John started to air guitar and hum a rock song.
"I can't believe this is happening to me," Claire said.
John stopped.
"Oh shit, what are we supposed to do if we have to take a piss?"
"Oh please," Claire said.
"You gotta go you gotta go."
I heard him unzip his pants.
"John!"
"Hey you're not urinating in here man!" Andrew said.
"Don't talk don't talk, it makes it crawl back up."
"John stop it," I said.
"You whip it out and you're dead before the first drop hits the floor!"
"You're pretty sexy when you get angry. Grr."
John turns to Brian.
"Hey homeboy. Why don't you close that door and we'll get the prom queen impregnated."
Claire turned quickly to glare at him.
"Hey! Hey!" Andrew said.
"What?"
"I lose my temper you're totalled!"
"Totally?"
"Totally."
"Why don't you just shut up, nobody here's interested," Claire said.
"Really? Buttface."
"Well hey Sporto, what'd you do to get in here, forget to wash your jock?"
"John," I said.
He quickly turned to me.
"What Jenny?"
"Don't harass them please."
"Yeah, what Jenny said," Claire said.
"Could we just write our papers?" Brian asked.
"Look, just because you live in here doesn't give you the right to be a pain in the ass so knock it off!" Andrew said.
"It's a free country," John said.
"The guy's just getting a rise out of you, just ignore him," Claire said.
"Sweets?"
Claire turned to John.
"You couldn't ignore me if you tried."
"He's actually right, ignoring him won't work," I said.
"You shut up, nobody likes you!" Andrew said to me.
"You say that to her again I'll kick the living shit out of you...So...so, are you guys like boyfriend-girlfriend? Steady dates...lovers? Come on Sporto, level with me. Did you slip her the hot beef injection?"
He whispered the hot beef part, I could still hear it.
"Go to hell!"
"Enough!"
John laughed.
"Hey, what's going on in there!?" Vernon shouted.
"Scumbag," Andrew whispered.
"I heard that Sporto," I said.
John got up and walked to the railing.
"Why don't we close that door, can't have a party without Vernon checking on us every few seconds."
"The door is supposed to stay open," Brian said.
"So what?"
"So why don't you just shut up, there's four other people in here you know."
"God you can count. See I knew you had to smart to be a wrestler. And...you forgot Jennifer."
"Who are you to judge anyway?"
"Really," Claire said.
"You know Bender, you don't even count, if you'd disappear forever it wouldn't make a difference. You may as well not even exist at this school."
I stood up, the hurt on my brother's face made me wanna pounce on Andrew like a lioness in the jungle.
"You talk to him like that again-"
"Same goes for you!"
"Hey, you got short term memory!? You can say shit to me all you want to but if you do it to my sister. I. Will. Kill you."
"No wonder they're alike, real world version of the twins from The Shining," Claire said.
"Well, I guess I'll run right out and join the wrestling team. Maybe the prep club too...student council."
"Nah they wouldn't take you."
"I'm hurt."
"You know why guys like you knock everything?" Claire asked
"Oh this should be stunning."
"It's because you're afraid."
"God you richies are so smart, that's why I'm not real heavy in activities."
"You're a big coward."
"I'm in the math club," Brian said.
"You won't join, you don't know anyone, so you just step all over them."
"I don't know any lepers either so I'm not gonna run out and join one of their fucking clubs."
"Let's watch the mouth huh."
"I'm in the physics club too," Brian said.
"Excuse me a sec. What are babbling about?"
"I just said I'm in the math club, the Latin club, and the physics club, physics club."
"I've always wanted to join drama club."
"You like theatre?" Brian asked me.
I nodded.
"I was Dorothy on my elementary school play of The Wizard of Oz. And the title character on Annie in middle school. Maybe," I said.
"Hey...cherry?"
Claire turned to John.
"Do you belong to the physics club?"
"That's an academic club."
"So?"
"So academic clubs are different from other kinds of clubs."
He pointed at Brian.
"Ah but to dorks like him, they are. What you guys do in your club?"
"Well uh, we talk about physics you know, properties of physics."
"So it's sort of social. Demented and sad but social right?"
"I guess you consider it a social situation. Every year we have this big banquet at the Hilton."
"You load up, you party."
"I don't get high or drink or anything like that. My cousin Ken, my cousin Kendall, he got high once. He started eating these weird foods and seeing weird things like The Twilight Zone kinda."
Claire turned to John.
"Sounds like you."
"Listen if Vernon comes in here we're dead meat. I got a meet this Saturday and I'm not gonna miss it on account of you boneheads!"
"Oh wouldn't that be a bite huh, missing a whole wrestling meet?"
"You don't know anything about it faggot, you never competed in your whole life."
"Oh I know. I have such deep admiration of guys rolling around the floor with other guys."
"Admit it. You don't have any goals."
"Of but I do. I wanna be just like you. All I need is uh, a lobotomy and some tights."
"You wear tights? Brian asked.
"No I don't wear tights, I wear the required uniform."
"Tights."
"Shut up."
We heard Vernon go out of his office. John sat in between Claire and Andrew in a hurry. When it was clear. John snorted, stood up.
"Whew!"
He walked towards the door.
"You there's not supposed to be any monkey business," Brian said.
"Young man, have you finished your paper?"
John started fiddling with the door hinges.
"Come on Bender don't screw around," Andrew said.
"What're you gonna do?" Claire asked.
"Drop dead I hope."
"Same goes for you, you sporty bastard," I said.
John walked back as the door shut.
"Bender, that's school property there, I don't think it should be toyed with."
John sat down at his desk, I did the same.
"You should go back up there and fix it," Claire said.
"You should really fix that."
"Am I a genius?"
"No you're an asshole!"
"What a funny guy!" John mocked.
"Fix the door Bender!"
"Shh, I've been in here before I know what I'm doing."
"John please," I said.
"Come on Bender-"
"Shut up!"
"God dammit!"
Oh uh, Vernon, here we go.