Steam pooled around Haley's feet as she stepped from the bathroom into the hallway. It had taken her almost half an hour to scrub off the spots of paint she had collected during the project. The day was crossing over into evening and the glow of house lights could be seen from the windows. No noise came from Matt's room, but Haley didn't find that surprising.
As she headed downstairs to find food, she heard movement coming from the kitchen. When she entered she found her mother pulling down a stack of plates and setting them on the counter. The air was filled with a spicy scent that made Haley's stomach rumble. At the sound of her, Haley's mother turned around.
"Hi sweetheart, you hungry?" she asked. "I picked up some Mexican. I thought we could eat and you could tell me how this project of yours is going?"
At the offer, Haley felt her heart lighten. But she didn't let the feeling grow too much, history telling her not to.
"You don't have work to do?" she asked.
Her mother let out a tired breath. In that instant, her face dropped and Haley could see the strain that had replaced the once bubbly person she knew.
"For now, it can wait. At least for an hour or two."
Trying not to seem too eager, Haley nodded and joined her mother, gathering utensils and napkins. As they moved about, she could almost feel the warmth that had once lived in that kitchen all the time. They were just dividing food when the front door opened and closed. The sound of footsteps proceeded Haley's father as he appeared. His suit jacket was over one arm and his tie had been loosened.
In the archway he stopped, his eyes landing on his wife. There was a tension in his body that spoke of more than just a long days work.
"Tess," he said, "we need to talk."
The words weren't firm or harsh but Haley felt as if the ember of warmth had been smothered. Haley's mother looked at him, then as if thinking the same thing, their eyes flickered to Haley and back to each other. With that fleeting look, Haley felt her spark of hope fizzle and die. Her heart clenched and stomach became a bottomless pit.
"Our room," he said.
Without another word, he left. Haley's mother looked at her, face tight with stress and exhaustion.
"I'm sorry, sweetheart," she said. "When we're done talking we can eat."
Haley was already shaking her head.
"It's fine," she said, bottling up the thoughts that wanted to pour out. "I have homework to do anyway."
Giving Haley, a weary, half-hearted smile, her mother left. As she slipped through the archway, Haley felt her mind explode in a hundred different ways. The force of them hurt her heart. Feeling as if the storm in her mind was going to overtake her, she grabbed her food and darted upstairs. Leaving the plate on her desk, she dug around for her headphones and put them in.
After she climbed onto her bed, she buried her face in her hands as pulsing music filled her ears. She willed the rapid-fire lyrics to distract her, muting the endless tumble of thoughts. Part of her wanted to scream, to let loose the feeling of hopelessness that was building inside her. But she buried the desire further down, not wanting to add to the pain the walls already carried. She fell back on her bed, eyes closed trying to hold back the storm.
The minutes slipped away as one word chased another and one song followed the next. By the time Haley pushed herself up again it was dark outside and her food was stone cold. Her body felt drained, the wave of emotions leaving her depleted. She pulled her earbuds out, her thoughts having run themselves into exhaustion. There was no sound from downstairs and she didn't know if that was a good thing or bad thing.
Through her balcony doors, she could see Jace's darkened room. Her eyes traveled up and she could see a sliver of the sky and the freckles of stars across it. Tiredly, she climbed off her bed, leaving her music behind. Outside the air was a soft blanket of heat. Distant noises from the neighborhood reached her. Hearing Isaac's voice in her head, she laid down on the balcony.
For a long while, she let the twinkling of the stars consume her. The vastness of the sky seemed to capture her pain and store it away where no one would find it. As she stared at the sea above, the ache in her chest diminished. The stars stared down at her, making her feel infinitely small under their knowledge and longevity.
Lights around the neighborhood switched off one by one and still, Haley didn't move. Even the yellow glow beneath her died and she was left with the stillness of the night. A purr of a motorcycle filled the air and then cut off. Still, Haley remained laying on the balcony. A light popped on in Jace's room. Even though she didn't look over, she could hear him moving about. After a few minutes, the door to his balcony opened.
"Haley Day," he said. "Are you aware you're laying on the balcony?"
"Yes." Even to her own ears, her voice sounded small.
Jace wandered out and leaned against his railing peering at her. If Haley had glanced at him, she would have seen the troubled frown that appeared on his face. But she didn't look over.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his tone quiet.
"Watching the stars."
"Any specific reason?"
She shook her head. Jace nodded but said nothing. Haley heard his retreating footsteps and saw the light go out. Before she could think she was alone again, Jace was back. Kicking off his shoes, he tossed them back into his room. He dropped to the balcony and laid down, resting his hands behind his head. They sat in the silence of the night.
Haley didn't know how long it had been when Jace spoke.
"Do you know any of the constellation names?"
"No, do you?"
He pointed up to the star at a line of three stars.
"Orion's belt." After pointing to another cluster, he dropped his hand. "And the Big Dipper but that's it. Pity Isaac isn't here."
Surprised by the statement, Haley turned her head towards him. "Why do you say that?"
Jace remained staring at the sky as he spoke. "Because he's an astronomer. Well, close to it."
"How do you know that?"
A soft chuckle left Jace. "I've known Isaac since elementary school. I think it was one of the first things he said to me when we met."
Despite her weary state, Haley felt a tug at her lips.
"It hasn't changed since then," he said. "We talked about it last semester."
"You two talk?"
"Yeah, I help him with Spanish and he helps me with science."
"Oh."
Jace focused on her, his mouth turned into a teasing smirk.
"You sound surprised."
Haley gave an awkward shrug. "Well, yeah. You two don't seem like the type to naturally be friends. You are part of different groups."
As he watched the stars, Jace ran a hand through his hair, then replaced it under his head.
"That doesn't really matter when you've known someone for the majority of your life."
Haley couldn't respond, the words trapping her. She had technically known who the people she went to school with for most of her life but she felt blocked by barriers. Why was it different for them? Was it cause they were guys? Her thoughts sent her drifting away from Jace, following a line of thinking that was safer than what was back inside. Her silence must have been loud because Jace glanced over.
"What are you thinking, Haley Day?" he asked.
It took a second for her to pull herself out of her own head.
"It's nothing."
She wondered if he would fight her on the denial but he didn't. Instead, he continued to study the sky. They lapsed back into quiet.
"Are you happy, Haley Day?" Jace asked, after what felt like hours.
Though early that day she would have said yes, the events of that evening changed it. She frowned.
"What kind of question is that?" she asked, twisting her neck to look at him.
He met her gaze. "It's a question like any other."
"No, it's not," she said. She raised her eyebrows. "Are you happy?" Before he could speak she was already shaking her head and looking away. "Never mind, of course you are."
"You say that with complete certainty."
"Yeah, because I am certain. Just look at you, your life. Of course, you're happy."
Jace didn't respond for a moment, his expression a mixture of wry and somber.
"I'm happy despite things in my life," he said.
"That sounds like you have struggles. Which seems impossible. You're Jace Cortez after all."
Jace shook his head. "Name or not, everyone has struggles. Sometimes they look different than people think."
There was something in his voice that made Haley pause. His face showed no signs of his emotions but there was something in the way he didn't look at her that made her curious.
"What are your struggles?" she asked, her voice low as if giving him the option to pretend he didn't hear it.
When he didn't say anything, she wondered if that was what he was going to do.
"The future," he finally said.
Haley let the words slip away into the air, being carried off into the night by the wind.
"Are you worried you won't ever be the top dog once you leave high school? That sort of thing?"
A sardonic smile gave to Jace's face.
"No," he said. "I know high school is only a phase that will end. I don't plan on it being the best part of my life. What I'm talking about it what I do afterward? What career do I take?"
"Doesn't really seem like a struggle to me, you have your family's restaurant to manage and own."
"I told you struggles look different. Cause what I face is whether I do has my whole family expects and study business then go into the restaurant industry?" He held his hand up as if asking the stars for guidance. "Or do I do baseball even though there isn't a guarantee that I will make it into the major leagues?" He dropped his hand onto his stomach. "It might not seem that big of a deal to anyone else, but to me, it's my life and I don't have a clue what to do."
Haley was struck by this, feeling as if the same emotion had been dogging her for the last few months wherever she went.
"I never would have guessed," she said. "You always seem to know what you're doing."
"In high school, I do. That world is easy to deal with because there's really nothing to decide. I go to class and do sports. Simple. But afterward...I don't know."
She didn't say anything, feeling as if there were nothing to say. The quiet returned and they both sat in their own thoughts, staring up at the sky. Minutes passed by but neither of them felt like moving or leaving the sanctuary of their balconies. Haley's mind wandered and it eventually floated over to the boy across from her. A question popped into her head and she broke the silence with it.
"Where were you?" she asked.
"Bryce's birthday party."
Her forehead creased. "You came home alone and sober?"
"Give me some credit, Haley Day, I'm not completely stupid. I own a motorcycle, I wasn't about to ride it drunk."
"Oh...right. And being alone..."
Picking up a stray twig, Jace spun it in between his fingers absently. He shrugged and that seemed to be all the answer he was going to give. Haley stared at him, as he rolled the stick between his knuckles, trying to puzzle him out. Eventually, her question got too heavy to hold and she dropped it.
"Why do you do it?" she asked.
Jace didn't look at her, still toying with the twig.
"I do a lot of stuff, you'll have to be more specific to get an answer other then 'cause I can'."
For a second, Haley thought about letting her curiosity go but she couldn't.
"Why do you...you know..." she said. The twig stopped twirling. "Never mind, it's a stupid question, you're a teenage guy, that's just what guys like you do."
There was a tension in Jace's posture that Haley found surprising, though his face remained unchanged from its passive state. He lowered his hand, the small piece of stick falling to the ground.
"Do you know what happens with when girls come over to my house?" he asked.
Haley scrunched her face. "I pride myself on the fact that I never think about it."
Jace stood, his face calm but something in his stance speaking of his annoyance.
"Yet you judge me for something you don't even understand," he said, his voice even.
Haley sat up. "I live across from you. I understand the signs pretty clearly."
Staring at her, Jace shook his head. "No, you don't. You assume you see everything. And that's what makes you wrong."
He walked into his room and closed the door, leaving Haley alone in the darkness without any response.
**********************************************************************
Hey there Timmy Turner!
(Fairly Odd Parents)
Oh jeez! Can Haley just be put down? I mean come on, Haley Day why do you have to always be making a muck of things! It was going to well until you had to go and shove your WHOLE FOOT IN YOUR FREAKING MOUTH! Gosh darn it woman! 🤦🏽♀️
You're with me right? Let me here what you think? 👉🕳👈
Question of the chapter is by RichieHomes: Why are you this wonderful?
Answer: Well, I'm dearest Richie, cause it's easier than being something else. And honestly, I don't know. It's like how life is, you can't really see yourself until someone acts as a mirror to you.
So am I wonderful? I actually don't know. If you say I am I guess I'll accept it. But I know the annoying, petty, snarky, mean, selfish sides of myself and so sometimes I don't think I am. It's nice to know that there are good sides! ☺️
Now you answer: why are you so wonderful? Cause you are to me! I mean you read my books and put up with my oddness! That's a pretty wonderful thing to me, so why do you do it? I want to know!
If you feel like voting, commenting, following then I'll think you more wonderful, but honestly I already think you are pretty dang wonderful so even if you didn't do this it wouldn't change anything!
More glasses!!
Even though it's a puppy he looks like an old man 😂