After having to sit through the most boring and at the same time most stressing meeting in your entire life so far, you finally understood why Kylo dreaded council meetups so much. The topics were never interesting and everyone seemed to oppose everyone else. They had their own groups in which they mostly agreed with each other but not even that was consistent. It didn't help that you had to stand for the three hours it took. Unmoving with your hands behind your back. By the end you were certain that you would not need to work out anymore.
Kylo looked up to you a few times. Neither of you knew what the other's expression was but it wasn't hard to guess. Probably an exasperated look, annoyance...discomfort...any negative emotion you could feel. The other council members weren't any better though. It was a painful ordeal and none seemed to enjoy it much. Some, like Hux with Kylo, just had to disagree with each other no matter how senseless it seemed. Certain people thrive on conflict, and this was not a position anyone could get without stepping on many feet.
At first it was interesting to watch. Seeing so many powerful individuals in one room arguing with each other was a once in a lifetime thing. Buuut it got old very fast. In fact it got so boring that whenever one of them had finished a sentence you had already forgotten the beginning. Kylo was a man of action, he didn't like nonsensical talk about nothing and it showed. Given you had no strategic experience whatsoever you didn't want to judge either approach.
And then...it was over. Concluded. You had spaced out so much you hadn't even realized their horrendous talking had come to an end. What a relief! Your brain was still functioning!, You could finally move your limbs again! Kylo was about as relieved as you were and let out a long sigh after everyone had left. You patted his shoulder and he looked up to you, shaking his head.
"Every time. It's like this every time.", he grunted and bashed his head against the back of the chair.
"Don't do that! That does not help.", you complained and he let out a distorted chuckle, "If you have to bash a head against something do it with Hux's. There is not much that can break anyway."
He didn't say anything for a few seconds and you wanted to apologize for having stepped over a line when he chuckled again.
"You are right.", he stood up and mustered you, "I know you can not read my thoughts but sometimes it surely feels like it."
You felt your face becoming warmer. Masks were truly amazing. Atleast you could wear one more often now. Funnily enough it was not out of embarrassment but because he made you feel proud. You looked up to him like you had to noone else before. Trusted him more than your lost brothers. It was a truly special relationship and seeing that he felt the same way about it filled you with immense pride.
Both of you decided that it was best to get lunch. After discussing your first mission, Kylo got a bit more quiet. He didn't like you leaving, you knew as much. It was still necessary, after all you had to prove your worth and capabilities to the council. From what you had seen today, they already mistrusted him enough. There was no need to give them additional ammunition against him.
He also showed you your new official quarters. There was a door that led to his own chambers so you could keep sleeping over at his place, or quickly change from your Doc personality into Vornskr. The rooms were huge, but you couldn't care less, after all you wouldn't use them. You didn't even use your own small bedroom in his medbay. It did not bother you, on the contrary you wanted to continue sleeping over. He made you feel safe, protected you and woke you up whenever you had nightmares.
Shortly before Kylo had to leave you were introduced to your body double. It really was just a body double, your general shape and curves were the only things you two had in common. Apparently she was a stormtrooper, she did not know what your abilities were, just that she was supposed to be your doppelganger. She was friendly but distant, good. From what you could see she wouldn't ask any questions. Perfect. She was a bit stiff whenever Kylo was in the room, it amused you. You had been the same after all. Now you were far less comfortable whenever he was NOT around than when he was.
"I'll leave you two alone.", Kylo said and was almost out of the door as you grabbed his hand and stopped him from leaving.
"Don't get too pissed at Hux... I know you have another meeting with him. He is not worth the trouble.", you said quietly, still holding onto his hand.
He sighed and scratched his head, "I don't even know why I still keep him around."
"Amusement. He is entertaining sometimes.", you smiled and squeezed his hand lightly before letting it go. Kylo nodded and left reluctantly. He had really pulled himself together at the meeting this morning, you didn't know how well he would manage now. Eh. It was just Hux. If he'd lose his head who actually cared?
The body double let out a sigh of relief once Kylo had left.
"He is so intimidating. I get cold whenever I am around him... Around you too! But only slightly"
You just nodded. Did she have to talk that much now? Apparently you had been wrong in assuming that she was the quiet and stern type. Hopefully she was not as talkative as Rosie was.
"He is more handsome than I thought though...", she had an odd look on her face. No matter what it meant, you did not like it, "You two seem to get along nicely.", the look didn't fade. In fact it seemed to get worse. Why was she pulling a face like that? Were you just incapable of reading expressions now or did your brain not WANT to read it?
Not as distant as you had thought in the beginning. Dammit. Only one way to find out whether or not you could get her to keep her distance...
"We do.", you took a deep breath, "Anyway. When you are running around as Vornskr. Only talk when talked to. No different from how it should already be right now", you paused briefly, letting your words sink in,"and keep your sentences to a minimum. Do not talk about your powers and if someone bothers you, do not threaten to use the Force on them. Because you can't. Resort to physical violence if you must but mostly just ignore any threats."
She nodded, a bit taken away by how commanding your tone was. Good. You did not want her to pry into your personal relationship with Kylo. That was yours, and yours alone. No one else had a right to be in it.
"About the Knights. Trudgen is a good guy, he is the strongest...he is not the smartest but never get into a physical fight with him because you WILL lose. Vicrul is fine, so is Ap'lek. No matter what happens you can always go to him if there is an issue. He is the most mature out of all of them. Kuruk is usually quiet. If you can, ignore both Ushar and Cardo. They are utterly annoying and... ", you stopped to make sure she had understood everything you had said, only continuing after she had given you a nod,"if either of them ask about my relationship with Kylo tell them to shut up. Of course... That is a rather delicate matter to begin with. No matter who is asking you will not say anything about it. Do you understand?"
She nodded, "Vornskr's relationship or MD-2442's?"
"Either. There is no one in the whole galaxy you will talk to about it. If you do... I will make you wish you were never born."
You could hear her gulp. Good. You were satisfied with yourself. Power was such a nice thing to have... its beauty was underestimated by everyone who did not have it. You really had to watch out so you would not go insane. Going back to working with the officers perhaps wasn't such a bad idea, it'd keep your ego in check.
Satisfied with what you had accomplished you nodded, "Alright. Let's go meet the others then. You go get dressed up as Vornskr, I will get out of my Vornskr outfit and put on my doctor's uniform."
"Yes, Ma'am."
On your way to the gym you took the heavy traffic hallways on purpose, after all you had to be seen together. The looks they gave her were incredibly amusing. Scared and curious at the same time. You couldn't help but get a bit envious that you weren't the one wearing the outfit right now.
Escyle and Rosie passed you and you gave her pale face a quick nod. Right, you still had to meet up with her. You made a mental note to not forget later.
The introduction went fine, your body double was stiff and it didn't get much better, but she took the jokes from the others rather well. A positive sign and it would make it easier for her in the future. You wrote a quick message to Rosie that you could meet her in two days, it was also when you would start working again. She almost immediately wrote back an entire novel, mostly asking about the new Knight. You skimmed through it and just replied with a simple: 'in two days'. You couldn't blame her you would have been as surprised and curious if you wouldn't be this close with the Knights.
Training itself wasn't anything special. Just like any other, with the small difference that you also discussed strategies for the upcoming mission. Vicrul would accompany you, instead of Ap'lek because he was still inexperienced with the Force. So you would not have to concentrate as much to limit his connection.
Vicrul was everything but keen on getting massive headaches and even less keen to accompany you after you threatened to kill him if he should screw it up. He didn't really have much say in the matter however. He had been chosen and he had to leave with you.
Cardo insisted that the headaches couldn't possibly be that bad and dared you to cut him off. You didn't, just limited his connection. He took it surprisingly well. He showed the same signs Ap'lek had last time, slowed reflexes... General uncomfort, nausea ...you documented it carefully. However he did not get a headache. Until you cut him off and he fainted. Ushar was incredibly happy to play around with his unconscious body and placed it in all sorts of positions before Trudgen stopped him.
His complaining afterwards could not have been worse. He kept on whining about how much his head hurt, how he felt weak and how mean you had been for actually following through. He also joked about Kylo being a masochist, that joke did not get very far though because Trudgen hit him. Ushar wanted to continue the joke, but got hit as well. Then both of them complained about the pain. You could have sworn they were siblings from how similar they were sometimes.
The rest of the afternoon went by in the blink of an eye and you returned to your room, not the new one. The old one. The small chamber attached to Kylos medbay. 2nd Vornskr and you had agreed that she would use the chambers instead of you. She didn't ask why you did not want them.
Every time she'd leave or run around in her mask she'd alert you. That way there wouldn't be two Vornskrs. Trudgen had offered to train her, and she happily agreed. They had set training times which made it far easier to keep track.
You pulled the carbon fiber box, one of the two boxes of personal belongings, out from under your bed and carried it over to Kylo's apartment.
Would he mind you cleaning your weapon on his desk? Probably not. Apart from that, your own room was too small and the medbay was not suited. Theoretically you could clean it there but sterilising the place afterwards would be horrible. Not even talking about the oil stains you would leave.
You opened the box and took out the parts of your sniper rifle. It was custom made by an engineer, who had crafted it for your father. It was also the only thing you still had left of him. The last time it had been used to kill resistance fighters. It had also been the first time you had used it instead of your father. Now it would not be much different, it was an instrument against the Resistance. Your father had used it to kill Vornskr, now Vornskr would use it to kill instead. Strangely fitting.
Cleaning weapons was usually rather tedious but you enjoyed it. It was a mindless activity, almost meditative. Taking the rifle apart into its smallest components and carefully removing any dust and debris... it didn't exactly require much brain power but it was what you enjoyed. Occasionally. Seeing each of the parts neatly placed next to each other after you were done was incredibly satisfying and made the boring parts of cleaning worth it.
"Is that your personal rifle?", a voice sounded from behind you and turned around quickly to see Kylo standing in the doorway. How had he managed to sneak up on you like that?! Apparently you had been too lost in thoughts.
You nodded and put it back together, it took you less than 10 seconds. Great. You were still able to do it! It had always been a sport between you and your dad to see who could do it faster. He had won every time, but you had always been close behind him. You wondered which of you two would win now...
"It's from my father. I am going to use it tomorrow."
He made a 'mhhh' sound and placed a hand on your shoulder briefly before walking towards the conference room: "I will get dinner, can you set the table?"
"Of course.", you quickly placed the rifle back into its case and prepared the table. Kylo was tense. He had been quiet at lunch already but he didn't say a single word during dinner. He also did not try to get into your head, he just quietly munched on his food and got ready for bed immediately after you had both finished.
You slipped into your pyjamas yourself and went back to Kylos room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on his knees to support his weight, and stared at the carbon fiber box that was sitting in the corner.
Not being able to read other peoples' thoughts was irrelevant, you knew exactly what he was thinking. Knowing him, he would not want to admit to it though. Alright. That's just how he was. You could deal with it.
He did not want you to leave. He was worried that you would disappear in the same way you had before. Or that you'd get captured or in the worst case... die. It was written clearly over his face. He had his eyebrows pulled together slightly, probably wondering if there was any other way. There wasn't. Both of you knew that.
You sat down next to him, watching him for a short while before speaking up.
"We have come a long way, haven't we?", you said quietly and pulled your legs towards your body, hugging your knees.
He turned his head towards you, his torso still leaning forward, elbows on his knees.
You chuckled quietly, "I mean the first time I came here I took care of you...", you looked at the scars on the side of his torso, "now you take care of me..."
He didn't reply anything, just watched every single one of your movements very carefully. He had watched you like that in the beginning as well, mostly because he hadn't been sure how much he could trust you. Now he looked at you in a different way, but you couldn't exactly pinpoint it.
"Now I am a Knight and you are my Medic.", you grinned and lightly punched his shoulder, trying to get him to smile as well. He didn't. His face remained as uncomfortable and worried as it had been. It pained you to see him this way. You wanted to tell him that it was all going to be fine, that you would come back safely... but you knew that he wouldn't hear any of it.
You squeezed his shoulder briefly but didn't remove your hand. His skin was smooth and soft. Not rough as you would have expected from someone that fought so much. A smile appeared on your face as you thought back to the first time you had been to his Chambers. You had reacted very similar to your body double. Intimidated. Then again... Not quite like that either, given you had scolded him for not watching out.
"It's still so weird to me that I am a Knight. By now I have come to terms with knowing the Supreme Leader this close but... sometimes it still is unreal.", you absentmindedly started tracing the outline of the muscles on his shoulders, "I just hope I will match you in-"
The sound of an incoming transmission interrupted you. Why was your hand on his shoulder? You quickly pulled it back and fetched Kylos datapad, sufficiently hiding your face burning up. What were you thinking? Just touching the supreme fucking leader like that? You really had to pull yourself together.
As you handed the datapad to him you could see the faintest of smiles appearing before it was replaced by a worried frown.
"You have to leave now. We fear your target might disappear otherwise.", he threw the datapad behind him onto the bed and got up, "I'll alert Vicrul, you go get dressed."
You nodded and sprinted over towards your new room, quickly slipping into Vornskr's outfit. This was inconvenient...you did not want to leave Kylo now, could they not have called five minutes later? Or not at all? Was that an option? Why did you have to be a Knight... if you were a plain old Medic you would not have been called away like that.
He was already waiting for you, holding your rifle and mask.
"You can sleep during the flight, Vicrul is on his way over. Here...", he handed you your own datapad, "are the mission details. Very few things have changed, it should not be a problem. And... Here is your rifle.", he put the belt over your head, so you could carry it across your back.
He looked at you for a short while, putting a strand of hair behind your ear. His face was as worried as it had been before. Perhaps more so. His dark eyes somehow made it seem much worse. He let out a sigh and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a hug. You could feel the blood rushing into your face again, as he pressed it against his bare chest.
"Come back.", he said quietly and loosened his grip, allowing you to move away. You didn't. Instead you hugged him back and closed your eyes, taking in the sensation. He tightened his grip again and for a few seconds you just stood there in a silent embrace. Neither of you dared to say a word.
Since you were back from Weih, you had not been apart from each other for longer than half a day at most. He had done everything in his power to keep it that way as well. Both of you enjoyed each others company more than anyone else's, and neither wanted to admit it.
You could hear the door to the conference room open and quickly let go of Kylo. He put the mask on your head and secured it properly. It was strangely similar to when he had to leave for Weih...you just hoped he wouldn't be missing after you came back.
"You know what you have to do. Do not get caught.", he straightened the fabric on your shoulders.
"Never. I evaded the First Order for three weeks. The Resistance does not stand a chance!", you joked and Kylo let out an exasperated sigh. He did not like you bringing up Weih at all.
"Do not remind me. Come back.", he said and nodded towards Vicrul who was standing in the doorway.
"I'll see you tomorrow evening. No worries. He's more or less dead.", you said with confidence and grinned widely under your mask.
"I know."
Annotation:
Thank you all for being so patient with me! Exams are coming up and I barely find any time to write...I am sorry for that :/