A/N: WARNING! This chapter contains explicit mention and description of rape and suicide. Please do not read if these topics are triggering for you.
It was late, Slade's eye was starting to sting with fatigue. After his conversation with Bruce Wayne, he and Dick had gone above ground and into the warehouse, which was decked out with training equipment and a running track. They had spent a few hours running, although Dick had shown interest in some of the other equipment, Slade didn't want him to push himself until his body had had a chance to heal from his fever. This routine continued for a few days, very quickly Dick got his strength back and Slade had to admit, the kid was fast and had a lot of stamina. He was clearly used to running long distances. When they finished their final lap, Dick always appeared to be a lot less agitated.
'You enjoy running.' Slade had commented on the fourth day of their running routine.
'It clears my head.' Dick said from his place on the floor, stretching his legs out in front of him and bending himself over them whilst gripping the soles of his feet.
'Is that what you were doing the other night?' Slade asked, remembering the clothing he had found the boy wearing. 'Clearing your head?'
Dick had looked up at him, weighing up what he should tell him. 'Cyborg found out the truth.' He finally answered. 'He confronted me about it.'
'What did you tell him?'
'The truth. The guy was caught and that's that.'
'Is that the truth?' Slade asked. 'Remember you promised not to lie to me.'
Dick was silent, finishing his stretch and getting back to his feet.
'It should be the end of it.' He said.
'Unfortunately, what should be and what actually happens are often different things.' Said Slade. 'I presume it was this conversation with your teammate that pushed you over the edge?'
Dick nodded, a grimace on his face. He would never blame Cyborg for his breakdown, but he knew that conversation had been the final straw.
'Have you ever told anyone what happened to you?' Slade asked, trying to be gentle but direct.
'I told you, I saw a shrink.'
'Oh, I know you told them the basic facts. But have you ever shared what actually happened? What did you feel? What you were thinking?'
An alarmed expression crossed over Dick's face. 'Have you even said out loud what happened to you? Without the mask.' Dick's expression answered this question for him.
'Some things shouldn't be said out loud. They just need to be forgotten.' Dick mumbled.
'But you're not forgetting. You're letting it fester inside you. Does it make your skin crawl? Is that why you have the water so hot when you shower, to make the itch go away?'
Dick's eyes were wide, and his mouth hung open slightly. How the hell did he know all of that? He took a step back as Slade came forward, but the older man caught his arm gently.
'I told you, I've seen many things, Richard.' His voice was gentle, but his look was intense. 'There is nothing you can say that would shock me, nothing that would make me judge you, or think any less of you.'
They had shared eye contact for a few more seconds, then Dick looked away and nodded.
They didn't talk any more after that. Slade was content that he had planted the idea in Dick's head that he should share his thoughts. Now, he just needed to wait until the boy was ready. They had cleaned up (he noted that Dick had the water temperature a lot lower this time) and had dinner. Seemingly still in thought, Dick went to bed.
Now Slade was stood above him, looking down at the sleeping child. Because that was what he was, despite everything he was capable of, Dick was still a child. He pulled the blanket over the kid's shoulder and shut the curtain around the bed. He gave a quiet groan as he got into bed himself and finally let himself fall into slumber.
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Wally stared at the Bat. Surely, he had misheard him.
'What do you mean he's with Death Stroke.'
'For the moment, it appears the Terminator has put his work to one side. For some reason, he wants to help Dick, and I believe he is telling the truth.'
'So, you're going to leave him with Death Stroke the Terminator?' Wally's voice was verging on hysterical. There had been a time when simply being in Batman's presence was enough to reduce him to a nervous, silent wreck. After so many years of being friends with Dick, this was no longer the case.
'No, I am still going to track him down, but I am less worried about his immediate safety.' He cleared his throat, somewhat regretting his decision to update Young Justice on their progress of finding Robin. 'For whatever reason, Slade actually seems to want to help him.'
'Well, if Slade really did see Dick try to kill himself, then his concern makes sense, considering.' Said Artemis. They all looked to her.
'Considering what?' asked Batman.
'You don't know?' asked Artemis, shocked that she knew information that the Batman didn't. Sure, it was information she knew because of who her family was, but even so. She sat up, giving the whole room her attention. 'Slade's eldest son committed suicide when he was 18. Slade found his body.'
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Slade stared up at the black ceiling above him. With no windows in the base, it was hard to work out what time it was, but he didn't feel like he had been asleep for very long. He lay there a moment longer, letting his mind stay blank, hoping he would fall back to sleep. A small whimper from the other side of the room made him sit up.
'Dick?' he swung his legs over onto the floor and switched on the bedside lamp. The whimper came again, and Slade crossed the small gap and pulled back the curtain.
Dick was led on his back, he was stock still, but his eyes were wide with fear.
'Dick?' Slade knelt down, and for a moment Dick's eyes flit over to him, but then they went back to focus on something above him. It was then that Slade realised what was happening to the Boy Wonder.
'Dick, focus on me. Whatever you see, it isn't real.'
The boy let out another whimper as his breathing began to escalate.
'Dick, look at me. Don't look at it, look at me.' It took a few seconds, but Dick's eyes moved to focus on Slade. 'Good, keep looking at me. Remember it isn't real. It can't hurt you. Now I want you to grip my hand. Don't think about anything else apart from gripping my hand.'
He took hold of Dick's right hand loosely. 'Grip your fingers around my hand.'
For a moment Dick's eyes went back to the space above him and he whimpered again in fear. But Slade coaxed his attention back to him.
'Grip my hand, Dick. That's it, focus on your fingers, grip my hand.'
A small flutter of movement at a time, Dick's fingers began to close. When he finally had a grip on Slade's hand, it was like a spell had been broken. Dick sat up, finally able to control his body. Slade took hold of him, whispering to him that he needed to breathe.
Dick tried to push away at first, but after a few moments, he clung to Slade's shirt and cried. He cried and cried, all the tears he had built up since leaving Gotham, they all poured from his eyes. Slade held him, rocking him slightly and letting him cry himself out.
Finally, Dick's sobs died down and he just sat with his forehead pressed against Slade's chest. It felt oddly comforting. There had been a time when Bruce would hold him like this, back when he was younger and innocent.
Slade didn't let him go, he wouldn't until the boy tried to pull away. But Dick didn't pull away, instead, he spoke.
'It was in the manor, in my room, on my bed.' He whispered. 'He grabbed me, dragged me to my room and locked the door. He held me down on my bed. My face was pressed into the mattress, I could barely breathe.'
Slade resisted the urge to pull the boy closer and he listened.
'He took off my clothes...he was so strong, I couldn't stop him.' A new tear rolled down Dick's cheek.
'I can still feel him touching me. Feel him inside me. I can still taste him.' More tears rolled down to join the others. 'There was blood, it stained the carpet...' He took a deep breath. 'Then he left me on the floor; naked, covered in my blood and his....' A choked sob came from his mouth as he remembered the panic, he had felt upon realising the man was ejaculating inside his body. He shook, and he drew in more breath. 'Over three days he came in, he beat me and then force me down and...put himself inside me. Over and over again, every time he finished, he said that he was marking me as his.'
Slade swallowed quietly. What kind of monster does that to anyone, let alone a 15- year-old? Then to do it again and again, to violate him in every way possible and not even allow the boy the knowledge that his attacker was using protection.
'After I escaped, and he was arrested the police needed evidence. They did tests and procedures that were almost as mortifying as what he did. I felt so...tainted.' Dick couldn't stop. All these things that he had been holding in for over a year were all spilling out and he couldn't stop them. 'He was clean, but it didn't help. I can't forget how it felt, even hours after he'd left me, trying to remove all traces of him from my body.'
'Say it, Dick.' Slade whispered. 'You need to say it out loud, otherwise, it's going to keep haunting you.'
'I can't.' Dick whimpered.
'Yes, you can. You can get past this, but first, you need to accept what happened to you. Say it.'
Dick took a deep breath and gripped Slade's shirt tighter.
'I was raped. He kidnapped me, beat me and then raped me.'
Dick wished he could say he felt better. That admitting it out loud was like a weight off his shoulders. But it wasn't, he felt the same. But now another person knew the truth, he didn't feel quite so alone.
'My son...' Slade said quietly. 'He was your age when he started showing signs of depression. He was self-harming, becoming reckless. I was too busy to notice.'
Dick said nothing and listened.
'He rang me, while I was on a job. He told me he needed me, that he didn't know what to do.' Now it was Slade's turn to take a breath. 'I told him I was busy, that I would come and see him when I got back from my job.' He sighed. 'I got back three days later, and I went to see him. I found Grant hanging from a beam in his flat. He'd been there for days.'
Dick pulled away and looked at the man who was an enemy of the Batman. Suddenly, the world didn't seem so black and white.
'I let him down. I wasn't there for him.' Slade continued. 'So, you see why I want to help? From the moment I saw you walking in the rain that night, and I stopped you ending your life, I knew I couldn't walk away. I couldn't...I can't let another boy die. Not like that.'
Dick stared at him, still wondering why Slade had opened up so much.
'I told you in the car, I would tell you why I'm helping you if you told me why you wanted to jump in front of the train. I'm a man of my word.'
They sat in silence, the darkness around them oddly still. There was no going back now. They knew each other's secrets. Wordlessly, they both got back into bed. Dick kept the curtain open and Slade kept the light on. They both drifted back into sleep, feeling more comfortable about their situation. Both knowing that they needed the other but also knowing that the other person needed them just as much.