The screaming always amazed me—
How loud fans can scream just to draw attention to their favourite artists. On paper, it's such a weird thing to do. When you hear one person scream, you immediately think something is wrong. You heart rate picks up and your mind goes red alert, instinct being someone needs help, is hurt, or in danger. But if you put twenty thousand people in front of a stage and they all scream, you think nothing of it. Screaming is what people want to hear in a stadium, but anywhere else it's in our human nature to think the worst.
In my dressing room five minutes till the show all I heard was screaming. Even all the way back here I could hear it muffled through the vents. They were all chanting for their favourite band, their icons.
I've avoided these icons all day.
When I got to the hotel I booked it to my new room in hope I wouldn't run into anyone. My mission was accomplished because I didn't meet a single soul I didn't want to. After getting settled there was soundcheck, I was suppose to be there for that until Sal told me to just get settled in and just take pictures of the show tonight instead. It was music to my ears because that just meant less time seeing Harry.
My day surprisingly was rather tame, after a long restful drive we arrived in Philadelphia the second stop on the trip. When I got to the hotel I showered, ate, and prepped for the show. I tried to push my nerves as way the entire day, hoping the concert would fly by and I wouldn't have to communicate with Harry at all.
When I got to the venue, I was escorted to the backstage like usual and shown my dressing room. This dressing room had fruit in it for me which I rather enjoyed.
I fiddled with my camera, putting in a new memory card. I luckily had plenty of backup memory cards, but I'm pissed he broke the other one. The show was suppose to start any moment, my nerves pumping because I always thought the worse was going to happen.
I ate fruit to distract myself, but my stomach was full. I couldn't help but pace, trying my hardest to get myself in order. I shouldn't be freaking out this hard, all I had to do was go take pictures of the band on stage. Once the show is done I can race back to the hotel and be alone. Then tomorrow I won't have to see them at all.
"Aven I need you out there please." I heard Sal knock on the door, my stomach pumping with heat.
"Okay." I shouted through the pineapple lodged in my cheeks.
I make sure I have what I need before pacing out the door and speeding down the narrow hallway. I tried to avoid contact with anyone because I was afraid the next person zooming around a corner would be him.
The long dressing room hallway was fairly empty as I nearly jogged down it closer to the noise of screaming fans. Everyone must've been on stage already, meaning the curtain was going to open any minute.
It kept my eyes down, turning on my camera while slightly jogging. I fiddled with the buttons until I heard a door open. I barely looked up until I smashed into a broad chest, literally taking my breath away.
My heart fell to my shoes before I looked up and was faced with Niall in a loose white sleeveless shirt. My eyes widened as our identical blue eyes connected. My throat went dry, my arms feeling heavy.
"You're going fast." He spoke.
Before I was about to say anything, I heard movement to the open door on the right. I turned my head and saw Louis and Liam coming out of the room Niall was just in. Liam smirked at me while Louis kept a straight face. They walked on either side of us so I was nearly circled besides my back.
Niall in front of me, Louis to my left, Liam to my right. They all stared down at me like I was on trial. I haven't faced them since finding out about what they did, they definitely know I know.
"She looks rather scared." Liam said to Niall like
I couldn't hear them.
"She is." Niall chuckled but with deceitfulness. "We heard you were the one spying yesterday."
My throat closed, my hands gripping the bulky camera really hard. They all stared darkly and waited for an answer, my brain going on lockdown. I couldn't decipher what to say, I was choking.
"I—I don't..um..I...."
"I–I–I." Niall mocks my stuttering, cocking his head side to side.
"Don't be a dick." Liam cackles, Louis staying silent and just staring at me with great intimidation.
"Looks like she's choked up." Niall scans my face like he can physically see the fear on it. He was a lot friendlier before, now he looked evil.
"Of course she is. She knows what we do now." Liam cackles, analyzing my body language.
"She thinks she knows anyway." They continued to talk like I was a science experiment they were examining. I felt the need for my inhaler all the sudden.
"I don't know what y–you mean." I coax, taking a step back until I felt a warm hard surface behind me.
I froze as the three of them stared at me but my back was to another built surface, a body. I shut my eyes immediately in realization there was somebody standing behind me too—knowing exactly who that somebody was.
"She lies too." The raspy voice at the back of my head spoke up, a chill going down my spine.
How long was he standing behind me...
I slowly turned around with my eyes shut, fearing what I'd see when I open them. I looked up and met eyes with green entities that were paining me to take in. He stared down at me with a monotone expression, the whites of his eyes bloodshot.
"What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost." He arches his brow, playing evil with the situation.
I didn't know what to say, my mouth was bone dry.
He sniffed for a second and fluffed his nose, staring into my eyes through his corrupted ones. He was on drugs, making me more nervous. I think they were all on something. Between his red eyes, his need to sniff through his nose, and what I've seen, he's on coke.
"Who's this?" Niall said from behind me, making me turn around to see he was holding my cellphone all the sudden.
He turned the phone to show me my lock screen of Winnie, my sister.
"How'd you get that?" I feel my back pocket.
I didn't even feel him slide that out of my jeans.
I go to grab it back but he just holds back and higher.
"My guess is sister, or maybe even daughter." He looks at the lock screen than looks my body up and down like he was trying to analyze if I had a kid.
"Sister." I mumble.
"Thought so." He nods.
"Please give it back." I murmur, standing in the middle of a testosterone pit.
"I will for a kiss." Niall puckers, holding the phone behind his back where I couldn't see it anymore. My heart fell to my shoes, my lips parting.
"Boys! Get on stage!" I heard Sal shout from the end of the hall, relief washing over me. He probably couldn't even see me standing in the middle of this huddle. I felt like I was in elementary in the middle of a bunch of bullies, but way worse.
"Better get going." Niall says quietly, giving me a half smile before three of them turn around and start walking away.
"Niall...can I have my phone please?" I whisper, knowing he hasn't given it back yet. I was so nervous to speak and I hate myself for it.
He turns back around to face me while walking backwards towards the stage.
"I already did." He smirks, my eyebrows furrowing.
My hands slide down to my jeans again, going to feel my back pocket to where I grasped an object. I pulled it out and realized it was my phone he magically got in my back pocket again. I was extremely shocked because I was facing him and didn't feel anyone slid it in my back pocket.
He looks at the phone in my hands and drops his jaw with a fake gasp, pretending to be shocked.
I was so confused how he did that, it was like a magic trick.
I gripped the phone as he hurried away with Louis and Liam to the stage. I could still feel the body heat radiating against my back.
"How did he—"
"Niall's known to quick with his hands." I heard the faint voice behind me that was demanding to be heard.
Large hands run up the side of my arms, engulfing them with long fingers. A shiver ran down my back in a cold decrepit way, an unwanted feeling. It wasn't until the hands reached all the way up to my shoulders to where I felt him lean into my head from behind me and calmly exhale.
"But I won't even begin to tell you about mine.." His thumbs dig into the back of my shoulders in a rubbing motion, causing a release of tension in my muscles.
I swallowed the dry lump in my throat from his words. I wanted to run but my feet were too scared to make a move and flee from him. My abdomen stayed flexed, my lungs frozen with a need of an exhale.
He pulled his hands back and drifted them down my arms again, suddenly grabbing my hips firmly.
"Run along." He rasped into my ear, softly nudging my hips forward so I walk away.
In fear I paced forward and out of his hands, speed walking to the stage and not looking back at him.
I grabbed my opposite elbows, walking very fast just to rid him from my presence. My knees were a little shaky and I couldn't even begin to dissect the crazed thoughts going through my head. I paced harshly towards the side stage, hoping that was my last exchange for the day.
I ran out to front stage where the audience screamed awaiting the band. My chest felt heavy, seeing the whole arena dark but ear piercingly loud. I stand between the front row barriers and the stage, off the the left.
I stared at the audience, all of them looking so desperate for the band to come out. My heart raced when the screaming got louder, causing me to turn my head and see the curtain was opening.
I grip my camera as the spot light came on and the first hard strum of the electric guitars began. Harry was revealed centre stage, his fingers weaving through the guitar cords as he began. Leather fingerless gloves were on his hands, just a black Rolling Stones t-shirt on his body so you can see the mirage of black ink covering both his arms from wrists to shoulders.
He started singing into the mic, the crowd going crazy, spotlights came up on the others as they all started to play. My chest felt pained and heavy, my head starting to ache. I held the camera in my hands that were mildly shaking as I stared at them playing. I looked at the front row of screaming girls and hollering guys, everyone dressed in some form of black and ripped clothing. The girls were divided into two groups, ones that came because the loved the music, others that came because they were into the band.
I turn my head back to the stage, lining my camera up to focus a picture on Harry. My hands were shaking, making it extremely difficult to take a decent picture.
When I looked at him through the viewfinder, I took a snap picture of him looking down at his guitar playing. I looked at his hands again through the camera but got a disturbing glimpse of them covered in blood. My lungs compressed at the image I gave myself, a flashback of what I saw just yesterday.
I push the thought aside and raised my camera up again but to focus on someone else. I zoomed up on Louis, trying to get a good action shot until my fearful mind got another bad glimpse. It was of Louis in latex gloves, sorting through mounds of illegal narcotics.
I put the camera down and shut my eyes for a second, trying to control my mind with its erratic thoughts. I shook my head and opened my eyes again, feeling a dizziness in me.
I looked at the audience screaming in cheer for a band they have no actual clue about. They don't know what these four people do when they aren't on stage, what acts they commit. The band Duplicity was not what they seemed, but to the world they were just talented young guys. They had secrets, big secrets that I may never find out.
No one knew that behind Harry's fingerless gloves were purple knuckles and split skin. No one knew that just yesterday Louis' and Liam's hands were dug into the amount of drugs that could knock out this whole city.
These guys everyone cheered for were soaked in crime.
I stare at them on stage, knowing who they really are. My chest started to raise up and down in anxiety while my legs started to ache. The screaming and hollering of fans made my head spin as everything was just so much. No mater how deep I breathe my lungs wouldn't retain enough air.
My hands started to feel numb, my head too heavy for my neck. I stared at Harry singing into the mic, eyes landing on me for just a moment of time. The eye contact sent my mind to an image of him staring at me through the crack of the jaw door, sweaty curls hanging in his face and eyes full of darkness.
The flashback image in my head winded me, my lips parted in discomfort. I dropped my camera so it hung around my neck, my hand going to my stomach where it spun like a storm. The base from the speakers vibrates at my feet, my throat going tight like something bad was happening.
I started to feel dizzy and nauseous being here, the thoughts of everything I've experienced this far not stopping. I needed air, I needed water.
But it was too late when suddenly I couldn't even take a step. My eyes started to drift and I started seeing doubles of Harry singing and playing the guitar. The loud cheering and the music was the only thing I could perceive as my eyes rolled back in my head and my breath was taken from my lungs. I collapsed.
The last thing I heard was the sound of a guitar strumming out harsh of the melody tune, then the music coming to an abrupt stop.
//