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P.S: I've seen your comments and all you guys don't want Rhea to die and that you guys want Rhea and Amy. No one wants Rhea and Bridget to hook up ;/ lolol Darn it! >.<! Well, you guys gotta keep reading and one thing's for sure: ALTERNATIVE ENDING WOULD BE INCLUDED!
P.P.S: Please read the note at the end. To give you a hint, it talks about the ending of the book ;/
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Broken Hearts & Lonely Stars:
Chapter Twenty One: An Angel's Mending
"Rhea? Are you ready?" My mother's voice was heard behind the door as I sighed before looking back at the video camera that was perched on the tripod. The red light blinking telling me it was still recording. I smiled at the camera before quickly turning it off and put the camcorder and the tripod away.
"Yeah, I just need to put on my shoes," I replied, slipping on my boots.
"We'll be in the car," my mother told me and her retreating footsteps faded.
I sat on the edge of my bed, slowly coming to the realization that my life had taken a huge turn in events. To think I'll die unloved and unwanted had vanished from my mind when I see the people doing their best for me to live. But can they still try to keep someone living when they're prepared to die? I'm not much of a suicidal person but in my years of being neglected, broken, and unhappy made me realize one thing:
I have to cherish every minute before the time runs out.
Persistent that I am, I would charge forward, trying my best to keep the promises I made even though those who gave up on hoping for me to fulfill it aren't much behind me. I let down too many people its time to change that.
I stood up from my bed, fixing my beanie as I walked out of my room only to stop and gape at the woman in front of me. Her golden brown hair fell in perfect waves over her slim shoulders, framing her oval face. She wore a familiar Led Zeppelin shirt and leggings with a pair of black Chucks. Chocolate brown eyes gazed back at me with a twinge of happiness in them. Her coated red lips twitched into a small smile before biting her bottom lip.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, shocked to my bones to see her here.
Those chocolate brown eyes widened, surprised. Maybe because I didn't snap at her instead I spoke softly as if she was a fragile flower, too delicate in my hands. One wrong move and she'll break.
"I... Umm, I came to talk to you," she bit her lip again.
My eyes zeroed on that lip biting, slowly becoming transfixed into that I didn't realize I took a step forward, making our bodies almost touching. Almost.
"About what?" I whispered, my body having a mind on its own as my hand flew to cup her chin, my thumb tracing her jaw line.
I could hear the small intake of breath from her and knowing my touches still bring reactions from her brought a small smirk to my lips.
"I'm sorry, Rhea," she begun, cupping my hand in hers as she leaned into my touch further. "For everything that I've done and hadn't done. I wish I could go back in time and change everything. If I was given a chance to change my past, I would change the day I cheated on you. I love you, Rhea. I'm never gonna forget the times we spent together, the kisses we shared, and the memorable sweet compliments you whispered to me in secret before you became the heartless girl everyone knew you as once you stepped out into the world. I miss you. The real you, Rhea... I understand you don't believe me--"
"I believe you," I admitted softly, gazing deep into those chocolate brown eyes. A smile appeared on her red lips. "But I'm not ready for another heart ache, Bridget."
My confession surprised her, I could tell. The way she stepped back hastily letting my hand fall to my side. As if my confession wasn't what she wanted to hear. She wanted everything to go back to normal. To relish in the past events when we were together. She wanted me to be at her side and make her believe everything would be the same but the truth is, it wouldn't. It would never be the same. I know the guilt was haunting her and she regrets every minute of it but as for me, this was my life where I charge forward not cower backwards. I didn't want to bring my past to the present where I only had little bit of time to fix everything that needed to be fixed.
To be friends with this woman was something I didn't want but to have good karma for once in my life, I had to befriend her even if it's something she doesn't want. I don't want to wait for her phone call and tell me she loves me more than anyone she's been with. I don't want to wait for her text messages where her words may come out as lies. That was four years ago when I was a broken hearted fool. I'm not going to embrace that.
I took my hand out, giving her a reassuring smile as I said, "Friends?"
She gaped at me in complete and utter shock.
Yes, this heartless bitch was finally giving chances to those who deserve it. Maybe it was shocking to see me smile without it being fake. Maybe my cold exterior was melting all the way. Maybe I was finally having a heart.
"I-I..." She shut her mouth, her stuttering making my smile grow into a grin.
"You don't have to agree but at least know this, Bridget," I leaned forward, my cheek skimming against hers as my lips rested on her ear. I could hear the sudden intake of her breath which brought a secretive smile to my face. "I forgive you and I rather have you as my friend than an enemy at this moment. Trust me, you wouldn't want to be my enemy," I chuckled and stepped back, giving her another smile.
Finally, she smiled back and surprised me when she threw her arms around me and hugged me. I was never a hugging a type but something inside of me wanted to get as much hugs as possible so I wounded my arms around he waist and hugged her tightly. It would be difficult to be her friend. Letting your first love go was the hardest thing to do. Even if they broke your heart, you would always have feelings for that person. For me, seeing a future of Bridget loving someone else would tear a little at my heart but as long as she's happy, it would suit well with me.
I may be stupid to still have feelings for her but know this, everyone would always have feelings for their first love even if they don't admit it.
The hug ended by the sudden honk from outside. I sighed and stepped aside, meeting those chocolate brown eyes I once gazed before with love. Now, it was mere friendship.
"I have to go," I told her quietly.
She nodded, "Where you going?"
I smirked, "I don't want a stalker in my hands, Bridget, but if you so obsessively want to know, I have an appointment."
"Oh," was all she said.
One simple word full of understanding.
Who knew another simple, foreign word would bring me to the verge of giving all my best in this battle...
* * * *
( TWO DAYS LATER )
"You're sure you don't want to go?"
I nodded, tearing my eyes away from the TV to my beautiful mother standing near the end of the couch, holding her black coat in her arms. She looked elegant with her navy blue, sleeveless dress that flowed to her knees yet hugged her waist. It covered her torso like a blanket yet dipped down into a 'V' in the back. Sophisticated yet sexy. As much as it disturbed me to think of my mother as a ravishing woman, she would always be beautiful to my eyes. Even if she was wrinkled and saggy boobed.
I could tell that she wanted me to accompany them to Amy's party which her father threw her for finishing chemo but I couldn't face her again. I simply broke that flower for being stubborn and hopeless to these feelings that were blooming inside of me. Before, these feelings were meant for Bridget but after become a lot colder and heartless, I don't know what to do with these feelings. I was a complicated girl. I wouldn't even date myself for that matter.
"Okay, well, there's leftover of the Chinese food we ate earlier in the fridge," she told me, slipping her arms through her black coat before grabbing her purse. "Your father left you sixty dollars if you want to order anything. Please, sweetie, don't let us find you high or drunk."
I sighed heavily, dropping my head back against the couch. "I'm not, Mom."
"You better, kid," my father's authoritative voice rang in my ears as a light slap hit my forehead. Navy blue eyes stared down at me, a hint of a smile on his lips. "We're taking Lilly so you can rest. Your mother's going to call you like around nine to check up on you. Got it?"
"Got it," I smiled back as my mother came around the back of the couch and kissed my forehead before grabbing Lilly's hand and walked out the front door.
My father lingered there for a moment, gazing at the screen of the television, his eyes glazed over in thought. For a brief second, I wanted to snap him out of his daze and see if this man who was my father would split his personality and become the bastard he once was but when those navy blue eyes drifted to mine, a warm, genuine smile brightened his features. The man he was before had vanished. The father I wanted to love me and show affection to me everyday was standing there within my grasp.
In a quick motion, he pulled my beanie over my face, chuckling, "We'll be back before eleven."
"You jerk!" I laughed with him, taking off my beanie. "Leave already and let me be in peace!"
"Okay, okay!" He chuckled as he grabbed his coat and approached the front door. Before he stepped foot outside, he looked over his shoulder at me and said, "I blocked all Showtime channels. I want your eyes virgin from seeing any adult shows." He snickered and closed the door behind him.
I rolled my eyes and gazed back at the TV. Images of gray eyes burned my mind. Tears running down her freckled cheeks as she gazed back at me with such raw emotions in those gray eyes. In my mind, I wasn't that cold to turn my back on her. Instead, I pulled her into an embrace, loving the feel of having her this close. The way her delicate body fit perfectly against mine. Just having her within my reach felt so...vivid.
I sighed, changing the channel. Tosh. 0 suddenly appeared and entertained me quickly yet my mind won't let me be with these images filled with Amy and the 'what ifs'. I didn't want to hurt her and being me, I hurt anyone that came my way. Look at my brother for an example. I broke the one promise I've given him to hold onto and in the end, I lost his trust.
"Why do I have to be such a heartless bitch?" I groaned as I stood up and walked to the kitchen.
I saw the sixty dollars on the counter but I ignored them. After the whole head bashing 'incident', my dad hid his liquor in his studies which was kept locked every day and night. But oddly, I wasn't craving for a shot of hard liquor nor beer. Instead, my body was itching for something. As if my body was a junkie going through cold turkey and its only addiction it craved right now wasn't here. I opened the fridge to see nothing that I wanted to munch. I was still full from the Chinese food so I got a can of soda and a box of Chips Ahoy! from the cabinet and walked back to the living room.
Drinking soda, munching on cookies, and watching Tosh. 0 was basically my Friday night. Memories of the nights I spent outside, roaming the streets with hooligans, not giving a damn about my life seemed so far away. Now, I wanted to be in my house and be the lazy bum I always am.
Just as I was about to savor the chocolate chip cookie in my mouth, the doorbell rang. I glared at the TV screen where it said '8:45 pm' on the top right corner. Who in the Hell would be bothering me? It wouldn't be my parents because they're those people who check their pockets and purse and see if they have everything they needed and if they forgot something they would bug the crap out of me in making me drive to where they were only to bring their missing and oh so important item.
The doorbell incensingly rang again.
I groaned out loud and got to my feet, stomping my way towards the front door. This person better have a good ass reason.
I swung open the door only to be frozen in place.
"Aren't you going to let me in?" Annoyance leaked out of her melodic voice.
My gaze hardened and I perched myself against the threshold, crossing my arms. The breeze blew, making self conscious that I wasn't wearing my beanie and my bald head was shown to everyone and any nosy neighbor peeking through their curtains. "For what? Shouldn't you be at your party, princess?"
She glared yet those gray orbs held no anger yet a twinge of sadness, "I invited your family to my party--"
"And they're at your party. If you're that blind, I could give them a call--"
"I mean, I invited your family to my party which includes you as well, Rhea," she snapped, firmly, placing her hands on her curved waist.
I pursed my lips for a bit, "Nah. Your party is probably boring as hell and if you haven't noticed, I go to parties where booze and drugs are the main events."
"Yet you're here," she plainly stated and I stayed quiet, my eyes narrowing on her.
It was quiet for a moment and I took that to look her over. She looked beautiful with the moonlight giving her a milky glow to her skin, outlining her curved, slim body. She was wearing a black, satin dress that reached above her knees yet hugged all the right places. It covered her torso, sadly, but the way her red wig seemed to flow down her slim shoulders in perfect waves made her more elegant than the girls I've dated and slept with.
"You didn't answer my question," I told her softly. "Shouldn't you be at your party instead of here?"
She bit her bottom lip hesitantly, her gray eyes lowered and stared at my naked arms, legs, upper torso where my tattoos were fully shown. Especially the tattoo no one knew about even my dad yet I was surprised he didn't comment on it earlier.
I was only wearing a black wife beater and basketball shorts with TOMS. Something hardly no one saw me in.
"I don't want to be there," she admitted, bringing back her gaze to me.
"Where you want to be then?" I pushed.
"I want to be with you--"
I didn't hesitate as I dove in and captured her lips with mine. I didn't want to waste time into confessing feelings for each other. So, I pulled her to me, wrapping my arms around her waist as I felt her hands glide up my arms only to wound around my neck. Our lips moved in sync. A perfect harmony. I could feel her heartbeat pounding in her chest as I licked her bottom lip, begging for entrance. She gasped and I barged in, my tongue dancing with hers. Without breaking the kiss, I guided her up the stairs to my room where she pulled back and watched me intently. Her lips were swollen and pink as those gray orbs were filled with such passion, I just wanted to dive back in.
I closed the door and approached her, cupping her cheek in my hand. So fragile that she was, I was afraid to hurt her. I would be a monster to hurt this girl with a heart of gold.
"I'm complicated," I whispered to her, keeping my gaze locked with hers.
"Then, I'll help you get untangled," she responded with such confidence in her voice, it was like a sweet reassurance to my dark abyss.
"I could hurt you so many ways that I would lose you."
"You have some good in your heart, Rhea. Never forget that," Amy smiled, her gray eyes twinkling.
"You'll still be here after everything I've done to you?" I asked, slightly confused. "The door's wide open for you to leave and forget this ever happened."
"I'm not gonna leave, Rhea," she sternly said, gripping my shoulders. "I'm gonna be by your side until you wish me to leave. I'll aid you until the pain you feel is no more. I'll wipe away your silent tears and kiss your scars. I don't want to leave. Not now, not ever."
"You promise?"
"I promise," she confirmed and with that, I kissed her. Deeply and passionately.
I kissed her like an addict getting their fill. To say I felt tingles rushing from my fingertips and up my arms would be cliche when I kissed her. I didn't feel fireworks like most put it. What I felt was something I longed for. It was something that gave me more hope into fighting this cancer.
I felt...loved.
For the first time, I felt like I was important to someone. Valuable to their eyes. With that set in mind, something inside of me was pounding with such joy I never felt it before. The iceberg that rested in my chest had finally melted and my fragile still mending heart was beating. Beating for the girl that was molded perfectly in my arms.
Amy pulled away from the kiss, catching some air yet my lips attacked her neck. Sucking and biting, I loved the sweet, soft moans eliciting in the air. I unzipped her dress from the side and took it off, guiding her to the bed where she plopped onto it. She looked beautiful laying on my bed in just bra and panties. Her curved yet slim body was beautiful. My eyes zeroed on her forearms where scars were visible on her milky skin.
All the confidence that she had faded and she wrapped her arms around her, hiding the evidence of her cutting away from my questioning gaze. I brought my eyes to those gray orbs where held disgust.
"I know," she whispered. "I hate that part of my body. It's disgusting to look at. You don't have to tell me--"
"No," I firmly said, grabbing her wrist and exposing her forearm where the faint scars decorated her skin. Hesitantly, I traced one of the scars close to the base of her palm, feeling the faint line where once a blade sliced through her beautiful skin.
"You probably don't want to even see me anymore nor talk to me," she blinked repeatedly yet a tear escaped. She turned her head to the side as more tears fell and I finally saw this fragile flower break over the thoughts haunting her mind.
I smiled softly and raised her wrist to my lips, kissing her scars individually and passionately. "I would never stop talking to you. I would never be disgusted by you just for this. Instead, I would kiss your scars, each and every one of them, hoping it fills the emptiness you feel inside. I would remind you that you're beautiful even with these scars. I would punch those who disagrees if I have to." With that said, I kissed her last scar on her arm before smiling down at her.
"I made a right choice in coming here," she grinned and brought my head towards where our lips met once more.
To think this girl had changed me was still shocking.
Who knew Rhea Daniels, the heartless girl who played with so many hearts yet got herself broken, was finally free from the cage she put herself through.
I was not unwanted because my family and friends were here with me through my darkest hours.
I was not unloved because I finally saw the love in my father's eyes which I wished to see for once and the girl underneath me gazed back at me with such love, I knew I was never unloved in the first place.
To say I would die unloved and unwanted or as a disgrace was foolish for me to think.
I wasn't a disgrace.
I wasn't unwanted or unloved.
I, Rhea Daniels, would never be alone.
I promise you that.
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;)))
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So, my time's running out for the Watty's. To say this would be the end might be the mild truth. I have my midterms on Monday and Wednesday and I gotta study, study, study. If I have the chance, I'll put up another chapter this weekend or before the deadline. But as of now, this would be the end until the Watty's are finished.
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