"What does the Queen want to talk to me about?" Lilia asked curiously. She knew that having the Queen asking for her wasn't exactly a good thing. Being surrounded by people who she didn't trust at all didn't help as well, so it was simply stupid and pointless.
"Marriages, I think" Lilia nearly choked in her own saliva when she heard what Jamie has replied. Why would the Queen want to be involved in marriages?
"Why would the Queen talk to me about marriages?" she questioned even more confused. Cersei despised her profoundly, so why would she be concerned with her marriage or her opinion on marriages or whatever she wanted to know? Well, on second thought, it gave her something to torment her about so... she wouldn't pass such an opportunity, would she?
"You and your sisters are part of the Queen's household along with Princess Myrcella. It's normal that she asks for you to be present" it made sense in Lilia's mind. Even if the Queen wanted to see her in order to torment her, Lilia had decided that she wouldn't give her the pleasure, of that she was sure. She wouldn't break or show her true feelings.
He escorted her to the Queen's chambers where she found Cersei drinking a goblet of wine. 'No wonder she is a good match for Robert', Lilia thought. She had come to realize that the Lannister Queen never stopped drinking. King Robert on the other hand, only stopped drinking when it was time to eat.
"Lilia, darling. Have a seat" the woman indicated. Lilia did as she was told and took a seat in front of the Queen, who handed her another goblet full of wine. "Drink"
"Thank you, but I'm not thirsty, Your Grace" she politely declined, earning a smirk from the blonde lioness. Cersei didn't like the young girl's guts. It annoyed her. She knew that there was more to Lilia Stark than she would lead on, so she needed to figure those things out and she needed to do it fast. She needed to find a way to control her, or else, she would turn into a problem.
"I didn't offer you water, did I?" the Queen arrogantly questioned in order to make a point. Lilia, seeing herself without any choice, poured a good portion of wine down her throat so that the Queen wouldn't bother her anymore. Cersei smiled with satisfaction at the good understanding from the young lady. "Good. I've heard you are soon to become a woman, a true woman. Are you excited, my dear?"
"I'm aware that many Lords have asked my father for my hand in marriage. Nevertheless, all the negotiations are in his hands and since negotiations are very delicate matters, I don't know if I'm actually going to be married soon" she tried to run from the subject and get the conversation over with as soon as possible.
"Oh sweet girl, was that what your father's told you?" the Queen asked as she drank more wine. She almost looked truly bothered with Lilia's current situation, actually, the girl would have believed her if she didn't know who she was talking to enough to do so. "You know, my father told me the same thing years ago and here I stand"
"My father is not Tywin Lannister," Lilia said as she drank more wine, making the Queen smirk. 'Spiteful, little bitch', Cersei thought as she tried to control herself.
"No, indeed, you're Ned Stark's daughter" Cersei pointed out as pressed her teeth together in order to control the eagerness she was feeling to throw the girl out of the window. "And I heard he's planning to marry you to Willas Tyrell"
"I heard he was one of the many suitors lining up to lick the King's and the Hand's boots" Cersei smirked at the girl's remark. She was a spiteful, little bitch, but she was also a perceptive girl. Probably, the only thing she liked about the Stark girl.
"I see you're not very excited about it" the Queen points out as she watched the girl look at her cup, meeting her eyes after. It felt like the girl was thinking about some witty remark, even though Cersei had already realized that she often gets lost in her own thoughts. It was annoying, at least in her eyes, but no one else dared to say anything, including her drunk of a husband. "I don't blame you, marrying a crippled man is not exactly living a fairytale"
"Fairytales are for children and I'm not a child, Your Grace" 'just like her bitch of an Aunt', Cersei insulted her in her mind while giving her a fake smile. Lilia knew she was annoying the Queen, but she also didn't care in the slightest. In fact, she was enjoying it dearly. "And to speak quite frankly, I don't care if my future husband has a bad leg, as long as he has a good heart and is gentle, I'm satisfied"
"No, you are not" Cersei stated as she tried to find a way to put the Stark girl pack into her place so that she was remembered that she couldn't speak her mind to the Queen. "Have you ever met your betrothed?"
"No, Your Grace" she replied sadly, earning satisfaction from Cersei. She was eager to provoke the Stark girl, see how she would react to her.
"It makes things more complicated, I suppose. You'll be strangers when you meet and before you know it, you'll be saying the words" Lilia's grip over the goblet of wine tightened. Thinking about being a stranger to her husband on their wedding day was terrifying but Lilia knew that she couldn't allow the Queen to see what she actually meant by that. "I heard you have met Ser Loras Tyrell, what did you think about what he had to say? Soon, you'll be brother and sister after all"
Lilia swallowed dryly. How could she have eyes and ears everywhere all at the same time? She felt like she couldn't do anything at all because she always had someone trying to control her and watching her every move. Oh, how she missed Winterfell dearly... No one would meddle into her private matters, they wouldn't spy on her. No one really cared to begin with, and even if they did, they wouldn't dare to do so because they would pay a huge price if she learnt about it or even dreamt about it. Back home she was in control of her life... more or less... yet, she wasn't a pawn to be moved accordingly.
"Ser Loras told me about his family and how they would like me" Cersei giggled at that. Lilia Stark wasn't as foolish as Sansa, but she had certainly much to learn if she wanted to survive the Game of Thrones. "Especially the Queen of Thorns"
"Say that to Lady Alerie" Cersei let out, making Lilia furrow her forehead in confusion. Loras hadn't told her anything about his mother, except for the fact that he had to attend her name day's celebrations. "What? Did he not tell you? Lady Olenna hates her daughter by law. Everybody knows that I thought you did too. Don't this kind of gossip reach the North?"
"I have no idea what you're talking about, My Queen. The truth is that in the North we're closer to wildlings than to King's Landing, and therefore information never reaches our doorsteps" Lilia replied politely. She knew that Cersei was just trying to make her rebel against her own father, refusing to marry the Tyrell boy, she knew that all she ever did was manipulate people. She knew that she could not trust the Lannisters, especially Cersei. And so, she promised she wouldn't trust her kindness for it was, most likely, fake.
"Oh, sweet, little pup," Lilia noticed the hidden disdain behind the word 'pup'. She knew that 'little pup' was just a way of diminishing her. What the Queen didn't know was that, even though it bothered her, Lilia was already a master on finding nicknames that diminished people's status. For example, when she named Joffrey little cat. The difference was that she could never say that out loud, otherwise, she would suffer great consequences, and the Queen could say what she pleased and Lilia had no other option but to swallow it with proud and pretend to be a fool.
Lilia couldn't lie, the truth was that Cersei's insinuations made her feel unsure and eager to convince her father to call the betrothal off. She had grown more tolerant over the marriage matter, and when she met Loras Tyrell and heard all the wonderful things he had to say about his brother, she thought it was a good opportunity for her to escape people's pretensions for her future.
If Willas was as kind-hearted as she had been told, then that marriage would be great for her. She would finally flee the Capitol and that nest of vipers. She would finally leave the city of the plotting and backstabbing. She would start another chapter of her life and leave peacefully.
"You mustn't believe everything people tell you" Cersei advised her. "People told me Robert Baratheon was beautiful, intelligent and a great warrior. Yet, here we stand today and you know exactly who he is"
"I don't understand... Ser Loras is kind and strong, and honourable, he wouldn't lie to me about such things... if he were to lie to me, then he wouldn't have been so open about his brother being a cripple..." she defended him straight away. 'How naïve', Cersei thought. She saw a lot of herself in the Stark girls, especially in Sansa. Sansa's wish was to be Queen and marry Joffrey, almost like Cersei when she was a girl. But Sansa was too perfect and flawless, yet to be corrupted... a pure soul in a cruel world, of that she was sure.
Lilia Stark was, unlike her younger sister, a major issue. She wanted to be perfect and avoid power at all costs. Cersei knew that she wanted Joffrey away from her, she wanted to keep her distance from the throne. Nevertheless, the Lannister woman knew better. She knew that once conflicts grew thicker, the girl would eventually become a woman, and she would rise.
She had warned her twin about it, and even though he said to her every time that it wasn't going to happen, she knew better. Someone who owned such beauty, who could easily submit men to her commands without even trying... once she matured, she would show her true colours... colours that she probably didn't even know about herself.
"Oh, he may be all that but know that there is more to a man than the one he leads on, especially when he's trying to convince you of something" the Queen explained. "I'm going to tell you a story. When I was a girl just like you, I was promised Raeghar Targaryen, the heir to the crown. The people loved him and sang songs about him in the streets. He would walk around the common people without fearing for his life. He was a good man and every girl in the Seven Kingdoms dreamt of him. Back then, my father was The Mad King's Hand, and therefore he had influence in all of Westeros. I was told I was going to wed the Prince... and then he married Elia Martell"
"Take no offence, My Queen, but you were foolish. I didn't have to meet him to know that Raeghar Targaryen wasn't a good man" she tried to hold her tongue. Lilia had grown up being confronted with the crimes the Targaryens committed regarding her family. She knew what they had done, starting by what they had done to her uncle and grandfather, and finishing off by what they had done to her aunt. The North remembered as well, but her father refused to touch the matter. It had been buried with the Mad King years prior, and it had officially died once his dear sister did too.
"Perhaps you were right, I should have known better... and so should have your Aunt Lyanna" Cersei tested the waters. She knew that Lyanna Stark's death was something that made the rest of the House uneasy. But Lilia... Lilia wasn't going to let her know anything else. She was going to keep it short and not let her emotions drive through. "The day he won the tournament and passed by his wife, Elia Martell, just to put a crown of Winter Rose's on Lyanna's lap. That day, Lyanna should have known to keep her distance, yet she smiled at him.
"I know where the story ends. He abducts and rapes my aunt Lyanna to the point where she dies" the girl said not looking at Lannister woman, who was nostalgic. Cersei never liked Lyanna, she envied her pretty heavily actually, which was one of the main reasons that made her dislike Lilia Stark once her eyes met the girl's figure. She didn't open her mouth, she didn't look at her or did anything inappropriate, she just stood there naturally... almost like a ghost that had come back from the dead just to torment her.
"No, little pup, the story doesn't end there. When your aunt died, the Rebellion was over and Robert became the King of the Seven Kingdoms. He needed his Queen and so, my father stepped in and offered my hand in marriage. Robert Baratheon accepted and I knew that was the happiest day of my life" she recalled as she seemed to go back to that day. Cersei still remembered the day her father told her she would marry King Robert Baratheon and be his Queen. She felt like the luckiest girl to have ever lived. Every girl dreamt of Robert Baratheon and she was to become his wife. "He married me, yes, out of duty as had I. But he never really forgot his beloved Lyanna, did he? On our wedding night, he was drunk which would become a usual thing but I didn't know that back then. I had never met him, you see? But as he climbed on top of me and did the little he could do, given the circumstances, he whispered a name... Lyanna. If it weren't from my children, I would have thrown myself out of the highest window in the Red Keep and be done with it..."
Lilia felt pity wash over her body. The Queen was basically confessing her all her existing problems, opening up to her, and she couldn't possibly imagine why she would do that. She had been married to the King for seventeen years, despising every day of her existence from that moment on. It was a miserable way to live a life, at least in Lilia's eyes. No one should have to go through such misfortune...
"I'm sorry, but where does this story fit our initial conversation, Your Grace?" Lilia tried to break the tension. Cersei Lannister looked like she was locked in another place like she wasn't even there. Truly, Cersei was reliving every moment she had told before and wanted to scream at herself and at her father. Being shipped off to Robert Baratheon had been one of the worse punishments she had been submitted to. The only good thing about that was the children that she had been blessed with, her precious children.
"I was once shipped away from my home to marry a man who has made me the most unhappy woman to have ever lived" Cersei spoke sincerely. "To men, our only role is to bear them children. And if we die during the process, who would care? We were only women, to begin with"
"My father loves my mother, had she died in labour and he would have been heartbroken" Lilia tried to point out. Cersei knew that there were husbands who loved their wives, she had seen it herself. She remembered the day her mother died, the way her father screamed at the top of his lungs while holding her lifeless body. He knew that the body he was holding as he cried over her death was the body of the woman whom he had loved, but that body wasn't her. Nevertheless, Cersei saw her father be weak for once in his life. From that moment on, he was never the same. "Not everyone is like King Robert"
"I know," Cersei said as she drank another goblet of wine. She had failed to torment the Stark girl miserably. Instead, she managed to torment herself. "I hope your husband treats you right"
"Thank you, Your Grace. So do I" she politely replied, making Cersei smirk in amusement. Lilia wanted to wash that smirk off that hateful woman. However, she seemed too fragile for the girl to fight back. She was better than the Queen, she wouldn't go so low. "Now, I'm very thankful for your concern, Your Grace but I don't need it because I have a mother and she'll be here soon enough"
"I hope so. You may leave, little pup. I shall see you around" Lilia bowed to the Queen and left the room, walking through the hallways with apprehensiveness and uncertainty in her heart. Was Queen Cersei actually being kind? Could she be genuinely kind?