Two days later on Monday, Harry was due back at work again. When he woke up, Zayn wasn't in bed. But after a brief moment of panicking, he saw him sitting on the couch in the room, sipping coffee and staring out the window.
"You're up early."
"Yeah."
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, I guess."
"Hmm. When I went to bed you were still awake. Why do I get the feeling you didn't sleep at all last night?"
"Because I didn't."
Harry came over and stood next to him. "You know sleep is important for healing and recovery, don't you? And with the weight you lost, lack of sleep won't help you gain it back."
But Zayn scoffed. "I can't sleep. I don't want to. Ethan kept giving me an injection that made me sleep for hours and each time I woke up, I had to spend a moment just figuring out where I was. That was awful."
"But this isn't like that. Not with me."
"Still..."
Harry sat down on the couch next to him. "Are you sure you're even going to be able to take care of the kids? Their last day of school was Thursday. So they're home all day now. That's why we hired Hannah and Marie."
"No. I don't need them. I know how to take care of them. I'll be fine."
"Okay, but you do need sleep before you have to do that. How about you and I go take a shower together. It might help you rest."
But as soon as Harry said that, Zayn drew away from him and got up. "I don't want to shower with you."
That really hurt Harry. He knew something was wrong. Ever since he brought him home, Zayn hadn't given him a single kiss. On top of that, he had been very opposed to Harry seeing him naked. In fact, he purposely went into the bathroom to put on his pajamas last night and screamed harshly at Harry when he nearly walked in on him. Harry wasn't one hundred percent sure. But something told him his actions had a lot to do with being found in women's lingerie.
"Zayn."
"What?"
"I know I said when you're ready. I still mean that. But whenever you do, I'd like to know what happened in that shed."
Zayn sat on his own side of the bed. "Why do you keep telling me to tell you when I'm ready as if I haven't already? I already told you. Yes, he killed that girl. And no he did not rape me."
"That's not what I'm talking about. Did he say something to you? About me?"
"No."
"And that's the truth?"
"Harry. I would like it very much if you didn't question me and just got ready for work. Thank you."
Harry twisted his mouth sideways. Well that was that. The conversation would have to end there if he didn't want to argue. So knowing he had just been shut out, he got up from the couch and got ready for work.
When he got there, he went into his office and leaned on his elbows to think. He really did miss having Zayn at work with him the past two weeks. But it looked like he was going to be missing him for an even longer while now. Based on the way Zayn behaved over the last two days, he knew Zayn was nowhere near ready to come back. Not just because of the bruises on his face. But because of the things in his mind. No way could he handle the duties that would be put on him when he was under so much mental stress. And because Harry knew that, he also knew there was something else that needed to be done.
He picked up the phone in his office and searched a list of numbers, looking for the one to Carla's office. When he found it, he dialed it and waited for her to answer.
"Carla's office."
"Yes, it is me. Mr. Styles."
"Oh. Hi."
"Hi. Will you meet me in my office? I want to talk about something very important. But don't worry. You're not in trouble."
"Sure. Now?"
"Yes. Now."
"I'm on my way."
A half minute later, there was a knock on his door.
"Come in."
The door opened and Carla walked in.
"Close the door behind you and then have a seat."
She did.
"I know you're busy with the job you're supposed to work. But I called upon you because I am about to ask you to do something for me that you haven't done in a long time."
"Okay. What is it?"
"I need you to hire an assistant for me."
She looked confused. "You mean find someone for Zayn's job?"
"Yes. Zayn won't be here for a while. So I'm going to need a temporary one in his place. Someone who does not mind traveling with me. Someone who doesn't mind doing whatever I ask. Someone responsible, hardworking. You know... whatever it is that you found in Zayn."
"That might be hard."
"I know it will. But that's okay. You'll get a bonus for the time you spend. Just make sure whoever you hire understands that it's only a temporary hire. It isn't permanent."
"Okay. I will. And what about the office. People are going to be asking questions. Is Zayn's kidnapping still a secret for everyone else?"
"Yes. They still think he's sick and only you and Liam know the truth. It should remain that way."
"I'll see to it."
He sat back in the chair and thumb wrestled with himself. "Well, thank you for your help. You can return to work."
He was expecting her to get up and go at his dismisal. But she stayed in the chair and studied him. Just by looking at him, it was easy to tell he really needed someone to talk to. Zayn's kidnapping was hard on him too.
"How are you holding up?"
"Uh... I'm okay. I understand that life moves on. Plus I have Zayn back. So I'm one of the lucky ones."
"How is Zayn, then? I couldn't be there for the welcome home surprise but Liam told me he asked everyone to leave."
Harry looked embarrassed. "He did. But only because he's self conscious about how he looks with the bruises and all."
"You mean Zayn Malik cares what people think about him? Strange."
"You have no idea just how strange. And not just that is strange. But everything. The way he's acting. Talking. All strange. He won't even follow the doctors dietary instructions. Even when he knows he's malnourished after what happened to him."
"He's still readjusting."
"Must be."
"What about the beard?"
Harry stood up from his chair and went to the window to look down at the traffic. "It's still there. And he has made no effort to trim it. To be honest, I'm worried."
"About his facial hair getting too long?"
"No. It's not just the hair. He looks handsome with it. I like the beard. What worries me is that he's been home for two days and still hasn't tried to shave it. But you and I both know him well. He always keeps his beard shaved for veronica. His clean shaven face is for both Veronica and Zayn. That's what he says. But if he's not shaving it..."
"Ah. Then you're worried that it has something to do with Veronica."
"Exactly."
She thought for a moment. "Well... I'm no professional but I do know this isn't abnormal. This happens all the time with kidnapped victims. You just have to be there for him, wait for him and be patient with him. Don't rush him to say anything he doesn't want to say. And don't try to make him feel something he isn't feeling."
"Yeah. I know. That's what I'm trying to do."
"Then keep it up. And one more thing."
"What?"
"Don't be afraid to talk to him about seeing a mental health professional. He might deny it. But as soon as you think he's ready. Run it by him. I promise it will be very helpful for him and he shouldn't feel ashamed about needing one if he does."
He thought for a moment and then shrugged. "I'll think about it."
"Good luck."
"Thanks."
Her wishes of good luck were good and all. But somehow Harry believed it was going to take a whole lot more than that for things to return to normal.
* * *
The Styles family were all in the living room sitting on the floor, working on a one thousand piece puzzle. Harry figured it would be a good family activity and be relaxing enough to help ease Zayn's mind. On top of that, he and Zayn did finally get around to drinking the bottle of vintage port together. And Zayn did seem to enjoy just getting to enjoy a glass of wine with him again.
As Harry finally found the corner piece he'd been looking for, the doorbell rang. Zayn jumped but Harry patted his leg.
"It's alright, baby. I'll get it."
Zayn had no problem at all letting him get the door while he worked more on the puzzle. But when he realized Harry was taking too long and hadn't come in with a guest, he told the children to wait there and slipped into the foyer to listen quietly from a distance. He couldn't see who was at the door. He could only hear them.
"And so now that the case is officially closed due to Mr. Gallaway's death, these belong to you again."
Harry took a baggie from him. "Whoa. The rings."
"Yes. We matched them to the pictures you sent in so we knew these were them the moment we logged them into evidence."
"Zayn is going to be so thrilled to have these back. I can't wait to show him."
Zayn left before the conversation ended.
"Well then don't let me be the one to hold you up. And of course, Mr. Styles. If there is anything you or your family needs, don't hesitate to call us."
"Really?"
"Yes. Any friend of Amos' is a friend of ours."
"Well, alright then. I'll remember that."
"You take care."
"Thanks, Officer Langley. And you do the same."
He closed the door, locked it, then hid the baggie behind his back with a huge smile on his face.
"Zayn."
But when he came into the living room, Zayn wasn't there.
"Hey, where's daddy?"
"I dunno." The children said.
So he went looking for him. After searching only a few important rooms in the house, he came to the bedroom. But he was shocked by what he found. First he saw Zayn's women's clothing designs from his sketchpad torn up on the bed. Next, all of his women's underwear and special lingerie were in the middle of the floor on the rug.
"Zayn." He called.
There was no answer. But he heard rustling and sounds of clothes hangers clashing inside Zayn's closet. So he put the baggie down on the dresser and made his way there.
He gasped when he found Zayn pulling everything from Veronica's side of the closet off the hangers and onto the floor."
"Zayn, what are you doing?"
"Go away!"
"What are you planning to do with all this stuff?"
"Throw it away."
"Throw it away? Why would you want to do that. You love Veronica's things. He's a part of you. Remember?"
"Not anymore. I hate him!"
"No you don't."
"I do! And I know I do!"
He went back to yanking clothes down but Harry ran inside and grabbed Zayn's hands. "Stop it."
"NO!"
He tried to fight Harry and push him away. But Harry grabbed him with two arms and held him. All his movement caused them to stumble on the clothes and fall down.
"Ah! Let me go! STOP!"
"Calm down, Zayn. It's just me."
"HELP!"
Harry knew that was an unusual word for Zayn to call out around him. So that's when he realized Zayn's eyes were closed tightly. And he wondered if that meant he was imagining he was back in that parking lot where he had been grabbed just like this and taken away. That was probably what happened that day in the kitchen too. He knew he had to pull him from his flashback.
"Open your eyes, Zayn."
"Let me go!"
"Open your eyes! It's just me!"
Zayn opened them and when he realized he was still in the closet and in the arms of his beloved husband, he stopped fighting, then turned his head to face Harry.
"We're going to be alright." Harry whispered to him. "You know that?"
Zayn put a hand to the side of Harry's face and caressed it softly. For some reason it was like he was seeing Harry for the first time all over again. As if he finally believed his own words when he told his mother he was safe now. Out of nowhere, he leaned forward and he kissed him. It was the first time they'd met each other's lips and tongues in a long time. So Harry soaked it up like French Country Boule in tomato soup.
"I love you." Zayn told him.
"I love you too."
After that, Zayn curled into Harry and lay on his chest. Harry didn't even worry about the rings or rush Zayn back out there to do the puzzle. He knew comforting him like this was much more important at the time.
As he held his husband close, he thought about the brown pelican again. That particular bird did always dive down into the water, scoop up fish and then eat them. But there was something else very important that he forgot he had learned.
Before they swallowed their prey, it was necessary to drain the water from their pouches first. At that point, the birds were in their most vulnerable moment, so gulls and terns would take advantage of it by trying their very best to steal the fish from the pelican's beaks. Some even succeeded.
So maybe Zayn was taken by a figurative pelican in the beginning. And maybe it even got to hold on to him for a while too. But not for too long. Zayn wasn't gone for good. Harry managed to steal him away in time. Though not before he endured any harm, unfortunately.
But now that Zayn had kissed him, this was a start. He finally knew what he had to do to get things back to the way they used to be. He had to take things the only way they could be taken. One step at a time. One day at a time. One emotion at a time. That's the way it had to be until Zayn fully healed inside and out. What another intriguing journey yet to come.