*Rachael's POV*
It's been two days since I explained what happened with Adam. I missed him like crazy. I decided to ask him out for coffee or something, I just needed to talk to him. I wanted things to go back to normal, to get married and love each other like we used to.
But I know that I've fucked that up.
I can't believe that he actually came over that day.
After what I'd done to him.
If it was me, I'd never do it.
I couldn't.
I decided to call him.
"Hello?" He called through the phone.
"Hi," I said. "It's me," I said quietly.
"Hey," he said.
Silence.
"I was just calling to ask if you wanted to get coffee or something?" I asked.
"Um...I don't know. Where?" He asked.
"There's this really nice place I know in the city," I said.
"Okay. When?" He asked.
"Now?" I asked. "I really want to see you," I blushed. I actually just said that, I thought.
"Alright. Give me the address and I'll meet you there in twenty." He said. I gave him the address and I could hear a pen scratching on paper as he wrote it down. I smiled. I would be able to see him again.
"Okay I'll see you there," he said.
"Okay. Love you," I said. My eyes went wide. Shit. I didn't mean to say that.
"Lov- see you." He said.
He nearly said it back.
But I can't blame him for not.
Look what I did to him.
I looked down at what I was wearing: a loose lavender spaghetti-strap chiffon top and high waisted black shorts. I ruffled my hair at the roots in the mirror and slicked on a little bit of lipgloss.
"You can do this." I said to myself in the mirror.
*Adam's POV*
I nearly said I loved her back.
I wanted to, deep down.
I wanted to forget - more than anything. I wanted to forget everything she did to hurt me, and take her in my arms and never let go.
But I knew I couldn't.
I looked myself over in the mirror: Black jeans, black shirt. Simple.
"You can do this." I encouraged myself in front of the mirror.
I hopped in my car and arrived at the coffee shop, seeing Rachael hugging herself from the cold standing just outside the coffee shop.
I parked the car and walked towards her. She smiled. I smiled weakly back. "Hi," I said.
"Hi," she replied.
"Come on, let's go inside. Too cold out here." I said, walking behind her as we entered the coffee shop.
"So...how've you been?" She asked once we were sitting down in a little corner of the coffee shop, coffees in hand.
"I'm alright. You?" I asked. She bit her lip.
"I'm okay." She replied. We fell into awkward silence again.
"Adam?" She asked.
"Yeah?" I replied.
"Can we just talk like normal people? But talk about while I was...away?" She asked. I nodded.
"What did you do after I left?" She asked.
"Not much of anything. Cried a bit." I said numbly, not caring if I made her feel bad.
"Oh," she said, looking down.
"Did you go out with anyone while I was in New York?" She asked.
I nodded.
"How many girls?"
"I don't know,"
"What do you mean you don't know?"
"Lost count."
She looked down. I felt horrible. I had a lot of one-night stands with bimbos.
"Brittany was one of them." I blurted out. Rachael's jaw dropped.
"Why are you sleeping around with slutty bimbos?" She asked. I twisted my mouth.
"Bad rebounds." I muttered, looking down.
I just remember wanting to forget about her.
"What about you, how many guys did you see?" I asked.
She looked down.
"No one." She said.
My mouth fell open.
"What?" I asked.
"I didn't see anyone," She said. "I threw myself into work. I was too busy. And I was always thinking about you. I saw a few guys for coffee a couple times, but that was it." She said, smiling.
I couldn't believe it. There must have been guys drooling over her all over New York.
They would've whistled at her, and stared at her ass, and cat-called at her...
It made my blood boil just thinking about it.
"I was hospitalised." I blurted out.
"What?"
"I was hospitalised. Five times."
"What? Why? When?"
"I had to forget. I had to forget about everything, Rach. You. I wanted to forget about you." I said.
Tears welled up in her eyes, but didn't fall. "Adam,"
"I know. But it's alright, that hasn't happened for years now. But I used to get so drunk, I just passed out on the street. I wound up in hospital, I was just lucky that the guys came and found me. I didn't have anyone else." I said, looking down.
A single tear fell down her face, landing on her thigh. Her head was hanging low. I felt bad for her, but at the same time, I was glad she knew how much of a mess she made me. "I couldn't cope, Rach," I said. My voice caught in my throat. She nodded.
"I'm so sorry, Adam, you have no idea how fucking sorry I am." She said. I grabbed her hand.
"I'm alright, Rachael. Now I am." I said, meaning it. I felt better with her around me. I loved her so much, despite what she did to me.
I think I'll always love her.
"Okay, I'm going back to talking like normal people." I said.
"How's the band going?" Rachel asked, wiping her eyes.
"It's pretty good. Oh- I never asked. Why are you our backup singer, what about your career?" I asked. Rachael had been straight out of high school into four years of uni to become a world-renowned lawyer.
"It's alright, I guess. I haven't had many big cases," she said.
"So you became a singer instead?" I asked.
"Yeah. Like, I'm still a lawyer, but I'm doing this as a side thing. I mostly wanted to get closer to you, or at least see you." She said, smiling a little bit. I smiled and felt myself go a little red.
"Okay," I said as I hoisted myself up. "Let's go." I said.
We had sort of brushed off the awkwardness. I just wanted us to go back to normal.
We were currently sitting on her couch, in her apartment. Random music from Rachael's phone was playing softly through her phone that was plugged into her stereo.
"So..." She said.
"So..." I replied.
"What are we going to do?" She said, looking at me.
"It's your apartment. I don't know." I laughed.
*Rachael's POV*
I laughed. Adam, the love of my life that I left heartbroken, was sitting here, in my apartment.
I missed him so much.
I just wanted to forget about everything I did to him.
"What are we going to do?" I asked again.
"Like I I told you before," he laughed. "I don't know,"
I laughed and looked towards him. I turned slowly to face him. I knew what was happening and my heart was beating too fast to be human.
Adam and I were facing each other now.
He leaned in and I took him by surprise by kissing him first. He kissed me back, passionately. I awkwardly climbed closer so I was straddling him with my arms around his neck. His hands were gripping my hips with his thumbs through my belt loops. The kiss deepened and got more intense before Adam's eyes opened, and he put his hands on my shoulders, pulling me away.
"We can't do this. I can't do this. This is just too soon. We're...w-we're toxic for each other now, Rach." He said. I sighed and nodded, climbing off him.
We lapsed into awkward silence for a good ten minutes solid.
"Can we at least be friends?" I asked.
He nodded, smiling a little.
And then he kissed my forehead and walked out of my apartment.
Hey. *tear rolls down face* I love Adam and Rachael, but... Rachael did all that stuff...ugh. So many emotions at the moment. I'm such a weirdo. I'm sitting in school at the moment at lunch and I'm just dying about the Adam/Rachael situation quietly.
Bye. xx -Anna