▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃
"One more chapter, please." Caroline's puppy dog eyes settled on Ryan. "I like it when you read. Your voices are funnier than Momma's."
Ryan's heart swelled a little, not even caring that she was probably only telling him that to stall the inevitable going to bed. "I've already read five chapters." He smoothed her hair. "It's time for you to go to bed."
Caroline's lips plumped into a pout. "I don't want you to go. I missed you."
A flash of guilt hit Ryan -- a misunderstanding, a moment of rashness had caused him to lose a week of time with Caroline. "I missed you too. But I'll see you again really soon but you have to go to sleep."
Caroline nodded slowly. "Love you, Ryan." She murmured.
Ryan leaned forward and kissed her forehead, wondering if his heart could literally explode from the flood of happiness that was assaulting him. He wasn't sure he'd ever hear Caroline tell him that and certainly not unprompted.
All of the pain, the hurt, and broken parts that he was sifting through were worth it -- so worth it to hear those words. He ached to tell her the truth but he knew that Lydia was right, Caroline deserved him at his best and that was going to take time. But Caroline telling him that she loved him? That would power him through.
"I love you too. Goodnight, Caroline." Ryan stood up, quickly shutting the door. He quickly bounded down the steps, eager to tell Lydia what had happened.
Lydia -- she had looked so damn angelic while sleeping that it had killed him to wake her up. The flustered look on her face, the way she had been avoiding eye contact with him had made him so nervous to the point he neared a panic attack. When she confessed -- or at least implied -- that she had had a sex dream about him, Ryan had nearly fallen on the floor.
Sure, he still had dreams about her -- about their night together -- but he had always chalked it off to a safe place for his mind to escape. It had never crossed his mind that she had those dreams too.
A tiny piece of Ryan hoped that maybe that meant she'd be open to a physical relationship with him. It was stupid, probably reckless but after their kiss, he craved her touch.
He was touch starved and it was starting to drive him crazy. That's all it was -- it had to be. If Ryan was thinking right, he would know that having sex with Lydia was probably a terrible idea and besides, she didn't want him. He'd just have to settle with whoever he met at the first bar he found to satisfy this sudden urge.
As Ryan descended the stairs, his eyes fell on Lydia. She was playing a game on her phone -- her dark bangs falling in her face, her brow furrowed in concentration. Ryan's heart rate sped up a little. Time had made Lydia even more beautiful.
"Somehow one chapter turned into five." Ryan broke the silence once he stepped off the last step.
Lydia looked up from her phone with a grin that nearly knocked Ryan over. "She is a master at that."
"She told me that she loved me." Ryan rocked on his heels. "That felt amazing."
"That's great." Lydia held her grin. "She really does love you. She was ecstatic when I told her you were coming for dinner."
Ryan nodded, chewing on his lip as he made his way towards the couch towards Lydia. He had half a mind to say something to Lydia about earlier, to try and gauge what she might think about having sex with him but he bit his tongue. The last thing he wanted to do was make things awkward or even worse -- make her uncomfortable.
"So about earlier," he paused, letting out an awkward laugh.
Lydia's face flushed a bright red, "I'm sorry about that."
"You don't have to be," Ryan reassured her. "Was it the night we met?" When Lydia nodded, Ryan nodded too. "I still dream about that night too."
Lydia scrunched her nose in surprise. "Really?"
Ryan laughed a little. If only Lydia had any clue how much he had dreamt and relived that night. "Of course I still dream about one of the best nights of my life." Lydia's eyes lifted to meet Ryan's and he could practically hear what she was about to say next so he quickly added. "And I counted that night — our night — as one of the best nights before I ever knew about Caroline."
Ryan moved closer. He wasn't sure if he should tell Lydia about how their one night together had been his retreat from the hell of Stacy but he found himself spilling his guts to her — it was so easy for Ryan to do that.
"When things would get bad with Stacy, my mind would take me back to that night and replay it for me. Sometimes it'd expand into wondering where you were or what things might've been like if I had gotten your number but yeah... That night was my happy place." He explained, searching Lydia's face for any indication of what she was thinking.
"It was mine too." Lydia's eyes fell to her lap. "Any time I had a nightmare, I'd think about our night together. Focusing on that helped me get past what I needed to get past."
Ryan wanted to ask her to elaborate but she didn't push him so he knew he had to give that to her too. He had a feeling she would tell him when she was ready and he was okay with that.
"What if we did it again?" Ryan blurted, the tender moment was gone.
Lydia's eyes snapped up to meet Ryan's, her eyebrow arched. "What?"
Ryan let out a nervous laugh as he tried to find a way to make what he was about to suggest less reckless as it was. But he couldn't, so he let out a sigh. "Forget it." He mumbled. "I should probably get going."
Ryan stood up, kicking himself for ruining the conversation. There was no way Lydia would want to have sex with him, she knew first hand the baggage he carried and the last thing she wanted was to get any more involved with him than she already was.
"No, wait." Lydia grabbed his hand, turning him back towards her. She chewed on her lip for a minute. "Would sex complicate your recovery from your relationship with Stacy?"
Ryan shook his head. "Honestly, Lydia — If we don't have sex tonight, I'll probably end up at a bar and in bed with the first person that I find. I don't want to guilt you but if it's going to be anybody, I'd rather it be you."
"There's just one thing." Lydia's eyes drifted from his, almost like she was embarrassed. "I don't look the same as I did the first time we had sex. I never quite lost all of the baby weight and I have stretch mark scars and —"
"Hey." Ryan stopped her, moving close enough that he could reach out and tip her head so she was looking at him again. "All of that is because you grew our daughter inside your body for nine months and even if you hadn't, it still wouldn't matter. It was never your body that I craved, that wasn't what got me through Stacy's abuse — it was the connection that we had. That we still have."
Lydia nodded slowly but didn't say anything so Ryan took that as his cue to kiss her. He leaned forward, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss started out sweetly but quickly turned into a hungrier kiss. Ryan's hands gripped Lydia's hips, tugging her closer to him so all of her was pressing against him.
"Wait." Lydia pulled back, resting her hands on Ryan's chest. He hoped she couldn't feel the way his heart was thumping from panic that she had stopped. He was afraid that she would have second thoughts. "We should probably go up to my room so Caro doesn't walk in on us..." Her voice trailed off, a small smile on her face. "Come on."
Her fingers intertwined with Ryan's as she led him up the stairs. She stepped inside of what he assumed was her bedroom. Once he was safely inside, she swung the door shut, pressing the lock in the door handle.
When Lydia turned back to Ryan, he could see the lust in her eyes. He could feel the fabric of his jeans getting a little tight in the crotch area -- this is what she did to him without even trying.
He closed the distance between them, pressing another kiss to her lips. Ryan deepened the kiss, prodding her lips open with his tongue. Their tongues tangled, fighting for dominance as Lydia's hand tangled in his hair.
She tugged his hair a little, eliciting a groan from Ryan. He didn't know he was into hair-pulling but apparently, he was.
Ryan gripped her hips, tugging her towards the bed. He sat down -- Lydia straddling his hips. Ryan tugged at the hem of her shirt, lifting it up and discarding it onto the floor. She sucked in a breath -- no doubt waiting for Ryan's approval.
If she hadn't warned him, Ryan never would've noticed -- it wasn't important to him if her core was a little softer or stretchmark scars that poked out of the tops of her jeans. He ran his hands up her bare sides, finding the clasp on her bra. He slid her bra off her body, discarding it with her shirt.
Ryan wasted no time, his hands cupping her breasts. He leaned forward, his mouth finding one of her nipples. His tongue swirled around before he nipped the end gently, Lydia's fingers twisting in his hair in response.
"Ryan." She groaned into his ear. "I need you."
Ryan hummed in response, pulling away. Lydia slid off his lap. Ryan leaned back, watching as she slipped out of her jeans -- standing in front of him in only a pair of blue lace panties.
"Are you going to get undressed?" Lydia bit her lip, her eyes trained on him.
Ryan couldn't help but grin -- any lingering questions about if she wanted to do this faded. He pulled his shirt off, sliding his jeans off.
Ryan pulled Lydia onto the bed -- hovering over her. He leaned over, their lips connected as he pushed her panties to the side. He plunged a finger inside of her, pumping in and out a few times before he added a second finger -- his thumb finding her clit.
Lydia's back arched underneath him, her hands grabbing fistfuls of the blanket underneath her. Ryan picked up the pace until Lydia grabbed his wrist, stopping him.
"Ryan, please." Her brown eyes widened, pleading. "I can't wait any longer."
Ryan paused -- marveling at the difference between this time and their first time. The first time had been slow, each taking time to explore the other's body but this time? They needed each other this time and there was no time to waste.
But he quickly snapped into motion, pulling his boxers down. He pumped his dick a few times but he knew he was hard and ready to go. He laid on the bed, pulling Lydia on top of him.
She aligned herself before sinking onto him. She tossed her head back as she adjusted to him, Ryan's hand finding a nipple and her clit at the same time.
Lydia's hips started moving, grinding against his pubic bone at the end of each downward stroke. Ryan could barely keep his focus on her, her tightness around him, the way she was grinding down on him, it was making his head spin a little, his orgasm rapidly approaching the edge. Somehow he had to keep it at bay until Lydia was close too.
"God, Ryan." Lydia moaned, picking up the speed and intensity of her movements. "I'm close."
Ryan let out a breath of relief, he wouldn't have to hold on much longer. His mouth found her breast, rolling her nipple in between his teeth as he applied more pressure to her clit until he felt her walls clench around him.
Ryan couldn't hold himself over the edge. With a low moan, he let himself fall over the edge, riding the waves of his orgasm.
They stayed silent for a moment, both trying to catch their breath. Lydia moved first, leaning down to press a kiss on Ryan's lips before removing herself from Ryan. She slid next to him, nestling her head on his chest.
He never wanted to move, never wanted to be apart from her or Caroline for that matter. The race weekend loomed -- Talladega. The last thing he wanted to do was leave them, especially after missing the last week.
"Come to the race track with me." Ryan murmured. "You and Caroline."
Lydia's eyes widened a little. "Are you sure? I don't want people to --"
He waved her off. "Everybody is too busy being worried about the playoffs, nobody will notice. I want you guys there. I bet Caroline would love to stay in the motor home."
Lydia flashed a smile, "Okay, yeah. That'd be great."
▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃