Ace's POV:
I was writing in my journal after killing the woman to get some things off my mind .
7/12/30
Today I killed a woman . She wasn't like every other ordinary woman but she was a women nonetheless . She even tried to plot with her husband to kill me , probably for money so that they could attempt to get out of their drug debt more than likely .
But a lot of people don't know that once you're in the Mafia , there's no way out . And the only way out is to be hunted forever . I was born into this lifestyle so I had no choice . I had to grow and adapt to live in this environment and just to survive. I thrive because I feel nothing . Well ..... felt . Past tense .
I was hesitant to kill the woman today. Very hesitant . I didn't show it though , I'm not really good at showing emotion anyways. I think I was hesitant because I keep thinking 'what if it was Sofia' . What if Sofia is in that exact same position. What if she gets kidnapped by a person like me or Haze . We would kill her with no second thought .
So , I hesitated ever so slightly. And it almost killed me . I almost died because I was going to be good for once and spare the wife , to try and change . For my girl . But that didn't work . Maybe if I keep trying , eventually I'll just become naturally good at being kind . I want to become good for her. She's my light and I don't want to infect her with darkness .
I want to grow to become a better man for our future kids . I want to be worthy enough to be the father of her kids . Without her I have no purpose , no home , nothing . Im falling for her and it's scary . It's scary how much control she has over me . I'd do anything for her , even give my own life . It worries me because I don't know if she feels the same .
I desperately want her to . I know the effects I have over her , but that's physical. I want something emotional for once . Someone I can lean on when times get tough and for her to trust me to protect and love her like I want to .
I'm not seeing people as objects anymore and that's thanks to her .
It scares me because if she heard even half of the things I've done , she would think I'm a monster . Especially if she seen me doing it to people . Burning them until their bones turn black . Breaking bones and letting them heal only to break them again .
I'm afraid my past will catch up and destroy us . Everyone in the Mafia business wants me dead. Firstly for killing their men , and secondly because I own the biggest Mafia in the world .
My father made it impossible for me to be kind to anyone . He made me selfish and cruel . But she's undoing what he did . She's taking the bad parts and making them good . Sofia's changing my world . ~ Ace .
I closed my journal and slipped it back under my pillow. I sighed releasing all my built up tension and anger . I can't wait to go home . Hopefully she's not asleep by the time I get home. I still have a few more people to talk to .
I got off my bed with a groan and walked back into the base .
As I was walking down the hall , Dante found me . "Raul Diaz is now the official leader of his Mafia" Dante informed me , reading off of a sheet . Sofia's brother took over their families Mafia . "Atleast that bastard won't be able to hurt her anymore" I spoke angrily just thinking about Sofia's father .
"Ace , we really need to have your mothers funeral" Dante suggested to me , trying to persuade me . "No" I snapped instantly at him . "Her body is in the morgue and it's been there for ages" Dante sighed hinting for me to do something about it.
"Fine , tomorrow" I rolled my eyes. "Tomorrow?" Dante said shocked . "Yeah , it's the only day I have off" I growled angrily because I wanted to spend it with Sofia . "Ok then , tomorrow it is" Dante nodded agreeing with me. "What's tomorrow" Ice asked walking by . "Ace's mom's funeral" Dante uttered writing down things on his notepad while strolling down the hall next to me . "I'll get the word out" Ice gave Dante a thumbs up continuing to walk in the opposite direction . Dante gave him a thumbs up in response .
"Are you allowing your father to come?" Dante asked not even realising what he had just said. I grabbed Dante's throat and squeezed my hand . "Do you think I'd let that fucking murder come to her funeral" I spat at Dante who grabbed my wrist to try and break my grip on his throat . "I didn't think" Dante struggled to say . I gritted my teeth before dropping him .
Dante gasped for breath as soon as I released him . "I'm sorry" he muttered , his hands resting on his knees to hold himself up . I didn't respond because I was angry .
"Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you" Dante said imbetween breaths.
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