The mirror before me feels filthy when I stand in it's view.
I seem to believe that copious amounts of water can flush my soul and cleanse it of this self-depreciation.
It never works but I'll try it again.
I've let myself go and now this is where I've landed.
I've sunken down into the depths.
I found myself at the deepest floor of the ocean.
There is no light, no noise, no air.
But instead of my body going into panic, My body gets flooded over with serenity.
This feeling of suffocation allows my mind to be still, identical to the water that caresses me.
My tears can't drown me if water already occupies my lungs, I can let go.
I can sob uncontrollably and let myself drain of all negativity and tension.
I can feel my roots earthing themselves into the gentle sand beneath me.
I'm calm in these chaotic waves.