Request by AbigailVanbaugh
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" I shouted. "DEAN YOU COULD OF GOTTEN YOURSELF KILLED? AND THEN WHAT WOULD HAVE I HAVE DONE? WHAT WOULD SAM HAVE DONE?"
"It's my life! I'll risk it if I want to!" He shouted back at me, a little bit quieter than me though.
"IF YOU RISK IT THEN ME AND SAM WOULDN'T HAVE YOU ANYMORE DEAN!" I shouted, running my hands through my hair in frustration.
"You two would of gotten on just fine!" Dean defended himself.
"YOU REALLY THINK THAT? GOD YOU CAN BE SUCH AN IDIOT!" I shouted.
"AND YOU CAN BE A BITCH!" He shouted in return.
I couldn't lie and say that didn't hurt a little bit. I mean, being in love with Dean Winchester wasn't easy.
"GOD DAMN IT DEAN!" I screamed, turning away from him.
"I DON'T NEED YOU! AND NOBODY EVER WILL!" He screamed at me.
I turned around in enough time to watch him grab his jacket and leave the hotel room with a loud bang of the door. In frustration, I shouted and punched the wall, making pain shoot up my arm but I couldn't find it in me to care. My back hit the wall as I slid down it, tears threatening to fall from my eyes.
Why did I have to say those things? All I wanted was to keep him safe. I thought to myself.
The tears finally began to fall down my face, as my whole body shook with sobs. I have no clue how long I sat there, but it was for a very long time. My eyes were trained on the silver sun poking out of my jacket across the room.
What would happen if I just died? Dean said he didn't need me, Sam doesn't need me, Cas doesn't need me. What's the point anymore?
Before I could actually consider it, I was crawling on my hands and knees towards the gun, and picking it up. It felt a thousand times heavier than it actually was and it seamed to click in my mind just how dangerous this object was.
I took a deep breath and I must of blacked out for a moment, because the next thing I knew the cold mental of the barrel was touching the bottom of my chin. The tears still fell as I considered what I was about to do.
My thumb cocked the gun and the bullet fell into place. More deep breaths were taken as I tried my hardest to convince myself this was the right thing to do, I was doing everyone a favor.
My finger moved towards the trigger and just as I convinced myself to pull it, the gun was knocked across the room.
"NO!" I screamed and tried to dive for it.
But I was wrapped in a pair of very warm arms. Sobs racked my body as I leaned onto the figure, who held me close.
"What are you doing? Why would you do that?" Dean exclaimed as he held me.
"Y-you Don't need me." I mumbled before another sob broke through.
"I lied Okay? I lied. I was mad and I lied. I need you Y/N. Sammy needs you. Cas needs you. We all need you. I'm an idiot. We love you so so so much. Promise me you'll never do anything like this again?" He muttered.
It surprised me how genuine his tone sounded.
"Promise." I whispered.
"I love you so much. I need you. I love you. I need you." He kept mumbling these things over and over again, rocking me back and forth.
His voice sounded so broken, so fragile, it broke my heart to hear.
"I love you too, Dean."