The scopolamine did not fully flush itself from my veins for the next four or so hours. It was difficult to keep my thoughts straight in my head. On one hand, it was nice not to be worried for once, to have the hyper awareness the downtown disaster left me with lifted away. On the other, mindlessly doing whatever I was told was not a precedent I wanted to set.
The boys were on edge when we made our way outside for dinner. Death wasn't anything new to any of us, but the possible repercussions of Sokol's execution were widespread. Should his body be found, he could be traced back to Lex, and that would be the end of any peace we found out here.
The night was fragrant with blue smoke wafting from Carlisle's cigarettes, and so warm the red silk of my dress stuck to my lower back. I sipped from Lex's wine glass as the meal went on. Despite my first experience with red wine, the rich merlot didn't feel as though it was having any effect on me. It went down easily, and before I knew it, I'd finished the glass.
I didn't talk much after dinner. While the other three downed coffee and whisky, I drifted instead to the rail at the stern of the boat. The unnamed guard in charge of our navigation was moving us to a new location, a cove Carlisle had found, where we would be well hidden. The churn of the water behind us made a rhythmic hum in the night. I rested my elbows on the guard rail and watched the lights of the village on shore dim.
"Are you alright?"
I jumped. Reuben was leaning on the rail next to me. He'd changed out of what I understood to be the guard's uniform; black pants and a—usually half—buttoned white shirt. The loose collar of his tshirt drooped over one should, revealing a scattering of tattoos.
"I'm fine." I said, barely audible over the sound of low laughter coming from behind me.
"It's always hard, seeing your first kill."
I let out a snort. "I've seen people die before."
"But you've never seen them killed." He turned, so he was facing me. His posture remained relaxed, but his tone took on an intense quality. "You know we would all die for you, Ruth."
This took me by surprise. I though at best they were neutral to me, at worst considered me little more than a prisoner.
"You would?"
Reuben looked at me for a long time, and then lifted a shoulder in a half-shrug. "You really don't know the effect you have on people, do you?"
Before I could answer, an arm draped over my shoulder, startling me. Lex pulled me to his side, and kissed the top of my head.
"Come to bed." He said. "It's late."
When I looked back towards Reuben, he was gone, sitting once again next to Carlisle.
"Good night." I said, as we passed by the table. They were a hazy blur of candles and faces.
"Good night, Ruth. Sleep well." Carlisle called.
I wasn't sure, but I thought I heard Reuben mumble "those two won't be sleeping."
I tripped on my own feet as we crossed the threshold into the hall, catching myself on Lex's arm.
"You're drunk." He said, turning. My back was against the wall, one of his white-clad arms next to my head.
"I am not." I protested, unable to keep myself from laughing.
"You are." Lex brought his hand to the back of my neck, guiding me down the hall. The carpet was rough under my bare feet, and more than once I stumbled over it. When we reached the doorway, I balked.
"I'm not sleepy." I protested.
Lex sighed, and dropped his hand from my neck to pinch the bridge of his nose in false exasperation. "I know."
"I want to see the stars." I said.
"Now?"
"Now." I confirmed. "Outside."
Lex stepped back out into the hall, closing the door behind him. As he reached for me, I danced away from his reach.
"Stars first." I said. I wasn't sure which way the middle deck was, only that it was towards the bow of the ship. I'd only been there once; we stuck to the two upper decks. The middle deck was small, hidden from the rest of the boat by the curving of the sides. It was effectively useless for anything but sunbathing or, as it was, stargazing.
I found the deck by chance. The white double doors opened behind me as I balanced myself on the wall, tumbling me outside with a yelp.
The night sky spread over us like a glimmering bowl, cloudless and clean. So far from any cities, the milky way splashed in a bright arc over our heads. The moon was full, and it hung in a honey-yellow drop, so vibrant that it lit up the whole deck. I stood in the light, feeling nearly translucent in the humming night.
A thrumming beat made me turn. Music was playing through hidden speakers near the railing rich and deep. Lex sat on one of the chairs pushed near the wall of the boat.
"Happy now?" He asked.
I smiled wide, turning in a circle, head tipped to the sky. The combination of the wine and the music left me dizzy, uninhibited. I rose onto my tiptoes, and leaned to the railing, gazing into the sea below us. It rushed by in white foaming peaks.
"Ruth." Lex called. "Don't lean too far."
I pushed away from the flimsy metal, letting the momentum carry me until I was standing above him. Without breaking eye contact, I gathered my hair onto the top of my head. The breeze alighted on my now bare neck, and blew soft wisps of hair into a halo around my face.
One of the straps on my dress slid off my shoulder. As I reached to fix it, Lex grabbed my wrists, stopping me.
"Don't." He said, and gave a little pull. Without resistance, I fell forwards. He caught me before I could pitched to the ground. His hands were solid on my waist, my knees on either side of his legs. Any second I could slide off the chair, fall sideways, but by some miracle, I held on. My dress slid up my legs, the silk smooth on my thighs, crimson in the dark.
We didn't say a thing for a long time. I tipped my head back to look at the stars, marveling at the vast array above us.
A sharp pain in the hollow of my throat pulled me down from the cosmos. I jolted backwards on reflex. Lex's hand, low on my back, was the only thing stopping me from falling to the deck. I touched the tender spot on my neck. It was a familiar pain, sweet in its fading.
"You," he said, brushing my hand away, replacing it with his own. "Are mine."
The slight pressure on my neck left me punch-drunk. The lingering smell of cigars, tobacco and vanilla made it hard to breathe. Light-headed, I dropped my head to his shoulder and giggled.
"I know," I said into the stiff collar of his shirt. "I know, I know."
In a movement so abrupt I almost fell again, I pushed myself backwards off the chair, standing barefoot, my dress sliding down both shoulders now. Moonlight dappled the deck, the beat of the song changing into a slick, low male voice.
Neither of us moved; Lex's eyes were black in the dark, trained sternly on my face.
The boat shuddered to a stop, and just like that, the moon sank behind a mountain. We were in the cove, the only sound the music.
Lex stood. He was so close I had to look up at him.
"Come to bed." He was hoarse. "Please."
I bit my lip. A flare of fire lit in his eyes, and he pulled me to him by the strap of my dress. A tearing sound rent the air, and I looked at my shoulder. The silk strap had torn free. The back of the dress fell to the side, cool air blowing up my spine.
"My dress." I said.
"I'll buy you a new one. I'll buy you a hundred new ones, if you'll just come to bed." Lex took my jaw in hand, thumb dragging over my bottom lip.
I knew then, that I couldn't resist him anymore. And I knew he couldn't resist me. The power of that knowledge burned in my chest. I smiled wickedly, reaching behind me and tugging at the zipper of my ruined dress. It stuck, and with a gentle ripping sound, the seam on the back came loose, weakened by the broken strap.
It dropped to the floor in a puddle of red. Lex closed his eyes, dropped his hands to my bare waist, fingers catching on the velvet strap of my bralette.
I was warm, the wind from the motion of the boat dead, leaving stifling late summer air.
"Oh, you." Lex breathed. "Inside. Now."
There was no force in his voice, but no room to disobey.
I started towards the door, but he had a hand around my waist, holding me back.
"Not like that." Lex looked around. "Stay here."
I was alone on the deck, drunk, under the stars, music still playing. The boat rocked with the tide, and I went to the very end, at the point of the stern. The metal rail chilled me where it pressed my bare hips.
Below, the water was black metal, unbroken. I stared, listening for the splash of night time fish.
A hand, flat on my back, cupping my jaw as I turned. Lex, behind me and then kissing me. There was a shirt in his hand, and he dropped it as I wound my fingers into his hair. Both his hands found my waist again, one between my shoulder blades.
"Not here." He said.
Stars above. Water below.
Cool cotton sliding over my head. The neckline was too big, slipping over one shoulder.
"My darling. My fiancée." Lex murmured into my neck. "I am marrying you this week. On the deck of this boat, if it comes to that."
"So soon." I said, distracted.
"I can't wait any longer."
I put my hands on his cheeks, and looked him dead in the eye, searching for a hint of facetiousness. There was none.
"This week, then." I agreed. "And not a day longer."