I'm outside my mum and dad's, and I see our Layla waddling towards the gate. "Sis, wait up" I shout.
"Hey, big bro" she grins when she sees me.
"How are you doin? Nephew being good?" I ask her as we walk up our mum and dad's path.
"Alright," she smiles. "He's dropped a little now, so I can breathe a bit better"
"That's good," I say as I open the front door letting ourselves in.
"Yeah, but now it feels like he's peeking—you know? like he's right there" she groans pointing between her legs. "It's not a nice experience, Bro"
"Yeah, neither is hearing about it" I grimace.
"Well, you asked" she chuckles.
We hear Mum's voice then. "I can't find the hole"
"What do you mean, you can't find it?" Dad asks her. "Just shove it in, Annie, will ya"
What the fuck? Me and Layla mouth to each other.
"I can't fucking find it to shove it in" she growls.
"Babe, it's right there, just get it and shove it in" he growls.
"You can shove it in yourself now" she grumbles as we walk slowly towards the living room where they are.
"Fine" he huffs. "I put it in myself"
"Fine" she growls.
"Fine"
"Fine" she hisses.
"You two aren't fucking fine" Layla chuckles. "You're fucking mental" she cackles.
"Princess, what're you going on about?" Dad groans.
"I can't find the hole" I cry.
"Just shove it in, Annie" Layla growls. "What the fuck?"
Mum and Dad just stare at us before they're pissing themselves laughing. "Oh, my god, imagine if someone heard us?" She cries embarrassed.
"Ahhh, don't you worry, my queen" Dad croons. "If they didn't hear us before—they deffo heard us earlier" he chuckles wiggling his eyebrows suggestively, making Mum blush with embarrassment.
"Dad" Layla hisses, as she pretends to vomit.
"That's just—No" I groan. "I'm scarred for life" I cry dramatically.
"Delete, delete—deleeeeeeeeete" Layla cries holding her head in mock horror leaving the living room.
"Ha. Ha" Dad grunts. "Ain't you's funny?"
"I don't know why you get all weirded out anyway," Mum says rolling her eyes. "You two got here the same wa—"
"Nope, Nope—don't even finish that sentence, Ma" I groan covering my ears.
"Really?" She huffs rolling her eyes. "Your sister—"
"Ma" I shake my head. "Dad, fuck, make her stop" I groan.
"Honestly" Mum huffs rolling her eyes as she leaves the room.
Dad chuckles away reading The Echo newspaper. "Ain't nobody getting in your mum's bad books, son," he says as he turns the pages. "Besides is natural—"
"Fucking hell, not you too" I growl. "What were you's even doin?" I ask him.
"Your Ma was trying to put me tablet back on charge" he chuckles.
"Seriously?" I chuckle.
"What did I miss?" My sister appears with a plate full of food as she stuffs her face with chicken drumsticks.
"That apparently mum and dad have a buffet table in the kitchen?" I chuckle at the amount of food on her plate.
She pulls a face at me. "I was hungry, so sue me—I'm growing a human after all"
"I'm kidding, sis" I chuckle messing with her hair and making her squeal.
"Muuuuuuum, tell im' he's making me hair go frizzy" she groans. "I swear, if I end up with indigestion now, you've had it" she warns me.
"Why? What're you gonna do?" I taunt when suddenly she grabs my nipple closest to her and squeezes it hard.
"Aaaaaah, mum, mum—muuuuuuuuum, tell her" I scream. "Aaaaah, fuck, she's pinching me nipple" as she twists it.
Fuck...
"Lou" Mum shouts from where ever the fuck she is. "You're literally in the same room as them"
"Layla" Dad drawls from behind the paper. "Let your brother's nipple go"
She lets me go with a huge grin on her face. "Fuck" I groan. "Am I bleeding?" I ask looking at my nipple.
She giggles at my expression. "Stop being a pussy"
"Stop being a pussy? You almost took my goddamn nipple off" I growl. "It's gonna bruise," I say looking back at my nipple.
"It's not gonna bruise" she scoffs coming closer to examine her work. "Ooh, actually, you might be right" she tsks. "Serves you right for tormenting me"
"Being pregnant has made you evil" I grimace.
"You're such a girl" she giggles stuffing her face once again.
I open my mouth about to say Lemme twist your nipple then, but that sounds all sorts of wrong...
"What's wrong with your face, anyway?" She asks me as she sits next to Dad, Dad tries to pinch something from her plate and she growls, I mean she legit—growls, like a dog with a bone.
Dad drops the food back on her plate, looking at her like she's grown a second head. "Did you just growl at your old man?" Dad asks her.
"Did you just try and take food from a pregnant woman?" She replies. "You'd of thought you would have known not to do that shit, considering mum was pregnant twice"
"Your brother is right" Dad grumbles. "Pregnancy is making you evil"
"Go and get your own food then" Layla rolls her eyes.
"Maybe you've forgotten—you don't live here anymore, Princess?" He tells her. "So that there is my food," he tells her as he points at the plate.
"Are you telling me this isn't my home anymore?" Layla asks with a trembling lip. "You told me this would always be my home"
"Princess" Dad stutters, panic on his face. "I was kidding—of course, this will always be your home"
Her face morphs into a look of smugness as she starts stuffing her face again. "Good" she grins around a mouthful of food.
I chuckle as my dad looks at her in disbelief. "I can't believe you've just done that to your own dad," he says to her.
"Serves you right for teasing your pregnant daughter" she shrugs.
"She's got you there, babe," Mum says as she comes in with a cuppa.
I groan at the sight of my cup. "Nice one, mum"
Don't judge me, my ma's cuppas are the ONE...
"When are you due back at work?" Dad asks me.
I look at my watch, I'm due in at three so I've got time to go to the gym and then nip to Brunch to get me dinner before I start work. "Three," I tell him.
"How has Saint settled in?" Layla asks with her mouth stuffed with food which sounded more like Ow is aint ettle en. Part of growing up with Layla as a sister is that you had conversations with her while she was eating you kinda picked up on the shit she said.
"Yeah, he's sound—I can't believe he's been mates with the boss, all this time," I tell her.
She shrugs as she stuffs her face. "I'm not surprised" she laughs.
I swig off the rest of my tea, placing the cup down on the table—of course, making sure it's on a coaster because the last time I put a cup down on my ma's table, she wouldn't speak to me for a week—a fucking week...
Safe to say, I learnt my lesson. "I gotta go," I tell them. "Gonna pop the gym, then pop in to see Sharon, get me salt 'n' pepper chicken wrap," I say smacking my lips together.
Layla groans. "Oh, I love her wraps—that's not fair"
"Have you not got a plate full there?" I asked her pointing to her plate.
"Yeah, but—" she pouts.
"Get one delivered," I tell her as I kiss her forehead, before fist-bumping my arl man and kissing my mum's cheek. "Later" I shout as I shut the door behind me.
As I shut the gate after me I turn and a gorgeous woman is coming towards me, my cock, however, does nothing...
What the fuck?!
"Hey" she purrs hoping to get my attention.
"Hey" I grin as I walk past her.
Fuck—what the fuck, Luke? She was fucking practically begging for your attention!!!
It's HER!! What have you done to me, beauty?
Who are you?
WHERE are you?!