyes as she thinks about the pain Ruel and I had gone through with the breakup, and the pain she knows we're still feeling without each other. Sylvie nods her head while humming in agreement with her sister, silently praying that things work out soon, knowing her brother hasn't been the same since everything happened between us. I give them a small shrug, my own eyes tearing up, knowing what they want won't happen anytime soon, and I was right.
———
"You have got to be fucking with me?" I groan out, having just listened to the plans Coco just dragged me into. I hear her let out a sigh of frustration, annoyed that her plan wasn't working out the way she had hoped, and knowing she was silently cursing me in her head. I hear Sylvie mumbling something to her in the background, before hearing Kate and Michelle make noises of agreement. I instantly tense up once she starts talking again, knowing that there was no way out of these plans she had set up.
"You promised you'd see us all tonight since it's been a few months, you can't break a promise. Please I promise it'll be fun, please?" She states out, her tone becoming slightly pleading towards the end. I let out a sigh, running a hand down my face as I think about what would happen if I went. Like she has to understand why I don't want to go, this isn't going to just affect only me. I hear silence on the other line, knowing they're crowded around the phone, waiting for me to answer, I take a deep breath before speaking up.
"Guys this isn't only going to affect me. We were supposed to all see each other, you never said it would be at a concert. Let alone at fucking Ruels concert. I don't think I can" I mutter out, feeling my heart constrict at the thought of him. It might've been 4 years since the breakup, but that doesn't mean my heart doesn't still hurt when I think of him. We've talked since the breakup, but it's only ever been for birthdays, some holidays, and random messages here and there to say we hope the other is doing well. All in all, we've basically not legitimately interacted since the breakup, because I don't think either of us could ever be just friends with each other. Trying to be friends would only hurt us.
"Please, I wouldn't have you go if I knew it would hurt him. I love you both too much to do something that could harm either of you, please just trust me on this. He'd want you there." She softly states, knowing how sensitive this topic was becoming the more I thought of him. I let out a quiet groan, before quietly agreeing to go with them. I hear them let out cheers, all of them ecstatic at the fact that they were able to get me to agree to go. Completely oblivious to the plan they had made, the plan that I set into action by agreeing to go.
"Yes! See you soon babes, love you" Coco shrieks, barely letting me reply before hanging up. I sigh as I stare at my blank screen, fiddling with my ring as it lays against my chest, before heading to my room to get ready for the events taking place in a little bit. I start doing my hair, thinking about all the possibilities tonight holds, like the thought of being face to face with him seems unreal, I can only hope he doesn't feel uncomfortable with me being there.
I hum along to my playlist as I move on to my makeup, before freezing as a familiar tune starts playing. I listen as the beginning of painkiller fills my room, the memories from when this song was first written coming to the front of my mind. He had been nervously watching me as I lay across his bed, before hesitantly speaking up to tell me he wrote me a song, and of course I eagerly told him to sing it. I remember when he first started, I was completely enamored by him, feeling my eyes well up as I listened to the lyrics. That day was the first time we had said I love you to each other, when we both truly realized how much we meant to each other. That song means more to me than anything else in the world, it's not just the song that's important to me, but the day that means everything to me.
I clear my throat, dabbing at my eyes to get rid of any unwanted moisture, as I finally come back to my senses when the song finishes. I let out a sigh, continuing on with my makeup, before finally finishing up. I check my phone and see that Coco will be getting me in 20 minutes to head out, instantly causing me to rush around to find an outfit. While he probably feels nothing for me after so much time, I still want to at least look decent when we cross paths again. I get my clothes on and look at myself in the mirror, before deciding it's good enough. I head out of my apartment and walk out, instantly spotting Coco standing outside a car waiting for me. I run over to her, instantly embracing her in a tight hug, having missed her more than anything the past couple months it's been since I saw her last.
"Ready for tonight?" She questions with a look in her eyes that I can't decipher, but immediately puts me on edge. I narrow my eyes as I look at her, trying to gauge her emotions, because Coco isn't Coco without some sort of insane plan. She stares at me with doe eyes, appearing completely innocent, while she waits for me to reply to her.
"I don't know, it's been 4 years Co. Like that's a long time and I don't want to burden him you know" I whisper out, glancing out the window while feeling insecure at the thought of him possibly not wanting to even see me. Coco rolls her eyes at the back of my head, knowing that Ruel is still just as in love with me as he was when we were still together. She puts her hand on my knee and lets me think for the remainder of the car ride, while she tries to hide the smirk on her face, knowing the plan she had was going to work out perfectly on the unsuspecting pair.
We pull into the venue, getting escorted through the back entrance by security guards so that the fans couldn't see either of us. I'm thankful the fans couldn't see us because of the fact that they'd recognize me immediately, and start rumors on social media, even though there have been plenty of them since we broke up. Especially since he still likes all my insta posts and comments on them every now and then, fueling the fans to believe that the breakup wasn't real. The real fans know it was though, they could sense the instant change and shift in us, no matter how hard we tried to act happy and fine on our socials for them. Little did I know, Coco was happy the fans couldn't see me since it would fuck up her plan, because Ruel would basically be instantly notified of my presence.
We walk through hallways backstage before Coco leads me into a small room, where I'm instantly pulled into hug by Kate. She rocks us side to side, holding me as tight as she can, while the girls stand around with teary eyes watching the interaction. We finally pull away from the hug, Kate putting her hand on my face as she watches me with a look of pure motherly adoration, instantly making my eyes water with emotion.
"My other baby is finally back" Kate whispers out, the grin never leaving her face, feeling complete that all her girls and her son were finally in one place again. Kate has always called me one of her baby's or her daughter, because she said I was destined to be her daughter in-law so why not just start early. I let out a small laugh at the way Coco and Sylvie have their phones out to record, before walking over to give Sylvie a hug. We pull away and she compliments my outfit, before pushing me into the arms of Michelle. I let out a laugh as Michelle whispers that if I ever disappear for 4 years again, she'd kill Ruel and I for doing that to everyone again. We pull away from the hug and stand around conversing with each other about anything and everything, before the door opens and someone walks in.
"Oh you little fucking shit-" He laughs out as I turn my head, just to be pulled into a bone crushing hug by Nate. I laugh as he squeezes me, before letting me go to give me a stern look, causing me to smirk at him knowing he's about to lecture me. I watch as he takes a deep breathe, getting mentally prepared for whatever he's about to say, "you don't understand the hell I had to deal with the past four years, I've almost strangled him a good couple of times. Does he know you're here?" He groans out at first, before ending with an intrigued look. I shake my head at his question, causing him to look at the girls in surprise, completely unaware of the mission they were on. I see Michelle give him a look, causing him to smile and give her a slight nod, leaving me perplexed on what everyone seemed to be planning.
"Well he's doing soundcheck right now, so I got to go check on him, because I don't trust him. Like I don't care if he's 21, he's still not trustworthy enough to be alone without me" Nate groans with an eye roll, causing us all to laugh at the mischief Ruel causes, my heart clenching since it was one of the things I fell in love with about him. Nate sends me one last smile before heading out, leaving us in the room together yet again. I watch as Coco sends Kate a look, before turning to me with a blinding grin on her face. I instantly tense up knowing she has to be up to something, there's no other reason she'd have a smile on her face like that.
"So Kate and Michelle have to go see Ruel to just to check in on him, Sylvie wants to go find a vending machine for something to drink, and I need to find a bathroom to fix my makeup in" she explains, watching the way my eyes wander over her flawless face, seeing no reason for her to fix the makeup. Before I can question her, I'm already being pulled out of the room, and down a series of hallways. She stops outside of a light brown door, throwing it open and pushing me inside with her. I try to look around to see what room we're in, but Coco immediately starts talking, completely distracting me from even trying to look around.
"Can you help me fix my lipstick, I feel like it's getting on my teeth, and check the lining of it please" she practically begs, causing me to nod my head with a laugh. She hands me a q-tip from the table next to her and I instantly get to work, completely transfixed on the task at hand. I wipe around the inner lining of her lips, making sure it's still perfect but not too far back to get on her teeth, because who wants red stained teeth. Next I move on to the outline of her lips, lightly trying to straighten certain areas, praying I won't drag it onto her foundation. As I'm fixing her lipstick, her phone buzzes, causing her to pull away from me abruptly. I let out a surprised gasp, instantly narrowing my eyes at the look on her face, since she seemed ready to combust.
"Wait right here, I have to go grab my lip liner, I forgot to put some on, and don't want my lipstick to just disappear over the duration of tonight. Don't move, I'll be right back" she all but shrieks out, jogging out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her. I stand there watching the door, perplexed on what everyone seemed to be planning for me, before deciding to take a look around the room. I walk over to the desk, looking over some of the trinkets laying there, before the door is thrown open and someone's shouting.
"Why are you shoving me in here? Coco don't make me bite you lil bitch, Nate stop groping me for fucks sake" I hear an overly familiar Australian voice yell, watching the scuffling take place, before he finally gets shoved in and the door slams shut. I stand there frozen, completely in shock by the boy in front of me, my heart feeling like it might burst out of my chest. I stay silent as he bangs on the door, before spinning around with an eye roll when he realizes the doors blocked, only to freeze upon seeing me. We stay silent, both of us just staring at each other, taking in all the changes from growing up, and taking in all the familiar things we fell in love with about each other.
"It's been a while, yeah?" He mumbles out, playing with his fingers anxiously. I lightly scuff my shoe on the ground, too nervous to make eye contact with him right now, especially when I know my feelings for him never went away. I nod my head and continue to stare at my shoes, before looking up when he moves to stand in front of me. We make direct eye contact when I look up, his green eyes filled with an emotion I couldn't quite decipher, but felt oddly familiar.
"It's been four really fucking long years, which means we got some catching up to do after this concert, but uh only if you want to. I would love it if you did" he questions, giving me a anxious smile, it slowly dropping when I hesitate to answer. As soon as I see his smile drop and his eyes dim, I immediately reach out and place my hand on his arm, watching the way his eyes widen at the contact.
"Yeah, I would really like that." I softly state, watching him give me a boyish grin, instantly causing my face to heat up as I look away. Upon noticing my head turn away, he smirks at my blush and takes the opportunity to look at my outfit, his eyes instantly locking on the neckline of my top. I turn my head back to him to ask him a question, when I notice his eyes locked on my top, before I can ask what he's looking at, he reaches a hand out. I freeze as his hand grabs on to my chain, sliding his fingers along it until the promise ring he gave me lands in his fingers. He twirls it around, completely entranced by it, and completely oblivious to how close we'd gotten to each other. I open my mouth to come up with an excuse as to why I'm wearing it, only to be left shocked when he gives me a teary grin, reaching underneath his own shirt, pulling out the pendant. I let out a quiet sob when I see the little silver pendant, only to be pulled straight into the arms of the boy I've loved my whole life. He holds me and rocks us back and forth, one hand pressed to the back of my head, the other wrapped around my shoulders.
"I kept all my promises. Told you I wasn't going to give up on you." He whispers in my ear as I hold him as tight as I can, never wanting to let him go. He pulls away from me and cups my cheek with his hand, before leaning down and pressing a light kiss to my forehead. He rests his forehead against mine for a few seconds, just taking in the moment while it lasts, before we're both startled by the door flinging open. He immediately pushes me behind him, but the two had already seen all they needed to see.
"I KNEW IT WOULD WORK" Coco screeches, causing Nate to flinch as he stands with her, having came to collect Ruel since it was time to go on stage. Ruel rolls his eyes, but still has a lovesick smile on his face, before instinctively grabbing my hand and pulling me with him out the door. We walk hand in hand to where the stage is, hearing the thousands of fans out there screaming and chanting for him to come out, before coming to a stop next to the stairs for the stage. He looks at our hands before blushing and dropping them, leaving me there with a confused and slightly hurt expression. Upon seeing my face he instantly panics and starts rushing to explain himself.
"It's not that I don't want to hold your hand, I just don't want to rush straight into things after a four year break. Trust me, it's taking everything inside of me to not just jump back into how we used to be" he groans out, I laugh and grab his hand, really noticing how his hand still fits in mine perfectly. I get a little lost in thought, but come back when Ruel gives my hand a squeeze, just like what he would do back in the day.
"I get it, I want to rebuild everything too... I really missed you, like I never moved on from you." I whisper out, before Ruel pulls me in, holding me tight against him. He places a light kiss on top of my head, before holding me for a little longer. Nate comes over and tells him he has about a minute until he needs to go up, causing him to groan, not wanting to leave me when he just got me back. I laugh and pull myself out of his arms, tilting my head up to look straight into his eyes.
"I never moved on from you either, I couldn't. I told you we'd find the way when the time was right" he smirks out, causing me to roll my eyes, trust him to make a sweet situation cocky. He laughs at my attitude, before giving me one last squeeze, and holding his hand out. I look at it before sending him a giant smile, already knowing what he wanted to do. Neither of us noticed, but Michelle and everyone came to stand and watch, as Ruel and I did our pre-concert ritual. It was a handshake we had made as children, but kept adding on to the older we got. We finish it off, with the usual pinky promise, both of us kissing the opposite end, before he quickly kisses my cheek and bounds up the stairs. I stand there in shock, holding my blushing cheek, before turning my head to the girls who all hold knowing smirks.
"Looks like he added another thing to the ritual" Coco laughs out, causing me to roll my eyes, turning to watch Ruel from the side stage. He welcomes the crowd and starts to sing, the fans instantly singing every word, and watching him like he put the stars in the sky. After the first song, he turns to the band and asks them to pause really fast, making all of us confused, since this was not a planned break.
"I'm sorry if I'm a little jumpy today, or if I'm just a complete mess. I just got to reunite with the girl I've been in love with since I was a kid after four years apart, so yeah I am a mess-" he starts off, looking over to me with a large smile. I instantly blush and grin back at him, overwhelmed that he still feels the same way about me after all this time. The crowd starts screaming my name and chanting out the ship name they created for us way before we even got together, causing everyone to start laughing. Ruel glances over at me again as he starts talking, "I told you it wasn't a goodbye, it was just a see you later. Even the fans knew I was never going to get over you, I honestly didn't even want anyone else. It's always been you." He mumbles out. The fans instantly screaming as loud as they can, while I stand there in awe, tears streaming down my face. He jogs over and gives me a hug, before promising to spend all his time on catching up with me after the concert, leaving me there to sing my heart out to the songs that were written by the boy I love.
That night, I rekindled a love that was never lost, but rather put on hold. I know we said we'd take it a little slow, but that night I slept in the arms of the love of my life, feeling like I was whole again for the first time in years. I felt the overwhelming love I have for him completely fill me to the brim, because he's not only my best friend, but he's my soulmate. It's always been him.