Chapter 28
For the first time in the last hour he finally has time to think. And it scares him. To be left alone with his thoughts while his mate is being torn apart in the ICU, frightens him to death.
Just an hour ago he’d thought everything to be fine. He thought that she was just late and the ignoring of his first text a sign that she may be either pissed at him or too tied up with work.
Well, she certainly was tied up. He should have known sooner. He should have been there to stop her getting hurt. He should have ripped those bastards to shreds. What kind of a mate is he if he can’t even protect his other half? How could he only have noticed something must be wrong after the first dozen calls of his went to voicemail?
And then…He was too slow to act after. He should have gone straight to the police department and scoured for her. Instead, he just rang the Chief up. The very same who’d informed him with cold shock that she wasn’t set any assignment for the night. Of course at that point his stupid male mind went to the possibility of an affair. Goddammit, he shouldn’t have thought that! So he waited. Waited for her to come back and then give her a piece of his mind. Except more time ticked by and there was no sign of her. Then came the phone-call.
Another chilling revelation where the Chief told him to stay put and not worry, they think they know where she is; when they’d discovered the security tape had been playing on loop; when they’d finally realised that a inside rat must have tampered with it. Despite the Chief’s command how could he have stayed put? Somewhere in his mind, something must have clicked because the next thing he knows he’s broken half of the city’s speed limits to get to the warehouses where he once dropped Sam off.
The whole place was surrounded by cop cars and the sirens of an ambulance could be heard gaining closer. He can remember how hard his blood had been pumping, the anticipation rushing through him; he could never forget that. And he can never forget how, once he’d managed to wrangle through the stationed police officers, Sam had been lying face down in a pool of blood.
His whole world had stopped then.
Everything had muted.
His knees had buckled but he’d struggled forward to get to her. He had to know that she was alive. They held him back though, despite his outrage and violent protest they held him back, telling him she’s alive but barely and they have to wait for the ambulance. The ambulance he’d followed all the way to this hospital.
“Mr Carter?”
“Yes.”
Adrian shakes his thoughts temporarily to the back of his mind, facing the surgeon with a cautious expression. One thing he refuses to do is allow strangers to see him break down. And he’s kept to that promise since the age of 15 where even his family haven’t seen him as anything but in control. Control is comforting, control makes him feel safe in the knowledge he can do something about it. But this…he can’t do anything about and he hates it.
“You are Miss Torres’s closest relative?” asks the older man with a raised eyebrow.
“Fiancé,” snaps back Ade.
He knows if he says boyfriend, they would insist on family members so this small lie will have to do, “she removes her ring for work.”
The surgeon nods in acceptance, “okay, well, the good news is, she made it. She’s a very, very lucky woman. In fact, by our estimates with the amount of blood loss she suffered she should not technically have survived and what’s even more surprising is her blood work-”
“Excuse me?” tentatively interrupts Ade. His body tenses tight, deliberating whether or not he has to shut up a few people to keep Sam’s genetics a secret.
“Yes, yes it’s quite fascinating. The blood seems to have clotted at the wounds at an alarmingly higher than average rate, however when we tested the blood, clotting tendency shows it to be in the normal region. Odd, but it did help to save her life, quite a miracle.”
The sigh of relief in Adrian is silent but it’s there, “fantastic, so am I able to see her now?”
The surgeon pauses, his thin lips pressing into a line as he winces slightly, “ah, yes however…she is asleep and…we’re not sure when she’ll be awake.”
Asleep? Confusion overcomes Ade before realisation and he cries, “she’s in a coma?!”
“Yes Mr Carter and we cannot predict when she will awake. Physically she’s been stabilised but psychologically I suspect she’s not ready yet. You can only give it time and be patient. We have a support group if you’d like to talk or a Pastor if you prefer. In the meantime, we will need to you to fill out our health forms on behalf of Miss Torres.”
Forms, okay, forms he can do. That’s fine. He can do that.
“Of course.”
“Great, one of my colleagues will get you them and direct you to your fiancé.”
Ade nods. What else can he do, but agree?
Finally, finally he can see her. If only those forms could help Sam though. He’d agreed to pay for the best treatment for her but there is no treatment, they’d said. They can only monitor her and wait for her to wake up. So he settled on giving her a large private room; one that at least when she wakes up she won’t feel so bad about being in. And Ade’s confident that she will wake up. She has to.
It’s the rules right? She’s his mate and even though he hasn’t marked her, she has to survive. She just has to. He doesn’t know what he’d do if she doesn’t. How will he be able to live his life? Work. Work would be all he’d have left if she leaves him.
Upon impulse, Adrian’s shaking hand takes the cool, limp one of Sam’s and he clutches it tight like it’s his lifeline. Despite her natural bronze skin tone, her face is so pale. Her features are soft and relaxed, peaceful even but he doesn’t want that. He wants to see her lively, ready to go, ready to spar and take on the world. That’s his Sam. Even her body seems frailer; curves though hidden under the loose hospital robe, somehow look less voluptuous. Then there’s the tubes and monitors; all of which he wants to desperately ignore.
Anger suddenly ceases him. How could she do this to him? He told her to be safe. She promised him she would be. She promised him she’d come back alive tonight and they’d…Why couldn’t things have worked out that way? Perhaps then, in this alternative universe, they could be wrapped up in each other’s embrace.
“Why Sam?” he whispers desperately, gaining no response back of course, “why did you go alone? Why did you go? You promised me Princess, you promised me you’d come back to me. I won’t let you go, you know. I can’t…I just…I can’t-” He has to pause.
To stop the sobs and tears escaping. Pulling himself together he tries to remember to be more positive. After all that’s what Sam would want. She’d hate him to be his usual realistic self-although she’d argue that’s pessimistic.
Kissing her cold hand he gives her a shaky smile.
“Come on Sam, sweetheart. You have to wake up. After all, you need to tell me you’re right. You need to pick a place to go in the world for a week, baby. Hear that? You won. You won sweetheart. I love you. There, I said it and I mean it, Princess. So say something. Wake up, say something. Come on, Sam, I need you to say something, anything.”
He can’t. He just can’t talk anymore or hold it together. Breaking out into silent sobs, his body shakes and shudders, while hot tears stream down his cheeks.
He can’t remember how long he’s been there. After his legs started cramping, he’d paced the room, then sat back down and fallen asleep for a few hours. Dawn breaking awakens him and with a deflating heart he sees she’s exactly the same. He needs to go home; logically he knows that. He needs a shower, a shave, a change of clothes but…it all pales in comparison to being there beside Sam. Around mid-morning a nurse comes through. She’s a large woman with a deep Irish accent and the voice of reason toward Adrian.
“Oh dear Lord, pet, have you been here all night?” she exclaims checking Sam’s chart and a monitors.
“Mhmm? Yes,” he mutters running a hand down his face to try and swipe away some of the fatigue.
“Oh pet!” she sighs sympathetically, “why don’t you at least go and get some breakfast and wash up a bit, hm?”
Ade shifts in his seat, glancing across at his sleeping beauty.
“She’ll be right here, dear. Go on,” urges the nurse noting his reluctance. With a groan, he decides it may be best to try being a little more human. After all, if Sam does wake up and he looks like a zombie, knowing her she’d probably go into survival mode and he’ll end up in a hospital bed next to her.
After a quick breakfast in the cafeteria of the hospital he’s right back beside her. Though there’s nothing for him to do apart from wait and watch, his mind runs so many various scenarios about their future. He imagines them in a house similar to the one he grew up in. Although, she’d probably disagree with him on the size and they’d most likely end up in a smaller suburban one. But he’d make sure to have it filled. Kids, they’d have so many kids. As many as she’ll let him. And it wouldn’t matter if he were terrified of messing up parenthood because she’d be there. They’d figure it out eventually together. She’d make a brilliant mother. Tough but fair. Gazing across at her with those thoughts, he can imagine her belly full and rounded, skin glowing and sparkling with pregnancy. The image has his lips quirking in a smile before they fall again as that picture crumbles back into reality and her body’s limp and sick.
With a soft sigh, he sits back and closes his eyes for another short nap.
Day turns to night and being in a private suite, means he’s thankfully not disturbed much and it’s not too loud. As the time crawls slowly away, he finds himself more and more engrossed in his daydreams while hopes of Sam waking up soon dwindles.
Hours turn to days again and by Sunday, Adrian’s found the strength to return back to his apartment to grab his necessities, a quick shower and change of clothes before returning. With guilt weighing down on him, he’d sent a short email to his secretary as well, informing her of his brief absence. As tough as the decision is he’s assured her it will only be until Wednesday at the latest. If Sam doesn’t awaken during that time, he has no idea what he’ll do, but he can’t afford to stop working. Too many people depend on him and he owes it to them to keep going.
That Sunday morning, as usual he awakens at dawn, all thanks to his messed up sleep schedule. His hand encloses Sam’s and heart clenches at the fact it’s still cold and limp.
“Morning Princess…How long are we keeping this up then, huh? I love you, Sam, please, please wake up. Whatever I’ve done wrong, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Just-just don’t punish me like this.-” he breaks off taking a deep breath as he realises the crazy things he’s saying.
Exhaling slowly he plants a soft kiss to her forehead and sits back into the silence. Only it’s broken far too soon and not by nurses or doctors.
Perhaps it’s sleep deprivation or emotional toil because Adrian swears the voices resemble that of his parents.
As the owners of these voices burst through the door into the room, Ade has to blink a few times incredulous as they do turn out to be his parents.
“Mom? Dad? What are you guys doing here?” he questions in disbelief. His father shuts the door as his mother rushes to him and clutches his midriff in a tight hug. Returning it, Adrian pulls back and continues gazing at them both in bewilderment.
“ ‘What are we doing here’? He asks! You haven’t been answering any of the million texts I sent you or my calls! I tried your apartment, your mobile, your work! Nothing! You silly boy, you had me so worried!” scolds his mother with a slap to his bicep.
Adrian’s confusion turns to guilt and tiredness as he glances across to the slim black object on the table-top he’d switched off and abandoned.
“Sorry mom, I just…I completely forgot. But why’ve been calling me?”
“Adrian…Saturday? Your birthday, son. You said you were bringing someone, was it…her?” says his dad nodding over to Sam in the bed. Adrian glances back at her and with regret he notes how badly fate has ruined his perfect plans to introduce her to his family. Pain flashes through him as he realises just how important she is to him-he’d completely forgot about his birthday.
“Yes. I’m-I’m sorry. I’ll apologise to the others later as well.-”
“Don’t be ridiculous, sweetheart. We figured it would have been an emergency for you to bail. But it was the no contact that had us worried. And when your secretary told us you were in hospital and only returning to work Wednesday, we rushed right over,” explains his mom, taking a seat. His father just comes behind Adrian and clasps his hand on his shoulder.
“But forget that. What’s going on? Is this your mate?” asks his dad, gazing at Sam. His mom as well peers at her before shooting her son a sympathetic look.
“Yes..Sam. Her name’s Sam. She’s…” he sighs, “she’s a Deputy, and this is a result of that.”
His father’s hand tightens on Adrian’s shoulder noting the bitterness in his son’s voice.
“Adrian, if she’s a Deputy, she obviously loves her job. Don’t hold this against her. And don’t ask her to give it up for you,” advices his dad.
“Why the hell not?! It’s not exactly fair for her to be doing this to me. Look at where her job’s got her now!” snaps Ade, stress and strain weighing down on him.
“Adrian! Do not speak to your father like that!” instantly reprimands Rachel-his mom.
“Come on, grab your coat, let’s go for a walk. Rachel will stay with her,” instructs his dad, knowing there are some important things he needs to discuss with his son and as much as he doesn’t want to pile the bad news on, Adrian needs to hear this.
“So have you marked her?” questions Zac as they both sit down on the park bench.
“No. I should have. Maybe then-”
“No,” interrupts his dad causing Ade to frown.
“What do you mean, ‘no’? If I’d had marked her then the mate bond would have-”
“No, there’s no knowing that. The mate bond does keep your mate alive but that all depends on your definition of alive.”
“What?!” exclaims Ade. This is all new to him, and he’s not entirely willing to believe it.
“Do you remember Uncle George? You last saw him when you were 9.”
“I remember Uncle George. He and Aunt Linda passed away in a car crash.”
“Not exactly. Linda had a range of mental illness and we’re not sure if it’s accidental or not but she OD’d on her medication.-”
“But how? I thought he marked her.”
“He did and that’s why, we think, that instead of dying completely, she became brain-dead. George was understandably distraught for weeks but he really went off the rails when we had to…well, when he had to let her go.”
“…So-so he’s still alive?” quietly questions Ade.
“Unfortunately not. No one could reach him after that, we all tried our best but a few days after, he…committed suicide,” slowly exhales Zac.
Adrian glances across at his father, noting the grief that remains even after all these years. He can’t imagine that happening to any of his brothers and he has no idea how his dad could deal with that for so many years. Though he is a little pissed that his dad for keeping this loophole and story from him.
“Have you told the others?”
“No-”
“Why?”
“Their situation hasn’t called for it,” simply answers Zac.
And that’s when Adrian realises the meaning behind the revelations. Even if he had marked Sam there’d be no guarantee that the mate mark would save her. She could just remain in a coma but still be ‘alive’, even though it’s no life.
“Do you think that if she…if she doesn’t wake up…I’ll follow in Uncle George’s footsteps?” tentatively questions Ade.
“You’re strong man, son and you’ve adapted to many situations throughout your life…but love can bring even the strongest person to their knees and even now, it’s taking it’s toll on you.”
“Perhaps…perhaps it would have been easier if I didn’t…love her,” quietly admits Adrian. After all, his father said it-love is weakness.
“A life without love probably is easier, because then you don’t have loss but what kind of existence is that? Think about the time you’ve spent with her, the memories you’ve made and the ones you want to make. Think about that connection and tell me you’d rather not have any of it. Tell me that you’d rather none of it happened.”
Ade pauses digesting his father’s words. All the moments he’s had with Sam, everything they’ve done, he can’t even picture doing that with anyone else. And imagining all the things he wants to do, he can’t picture anyone else at his side other than her. And not having any of that? Well, he would have managed, with his life revolving around his work as always. Then what? Perhaps he’d have married a woman and kept an emotional distance. Sam never having been in his life, would most definitely have set it in a more lonely, desolated path. And now he realises, good or bad times to come, the memories and the feelings associated with them of her, is something he’ll never forget.
“I can’t, I love her.”
“I know you do but I must admit, your mother and I could only imagine the day you’d admit that about a woman. She sure must be special.”
“Yeah, she’s special alright,” grins Ade before that grin fades again in remembrance.
Seeing that, Zac quickly interjects with, “then let’s head back to this special lady with some lunch as well.”
Ade nods, rising of the bench in-sync with his father before he stops still and asks his father the one question that’s been burning in his thoughts throughout this whole ordeal.
“Dad, do you think she’ll wake up?”
For a moment silence is his answer, “If and when she’s ready-yes.”
When they arrive back at the hospital with sandwiches and snacks, Zac and Ade find themselves met with the scene of Rachel speaking to an unconscious Sam. Ade knows it’s pointless and futile of him to hope every time he sees her again, Sam’s going be awake but he can’t help it and he can’t help how it then triggers his body to deflate in sadness.
“Ade, sweetheart, where are her family?”
Ade’s stumped for a moment before he slaps his forehead in stupidity.
“Shit, I completely forgot to tell them-”
“Okay, go home for a while, Adrian. I’ll come with you, you need some good food and proper sleep,” she tells him standing up and leaving no room for protest.
Too tired to argue anymore, he agrees.
Back at his apartment, he tosses in the couch, his mind still a mess and heart in an even more pitiful frenzy. Logically he knows he needs these few precious hours of time to himself, except he’s finding it almost painful being apart from her. Still after minutes, despite everything, he falls asleep, albeit a restless one but a few consecutive hours all the same.
The next morning, he has calls back from Sam’s family, surprising him when they say they’ll be at the hospital in a few hours. Enough time, for his mom and dad to regretfully tell him they need to get back home. He has a few minutes to talk to Sam before her family arrives. And like a hurricane they blow in, disrupting the silence.
Her mother as always is immaculately dressed-actually much of her family apart from her brother is well dressed. Lillian struts forwards gazing across the room and inhaling sharply as those cold eyes take in the form of her first daughter lying unconscious in a bed.
“Mrs Jacobs…she’s stable just…not ready to wake up yet,” exhales Adrian standing to greet them and letting them know the situation. As much as Adrian questions the existence of Lillian’s heart, he knows he must do his duty and that means being courteous to her family despite his dislike towards a few of them.
“How-how did this happen?” and then with sudden realisation, “do they know about her.. ‘special’ condition?”
“Through work and no, no they don’t…They said it’s a miracle she’s still alive.”
Lillian has nothing to say back except nod. Both her children shadow her as she steps towards Sam’s beside. Ade notes with no great shock that Jared falls back.
“…Samantha…Sa-Sam…Honey,” and just like that actual tears roll down the sharp cheekbones of Lillian Jacobs.
Even Jesse and Brad stare at their mother in astonishment, Brad’s arms winding around her slim shoulders as she silently weeps for the daughter she’s shamed.
“Mom, mom it’ll be okay, this is Sammy we’re talking about-“ Jesse blinks back the tears that fill her eyes before continuing with a wavering grin, “she’s a survivor.”
“Mrs Jacobs-”
“You’ll be here, won’t you? You’re taking care of her, right?” she snaps anxiously towards Adrian.
He takes Sam’s hand and reassures Lillian, “always.”
Lillian shakes out of Brad’s arms and without warning, winds hers around Adrian’s midriff. Adrian’s own arms slowly reel her in and hold her tight, providing the much-needed comfort they both need.
“It’s okay, Lillian,” he lowly whispers.
“No..no, it’s not. You don’t understand. My baby girl…And I-I…If she doesn’t…She’ll never have forgiven me-”
“Lillian, she’s going to wake up-she’ll be fine. And she’s always forgiven you. All she wants, Lillian is your love. That’s it, that’s all she wants from you. If you can't give her that then cut her loose, don't keep leading her along throwing scraps along the way, it's not fair on her. She deserves better.”
Lillian pulls back, swiping away the tear trails at her cheeks and gazing up at Ade, “I know. I know, it’s my fault. It’s just that, every-time I look at her all I see are my mistakes. I’ve tried-”
“You need to try harder, this is important to her,” interrupts Ade, showing some tough love but reeling it in.
Unlike her nature, she simply gives a jilt of her head and gazes back at Sam.
Bending down, she plants a soft kiss at Sam’s forehead and smooth’s back her hair.
“You’re leaving?” questions Ade.
“We have to get back and…I don’t think we’re the ones Samantha would want to see when she awakes. But…keep us informed when-if-she awakens, won’t you?”
Ade disagrees with their leaving but he doesn’t bother to stop them, because truthfully and selfishly he would rather they leave to stop Sam being overwhelmed when she awakens. He agrees to the reasonable request and nods.
As they leave, he takes Sam’s hand and kisses it.
“You’ll never believe it sweetheart but your mother was here with the promise to try and be better for you. You know this means you have to wake up, right? Come on, baby-”
“A…Ade?”
A/n Was that long? It felt long to me...I know it's not the best chapter-I'm sorry, I didn't have much time! But I really don't want to drag this out too much with the whole 'waking up from a coma' cliches. There will be more chapters, this is not the end, but just a few more!
Thanks for putting up with me for so long guys and once again, I'm sorry I can't give a date on when I can next update-I'm going home for next weekend so I won't be able to write much then and uni-work is already piling up but I am loving Uni so that's good!
Have a great weekend and tell me what you're thinking of Ade's revelations/confession?! And Lillian's! And do you think Sam heard Adrian's confession? xx