A/N: Yoo, guess who's back
Not me
Jk, I came back to wattpad after a long as fuck break
And after playing Mystic Messenger
God, I love that game
If you guys played the game, tell me in the comments who's your favorite character and why
(Zen's my bias, don't @ me)
Anyway, I'm back with these kind of chapters =^=
But please
For the love of God 707
Request anything ;_;
I have zero ideas
So please
I'd love to take your requests ;>;
[Y/N]: Admit it Mutsuki, you've fallen for me
Mutsuki: Well, I--
Haise: He didn't fall for you, you tripped him
Shirazu: Yeah, we saw you
[Y/N]: Shut the fuck up and scram
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Saiko: Can I say something?
[Y/N]: Sure
Saiko: You have the prettiest smile I've ever seen
[Y/N]: Can I say something too?
Saiko: Go ahead
[Y/N]: This smile exists only when I'm with you
Urie: ...
Urie, disgusted: I think I'm gonna throw up, what the fuck
--------------------
Haise: Hey, where's Shirazu-kun?
[Y/N]: Somewhere out there, fucking disappointing Jesus
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[Y/N]: Fact: I can jump higher than any tree
Urie: And how is that even possible?
[Y/N]: Trees don't jump
Urie: ...
Urie: I will destroy you
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Mutsuki: Fucking hell!
Haise: Mutsuki! Watch your language!
Mutsuki: Fucking heck!
[Y/N]: *pops out of nowhere*
[Y/N]: OK, WHO THE FUCK TAUGHT MUTSUKI TO FUCKING CURSE?
Mutsuki: ...
Haise: ...
Haise, sighing: This is not what I signed up for
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Random ghoul, pointing their kagune at Saiko and Haise
Random ghoul: Give me all your money if you want to live!
Haise: Bold of you to assume I want to live
Saiko: Bold of you to assume I have money
Shirazu, yelling: Now is not the time for your crap!
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Shirazu: Yeah, I was embarrassing when I was 16. Who wasn't?
Urie: You were also embarrassing at 18, 19, 20. Last week. Yesterday. Today
--------------------
Shirazu: Hey, do you have a bag I can borrow?
[Y/N]: The only bags I have are the ones under my eyes and they're specifically designed to carry the burden of my existence
Shirazu: ...
Shirazu: Literally, all you had to do was say no
--------------------
Mutsuki: Hey, Shirazu-kun. I wanted to ask you, how did you end your quarrel with [Y/N]?
Shirazu: Well, they crawled on their knees to me
Mustuk, shocked: Really?! And what did they say?
Shirazu: Eh, nothing special
What really happened
[Y/N], on their knees, looking for Shirazu under his bed
[Y/N]: Hey idiot. Get out from under the bed. I've calmed down
--------------------
Saiko: I'm having a salad for dinner
Saiko: Well, fruit salad
Saiko: It mainly consists of grapes
Saiko: Okay, it's all grapes
Saiko: ...
Saiko: It's wine. I'm having wine for dinner
--------------------
Saiko in the middle of the night: Would you still like me if I was a worm?
Shirazu, slowly waking up: Saiko, it's 4 am
Saiko: I feel like you wouldn't
Saiko: Whatever, good night
Shirazu: ...
Shirazu, confused: What the fuck
--------------------
Haise: Alright, listen up you little shits
Haise: Not you, Mutsuki. You're an angel and we're glad that you're here
--------------------
Mutsuki: Don't worry, I've got some knives under my sleeve
Haise: I think you meant cards
Urie: No, he didn't
Mutsuki, pulling out some knives: No, I didn't
--------------------
Urie: Damn, the power went out
Saiko: Don't worry, I got this
Saiko: *starts to shake rapidly and starts to illuminate*
Urie: The fuck
Haise: What
Saiko: I swallowed a flashlight
Haise, on the verge of a cardiac arrest: WHY WOULD YOU---
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Haise: Who smoked weed in our house?
The rest of the squad: *looking at Shirazu*
Shirazu: What?
Saiko: We all know it was you
Haise: No, it was me. I just wanted to see who would get blamed for this
--------------------
[Y/N] and Urie, bickering
Urie, enraged: Just who the fuck do you think you are?!
[Y/N], enraged as well: Your future!
Urie: ...
[Y/N]: ...
Urie: *starts to blush madly*
--------------------
Shirazu: I spy with my little eye someone who needs to shut the fuck up
Urie: Is it me?
Shirazu: It's always you
--------------------
Shirazu: Alright, what should we do?
Saiko: We should do something scary!
Mutsuki: Like what?
Urie: We could go to bed and be alone with our thoughts?
Shirazu: Oi, she said something scary
[Y/N]: I dunno, that sounds scary
--------------------
Saiko: Can I bother you for a second?
Urie: You always bother me, but go ahead
--------------------
[Y/N]: Are you nervous?
Haise: Yes
[Y/N]: Is this your first time?
Haise: No, I've been nervous lots of times
--------------------
Mutsuki: *walks into the room, does a twirl and points at Haise*
Mutsuki: With the exception of you, I hate everyone in this room
Haise, crying: I love you too
--------------------
Haise: Why can't you be a little more like Urie-kun?
Shirazu: Sorry Sassan, I can't get a stick that far up my ass
--------------------
Haise: *sees a group of teenagers doing something stupid*
Haise: God, what fools
Haise: *realises it's the Qs squad*
Haise: Wait, those are my fools!
--------------------
Saiko: Wait, I'm having those things
Urie: What?
Saiko: Y'know, a headache with pictures
Urie: ...an idea?
Saiko: Yeah
--------------------
Urie, [Y/N] and Haise at 4 am
Urie: You couldn't sleep either?
[Y/N]: I'd never let myself succumb to the darkness like that. I struggle with it nightly and I haven't lost yet
Urie: That's noble. I drank 7 cups of espresso today so I'll never sleep again
[Y/N]: Equally impressive. What about you, Haise?
Haise: Kaneki-kun won't let me
[Y/N]: What
Urie: What
Haise: What
--------------------
Urie: Did you know this house is haunted?
Saiko, a little bit scared: R-really?
[Y/N]: Yeah, by tall ghost bitches
Mutsuki: LOOK, THERE'S ONE NOW--
Shirazu: *hits his head on the doorframe*
Shirazu: Ow
Saiko: *screams*
--------------------
Haise: Are you high?
Shirazu: Am I what?
[Y/N]: He said high
Shirazu: Hello
--------------------
Haise: Let's get to know each other better. Tell me about your happiest childhood memory
Urie: Excuse me, my what now
--------------------
Mutsuki: I can't believe we're locked in here together
Urie, hiding the key: Truly unfortunate
--------------------
[Y/N], staring at Urie
Urie, looking up at them from the newspaper: Whatever you're thinking, stop it
[Y/N]: What do you mean?
Urie: You always make that face when you're about to ask something stupid that pisses me off--
[Y/N]: I love you
Urie, blushing: I... I--
[Y/N]: Also, does cereal qualify as a soup?
Urie, sighing frustrated: I fucking knew it
--------------------
Saiko, taking the bottle of milk
[Y/N]: Dude? Aren't you lactose intolerant?
Saiko: It's milk, not lactose
[Y/N]: *slams her head on the table*
[Y/N]: No
--------------------
Mutsuki: Hey [Y/N], nice top
[Y/N]: Thanks, I boug--
Shirazu: I have a name
Haise and Mutsuki, embarrassed: Oh my god!
--------------------
Mutsuki: Shucks
[Y/N]: Hey, I'm upset about it too, but let's watch the fucking language
--------------------
Shirazu: I almost dropped my phone on my soft carpeted floor, but thank god I have lightning fast reflexes and was able to slap it into a wall instead
--------------------
The Quinx Squad in the middle of a mission
Haise: Where's Urie-kun?!
Saiko: We lost Uri-boy again?!
Mutsuki: But he was with us a few minutes ago!
Shirazu: I have an idea
Shirazu: *takes [Y/N] by the hand, making them blush madly*
Shirazu: [Y/N], I--
Urie: *pops out of nowhere and takes [Y/N] by the hand*
Shirazu: Found him
[Y/N]: Urie, wait--
Urie, enraged: Shut up!
Shirazu: I have nothing to do with it
--------------------
Saiko: I'm seeing a movie with my crush soon
Urie: Oh cool. When?
Saiko: Depends, when are you free?
Urie: Next saturda--
Urie, looking at Saiko: Oh, you're smooth
--------------------
Haise: If Shirazu-kun is baby shark, does that make Saiko-chan mommy shark?
Shirazu, blushing: I-I... uh...
Saiko: *lenny face*
--------------------
Akira Mado: You are not allowed to cry in front of Arima. Ever
The Qs squad: Oh, it must be because weakness isn't logical
1 week later
Someone in the Qs squad: *starts crying*
Arima, kicking down the door: I'M ADOPTING THIS SAD CHILD RIGHT NOW
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Saiko: Are you guys uwu or owo people?
[Y/N] and Haise: uwu
Shirazu and Mutsuki: owo
Urie, confused: What the fuck is happening
--------------------
[Y/N]: Hey Shirazu. I'm single, you're single. You know what that means?
Shirazu: Yeah, of course I do!
Shirazu and [Y/N] in sync: We ugly
--------------------
Saiko and Shirazu, stargazing
Shirazu: The stars are beautiful tonight
Saiko: Yeah
Shirazu: You know who else is beautiful?
Saiko: Mutsi
Shirazu: ...
Shirazu: I was going to say [Y/N], but I respect your opinion
--------------------
Urie: Love isn't real
[Y/N]: You're literally making a Valentine's day card for Saiko
Urie, threatening them with a glue gun: You're on thin fucking ice
--------------------
[Y/N]: Me and Urie don't have pet names for each other
Saiko: Sure. [Y/N], what's another word for dad?
[Y/N], confused: Daddy?
Urie, from the other side of the room: Yes, babe?
Saiko, to [Y/N]: Don't you dare lie to me ever again
--------------------
Saiko: You know what's funny? I seem to remember things about other people, but forget things about myself
Urie: Things like?
Saiko: I once forgot my last name
Urie: Just use mine next time
Saiko: Okay
Saiko, confused and blushing: Wait, WHAT
--------------------
Haise, T-posing in the doorframe: Good morning, parental-units
Arima, dabbing: Morning, offspring
Akira: ...
Akira, sighing: I don't get paid enough for this
--------------------
Shirazu: I literally stopped looking at memes for you
Saiko: Bruh, I'm NOT that important
--------------------
Saiko: Do you think koalas get angry?
[Y/N]: Do I look like fucking national geographic?
--------------------
[Y/N]: Yesterday I yote my water bottle thru the hallway
Mutsuki, a little concerned: Did you just use yeet in the past tense?
--------------------
Mutsuki to Urie: I just killed you in the sims
Mutsuki with tears in his eyes: I am a horrible friend
--------------------
Saiko: *falls down the stairs*
Haise: *catches her*
Haise: I think you could say...
Haise: You fell for me
Saiko: Put me down right now
--------------------
Haise: Anyone else feels good when their brain releases a bunch of endorphines?
Urie: Can't relate
Shirazu: Why would my brain release a bunch of dolphins?
--------------------
Haise: You've always got to be positive
Haise: *trips down a flight of stairs*
Haise: Wow, I sure as hell got down those stairs fast
--------------------
Mutsuki: Sensei, what's for dinner?
Haise: Tonight I'm serving looks
Saiko: *slams fist on table*
Saiko: WE HAVEN'T EATEN IN THREE DAYS
--------------------
Mutsuki: You shouldn't use a straw
Saiko: I know, it's bad for the environment
Mutsuki: ...It's just a weird way to eat pasta...
--------------------
[Y/N]: You jerk
Shirazu: Hey!
Urie: Thank you, Shirazu
Shirazu: No, I was going to call you a jerk
--------------------
Mutsuki: H-hey, [Y/N]. Would you like to go on a date after work?
[Y/N]: Over my dead body
Mutsuki: Oh...
[Y/N]: However, I'm pretty dead inside, so sure, let's go
Mutsuki: YOU COULD HAVE STARTED WITH THAT
[Y/N]: Oh, sorry
--------------------
Saiko, pouting
Urie: Are you doing that for attention?
Urie, cuddling her: It's not gonna work on me
--------------------
Haise: I panic when people compliment me
Haise: Like, what am I supposed to say when someone compliments me?
Mutsuki: Good job out there, Sensei!
Haise: Happy birthday!
Mutsuki: ...
Mutsuki, confused: Wha--
--------------------
[Y/N], driving with Haise
Haise: YOU NEARLY RAN OVER URIE-KUN!
[Y/N]: Shit
Haise: ...
[Y/N]: ...
[Y/N]: LET ME TRY AGAIN
Haise: NO
--------------------
[Y/N], angry as heck
Shirazu in a soft voice: [Y/N]...
[Y/N], calming down
Shirazu: [Y/N]~
[Y/N]: STOP IT, I'M MAD
Shirazu: [Y/N]~ babe~
[Y/N], covering their smile: STOP
--------------------
Saiko: Hey, what time is it?
[Y/N]: Dunno, pass me that saxophone
[Y/N]: *blows saxophone loudly*
Urie from upstairs: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING A FUCKING SAXOPHONE AT 3 AM?!
[Y/N]: It's 3 am
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A/N: Yup, it's good to be back