Chapter 2 - A fresh start
"Ugh," I grumbled as I searched for my box of clothes. I needed to find something to wear to school, but it seemed like my clothes boxes had disappeared. The outfit I had on yesterday was ruined by pizza sauce and the lingering smell of a long car ride with my parents.
I dug through the unopened boxes, hoping to come across something suitable. Finally, I stumbled upon my old clothes from my freshman year in Highland. Unfortunately, that was back when my mother still picked out my outfits, and they were overly preppy and cheerful.
I let out a sigh, feeling like I had no other option. Who knew if those clothes would even fit me anymore.
"Honey, do you want a ride?" my dad's voice came from behind the door.
"I'll walk," I replied, feeling the pressure to find something to wear in that box.
"Okay, have a great first day,"Dad said, I listened to his footsteps walk away.
After some searching, I found a plaid skirt and a small tee shirt. The skirt was a bit short, but it seemed like my only choice. My thighs had definitely filled out since my freshman days, so there was no way I could squeeze into my old pants.
As I quickly changed into the plaid skirt, I realized it was shorter than I remembered. The tee shirt was snug but wearable nearly covering my midsection.
With my outfit thrown together, I grabbed my backpack and headed out the door, trying to ignore the mystery of my missing clothes.
I made sure to avoid my mother as much as possible. I had already endured her nagging during breakfast and didn't want her to see how tight my clothes were – she'd have a meltdown.
As I walked, I turned on my Walkman, eager to drown out the deafening silence of the suburban neighborhood.
Passing by the neatly trimmed lawns and identical houses of the suburban neighborhood, I couldn't help but feel like an outsider in my mismatched attire. But the music provided a shield, creating a bubble of my own little world amidst the staleness of the surroundings.
Approaching the school building, my heart began to race with fear. The bustling students surrounding me were all engaged in conversations, chatting away.
I took a deep breath and reminded myself that high school was all about survival. I adjusted my Walkman, making sure the music was loud enough to drown out any potential whispers about my outfit. With a determined stride, I pushed open the heavy school doors and entered the bustling halls.
The familiar scent of floor cleaner mixed with the chatter of students filled the air. I tried to keep my head down, avoiding eye contact as I navigated my way through the crowded corridors. The click of my shoes on the linoleum floor seemed to echo louder in my ears than the music blaring from my Walkman.
As I made my way towards the principal's office, I focused on putting one foot in front of the other, trying to block out the stares and whispers around me. The sound of my heartbeat seemed to drown out everything else as I approached the office door.
With a shaky hand, I knocked lightly on the door, hoping that the principal would be helpful. Moments later, the door creaked open, revealing a middle-aged woman with a black bob, rectangular glasses and serious eyes.
"Can I help you?" she asked, her voice firm and commanding.
Summoning all the courage I had, I took a deep breath before stammering, "Um, hi, I'm new here. I... I need to get my schedule and locker assignment."
The principal, Ms. Li, nodded at me with a serious expression. "You must be Miss Gates. I am Principal Li," she confirmed, motioning for me to follow her inside. As I entered her office, the scent of bleach mixed with the sweet aroma of red vines filled the air.
Seated in front of me was a slim boy with black spiky hair. He turned his head and our eyes met. He exuded an air of coolness that made my heart race.
"Mr. Lane, you can head to class now," Principal Li said abruptly, her tone unwavering.
The boy, Lane, gave me a quick nod before grabbing his backpack and leaving the office. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of curiosity about him, but I quickly pushed the thought aside as Principal Li turned her attention back to me.
"Please, have a seat," Principal Li said, gesturing for me to take the chair Mr. Lane had just vacated. She then moved around to face me behind her desk.
I took a seat, feeling a mix of nerves and anticipation as Principal Li settled in the seat behind her desk. Her serious demeanor made me wonder what kind of first impression I was making.
"First and foremost, welcome to Lawndale High," Principal Li's voice took on a strangely high-pitched tone, filled with awe and reverence as she emphasized the name Lawndale. "Secondly, your attire is not suitable for school. While I appreciate students experimenting with different styles, this outfit is excessively revealing."
I felt a flush of embarrassment creep up my cheeks as Principal Li's words sank in. I pulled my skirt to cover my thighs. I had hoped to blend in, not stand out for the wrong reasons.
"I-I'm sorry, Principal Li," I stammered, feeling a knot of anxiety tighten in my stomach. "I didn't mean to... I just couldn't find anything else to wear."
Principal Li regarded me with a stern expression, her gaze unwavering. "I understand, Miss Gates, I don't know how things were in Highland but we have a strict dress code here at Lawndale High for a reason. It's important to maintain a level of professionalism and decorum in our learning environment."
I nodded, feeling a sense of shame wash over me. I had wanted to make a good impression on my first day, but it seemed I had missed the mark entirely.
"I'll make sure to follow the dress code from now on, Principal Li," I said, trying to keep my voice steady despite the embarrassment gnawing at me.
Principal Li nodded in response, her expression softening slightly. "Good. I appreciate your understanding, Miss Gates. Now, let's go over your schedule and get you settled in."
As she began to go over my classes and timetable, I couldn't help but feel annoyed at her firm approach. I guess I just had to make sure I followed all the rules.
"I looked at your records and I must say we are very excited to have such a high achiever at our school" she beamed, I melted into my chair, I knew I was smart but I hated being reminded "I've seen you want to go to Bromwell, we would be honoured in making that happen in whatever way we can"
I sat there, stunned by Principal Li's words. I hadn't expected her to be so supportive, especially after my wardrobe mishap.
"Thank you, Principal Li," I managed to say, a mix of gratitude and surprise coloring my voice. "I... I appreciate that."
She smiled warmly at me, her serious demeanor momentarily replaced by genuine kindness. "You're welcome, Miss Gates. We're here to help you succeed in any way we can, all in the name of Lawndale High."
As we continued to discuss my academic goals and potential opportunities at Lawndale High, I couldn't help but feel a sense of hope bubbling up inside me. Maybe this new school wouldn't be so daunting after all, especially with the support of Principal Li and the faculty.
"Thank you for everything, Principal Li," I said, offering her a grateful smile as I gathered my things to leave her office.
"You're welcome, Miss Gates," she replied, her smile unwavering. "I assume you will be auditioning for our end-of-year musical?"
My body froze, and my heart sank. I had tried so hard to avoid any mention of theatre... my mother's passion for me.
I felt a wave of panic wash over me Theatre was never my thing, and the thought of putting myself out there in front of a whole new school was terrifying.
"Um, well, I..." I stuttered, trying to come up with a response. But before I could gather my thoughts, Principal Li continued, her tone enthusiastic.
"We're always looking for new talent to showcase in our productions," she said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "I'm sure you'd make a fantastic addition to the cast, Miss Gates."
I forced a smile, my mind racing with excuses and ways to politely decline. But the pressure of Principal Li's expectations weighed heavily on me, and I found myself nodding in reluctant agreement.
"I'll... I'll think about it, Principal Li," I said, hoping to buy myself some time to come up with a plan. "Thank you for considering me."
Exiting Principal Li's office, my racing heart finally began to calm. Inhaling deeply, I tried to steady my nerves. The school bell chimed, jolting me back into a state of panic – I was going to be late for class.
Feeling the urgency of the bell, I quickened my pace, trying to navigate the maze-like corridors of Lawndale High. My mind raced with thoughts of the upcoming audition and the pressure to fit in at my new school.
As I rushed through the halls, I couldn't shake the feeling of being a fish out of water. The students around me seemed to move with ease, chatting and laughing as they made their way to class. Meanwhile, I felt like an intruder in my revealing outfit, without my Walkman I could hear everyone so clearly now.
Scanning the hallway for the right classroom, I finally located it. A wave of relief washed over me, but as I entered, I realized that everyone was already settled in their seats. An empty desk awaited me at the front, causing my cheeks to flush with embarrassment. The thought of all eyes on me as I walked to the front made my heart race.
Taking a deep breath, I summoned all the courage I had left and made my way to the empty seat at the front of the classroom. With each step, I could feel the weight of everyone's eyes on me, their whispers echoing in my ears like a harsh reminder of my wardrobe mishap.
"Tommy, isn't that that girl from Pizza King" A heard a voice, I cringed at the name Tommy. I didn't need any remarks from him or his friends.
Ignoring the whispered comments, I focused on reaching the empty seat as quickly and inconspicuously as possible. With each step, my heart pounded in my chest, and I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks.
As I finally reached the front of the classroom and slid into the empty seat. I felt a wave of relief.
"Look at that body" another voice said "Tommy you have to tap that"
Feeling a mix of embarrassment and anger, I tried to block out the inappropriate comments around me. I knew I had to focus on starting fresh at Lawndale High, not on the unwelcome attention from my classmates. Taking a deep breath, I tried to shake off the uncomfortable remarks and concentrate on the lesson ahead.
The teacher turned around from the chalkboard, his gentle face and kind eyes meeting mine.
"You must be..." he began, glancing down at his attendance sheet, "Marilyn Gates."
As the teacher's gaze fell upon me, I felt a sense of relief wash over me. His kind eyes and gentle smile put me at ease, contrasting with the uncomfortable comments I had just heard.
"Yes, that's me," I replied, feeling grateful for the teacher's welcoming voice.
"Welcome, Marilyn," he said warmly, his voice reassuring. "I'm Mr. O'Neil, your English teacher. I hope you're settling in okay."
I nodded, thankful for the teacher's friendly approach.
Mr. O'Neil smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it in no time. If you have any questions or need help, feel free to ask."
"Mr O'Neil, she should introduce herself to the class" A familiar voice rang out, I knew it was Tommy. I wanted to sink into my chair.
"What a thoughtful and excellent idea, Tommy," Mr. O'Neil responded, radiating positivity. "Please stand up and share something about yourself, Marilyn."
Feeling a rush of nervousness at the thought of introducing myself to the class, I stood up slowly, my cheeks flushed with embarrassment. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my voice as I faced my new classmates.
As the jocks at the back, including Tommy, began to wolf whistle at me, my initial impulse was to slap those smug faces. However, I knew that violence, paired with my revealing outfit, was not the welcome response at this school.
"Hi, I'm Marilyn Gates," I began, my words coming out in a rush. " um, I moved here recently from Highland "
"What is your innermost desires Marilyn?" Mr O'Neil said looking at me in a supportive stare. What sort of first day question was that?
Feeling a mix of surprise and discomfort at Mr. O'Neil's unexpected question about my innermost desires, I paused for a moment, unsure of how to respond. The jocks' inappropriate behavior in the class only added to my unease.
"I... I suppose my deepest desire is to find my place here at Lawndale High," I answered tentatively, struggling to maintain my composure under the watchful eyes of my classmates. It was definitely a cop-out response, but it was better than saying nothing. Yet, it did prompt me to start questioning what my passions were.
Mr. O'Neil nodded thoughtfully, his kind eyes reflecting understanding. "A noble aspiration, Marilyn. Remember, this is a safe space for you to explore and grow. Don't hesitate to reach out if you need any support."
"I know where she belongs," one of the jocks snickered to his friends. I saw Tommy give him a high-five, and I felt a wave of sickness wash over me.
"Get over yourself," an alternative girl with long black hair spoke up, confronting the jocks. Until that moment, I hadn't really noticed the other students in the room; my focus had been solely on the jocks.
The girl's boldness seemed to catch the jocks off guard, and for a moment, the classroom fell into a stunned silence.
Mr. O'Neil, sensing the tension in the room, cleared his throat and addressed the class in a firm tone. "Let's remember to treat each other with respect and kindness, regardless of our differences. We are all here to learn and grow together."
The atmosphere in the classroom shifted, the initial discomfort gradually fading as Mr. O'Neil redirected the focus back to the lesson. I couldn't help but feel a sense of annoyance towards him for handling the situation with no confrontation for the rude remarks.
As the class continued, I tried to focus on the lesson, my mind still reeling from the events of the morning. Despite the rocky start to my first day at Lawndale High, I found a glimmer of hope in the small acts of kindness and support I had encountered.
The girl with the long black hair caught my eye and offered me a reassuring smile, a silent gesture of solidarity that warmed my heart.
As the bell rang, signaling the end of the lesson, I gathered my things and prepared to face the rest of the day. I needed to find my locker.
"Hey," a blonde girl said, approaching me. Her sudden appearance caught me off guard, causing my books to spill out of my bag. As I bent over to gather my belongings, I suddenly realized I was inadvertently flashing everyone left in the classroom, including the jocks.
"Tommy, what did I tell ya about city girls?" one of the jocks remarked, and they all turned their attention towards me. Hastily collecting my things, I heard the jock comment, "She's basically begging for it."
Feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over me as I realized the unfortunate situation I had unknowingly put myself in, I quickly gathered my fallen books and stood up, cheeks burning with humiliation. The jocks' leering gazes only added to my discomfort, and I wished more than anything to disappear in that moment.
The blonde girl who had initially approached me must have sensed my distress and abruptly walked away, leaving me feeling abandoned. What a bitch, my hopes of making new friends quickly diminished.
Feeling utterly mortified and abandoned by the girl who had initially seemed friendly, I hurriedly made my way out of the classroom, desperate to escape the judgmental stares and crude remarks of the jocks. As I navigated the crowded hallways, I couldn't shake off the feeling of being an outsider in this new environment.
Finding my locker felt like a small victory amidst the chaos of my first day, but even as I stashed my books away, I couldn't shake off the embarrassment of the earlier incident. My mind raced with thoughts of how I would face the rest of the day, let alone the rest of the school year, with such unwelcome attention directed towards me.
"I wish I could apologize for the unwanted male attention you received today, but that would only excuse their behavior," the black-haired girl from class remarked, leaning against the locker next to me. "The worst part is that Principal Li doesn't address their behavior because they are the best team she's had in years."
Grateful for the unexpected support from the black-haired girl, I turned to her with a small smile, touched by her empathy amidst the chaos of my first day.
"Thank you," I said softly, my voice laced with genuine appreciation. "It's been... quite a morning."
She nodded sympathetically, her expression understanding. "I hope you didn't think that Lawndale high was going to be a grand big session of the Brady Bunch"
I chuckled "And here I was hoping that we would all be signing and holding hands by the end of the day"
"Don't let Mr. O'Neil catch wind of that wish, it might just come true," she said with a wry smile. "I'm Monique, by the way."
"I'm Mary..." I started to say.
"Marilyn, I know," she interrupted, winking at me. "Looks like we'll be in most classes together," she added, glancing down at my schedule in my hands.
"Why don't we hang out?" she suggested confidently. There was a certain effortless coolness about her that made me feel surprised and grateful that someone like her would want to spend time with me.
Monique's offer to hang out was like a ray of sunshine breaking through the clouds of my chaotic first day. Despite the rough start, her presence felt like a lifeline amidst the sea of unfamiliar faces and judgmental glances.
"I'd like that," I replied, feeling a sense of relief wash over me at least someone wasn't afraid to be seen with me.
"What sounds you been listening to on your Walkman?" Monique said picking up my Walkman from my locker.
"Nothing like some Nine Inch Nails, in all their positivity to get one pumped for their first day of school" I replied with a corny grin.
Monique's eyes lit up with excitement as she examined my Walkman, her cool demeanor never faulting. "Nine Inch Nails, nice choice," she remarked with a grin. "Not what I was expecting at all."
As we chatted about music and shared our favorite bands, I felt a sense of connection with Monique that I hadn't expected to find on my first day or any day. Her easygoing nature and genuine interest in getting to know me made me feel like maybe, just maybe, things would start looking up.
Feeling a tad self-conscious, I glanced at my reflection in the locker mirror and couldn't help but mutter, "Damn, look at me."
Monique, ever cool and collected, shot me a puzzled look. "What's up?" she asked, her tone nonchalant.
"Couldn't find my usual threads this morning, so this mishmash is all I had to work with," I explained, attempting to discreetly adjust my skirt to offer a bit more coverage.
But Monique wasn't having any of my self-doubt. "Nah, you're rocking it," she reassured me, effortlessly boosting my confidence. "It's got that Anna Nicole Smith vibe, totally badass."
I couldn't help but chuckle at her comparison, but deep down, I was still worried about everyone's reaction to my unconventional ensemble. It had already gotten too many unwanted remarks.
Without missing a beat, Monique offered a solution. "I've got a denim jacket in my locker," she said, gesturing towards her stash. "Might be a bit warm for today, but it'll cover up any bits you're not feeling."
Grateful for her quick thinking, I followed her lead and watched as she retrieved the jacket. Slipping it on, I instantly felt more at ease, like I had found the missing puzzle piece to my outfit.
"Thanks, Monique," I said, flashing her a genuine smile as I looked down at the faded baggy denim jacket on me. "You're a lifesaver."
She simply shrugged, a smirk playing on her lips. "Hey, us woman have to look out for each other"
The sound of the bell jolted us back to reality, signaling the end of our brief moment of bonding. With a shared smile, Monique and I gathered our things and prepared to head off to our next class together. I couldn't help but feel grateful for her unexpected friendship on a day that had started off so rough.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
As we entered our next class together, I felt my stomach get intese butterflies squirming. I saw that Lane boy from earlier, he was sitting at a desk staring into the ceiling.
As I walked into the class with Monique, I couldn't help but steal a glance at Lane, the cool boy from earlier. His easy confidence and focused demeanor as he just sat there, and I found myself drawn to him despite my best efforts to focus on where I was going to sit.
Monique must have noticed my distraction because she nudged me playfully, snapping me out of my reverie. "Anyone home Marylin?," she teased, a mischievous glint in her eye.
I blushed slightly, embarrassed at being caught staring. "Sorry, I just... he seems so... cool," I admitted in a hushed tone, hoping Lane wouldn't overhear.
Monique followed my gaze and chuckled softly. "Yeah, he's definitely got that mysterious artist vibe going on," she agreed, her tone tinged with amusement.
"Hey Trent" she said walking up to him and giving him an unenthusiastic weave dripping with coolness.
Of course they knew each other, look at both of them. They are the coolest people I had ever seen. I felt myself blush.
"Hey Monique" He said, his voice was smooth and husky.
Trent's gaze shifted from the ceiling to Monique, and I couldn't help but notice the subtle hint of a smile playing on his lips.
"New friend?" he inquired, his voice smooth and unbothered.
Monique shrugged nonchalantly, her black hair falling effortlessly around her shoulders. "Marilyn, meet Trent. Trent, Marilyn," she introduced us with a playful smile.
I hesitated for a moment, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement at being introduced to Trent. "Hi, nice to meet you," I managed to say, trying to match his calm demeanor.
Trent's eyes met mine, and there was a brief moment of silence before he spoke. "Likewise," he replied, his voice holding a hint of curiosity.
"Hey it's city girl" Tommy Sherman said walking past me and sizing me up with his eyes.
Tommy Sherman's sudden comment caught me off guard, and I felt a wave of discomfort wash over me. His gaze made me feel exposed and uneasy, as if he was scrutinizing every detail of my appearance.
Monique shot Tommy a sharp look before turning back to me with a reassuring smile. "Ignore him, Marilyn. Tommy's just a typical jock, all bark and no bite," she whispered, trying to ease my obvious discomfort.
"Actually I was coming to ask if you wanted to come hang after class.... With the football team" He said confidently "The cheerleaders want to meet you"
Tommy's unexpected invitation to hang out with the football team and meet the cheerleaders left me feeling even more flustered and uncertain. The thought of being surrounded by all those people, especially after his earlier comment, made me nervous.
Monique shot Tommy a skeptical look, clearly unimpressed by his attempt to draw me into their social circle. She turned to me with a raised eyebrow, silently questioning my thoughts on the matter.
I struggled to come up with a response, feeling torn between the desire to fit in and the discomfort of being put on the spot. The idea of meeting the cheerleaders, who seemed like a whole different world from me.
Before I could gather my thoughts and reply, Trent spoke up, his voice calm and steady. "Thanks for the offer, Tommy, but I think we have other plans," he said firmly, a hint of protectiveness in his tone.
Tommy seemed annoyed by Trent's Comment "I wasn't asking you Lane, I'm sure Marilyn wants to hang out with a real man"
Tommy's comment was met with an uncomfortable silence that hung in the air, the tension palpable as his words lingered in the classroom. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks, a mix of embarrassment and frustration bubbling within me.
Monique shot Tommy a sharp look, her eyes flashing with a hint of anger. She opened her mouth to respond, but before she could say anything, the teacher spoke up, his voice steady but firm.
"We do not have TIME for you to harass the new Student Tommy" The teacher said abruptly. He looked like he was going to have a nervous breakdown any minute "everyone sit down"
The teacher's sudden interruption brought a sense of relief to the tense atmosphere in the classroom.
Tommy, taken aback by the teacher's direct response, mumbled before slinking back to his seat, his usual cocky demeanor deflated.
Monique shot Tommy one last disapproving look before turning to me with a reassuring smile. "You are way to a cool to hang with the narcissists" she whispered, her voice filled with empathy.
I nodded, grateful for Monique's support and the teacher's intervention. The teacher started his lesson, not making any attempt to introduce himself to me.
As the teacher began his lesson, the tension in the classroom gradually dissipated, replaced by a sense of normalcy and routine. I appreciated the teacher's swift intervention. I loved history but found it hard to concentrate on the lesson with all that had happened today and we hadn't even had lunch. The teacher also seemed really agitated and it was hard to focus to his voice.
I noticed a folded up piece of paper on my desk. Had I been so lost in thought that I hadn't noticed who put it there.
I opened it. The handwriting looked cursive and the i's had been dotted with love hearts.
'Sit with us at lunch,
From the Fashion Club"
I rolled my eyes at the name of the club, how could there possibly be a club for fashion as an extra curricular activity? I also thought this outfit would not even bother popular people to confide my existence.
As I read the note inviting me to sit with the Fashion Club at lunch, I couldn't help but feel a mix of amusement and skepticism. The idea of a club dedicated to fashion as an extracurricular activity seemed both intriguing and slightly comical to me.
Monique noticed my reaction and arched an eyebrow, clearly amused by my eye roll. She leaned in and whispered, "Fashion Club, huh? They are the worst."
Monique's comment made me stifle a giggle, relieved that she shared my sentiments about the Fashion Club. Despite my amusement, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of curiosity about who these club members were and what they were like.
"Is something funny?" The teacher said abruptly look right at me
The sudden interruption by the teacher caught me off guard, and I quickly composed myself, trying to suppress any traces of amusement. "No, sorry sir," I replied, my voice slightly shaky from the unexpected attention.
Feeling the teacher's stern gaze fixed upon me, I straightened in my seat, a sense of apprehension settling in. Monique shot me a quick supportive glance, silently encouraging me to maintain composure under the teacher's scrutiny.
The teacher's expression remained unreadable as he continued the lesson, the weight of his attention lingering in the air. I focused intently on his words, trying to push aside the distraction of the recent interactions and the note from the Fashion club.
As the class came to an end Monique leaned over her desk and looked me straight in the eyes "we know it's your first day- but do you wanna skip third period with us?"
Monique's unexpected offer to skip third period with her caught me off guard. Despite the allure of spending more time with her and possibly getting to know Trent better, I hesitated. Skipping class on my first day seemed risky, but the thought of exploring this new school dynamic with Monique was tempting.
I glanced at the teacher, who seemed engrossed in packing up his materials, oblivious to our conversation. With a mixture of nerves, I turned back to Monique and shook my head. "I think I should at least go to all my classes today"
I hope this wasn't going to make them hate me and look like a brain, I needed to keep my grades up. I was still waiting for my acceptance letter to any of the collages I had applied for. I needed to do my best so I could leave this town.
"Maybe next time" Monique said, she was a little disappointed but seemed to understand.
I gathered my belongings, ready to move on to the next part of the day. Monique and Trent exchanged a few words before turning to me with friendly smiles.
"See you around, Marilyn," Trent said, his tone warm and inviting, yet still cool.
"Yeah, definitely," Monique added, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
With a wave, I headed out of the classroom, feeling a sense of excitement mingled with apprehension about what the rest of the day held. Despite the challenges and uncertainties of navigating this new school environment, I knew I had made at least two possible friends in Monique and Trent.