Hi everybody!
Here a new chapter for the "Mermaid of Copenhagen". It's also a new prompt, "fear", for the prompt series written by JVH624 Daphnecs8 Meggyhashope Dr-Cokebottles rainingmeteors
Enjoy!
The Mermaid of Copenhagen – part 3
Shancai was afraid.
She feared Daoming Si's intentions, what he wanted to do, and, above all, how far he could go.
But she was also scared by herself. Maybe she wasn't able to resist him, to not be strong enough or, worse, perhaps she didn't want to reject him and wished to allow herself to listen to her desires. She was overwhelmed by her feelings, and she ignored is she could stop loving him one day.
She worried about what would happen to her friend if she broke her promise to Daoming Feng. Despite what she could say and her defiance, the Daoming matriarch terrorized her, especially when she threatened her loved ones. She strongly doubted that her degree of nuisance could have some limits.
But, worst of all, her feelings were utterly conflicting. She had another fear, and it was about Daoming Si giving up, forgetting her and, mainly, stoping to love her.
Shancai already saw Daoming Si's indifferent gaze – even if, in reality, he struggled to look like that – and it was the worst of all.
She closed her eyes and dropped her head in her hands, sighing painfully.
She loved Daoming Si; she loved him more than anything. She had always been brave and strong, but now, she found herself utterly vulnerable to these new feelings. She surprised herself to dread everything, opening her eyes in the morning, what she could say or do in front of him, and even to close her eyes, to be haunted by him even in her dreams.
She hoped that going away from him would allow her to become the old Shancai again, but Daoming Si didn't seem ready to let her go and continued to torment her relentlessly. The day before, she felt he still loved her. She surprised herself to hope he would kiss her, and she longed to follow him in his room again, even if he was gentleman enough to not suggest it to her.
She was deep in her thoughts and startled when somebody knocked on the door. Mette's cute face appeared, still queasy in her body growing up too quickly. Smiling to the child, Shancai gestured her to come in, and the young danish girl came and sat shyly beside her on the bed. "Are you going out again today?" Mette asked in hesitant English, staring at her bed and her dressing table.
Then, Shancai realized that, without being aware of it, she spread out a few outfits on her bed, she took out her make-up and her clips, her rubber bands and other things to find some hairstyles. Her cheeks immediately reddened.
What was wrong with her? She spent her night trying to persuade herself she would better send a message to Daoming Si, canceling the visit of the day, pretending she caught a cold. As a result, she didn't send any text, and she was already getting ready.
"You were pretty yesterday." Continued Mette with a cute smile. "If I were you, I would take the same clothes. If the boy you saw yesterday gives you a new date today, surely it's because he likes you!"
Shancai's eyes widened, and she was astounded. The little girl – not so little with her 5'4 ft – burst into laughter. "I've got a big sister, and she's as old as you, Shancai. Do you really think I never saw her getting ready for a date with a boy she likes?"
Shancai wanted to answer that she was wrong, but she met Mett's innocent blue eyes, and she realized it was vain. It was useless to lie. She liked Daoming Si and, even if she knew she couldn't do that, she wanted to show off in front of him and to see his eyes filled with admiration on her.
She closed her eyes, the fear invading her again.
It was impossible to solve this problem. Shancai knew she had to reject Daoming Si again, but she was unable to do that. She didn't have the courage anymore, the one she found on this particular rainy night when she walked away from him with her suitcases.
When she turned again toward Mette, the child was giving her the velvet skirt and the black pullover.
Shancai sighed but smiled at her before taking the clothes. Mette smiled gladly at her, and Shancai couldn't help but melt for her. She was the only daughter in her family, and, for long, she dreamt of having a brother or a sister with whom she could play, and she would have protected. The little Danish girl was immediately the object of her affection.
Then, she looked in the mirror, thoughtful, and she met Mette's admiring stare. "You're perfect!" she exclaimed enthusiastically.
Shancai thanked her with a smile, trying to suppress this feeling that her stomach was going into knots. She feared to see Daoming Si again today, but she couldn't help to be eager at the same time.
She closed her eyes, breathed deeply, then took her coat, her bonnet, her gloves, and her scarf. It was only when she was outside she realized she wore a lot of clothes offered by Daoming Si.
***
Daoming Si was afraid. He came all the way to win back Shancai, the woman he loved. He knew she was the only one for whom he could have such a feeling, and it terrified him. He was terrorized with the mere idea he could fail and could lose her forever.
What would be a life without her? He feared an existence without seeing her laughing eyes, her defiant stare, without hearing her acerbic remarks and her annoying lesson in morality. He wanted to be able to taste her meals every day, bicker with her, kiss her, and more, so much more.
He had an insight into what could be his daily life without that, and it was a real nightmare. He couldn't live without her, and if he imagined her with another man, he became crazy. Shancai belonged to him; he knew it; he was sure of it. That certitude was the only thing that helped him to get over every kind of fear.
All night long, he thought about the day he spent with her, analyzing every stare of her, every move she made, and every smile of her. He still saw her cornered against that wall, shaking, but with her pupils dilated as well. She seemed to desire that kiss as much as him, but something prevented her from doing that, restraining her all day long. It might be the same reason that made her run away at first.
Daoming Si closed his eyes and swore softly, cursing his mother. He was mad at Shancai when she gave up, but he knew that Feng could be very persuasive and could do a lot of damages in the life of the people she wanted to destroy.
Shancai was loyal and generous, so it was clear she couldn't bear that his mother hurt the people she loved like her family and her friends. She preferred to sacrifice herself instead of hurting everybody because of her selfishness.
"Are you sure it was a sacrifice?" a little voice hissed perfidiously in his head. "Do you seriously think she loves you?"
Daoming Si closed his eyes painfully, remembering the young woman, in the rain, telling him that no, if she really liked him, she would never leave him. However, he had that feeling that her doe eyes said the contrary, staring at him with despair and regret while she turned her back to him and ran away from him.
Then, he remembered how Shancai looked at him the day before, with that glint that shone in her eyes even if she tried as best as she could to hide it. He also thought about her smiles that she wasn't able to suppress and her hand that caught his without being aware of it.
Finally, he mainly remembered Lei, at the airport, leaning to his ear and whispering, "Idiot, why did you watch her leaving, hiding behind that pillar? Why didn't you show up? Did you know she still has the necklace? She threw herself in the pool after you threw it there and she madly looked for it during hours!"
He couldn't doubt. His instinct and his mind told him so.
Shancai loved him.
He only should break down the last barriers to be able to spend an entire life with her. He would fight his mother if he had to, even if that mere idea terrified him.
Determined, he stood up, put his coat, his scarf and also the gloves and the beanie Shancai made him buy, then he went down to the hall and joined her.
***
Shancai couldn't help but shake while she waited for Daoming Si in the hotel hall. She feared that a hotel employee came and led her to the rich heir's room again. If again, she was trapped against a wall with the handsome young man ready to kiss her, she wasn't sure she would be able to resist him.
She shivered. She felt guilty to have that kind of thought. She had to pull up absolutely. That was only Daoming Si, after all! That pineapple head guy managed to be so unbearable, he threw one of her mother's dishes in her face, he forced her to kiss him on the rooftop, he laughed at her and –
"Hello, Shancai!" A voice said in her ear.
The young woman startled and hastily turned back. Daoming Si smiled brightly at her, and, for a few seconds, the only thing she felt was her heart racing furiously. It was like someone anesthetized her brain, and she was unable to think clearly.
Unbearable, arrogant, immature... she tried weakly to remember all the young man's defaults, but it was vain. Her feelings regained the upper hand again. "A penny for your thoughts?" Daoming Si asked, leaning his head at the same level as hers, a teasing smile on his lips.
Shancai swallowed hard. Obviously, he wouldn't help her to make things easier! Daoming Si stared at her, his head tilted on one side. With his fingertips, he played with the tassel on the young woman's bonnet, pulled slightly her scarf and stroke lightly her gloves, his smile growing wider. The young man was clearly delighted she wore what he bought to her.
As for Shancai, she didn't miss to notice he also wore what she advised him to buy, and her heart skipped a beat unwillingly. She cleared her throat, trying to regain some composure. "I think we should go, shouldn't w?" She suggested, avoiding his gaze because she felt her cheeks warming even more.
Daoming Si nodded enthusiastically, and they left the hotel. They were both more silent than the day before and more nervous. Shancai hesitated about what they should visit at first, and she eventually suggested to make a Copenhagen Canal tour in a boat. They found themselves sitting side by side, wrapped up in their coat, on a boat bench while a guide commented on the visit in English.
Shancai took a lot of pictures, trying to forget Daoming Si's presence on her side, his arm brushing hers, his warm breath close to her ear while he turned to observe what the guide showed to them and leaned slightly to see better. Of course, she ignored that the young man noticed how she reacted and multiplied "accidental" contacts on purpose.
After the canal tour, Daoming Si insisted on inviting Shancai to eat in Nyhavn harbor. Shancai tried to refuse, arguing it was too expensive, and she knew other places in Copenhagen less crowded where they could eat cheaper meals. But, of course, she was talking to a rich heir, and it was no way for him to eat cheap food.
He chose one of the most famous Nyhavn restaurants and, even if she was flabbergasted by the price, Shancai could only admit it was indeed delicious. Without thinking, she told the young man her stay on Copenhagen, talking about the Hansen, their warm welcome, and the characteristics of each family member. She also spoke about the faculty, Helle, her eccentricity, and her friends.
She was about to ask Daoming Si some news of Mingde, the rest of the F4, and how they welcomed Inge, but she stopped abruptly. The young man stared at her, raising an eyebrow, curious to know what she was about to say, and she blushed violently.
She just remembered their last conversation in Shanghai, how he threw the necklace in the pool furiously. Asking him some news of Mingde would be like she asked, "Oh, by the way, how did you feel after our argument and my sudden departure? I hope you didn't suffer too much, did you?"
Shancai hid her head in her hands, and there was a silence during a few seconds. Queasy, Daoming Si fidgeted on his seat and eventually asked: "Are you alright, Shancai?"
The young woman composed herself, shaking her head to clear her mind, and she smiled at him at her best. "No, forget it, I'm just a little tired!" She invented an excuse, but she noticed that Daoming Si wasn't fooled at all.
After lunch, they visit Rosenborg castle then strolled in the park that surrounded it before they ventured in the pedestrian streets a further away. Daoming Si dragged her in design shops, looking for the most ridiculous present ever for his sister.
He made Shancai laughed by showing her the most outlandish objects while she dreamt in front of some articles that she would have like to buy for her flat, but she couldn't afford them. Daoming Si wanted to offer her something, but she refused. However, she eventually ceded when he found a pretty wooden Christmas decoration.
Daoming Si enjoyed talking about his childhood, trips he did with his parents and his sister, Christmas he once had celebrated with his family, with so much joy and laughs – before his father became workaholic and ended to die because of that. Shancai allowed him to loll her with his stories, forgetting again what she promised herself to do and not to do anymore with the young heir.
She didn't even realize that Daoming Si held her hand again, their fingers tightly intertwined as if they didn't bear to be away from each other. She didn't see either the young man's loving stares he gave to her every time she was lost in the contemplation of an object or a house with creative architecture.
As she promised to herself silently, Shancai ended the visit with the Little Mermaid. They walked alongside the docks, passing again by the Admiral Hotel, Amalienborg castle until they reached the wrought iron gates in front of the Anglican church and his impressive fountain.
They remained silent for a moment, admiring it, and Shancai spotted Daoming Si throwing a coin discreetly into the pool. She behaved as if she saw nothing, but she couldn't help to wonder what could be his wish.
Then, she showed him the militarian fort, they walked around its green defensive wall and, eventually, they made for the Little Mermaid. It was only in front of the little statue that Shancai realized their fingers were intertwined during all that time. She wanted to remove her hand, but Daoming Si tightened his grip.
Shancai felt her heart racing furiously. The feelings she had for the young man came back, and she was afraid again about their strength, their consequences, and about that situation that looked insoluble.
She tried to regain some composure and introduces the Little Mermaid, "Do you know Andersen's tale?" She asked.
Daoming Si looked at her, raising an eyebrow. "Do you think I'm an idiot? Really?" He asked with his usual arrogance. "Of course, I know it!"
She bit her lip, annoyed. "Well, when I see her, so sad, so melancholic on her rock, I always wonder what she is thinking." She said. "Is it just before she turned into foam? Does she see the prince being woke up by another girl than her? Does she dream about what she would never have?"
Daoming Si snorted disdainfully, and Shancai glared at him. She wanted to remove her hand again, but Daoming Si held it back again and even pulled her slightly to him. "Idiot!" He exclaimed, half-joking, half irritated. "Do you really think that, if she loves him, she will stay stupidly on that rock, looking another girl flirting with him? If this is the case, the mermaid is either very stupid, either not very in love in the end!"
Shancai opened her mouth to answer something, but he interrupted her again. "Truth to be told, I never liked that Andersen's tale." He said. "The prince is the king of idiots! He falls in love with the little mermaid, it's obvious, but he hurried to marry a girl he saw only five minutes on a beach! Why does he feel obliged to love his savior? He could only feel some deep respect for her! And the mermaid is even more stupid to love such a fool! If I were her, I wouldn't kiss his forehead before turning into foam! I would have abandoned him there, with his sissy fiancée, and I would come back to live with my fellows. What good would it to sacrifice for a guy who isn't worth it? When we love someone, we have to be ready for anything!"
Shancai gulped, on the verge of tears. She knew she sacrificed for someone worth it. But, as for Daoming Si, what did he think she was? She opened her mouth hesitantly, but Daoming Si spoke again. "I prefer Disney version, you see." He said as if nothing happened. "Ariel sacrificed for Eric, but he eventually discovered how precious she is, that he has feelings for her, and he married her, rejecting Ursula, who pretended to be a pretty brunette. Eventually, Ariel didn't suffer for nothing, and Eric deserves her. So, in my opinion, the Little Mermaid, here, is just waiting for the right time to go and find her prince."
Tears were rolling on her cheeks. Shancai looked up at Daoming Si and met his gaze. Words were useless for them to understand each other. With a tender smile, he stroked her cheek and slowly came closer to her. In a trance, Shancai closed her eyes reflexively, ready to welcome his lips on hers – but she woke up with a jolt and pulled away from him, managing to remove her hand from his.
With a forced smile, she gave him her phone. "Can you take a picture of me in front of the Little Mermaid?"
Sighing disappointedly, Daoming Si nevertheless accepted and even enjoyed to suggest some poses to Shancai, making her laugh heartily.
On their way back, they passed by the Anglican church. Shancai suggested to visit it, and he accepted, delighted to extend that moment with her. At the entrance, some volunteers gave them a Chinese handbook explaining the church story. They read it curiously while they visited the building.
In a corner, people could suspend colored papers on a tree for the church followers could pray for them. Even if they were non-believers, Shancai and Daoming Si tried it. The young woman chose a piece of paper with a cat shape while the young man chose one with a dog shape. Shancai couldn't help but tease him, but Daoming Si answered her the same way, and they ended up bickering and left the church, both giggling.
None of them dared to look at what the other one wrote on the paper. If they did it, they would have seen a piece of paper with a cat shape, and one with a dog shape suspended side by side. The first one said, "I wish that Daoming Si find happiness," and the second one said, "I wish to stay with Shancai on my side all my life."
Before long, both were standing in front of the Admiral Hotel. It was too soon for Daoming Si – and, even if she refused to admit it, it was the same for Shancai. "I hope you enjoyed that visit," Shancai said with a smile so sweet he immediately melted.
"A lot." Daoming Si answered, smiling back, and Shancai's knees weakened. "But I'm sure there are plenty of places I could still visit!"
Shancai rolled her eyes, laughing. "Daoming Si!" She scolded him. "You're unbelievable! You always want more!"
Daoming Si ruffled her hair teasingly. "You shouldn't think you can get rid of me so easily!" Then, putting his hand on her cheek again, he added in a whisper. "I already told you, didn't I? I could follow you to the planet Mars if I had to."
Shancai shivered, mesmerized by Daoming Si's intense stare. Without she could react, she felt the young man's lips on hers, and, for a few seconds, she lost her self-control. She allowed herself to loosen up against him, intertwining her fingers in his hair, intoxicating herself with his spice smell and his elegant Cologne fragrance, enjoying the smoothness of his skin and the warmth of his tongue caressing hers.
Then, the fear, this bloody fear, interfered again, and she pulled away from him. "Daoming Si!" She exclaimed, her voice shaking. "You know very well that we can't do that!"
Desperate, he gripped her shoulders. "Why?" He exclaimed. "Because of my mother? I'll talk to her, Shancai! And if I have to, we'll run away together! We could even marry secretly!"
She shook her head. "She'll destroy us; she'll destroy everything I love." She whispered.
Daoming Si took her chin, forcing her to look at him. "Shancai." He breathed. "I promise you that as long as we'll be together, no harm will be done to anyone."
But she shook her head again, on the verge of tears. "It's impossible. You should forget me." She murmured.
Still forcing her to look right into his eyes, Daoming Si exclaimed, "So, tell me you don't love me. Tell it again, and I would definitively give up on you!"
Tears rolled on Shancai's cheeks without she could control it. "Please." She breathed. "Don't force me to tell you that again!"
She choked and sobbed. Daoming Si immediately hugged her, stroking her hair softly. "If you can't tell me that, it's because you love me, Shancai."
"So what?" Said Shancai, her voice muffled against his torso. "What difference does it make that I love you or not? Your mother will still be there, forbidding us to be together, hurting us no matter what would happen."
Daoming Si kissed the top of her head, making her shiver. "If you love me, that changes everything. I'll move mountains; I'll face my mother. I love you, Shancai. I'm thinking about you from dawn until dusk; I don't even know how I could survive in a world where you wouldn't be there. And now, I know it's the same for you."
Shancai wanted to protest, but he put the finger on her mouth. "No." He whispered. "Don't say anything because your eyes can't lie, neither you smile or even your tears."
The young woman's eyes widened with shock, and he stroked her cheek again. "Don't be afraid anymore, Shancai, I'll be on your side."
There was a silence for a few minutes, Shancai closing her eyes, enjoying his palm's warmth against her face. She didn't want him to let her go, and it was terrifying. "Stay with me tonight." He said again. "We'll talk."
Shancai opened her eyes, and she let out an amused laugh. "I doubt we would talk if I stayed with you." She declared.
Daoming Si shook his head. "You know very well that I won't do anything to you if you don't want to."
Shancai looked right into his eyes. "I know it." She slowly said, paralyzing Daoming Si back.
She knew what she wanted, and she knew that, at that moment, she would be unable to resist her desires if she was alone with him in his room again. And what was scaring, at last, was that this mere idea didn't even make her afraid. "It would be better if I leave." She softly said, shivering.
Daoming Si smiled, amused. "Well, go. But you're aware I won't give up, aren't you?"
She nodded, and she couldn't help to smile like a fool. "Unfortunately, yes." She said before leaving as quickly as she could not change her mind.
A strange feeling filled her chest while she walked toward the Hansen's house. It was a mix of joy and excitement. It was utterly exhilarating. It was only in her bedroom she realized something.
To be sure that Daoming Si will always be here appeased her.
The fear had disappeared.
Christmas was coming, and, with it, the hope of a better future was there.
To be continued