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The click of the hotel door shutting woke Ryan from a dead sleep. He sat up, his eyes searching for Lydia but he came up empty.
"No." he choked out, throwing the covers from his body onto the empty bed where she had laid, wrapped around him. How hadn't he woken up when she got up?
He glanced at the nightstands, hoping maybe that she had left her number but the notepads were blank. His shoulders drooped as he realized that he had no way to get ahold of her.
He had tried to get her to tell him anything about herself but she had been vague. There was a fear that flashed in her eyes when he asked so when it became clear that she wasn't going to divulge any information other than her first name, Ryan quit pushing. He had expected to have a little more time, expected that he'd at least give her his number.
Ryan knew that he had one last chance, maybe he could catch her in the lobby -- she had said something about leaving early. Ryan pulled on a pair of discarded shorts and a shirt. He grabbed his wallet before making his way down towards the lobby.
He scanned the lobby, a familiar figure walking away, Ryan's heart pounded.
Lydia.
"Lydia! Wait." He called, striding towards her. The night before had been breathtaking, mindblowing even. And even though Lydia had kept him at a distance, they had connected in a way that Ryan had never connected with anybody before. What she had told him was that she was into everything that he was into -- she checked every single box that he had for a dream partner. He desperately wanted to get to know Lydia and see where it took them.
"Ryan!" A shrill voice called from behind him. Ryan sighed, instantly recognizing the voice as Stacy, one of his sister's best friends.
Ryan ducked his head down, trying to make it to Lydia before she drove away. Stacy was nice, and she was pretty with a pretty obvious crush on him and any other time Ryan would make small talk but not today. Today, he was a man on a mission.
"Ryan," Stacy grabbed Ryan's arm, stopping him.
Ryan let out an exasperated sigh as he watched Lydia's silhouette disappear into the parking lot. His chance to get to her was slipping through his fingers. "What?" He tried to keep his voice steady, hoping that maybe the quicker the conversation started, the quicker that it would end.
"Did you have fun last night?" She purred. "I tried to find you last night to dance with but I couldn't find you."
Ryan snorted lightly. "I don't dance, you should know that by now." The truth of the matter was that he had hidden in the bathroom to avoid having to turn Stacy down and invoke the wrath of his sister who was deadset that he and Stacy were the perfect match. He turned to leave, his heart was hopeful that he could make it out of the parking lot.
"Wait." Stacy grabbed his arm again.
Ryan turned back towards her, struggling to hide his annoyance. "What is it, Stacy?"
"I was hired as a pit reporter for MRN." She squealed, "Isn't that great, Ryan?" Her hand slid up his arm, resting on his chest. "We'll get to see each other every weekend. We can really get to know each other."
Ryan had to fake a smile, "Great." He deadpanned. "I can't wait." He turned again, this time Stacy let him go.
Ryan practically ran to the parking lot, just in time to see Lydia pull out of the parking lot. His shoulders felt heavy as he turned around, a pit forming in his stomach that made him want to throw up. He knew without a doubt that he had ruined his one shot with the perfect woman and he wasn't sure how he was going to cope.
"Is everything okay?" Stacy was right next to Ryan. "You look like you're going to throw up."
Ryan looked up at her, her eager eyes looking back at him hopefully. He knew that while he found Stacy to be a bit annoying, she was a good person who didn't really deserve to be used. And yet he found himself asking, "Do you want to come up to my room with me?"
A piece of him hoped that Stacy could make him forget Lydia but he knew that was impossible. But maybe Stacy could numb the despair that he was feeling right now. He was willing to find out.
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Lydia woke up with a start. She hadn't meant to fall asleep in Ryan's room but she had been driving for so long that once Ryan wrapped his arms around her and nestled himself close to her, she couldn't fight the sleep that overtook her.
Very carefully and slowly, she unwrapped her body from Ryan's, careful not to wake him. She didn't really want to have to turn him down when he inevitably asked for her number. Ryan was a sweet guy and they had so much in common that it wasn't funny but she was in no place to be in any type of relationship and the last thing that she wanted to do was cut Ryan with her broken edges and insecurities that she no doubt had.
Once free from Ryan's grasp, she quickly slipped on her clothes from last night. Lydia briefly considered leaving Ryan her number but decided against it. Why ruin the most perfect night with whatever would come next?
And the night had been perfect. The sex had been breathtaking -- she had never had anything like that. He had worshipped her body, all of the tattoos that she had gotten when she was young and carefree -- before her life had turned dark. His touch had made her feel alive in ways that she hadn't felt in a long time.
She shook those thoughts off now, they were firmly in the past. The fact of the matter was that she had had amazing sex with Ryan Blaney. She had instantly recognized him -- she had grown up a NASCAR fan and had recently rekindled her love for it. It had taken every ounce of self-control that she had to not say anything to him but she had managed.
She hadn't really been interested in a one night stand but when he had given her the bit about masking his pain, she could see in his eyes that there was a grain of truth. That resonated with Lydia and all of a sudden a voice in the back of her head said What the hell, Lydia? Just one night won't hurt.
It turned out that they had a lot in common, enough that Lydia could feel the pull of herself towards him. But she told herself no. She had it all mapped out -- she was going to law school. She had no desire to be a pit lizard or a racing wife.
Which brought her to sneaking out of the hotel room because she couldn't face Ryan, she didn't think she could actually tell him no if he asked for her number again.
With a small sigh, she took one last look at Ryan who was still sleeping peacefully. He looked angelic, his chestnut curls almost framing his face. She memorized the sight before turning and leaving.
Lydia hurried to her room. She had meant to already be on the road -- the sooner she made it to her apartment, the sooner she could get settled and start the routine of her new life. She grabbed her duffle bag and car keys.
Once in the lobby, she handed her keycards to the front desk clerk and made her way towards the parking lot.
"Lydia, wait!" She heard Ryan call from behind her. Her heart pounded as she started walking faster. She needed to get out of this place.
Once she made it to the doorway, she had the nerve to glance over her shoulder. She relaxed a little to see Ryan talking to a beautiful blonde.
Good. She thought. She looks more like his type anyway. Lydia grabbed the strap of her duffel bag as she stepped out into the humid Carolina heat, leaving Ryan behind her.
It was for the best, she told herself as she slid into the driver's seat. She put her car in reverse, switching to drive and began her drive towards Durham.
As she left the parking lot, her eyes drifted up to her rearview mirror -- a crestfallen Ryan filling her vision. A pit in her stomach formed, a pang of guilt. But she tightened the grip on her steering wheel, repeating to herself what she had thought earlier.
It was for the best.
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