it's midnight 👏 and i wake up for school 👏 in five hours 👏 but who cares
i couldn't change the sad - and confused - expression i knew i had. there was something on my mind that had been on it since i met sam.
i could only mindlessly stare at the led's on the wall and let myself think.
sam was bound to notice, i knew he was. he sat in the middle of the couch, and i sat sideways next to him, legs thrown over his lap. his hand rested on them while the other held his phone.
i had just started to space out when my best friend, of many years, said something i wasn't focused enough to catch.
he snaps his fingers inches from my face, making me jolt to look at him. i don't give the blonde a chance to say anything.
"it wasn't supposed to be you." i whisper, sounding hurt - even though i definitely was not - and scared.
"what?" sam asks, looking over to me with too much concern for my liking.
"i wasn't supposed to fall in love with you. i wasn't supposed to fall in love with my best friend." i hiss, feeling tears well in my eyes and drip down my face.
i move to swing my legs off of him, but he holds me down by placing his hand back where it had been earlier.
"peyton, wait a second." sam says quietly, dropping his phone on the couch.
i scowl, but let him move to hover over me.
he cups my face in his hands and forces me to look him in the eyes.
"are you serious? you're not joking with me right now, right?" he murmurs, searching my eyes for even the slightest hint of amusement or mischief.
"yes, damnit! why would i joke about this?" i choke out, gently grabbing onto sam's wrists.
there's a quiet and unmoving awkward moment as we just sit there; me basically trapped under him with our eyes locked.
i close my eyes and sigh lightly, mentally kicking myself for even saying anything in the first place.
when i felt lips on mine, i didn't listen to my first instinct - which was to open my eyes - but tilted my head up just a fraction of an inch, trying to get somewhere.
all too soon, sam pulls back, and my eyes flutter open.
"i was planning on telling you tomorrow, i had something planned." he whispers, resting his forehead against mine.
"tell me what?" i ask softly, knowing what he meant, but wanting him to say it out loud.
"that i love you." he says.
"if you love me, date me." i murmur, barely tightening my hold on his wrists.
he gives me another quick but sweet kiss, and i smile.
"be my girlfriend?" he asks, giving me a hopeful smile.
"well, after what just happened, i'd be disappointed if i said no." i hum with a light-hearted giggle.