TRIGGER WARNINGS : verbal/mental abuse, implied self harm (cutting), suicidal thoughts, swearing, slapping
Remy POV
"Welp, that was fucking weird," I said, after a few minuets of shocked silence. All of us watching as Virgil walked away with Damien.
"Language," Both Patton and Emile said at the same time.
"What did...all that mean?" Asked Roman, clearly jealous of Damien.
"I think Virgil has a secret boyfriend," I said, trying not to laugh as Roman's face twisted with jealously. God, he's not even trying to hide how much he likes Virgil.
"Both Virgil and Damien agreed that this time they were just going to friends, not a romantic relationship." Logan said. "Though it is obvious they were in some type of relationship before, but most likely a toxic one based on Virgil's reaction to Damien when he first arrived."
"That doesn't answer our questions," Patton mumbled. "Are they okay? Is Virgil okay?"
"They're probably fine," Emile said softly.
"What do you guys think about all that?" Asked Roman
"These two have a past," I said in a dramatic voice.
"Not helping asshole," Roman said lowly.
"Fight me bitch," I said, flipping Roman off. Roman glared at me before stomping off.
"How was that helpful?" Asked Patton, very clearly distressed by all of this.
"Don't care," I grumbled. "Virgil's past with Damien is none of our damn business unless he wants to tell us."
"Come on Patton," Logan said, motioning to the parking lot. "Let's just stop talking about this. It's the weekend now, we can discuss this with Virgil on Monday."
Patton thought for a moment before nodding and following Logan. I sighed and flopped backwards onto the table.
Emile laughed at me and kissed my cheek. I smiled and pulled him into a kiss.
"Love ya babes," I said. "But I gotta get home."
"Okay, I need to drive Patton home anyways. Unless Logan took him home," Emile told me.
"I'll bet ya a coffee Logan took him home," I laughed along with Emile.
I stood up from the table and pressed a kiss to Emile's forehead. Emile smiled softly up at me. God I love him.
"Text me or something," I told him. "See ya Monday honey."
"Bye Rem." Emile called and I waved and turned away. I started my walk home, slinging my bag over my shoulder.
I don't think there's any parties this weekend, so nowhere to hide out and get drunk. Great...just great...
I should probably stop drinking so much. I don't wanna end up like Mom. But it makes me forget.
It took about twenty minuets, but I finally made it home. Thank god Mom's car wasn't in the driveway.
I unlocked the front door and stepped into the house. Shutting the door behind me, I headed into the kitchen.
I looked for some food but most of the cupboards were empty. The fridge wasn't in any better shape.
I finally found some crackers to munch on. I strolled through Instagram trying to find some part going on. But in a small ass town like this, there wasn't nothing close enough to go to.
I debated trying to sneak into a club a few cities over. But I'd rather not get in trouble if I got caught.
I walked into the living room and flopped down on the couch. I turned on the tv and started flipping through channels absentmindedly.
~•~
The front door slammed open caused me to jump awake from my nap.
"Remington!" Yelled Mom while slamming the door shut.
"It's Remy!" I screamed back, scrambling off the couch so I was standing.
"Don't talk back to me!" She yelled while clambering down the hallway.
I watched her with weary eyes as she walked into the living room. She was smoking again. She looked at me before pulling the cigarette out of her mouth. She was wearing a tiny skirt that barely covered her ass, the tube top didn't do any better for her chest, she had on white stilettos, along with the cheap dollar store makeup, blonde highlights, and badly done spray tan.
"Did you find anything for dinner?" She asked me. Blowing a puff of smoke at me.
"You're the parent here, isn't that your job?" I argued.
"How many times do I have to tell you to not talk back to me?" She growled.
"Or what?" I said lowly. "You'll kick me out too?"
"Your father ran away and abandoned us and you know that idiot," Anger filling his voice.
"No, he left because you kept cheating on him," I argued.
"That's not true! He just left because you were such a fucking disappointment." Mom seethed. The words hurt, but it's not like I'm not used to hearing them.
"No, it's 'cause you just sleep around with any guy that's willing to pay you." I said, pointing a finger at her.
"It puts food on the table," Mom retorted.
"For you!" I yelled. "Not me!"
"And I care why?"
"You're my mom!" I told her. "You're supposed to help me! Not sleep around and get drunk and high all the time!"
"You don't know anything about me." She growled.
"I know enough."
"You were a mistake. You ruined my fucking life!"
"Go ahead!" I screamed. "I don't care! Tell me over and over how much I ruined your life and your marriage! When it was your own god damn fault!"
"I wish you weren't my son, you fucking disappointment." Mom growled at me. "Why couldn't you have been a good son?! A normal son?!"
"That's not who I am."
"Why can't you just act like a normal boy?" She asked. "Why the disgusting heels? Why the makeup? Fucking fag."
"I can do whatever the fuck I want!"
"I. Am. Your. Mother!" She yelled. "Boys don't belong in makeup! It's not natural!"
"I don't care!" I yelled back.
"You were a mistake! I wish I had just aborted you when your father got me pregnant!" She screamed. "I should have dumped his ass and just gotten rid of you! Than I wouldn't be stuck here."
"I didn't ask to be born!"
"Than why don't you kill yourself?!"
"Well then I wouldn't get to ruin your life anymore, would I?" I taunted her despite trying to hold back tears now.
"I hate you."
"Right back at ya."
"Disappointment."
"Asshole."
"Don't talk to me like that!" She screamed, her fists balling up.
"Than why can you talk to me like that?!"
I! Am! Your! Mother!"
"So?!"
But instead of a response, I got a slap across the cheek. I fell backwards onto the couch, looking up at Mom in shock.
She's never actually hit me before. Just screaming, arguing, and insults.
"I want you out of my house," She growled. "I don't want to see you for the rest of the night. Or the rest of the weekend for that matter. You better not come back here until the weekend is over."
"You...you can't do that!" I yelled, slightly in shock. "You can't just kick me out for the weekend! I need somewhere to sleep!"
"I don't care," Mom said with cold, unloving eyes. "I can't bear having to see such a disappointment right now. I have some...clients...coming over and I don't want them to have to see my mistake."
I couldn't think of anything to say. I slowly picked myself up from the ground, glaring at Mom the entire time.
"Get out of my house now, you mistake," Was the last thing she said before storming out of the house. I hurriedly headed up the stairs to my room.
I heard the car start up and drive away. I fell to the floor in my room and started sobbing.
I'm such a mistake. I should just die. Or disappear. Or something.
But what about Emile? Said a voice in my mind. But nastier thoughts about how he must hate me overcame that thought.
I don't deserve Emile. I'm such a fuck up. That's all I'll ever be. I ruined my parents marriage. I'll hurt Emile eventually.
Emile is a good person. He does good in school. He's kind and caring. He has friends. He doesn't cause fights and arguments with everyone. He's soft. He doesn't hurt people. He has a good family. He stays safe and at home. He's stable. He cares about himself and others.
I'm a bad person. I'm failing out of school basically. I'm mean and sarcastic. I don't have any friends besides him and Patton. I fight with everyone over stupid stuff. I try to act tough. I hurt people. I destroyed my family. I run off every weekend and go partying. I'm unstable and don't take care of myself. I cut. I rarely sleep. I don't care about others like he does.
He doesn't fuck up everything like I do.
I'm not good enough for him.
Maybe I should just kill myself. That would fix everything. I'd stop being such a burden on everyone.
But Emile. Said that tiny voice again. He loves you.
No he doesn't. He would be happier without me. I should just disappear. Take my stuff and skip town. Try to survive in a bigger city. Probably die early on or something.
But Emile.
Emile would hate me if he knew all this about me. He would hate me too. He would be disappointed. I'd be a mistake for him too. He made a mistake dating me.
But Emile.
I slowly got up and dried my tears. I grabbed my phone and checked the time. 6:32 pm.
I texted Emile. Hopefully he can hang out right now. I really need him.
Me - Hey babes wanna hang out tonight???had a date night idea ig
💕Emile💕 - Of course! Where are we meeting?
Me - imma pick you up at your house it a surprise
💕Emile💕 - Okay, can't wait!
Me - be ready in like 5
I turned off my phone and finished wiping my tears away. I'll be okay. I'll talk to Emile.
If I'm being kicked out of the house so Mom can get laid for drugs and money, at least I can spend the weekend with Emile. Aka, the only good thing left in my life.
I ditched my heels for my scuffed up combat boots. I quickly left my house, actually glad Mom had left for the bar.
I headed over to the garage and pulled the door open. I pulled the tarp off my pride and joy...besides Emile.
My motorcycle.
I rarely rode it because I didn't want to wreck it or anything. Also, if Mom found out I still had my motorcycle, she'd make me get rid of it.
I ran my hand over the smooth black metal. We only had one car anyways, and Mom took it too the bar. Usually she always has it, but a few times I get lucky.
The luckiest was the day I confessed to Emile. She was stuck at "work" all day so I was able to have the car and house to myself
Mom not being home is the only time I'd ever bring Emile to my house.
I climbed onto the motorcycle and started it up. I liked the feeling of it's engine rumbling.
Kicking up the kick stand, I quickly drove out of the garage. I didn't have a helmet, but I didn't really care. If I crash and die, I crash and die.
I headed towards Emile's house, hoping the weekend would start getting better now.