Dominic's POV
I was a bloody fool now. I let my anger take over and never once did the consequences cross my mind. I am always so level headed when it came to business decisions. Always calculated and precise. This is what made me the leader I am today. Under pressure, I thrive even more which is why other leaders respected me and stood with me. They would be stupid to stand against me. One thing I do have is a temper and when that diminishes the demon inside me comes out to play. That's when I become the man everyone fears.
But then my past reared itself back into my present and it shook me. No man could ever succeed with this in this lifestyle. However, a tall emerald-eyed beauty waltz back into my life and everything is upside down. My mind is too busy conflicting with itself to think clearly. More precisely too busy conflicting with my heart. One says one thing and the other says differently. It's a constant push and pull that consumes me and my emotions are taking control whereas before I knew to never rule with such things.
So, when Aria told me about her past today those emotions overflowed and took the best of me. Who am I kidding? My emotions have been overflowing since she arrived here. No self-control, giving into her, feeling things I shouldn't be, striving to make her smile and laugh simply because I love that sight and sound. This constant battle within me is fucking traumatic. But every time I watch her I realize it's beautifully traumatic.
Now I need to find her and fix the mistake of letting her see the little bit of chaos within me. I decided to try downstairs first. I saw Ruby sitting outside having a smoke.
"Ruby, where's Aria?"
"Um... I don't know?" She said as more of a question than a statement. "Should I know?"
"No. Thought maybe you would. So, you haven't seen her around here?"
"Not today, Boss." She let out the smoke from your mouth.
I nodded then made my way upstairs. I stood in front of her door trying to figure out what I'm going to even say to her. I began pacing between the door and the wall of the hallway. Each time I think I am prepared to enter the conversation and knock on the door, doubt creeps in making me stop.
I did this for a few minutes before the door swung open quickly. Aria stood there with one hand on her hip and an eyebrow raised.
"I can hear you pacing and mumbling from inside here," she said to me.
"Uh... Can we talk?" I asked her hesitantly.
"Sure." She moved a little letting me into her room.
She closed the door then made her way to her couch. She closed the book she was reading and set it down on the table. She seems quite calm for someone that just witnessed a glimpse of the demon within me. I wasn't sure how to take it or even approach it. So, I just jumped right in.
"I'm sorry for scaring you downstairs in the office. I just didn't know how to process what you just told me and honestly, there were so many emotions running through me at the same time. I had an idiot moment not thinking before reacting. Here you just told me about being abused and I go and trash the place with you in it. I have a temper and sometimes it tends to get out of hand and - "
I was cut off by a pull on my shirt and the feeling of lips on mine. It took a few seconds to realize what just happened. She had moved from the couch to me all while I was talking and just cut me off by kissing me. I reacted and kissed her back. My hands went to the back of her head and tangled in her hair. She now had her hands on my back as the kiss deepened with our tongues meeting and dancing around each other.
Eventually, she pulled back grinning.
"Sorry, you were rambling," she stated shrugging her shoulders.
I narrowed my eyes and nodded. What just happened? She just took control and I didn't know how to feel about it.
"You seem calm," I said to her.
"Look, Dom, I'm going to be honest with you. Was I scared of you? Yes. Did I think things through before running? No."
"Aria, please you have to know I would never hurt you. I would never lay a hand on you." I pleaded with her.
"I know."
Wait, what? I gave her a confused look.
"I know that's not you. It never was. Your father was that man and I know you hated him. The last thing you want is to be anything remotely like him. I don't know the man you are today as a mafia boss but I do know the values you used to uphold. That doesn't just vanish overnight. Well, some of them at least."
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked her incredulously.
"The man whore behavior..." She trailed off.
"Ugh, Dani has been talking hasn't she?" I scoffed.
"Are you denying it?" She asked me.
I stood silent as I stared at her. I rubbed my forehead and mumbled a simple "no."
"Mmm," She sounded out before walking away from me. Damn it.
"Aria, I can't lie to you and say I haven't slept with a lot of women because I have. What I can say is since you came here I haven't been able to do so."
"So, you've tried to?"
"Seriously woman, that's all you got from what I said?" I asked her throwing my hands in the air.
"Well?"
She isn't going to make this easy, is she?
"Fine! Yes, I fucking tried to after that incident in your room after your confrontation with Alexa. You have consumed my every thought Aria and I don't know how to deal with it!" I was getting frustrated now. "I can't be feeling things like this. I made a promise to myself to not subject anyone to this life. I have already damaged your life enough. I will just ruin the rest of you." I said emphatically.
"How have you damaged my life?" She asked a bit confused.
"Aria, if I didn't listen to my father and didn't cause you to run 10 years ago you would have never met that asshole. I basically threw you into his arms." I scoffed. I began pacing now.
"No," she said simply.
"What?" I stopped and looked at her.
"I said no. No, you did not Dom. Let's say you didn't listen to your father and he kept his word to kill me, and it sounds like he would with no remorse. How were you to explain this lifestyle to me then, assuming I would have survived? I was a timid girl back then. Shy and naive. I was not emotionally equipped to handle all this information. I would have run anyways. Think about it."
She made sense. I never told her about my family because I knew she would never accept me, but the Aria today is more hard-headed and determined. More willing to see the world around her instead of only in front of her between the lines.
"You didn't make me do anything Dom. I made the choice. I chose to talk to him. I chose not to listen to my friends. I chose to stay. But I also chose to leave. And I chose to not take any more shit from other men. That's why after him I refused to see or get close to anybody. Every man to me felt like him. Then you walked back into my life. Scratch that you didn't walk, you fucking crashed back in."
I couldn't help but chuckle.
"And for the first time in 5 years, I found myself not repulsed by a man's touch. I didn't know how to process that feeling myself and honestly, I still don't. But I realized something. We are products of our past, but we don't have to be prisoners to it. That was what I did to myself. I made myself a prisoner in my own life thinking the past defined me. It doesn't. It shaped me but what I decide to do with it today is what defines me."
"The truth behind it all is you were my past before that monster was. You had marked my soul before he did. And when you touch me, hold me or kiss me, it all comes back to me. Every little thing..." She trailed off. "I'm tired, Dom. I'm tired of running and constantly being far away from where it's safe. The reality of it all is with you I feel safe, wanted and not damaged. That's a feeling I crave for. I crave you..."