Waking up,
To harry and my puff of snow.
Was really just a normal day. Like always, I was laying in my bed, also like always, I got up and wandered around the mansion of horrifyingly yet weirdly nice murderers.
It was a nice morning, it really was.
Until Mr. I can smile but you can't as well as me dragged my ass into his room.
I gasped and posed like an anime waifu, expecting him to yell his undying love to me like everyone else should-
But alas, the disappointments can only disappoint.
"Look, [Y/N], I have to get rid of these things because Masky saw them and that son of a bitch probably won't shut his mouth about this, so I'm getting you to go bury them in the woods somewhere."
He gave me about 10 or something fucking maid outfits.
T e n.
I didn't know he had more than that one I saw that day-
"Make sure that nobody sees you." He said. It'll all be fine, he said.
"You do realize that it's pouring outside, right?", my glare can probably pierce his very soul from the intensity of it.
He smirked, "But of course! You're our maid after all, so you should be able to take care of such simple tasks, right?"
I smiled as sweetly as I could, and told him I'll do it, and even in a special way so nobody could find out.
I'm going to have fun.
"Jeff, at least open the door."
"Open it yourself, I'm too lazy."
And so, the ballerina legged [Y/N] had opened the door so damn majestically, that even the killer couldn't comprehend it.
The poor girl almost fell 5 times, and got her foot stuck on the doorknob because she couldn't get it down.
"F u c k you, J e f f r e y-"
I couldn't close the door because it was open on the inside of his room.
"I don't even care anymore, goodbye-"
And the door got slammed shut right in front of my face. Perfect.
I stood there looking at the clothes carefully packed in some plastic bags, probably for three minutes, until Sebastian showed up and I got an idea.
"Oh, hi [Y/N]." Trust the horned boi to not care.
"Hi Seb. Could you help me open my door, and come in my room, just for a while?"
Now kids, learn that even if it sounds like some plan to steal that dude's clothes and wallet, I'm a weak piece of shit that got kidnapped by him.
L e a r n.
"Sure, why not?"
And so we entered my not-so-evil lair. Cue le not so evil laugh.
I threw the maid outfits next to the door and sat on my bed, patting the space next to me. Seb understood my message since he sat himself down, facing me with a confused stare afterwards.
"Look," I began, "since Jeff is a little bitch, he can't take his business clothes out of his room by himself. I'm responsible of disposing of this evidence."I pointed to the small pile of neatly packed outfits.
"Do you plan on getting people to wear maid outfits to mock him?"
The mischief in his eyes was surprising. I doubt he knew he was going to do it as well, though.
I grinned. "Gather up about five of the guys, and bring them here." I went to pick up the clothes to hide them for a while, "We're going to show off our mad maid skills. And Jeff will be our special someone to impress."
He chuckled at my obvious awesomeness and went out the door, not forgetting to be polite and wave.
And so began the shitfest. We were all probably going to hell after this horrible idea.
But as any idea that comes to visit and stay in my head, it's hopefully going to be a success or I'm going to be a ghost by the end of the day.
My search for the holy men and women began. The chosen ones were just awaiting to be chosen without knowing.
On the living room couch sat a Ben with Jeff's apparent dog. Ben was playing some video game while smile dog was asleep at his feet.
We're getting a maid dog. And elf.
The blonde hylian greeted me with a smile and hello, and asked me if I wanted to play with him.
"My good friend, you have been chosen for a good cause. While I won't give you information about the event yet, will you join? And take the dog with you?"
I was kneeling with a royal look in my eye. I was going to make this shit sound official. Just watch me.
He shrugged. "Sure, why not?"
After I told him to go to my room, he picked the fucking dog up and bolted away. Two down, about 3 more to go.
Contemplating whether I should include Sally in this or not, I realized she was but a child and shouldn't be cursed with such horrifying imagery.
So I went to the best option in the world. Slenderman.
His office was nearby anyway, so it just meant less walking for me. I'm not sure if he'd agree or not, since he's the responsible guy, but that doesn't matter to me.
I walked to the door, puffed up my chest and knocked on the door.
Instead of having it be open, I got teleported inside. This bitch wants me to get a headache today, doesn't he?
Sitting in front of me was the almighty owner of the slender mansion, reading a book while he was probably supposed to file in some spaghetti documents.
He looked up at me, took off his glasses which he probably wore just for show and proceeded to place his reading material on the table to show that he's paying attention.
"Do you need anything, child?"
Oh, I need many things my guy.
"Mr. Slendsy, I wish to invite you to take part in an absolutely stupid idea of mine for today. If you do somehow wish to do so, I assure you, I will be more efficient in my tasks as a maid. What do you say?"
I just want to see you in a maid outfit, really.
He nodded his head. "Anything else?"
What the fuck is wrong with all the men here?
"Hold on- wouldn't you at least consider anything? Like uh, the fact that I could make you do some s-"
"Dressing up as a maid to show Jeff something he has hidden from me should be good enough."
This is an amazing thing to witness. And here I was, thinking he'd be like the fictional stories make him be. Serious, disappointed, but he actually seems like a great guy.
"Thank you. Would you mind going in my room until I am finished with recruiting other maids? And please, don't tell the others."
He nodded his head once again, and teleported me out. My head is literally spinning. What the f u ck-
I saw a Dark Link walking towards me. I grinned.
His face showed utter f e a r of me. "What are you doing?"
I'm doing many things, really. Breathing, standing on my own two feet, looking at you. You know, regular stuff.
"I want to invite you to participate in my plan to piss somebody off. Won't give you details, but I assure you that you'll have fun once we start. You in?"
He shrugged.
"Go to my room."
He waved and went up the stairs.
I got 4, so should that be enough? Probably. It seems empty anyway, so I guess Sebby has done his job as well. Time to skidaddle-
I walked up the creaky steps of the staircase, capable of hearing my own heartbeat, intensely preparing myself to open the door to my room.
The walls seemed to be closing in as I wasn't having any patience for this.
I heard something behind me and I bet I jumped a few feet in the air, before sprinting to my room.
I open the door and close it behind me once I'm inside.
The room was full of guys, except for Jane. Jane was just awkwardly sitting on the bed, probably thinking this was some form of war in preparation.
Sebastian has gotten Masky, Hoodie, Toby, Jane and apparently snowpuff.
It is time to prepare for war.
<><><>
After 27 long years, I have finally published a chapter. Aren't you all proud of me? I've made it a little longer than usual as a small apology for my inactivity. The whole chapter has just a little over 1400 words.
I'm not leaving this book alone until I get at least 50 chapters posted. I'm not leaving some of you hanging. I know the feeling.
Anyway, I shall see you all later. By e-