So... Last afterword I mentioned how fast time flew by when the 1st year anniversary arrived. This time I'll express my disbelief on how I've spent 2 years writing this story. I can believe 1 year, but 2 is a little out there. It's really incredible to me because this fanfiction came about at a time where I was feeling really low as a writer. I made a bunch of crossover Nickelodeon fanfictions, but at some point I was just getting lazy. My writing wasn't the best but those were better than my first fanfictions where I was a total beginner and wrote in script and got so many harsh reviews it's a wonder how my rookie spirit wasn't crushed. I'm so grateful to the people who did like the story despite the script writing and out there plot and to the people who actually critiqued and gave advice. It really did help in the long run. As for the people who gave me such harsh reviews... I can't really blame them; the story really did suck. It had potential, but it couldn't be saved. Even now that I feel more confident than I ever had and looked back on it, it couldn't be saved. I had to do a hard reset. But that's another documentary length story I'll possibly save for a possible afterword for that story (Seriously the history behind it has a high chance of being much, much longer than the history for this one).
So after 50 plus chapters of my original run of Adventures of the NGS Trio, I decided that I wanted to try and tell a 1st-person Metal Gear fanfic starring Venom Snake. It was okay. I was a little lazy on that one too, but in my defense, I had no experience with telling a story with really deep depth. Maybe that's why I could get away with my Nickelodeon crossovers, but even then I got pretty lazy regarding those at some point. Thinking back, I believe I was giving more style than substance. I would just have something I thought was cool or funny without the appropriate build-up which meant the impact was poor. And eventually, I just couldn't think of anything to write. I mean I had ideas, but none that I could fully realize. Some I even started but never finished and eventually I was losing the confidence I was building up.
And then I got the idea to write this story. This one probably would have been a make-it or break-it for me. I wouldn't have quit as a writer, but I probably would have been in for a long hiatus. But, I was determined for this one and did something I didn't do for my others stories even after I got out of script writing. I read my old chapter books to learn about sentence and paragraph structure. I studied how dialogue worked, other words to use instead of just said and how to establish characteristics and appearances with character actions.
Going a bit off subject but it was actually during that time that I realized that I could still include a lot of dialogue in writing. One of my favorite parts of writing is the dialogue. I can't explain why at the moment, but I love writing character dialogue. It was actually one of the reasons I choose script over novel writing. I used to think I wouldn't be able to include that much dialogue unless I wrote in script. Well, considering all the dialogue I put in this story, in hindsight this is just hilarious trivia. Another piece of un-important trivia is that when I do the dialogue in this story, I sometimes just write without stopping because the character's replies to each other would just come to me.
Back on track, I was ready to put the results of education to work. I got to work that night, went to sleep, woke in the morning, got back to work and by 1:10 p.m. I realized something. I was retreading the beginning of the game. I thought I could just insert Shujinkou and alter some dialogue then get to the real meat of the story, but fortunately I remembered first impressions were vital. Hardly anyone was going to read because they did not come for a retread and Shujinkou was not interesting enough to hook readers in. Plus, this was a fanfic; anyone reading this was already a fan and knew the universe. Those revelations made me realized that I just needed to work on Shujinkou, establish his place in the story and his relationship with the girls.
So, I had to start all over again. The problem for me though was that I was determined to post it on that same day. That's not the reason for the short chapter length; I just wasn't good with making long chapters back then. So, I got to work and by the time I was finished it was around 5 p.m. It was finally time to post the story and I was nervous. Like I said earlier, my confidence sort of tanked and I had legitimate fears that I may get harshly ridiculed like with my second fanfiction. To my absolute shock, I actually got a review that was good. Not only that, but I was under the belief that my stories were the only thing that got readers through my bad writing, and yet my writing was the thing that was complimented. The very subject that probably made the worst impression on readers and I got complimented for it. I had to let that sink in for a bit.
I was also afraid I would be criticized for getting characterization wrong, despite studying the game to make sure I would get the characters to act and respond how they should. In fact, I'm always worried about that one. The rest is history from there. I wanted to focus on the development of the characters and the strengthening of their bonds. I always reminded myself that one nice moment between two people does not instantly make them the best of friends, because I wanted to avoid the same pitfalls that got me before. This time I wanted substance, not just style and took my time with the characters. It was also because of this story that I realized that while good establishing character moments are important, I don't have to dump every single character trait on the first go. Which brings me to the biggest risk this story faced when writing it: Shujinkou.
I mentioned this before but I wanted to make sure that I didn't create a bland protagonist, but I also couldn't think of anything that would have made him stand out. It was my first time telling a slice of life story so it's not like I could have a spectacular opening scene that involves sneaking into an enemy camp or see a man lifting a car over his shoulders. There was also a little pressure regarding the fact that if I couldn't get people to like him enough, the story was doomed. Giving him his daydreaming quirk was to remedy his blandness but before that became a genuine personality trait; I kind of viewed it as more of a gimmick/crutch to rely on until I could give Shujinkou something. The same goes for his cheek scratching tic. When I did get a semblance of an idea, it was that Shujinkou would be kind, but also sort of indifferent to the world around him as well. That obviously didn't last long and I'm not even sure how well that idea translated to the story. But it worked out for the best because that character evolution also served as great character development in my personal opinion. I also had the idea of having him compare his situation to fictional media, but I never found a moment for that trait to show and I eventually forgot about it.
The thing was, I didn't want him to be just a pair of eyes to view the world of the story but an actual character. Believe or not, throughout the entire first act, I always asked myself whether Shujinkou was a generic avatar for the reader or was there enough to him that made him stand out as his own character. It was because of that question I always asked myself that I would always add little things that weren't always important but felt human and unique to his character.
What could he possibly do when upset? He may hide in a cardboard box to think out his problems. How could he possibly confront a major moral decision? His shoulder angel and devil can appear in the form of Mickey Mouse. What will he do sometimes when reading at home? He may play with a bubble pipe to feel distinguished. I made sure to put in little stuff like those that don't affect the story, but I thought added more character to him.
I also always made sure to show off how his thought process works and how he can sometimes get lost in his own thoughts, like in the Chapter 52 where it begins with him thinking of his history playing the first three Sly Cooper games. Far from the indifferent daydreamer he was at the start, Shujinkou became a kind individual who cares for those around him no matter how strong their bond is and is willing to do things that he would consider awkward just to keep them from being upset, while at the same time seeing himself as nothing special.
You would think him thinking he was nothing special was just him being instinctively humble, but it was later shown to be a part of his own self-depreciation, an aspect of his character I wasn't fully aware of. He would also blame himself in a situation, but would never allow others to blame themselves or try to find a way to cheer them up. Maybe the self-depreciation thing was an attempt to keep him from being the perfect nice guy, I don't really know. Sometimes characters can just grow on their own, but I am happy Shujinkou's character as he is now. Slowly allowing himself to open up to others again and just developing via the friendships he made like he helped the girls develop through the friendship he's given them.
That was the ultimate goal of the story, for the characters to grow and learn to support each other. Shujinkou was always the thread that connected the club, but it would allow them to begin to grow closer to each other later. I had some qualms about labeling Shujinkou as "The Heart" of the club, but considering how I wrote the story, I couldn't deny that fact.
Family Dynamic
I guess before I move away from just discussing Shujinkou, I should probably get into his family dynamic. I promised I would answer any questions that I could, so here goes. To start things off, let's talk about him and his father, Jomei. Jomei was always a distant man to his son, which served to plant the seeds of his self-depreciation. If his own father appeared to not care for him much, why would he believe others would? He also had the misfortune of walking in on his father during a very intimate moment. After Jomei left, Shujinkou blamed himself. His father's sudden departure also contributed to him closing himself off from everyone and he began his habit of daydreaming to escape reality.
As for his mother, Hiro, the two share a close bond. She's always been caring to her son and Sayori and during his period of shutting himself off, she would engage in activities with him in an attempt to make him happy. While Shujinkou recognized this after joining the Literature Club, but that period deeply saddened her and she would sometime cry herself to sleep over what happened to trigger Shujinkou's unhealthy habit.
In regards to her relationship to Jomei, they never really had any fights though she would always ask if he would be a bit more fatherly. He never said anything to anyone when he left, and while his sudden departure hurt Hiro, she had more pressing matter to deal with. She doesn't hate him; she actually doesn't really know how to feel about him. Though if they were to run into each other, she would most likely be emotionally unprepared for such an encounter.
I also made sure to make it obvious how Sayori feels about Jomei. While she has affectionate nicknames for Shujinkou's family such as "Auntie H" and "Granny Hisa", she simply refers to Jomei by his name or "Shujinkou's Father". Though she'll be cheerful around him like she is with everyone else, Sayori never really liked how much he upset Shujinkou as a child which evolved to just plain not liking him after he left. The only reason she suggested Shujinkou should spend time with him during their reuninon was because she hoped it would help him gain closure. Shujinkou was aware of this fact, which is why he never told how their day really went. Despite keeping to himself about what really happened, Sayori suspects that it wasn't good.
Hisa shares Sayori's sentiments towards Jomei and won't really hesitate to express how much she does not like him to his face.
Original Characters
This is a subject I dreaded when I got past Chapter 1. I knew there was only so long I could go on without introducing new characters regardless of their importance. I didn't have complete belief that I was handling Shujinkou that well at first, so I had even less belief that I could make more characters that were actually compelling. Even now, I still wonder. But if Shujinkou is anything to go by, maybe it's a good thing. It makes me strive to constantly work on their character and avoid being lazy with their characterization. Like I said earlier, I probably wouldn't have added all those little things that aided in building Shujinkou's character if I wasn't a little unsure. Anyway let's get on to the original characters I made so far.
- Fuyu: Making her debut in Chapter 14, I was wondering what kind of person she would be. All I had at first was Student Council President, but that's not a character trait. I couldn't decide between cold and distant or warm and compassionate. So I decided to compromise and created her "President Mode", a state where she appeared to be a no-nonsense individual. It's because of this state that caused her to develop a reputation as an "ice queen." Until her debut, Monika was the only one was not disturbed by her presidential mode, though this may be due to the fact that she helped her get elected in the first place.
When she's not on duty, she plays video games. She's such a big video game enthusiast that she researches general trivia and could understand almost any video game reference. Her love of video games also provided Shujinkou some comfort as it gave him something to talk to her about.
She's also the daughter of a therapist and tries to keep her mother from psycho-analyzing everyone.
- Akuma: Don't really want to talk about him.
- Hiro: So here's the thing about Hiro... She was basically Hisa. I thought of her first, gave her the personality that Hisa had and one chapter after her debut I changed my mind about that. Instead I decided to try and make her a little closer to Shujinkou; not a clone, but to be a little similar. She can be a bit socially awkward and somewhat introverted which contrasts her mother.
She also likes sewing, but is currently bad at it and constantly tells herself not to do it without her teacher around. She doesn't listen.
But despite all that, she deeply cares for Shujinkou and Sayori to the point where the latter considers her an aunt. She also has no issue with the fact that all of Shujinkou's friends are girls, but constantly worries over saying or doing that could embarrass him. She really does not want her son to think she assumed he joined a literature club just to be around girls.
- Hisa: Shujinkou's young-looking grandmother, something the Monika, Yuri and Natsuki could not get over at first. The fact that she looks so young despite her age actually makes them wonder if Shujinkou and Hiro will look that young in the future. Hisa herself is business professional with a playful side. She can't help to tease Shujinkou over his current situation, but she's well aware that he had no alternative motives to joining a club that was then comprised of girls.
Unlike Hiro, she shares Shujinkou's cheek scratching habit, but does not do it as often as he does. She can be kind and fun to be around, but if you get on her bad side, she can knock a person unconscious like she with Jomei.
I was initially wary about giving Shujinkou a maternal grandmother that owned a very popular spa resort because of the implication being that he came from money. That said, she was never asked for money and doesn't spoil Shujinkou any more than a grandmother would. She also shares a close relationship with Sayori to where one would assume that they were related.
- Jomei: I pretty much said all I had to about Jomei earlier so I guess all I can say is that he travels a lot after leaving his son and wife behind.
- Kiyoko: After the events of the spa resort arc, I wanted to introduce a character with a calm and casual personality. She's so calm in fact that birds have no problem approaching her and she doesn't mind their company. She also sleeps whenever she can at school and yet makes good grades. Her casual attitude towards moments that would elicit more negative reactions from others was something that confused Shujinkou at first, but he eventually found it easy to talk to her because of it.
She's an observant individual and her calm mindset allows her to keep a rational mind in stressful situations. This mindset also makes it almost impossible to really get upset; not even the death of her parents got much of a reaction from her.
She also has no problems stating what kind of relationship she has with others, such as when she casually pointed out to Shujinkou that despite their few good interactions, they were not friends. Though she had no problem becoming friends with him, she knew that at that moment they were acquaintances at best.
- Yuki and Yumi: Ah, the fear of creating family members that will look foolish if canon family members were ever introduced. But I had an idea and I needed to family members to exist for the plot. Despite that mentality, I fully intended to give the characters the same effort when it came to personalities as I did with Shujinkou.
Let's start with Yuki. She's a little girl that adores her older sibling and her stuffed companion, Grimm. Grimm used to be a normal stuffed bear, but Yuki took it apart and sewed it back together because she thought it looked cooler that way. She'll sometimes do it again depending Grimm's mood. Despite her bright and cheerful disposition, she's into things that kids would consider creepy and would rather read the original versions of fairy tales than the versions that were altered for kids her age. Some kids may think she's a little weird because of this, but she doesn't really care.
She also developed an instant liking to Shujinkou due to his willingness to play with her and liked him even more after learning that she went along with Yuri's charade with the hopes that they get together for real.
As for Yumi, I can't avoid thinking about Code Lyoko whenever I bring her up. Anyway, I guess I was going for a calm woman that takes things in stride. For example, instead of being mad that she was lied to during her debut appearance, she'd rather see it as someone putting themselves through an awkward experience to help her daughter. It's because of this that Shujinkou is likely to be a little less nervous around her if they ever run into each other again.
- Rei: Rei's conception was due to my out of nowhere desire to work with a silent character; a character that you would have to pay attention to their actions to gain an understanding of who they are. She's also the adopted sibling of Fuyu a fact that shocked Shujinkou and Sayori when they found out. But despite being siblings, Rei does not act any different around her than with the others. As such Fuyu has no idea what their relationship is, but still looks out for her like any sibling would. Also, due to her silence and lack of visible emotions, others try their best to avoid treating her like she's incapable of functioning on her own.
Despite that, she does seem to have trouble understanding a few things that others are well aware of, which makes it harder for the others to avoid slipping into babying her. She also prefers to wear shirts and jackets that cover up her hands for some reason or another.
Hiroko: ?
Behind the Scenes
Chapters 46-49: Selfish. So following Doki Doki Slumber Party, I suddenly felt an intense need to tell the tale of how Shujinkou ended up joining the Literature Club. I did originally plan on having the story unfold exclusively from Sayori's perspective, but that was later changed as I felt that it would be better to see both of their perspectives. I also used this story as a chance to show what Shujinkou was like before he joined the club.
My personal favorite part of this 4-parter was writing Sayori's dialogue for Selfish Part 4. I guess it was I felt like I truly earned any emotional impact that scene may have had. I don't if it impacted anyone, but my empathy with fictional characters had me tearing up (Though it may also just be that thinking about tears, causes me to tear up a little no matter my mood).
Chapter 50: Alone in a Boy's Room II. As the title indicates, Natsuki finds herself in Shujinkou's home once again. I kinda considered this to be the chapter where she finally drops all her shields around her and cements her belief that Shujinkou is a genuinely nice person.
Chapter 51: End of the First. This chapter was made with the intention to bring the first semester to a close while also setting up the summer section of the story. Had some fun with the dialogue between the club in this one.
Chapter 52: Summer intermission. As the name implies, this chapter begins the intermission between Act 1 and Act 2 (Which is funny considering that I consider the Summer Break section to be part of Act 1...) I always wanted to tell stories during the character's vacation but I also felt like I needed to develop the bonds between the characters even more before I could start Act 2, specifically Monika and Yuri. So I got to work on that right away and began to further Shujinkou and Monika's friendship.
It's in this chapter where Shujinkou starts to feel a bit more comfortable voicing his own ideas.
Chapter 53: Perspective. This chapter came about as a completely random desire to do a chapter from Natsuki's perspective; to show her thoughts and feelings during the events of Alone in a Boy's Room.
Chapter 54: Downtime. This chapter was just to showcase more of Kiyoko's character.
Chapter 55: Paper Lanterns. Chapter 52 served to further the bond between Shujinkou and Monika, so it was time for me to get to my other objective before the festival portion. Not much to say on this one, because I would just be repeating myself at this point. Though I will say I felt like I completed my objective.
As for the attempted kiss, I couldn't always have these moments played straight, so I had Hiro unintentionally ruin the moment. But why was Hiro on the ground when she was found?
Chapter 56: Positive Experience. A nice moment between a mother and son. That's all I got for this one.
Chapter 57: Selfless. Serves as a sequel to the Selfish 4-Parter. I don't really have much to say about this one. It was pretty straight forward planning and writing.
Chapter 58: Perspective II. I just felt like making another perspective chapter.
Chapter 59: Our First Trip Together. Not much here. What I can say is that I did have doubts including Rei, Kiyoko and Fuyu on this trip. Was not really sure if they would offer much without coming off as forced.
Chapter 60: 2nd Visit. Before I ever wrote this chapter, I initially planned on the group having a hard time getting to the resort. It was basically going to be like they had to go on a small adventure before their actual trip. The only issue I had was that I couldn't think of anything interesting at the time and for that plot to work, I would need to find a way to prevent Hisa from dropping everything to get them. So that had to be scrapped. What was left of that idea was the character mentioning how they arrived later than they thought due to a mistake on Sayori's part.
The point of the actual chapter was for the cast to settle in before they enjoy the last week of their vacation. Also, it should be noted how during their conversation near the end, Fuyu and Kiyoko didn't get many lines, something the former is aware of.
Chapter 61: Sugoi. A transitional chapter. Nothing more to say here.
Chapter 62: Beside the point. Jomei is back and needed something that was in Hisa's possession. She said no and he exited the story once more. I never really had any intention on him having any major impact on the current story arc which is why he only appeared for a short time. The only real effect he had so far was confusing Shujinkou.
The other half of the chapter had Monika admitting how she doesn't feel like she's lived up to the role of being a club president since she hasn't solved as many problems as Shujinkou. Kiyoko cheers her up by reminding her that it's okay to have others' strengths to rely on while she works on that aspect, once again showing the girl who enjoys downtime has a bit of wisdom to her.
Chapter 63: Maiden's Guilt. I mentioned earlier about the girls becoming closer after befriending Shujinkou. Well, I figured that I wouldn't be able to go any further without addressing Natsuki's and Yuri's differences. It was around this time that I felt it was time to delve into that, but to do that I had to show how much the two had developed since the beginning of the story. This chapter was to showcase Yuri's development while the next few chapters were to showcase Natsuki's
Chapter 64: Road to the Royal Rumble. I guess I the long run, this chapter was pretty superfluous. It's like before or during a story arc of a popular TV show with new episodes that come weekly and they decided to insert a recap episode before the really exciting part. But it did give me a chance to continue working on the dialogue between Sayori, Fuyu and Natsuki.
Chapters 65-68: Natsuki's Royal Rumble Logs. I'll be honest; these logs were result of disastrous planning, rewrites and an inability to find a way to show the event how I intended with each version. As revealed in the final log, there was a conspiracy related to the crown. I initially planned for the characters separated from Natsuki, Fuyu and Sayori to learn about and tell them, fueling Natsuki's desire to win. There was also going to be a scene that involved cheating that forced Shujinkou to step in and finish the battle with "Xemnas". I also came up with a similar scene, but Natsuki insisted to keep on fighting herself. I didn't really care for those and scrapped them.
I also felt like I didn't properly build up the conspiracy and it would have came out of nowhere when it was revealed. That was certainly a problem when I was already in too deep with the Royal Rumeble. I did not know what to do; anyone who read the story as I originally intended to write it would have been confused and lost. That's when I got an idea. I would tell the events of the Royal Rumble strictly from Natsuki's perspective; that way both Natsuki and the reader would be lost and confused by the sudden revelations.
I also found it as another good way to showcase Natsuki's character development, especially if compared to her thoughts contained in the first perspective chapter.
Chapter 69: Heart-to-Heart. So, I was a little worried writing this chapter. I had to make sure that I didn't make it seem like I had a bias in Natsuki's and Yuri's conflict. They both made mistakes and it was only through the development they had throughout the story that they realized those mistakes. In the end, I felt like I made an unbiased conversation between the two.
The second heart-to-heart between Natsuki and Shujinkou was planned to happen later, but since the one between her and Yuri didn't last as long as I thought, I decided to include it in this one.
Chapter 70: What They Mean to Me. This chapter was the result of my desire to have somewhat commemorate 2 years of writing. I had no idea what to do at the time so I decided to make a chapter that contained Shujinkou's full, unfiltered thoughts regarding the school semester so far and the relationships he had.
Chapter 71: Happiness. For this chapter, I wanted to do something a little different. Throughout the story, Shujinkou would find ways to help the girls and make them feel better about themselves. Yet, he never had a major moment like that and no matter how many compliments he's received, he would always be surprised to hear such things. It was finally time him for experience what he had been providing himself.
The section with Monika admitting to Shujinkou what she told Kiyoko was something I was going to happen later, but when I decided to make the chapter the way is, I figured it would work best here. Also I wrote it to serve as a callback to what Shujinkou said to her during the events of Chapter 52.
At the end of the chapter Shujinkou started to cry tears of joy and-
Chapter 72: Floating Lights. Did anyone really think that I wouldn't include a beach scene during an arc that took place during the summer? I had it planned all along; I was just bidding my time. Honest... I wasn't potentially thinking not to include one because I don't know how to have fun on a beach...
In all seriousness, there's not really much to say (or I can say) about this chapter. I guess I could say that I felt like I needed to give Rei and Monika a little focus. I also slipped in the line about Kiyoko's parents because... Well I guess because. Also the whole changing from fireworks to floating lights was a blatant last minute change, but it gave me something to work with; more so than the fireworks. It also allowed me to make a callback to Sayori's goodbye from Chapter 49 through Shujinkou's last line.
More Trivia
Why did no one tell me that Couples' Dessert was misspelled "Couples' Desert" for 2 years?! Why?!
In all seriousness, I can't believe I did not realize my mistake for 2 years. Now for some more miscellaneous trivia that couldn't have its own section.
I remember one of my earlier reviews saying that judging from the first chapter that this would be a Yuri x MC fanfic. That's pretty funny considering she used to be my favorite Doki. So when writing this story, I had to keep myself from being bias. Honestly it wasn't that hard. That said, writing this story allowed me to gain a greater appreciation for all four of them, so they're all pretty equal in my eyes now.
More trivia... More trivia... Um... I got it! Another piece of trivia is that working on this story gave me the drive to work on my anime-style fanart. I was afraid of doing that, because I would have something to compare mine too. But when I was trying to make a visual design for Kiyoko, I ran into an unexpected issue; the initial design was too close to Monika. I tried to make it different, but I couldn't. It was at that point I realized that if it was that close to Monika, then why not just draw Monika? I finished the drawing and I was struck by disbelief. It wasn't that bad and that made realize that I better at than drawing anime-style artwork than I gave myself credit for.
I also view my writing and drawings as something that goes hand in hand, so they both can have an effect on each other, such as Natsuki's attire for the Royal Rumble.
Um... that's all I got for now, though I'm sure I'll think of more after this is posted.
Concluding Statements
Well, it took 2 years but I finally finished the first act of the story. I would like to thank all the readers who enjoyed the story. Without you guys I wouldn't have pushed myself to better myself in my writing, which lead to me pushing myself to become better at drawing. I know I'm not the best writer ever, or the best writer in this fandom, or even the best writer on the page this story pops up on and I doubt I ever will be any of those. But you all dealt with me and allowed me to grow and for that you have my gratitude. You guys are the best.