I wake up with a yawn, I woke up yet again last night but it wasn't as bad as usual, thankfully. I just stayed in my bed though, can't let Eric force me into his room again.
'How many times must I flipping tell you?!' the voice in my mind screams, 'he didn't force you, you wanted too, remember?!'
That's a small detail.
'Actually, it's a huge one.'
Today is visiting day, and since I have no family that would bother to come and see me, so I have the whole day off! Yay for me?
I decided to go shopping for clothes, everyone was raving over how the new line looked so cool, and there were even some that were 'super cute' so that sounds pretty safe... Since I'm still a transfer, I have, like, an unlimited amount of money so why not?
I limit myself to buying only two outfits though. But once I get there I almost rethink my idea. But I've never been huge on clothes so I'll just stick with the only two outfits.
I look through a few racks before going to try on a pair of black tights, a cute black mini skirt, this sweater-shirt, and knee-high black boots. I wish there were other colors, but then I spot a red leather jacket, and immediately pick it up.
The outfit is pretty cute, too dark for my taste, I wish there were some purples, but oh well. I put the outfit in my shopping bag, then proceed to look at some of the other outfits. I immediately spot a pair of black ripped jeans, and I can hear them calling my name.
'Olivia!'
'Olivia!'
So I pick them up, and a sparkly red crop top. I also grab a pair of cute black wedges, I always loved wedges but was never allowed to wear them back in Amity.
Walking out of the shop, all of that originally would've been about a hundred dollars, but I got it for free. I should probably stock up if it was going to be that expensive. I look around and see everyone rejoicing with their family members, the air was very happy and emotional.
"Olive," my blood runs cold.
I told myself repeatedly it wouldn't have happened. Over and over and over again. I jinxed myself. I stand up straighter, hiding the pained expression on my face.
"I thought I told you not to join Dauntless,"
"Why'd you come?" I growled out, narrowing my eyes.
"Aw, Olive," he coos, "it's visiting day for the families, remember?"
"You're not my family," I said quietly, "you're not even my father,"
"Well, that's technically true but I did raise you-" he shrugged his shoulders, and I looked at him weirdly.
"What did you just say?" I whispered, and he chuckled darkly.
"I'm not your father, sweetheart,"
"Who is then?" I scoffed, rolling my eyes.
"Why do you think she left Amity, hm?" He raised an eyebrow, and I looked away.
"You're lying," I stated, backing away from him.
"I wish I was," he grinned, "don't make a scene, dear,"
"Get away from me," I glowered at him, using a threatening voice.
"I would never treat my own daughter how I treated you, it was more of a... Punishment, to your mother, I never really loved her either though, it was an arranged marriage," he rolled his eyes, "but I'm not Raelynn's father either,"
"Unbelievable," I mumbled.
"Now, I told you not to leave Amity," he glared at me, and I looked away.
He's not my dad.
We're not related.
For a long time I was worried that I would become like him, that I would be abusive to my future family like he was. I was terrified, I had always said I would never start a family because of it, that I would never get married.
All because I thought I had his blood.
I began walking away, walking back towards the dormitory, ignoring him shouting from behind me. But my hand is yanked back, and I'm turned around back to the wall. My head held against the wall by his elbow.
"Stop," I choked out, my airway being cut off.
"You know, I warned you, why are you so... Surprised?" he grinned, and I spit in his face.
I quickly lift my knee up and lift it up to where the sun doesn't shine, kicking as hard as I possibly can. His grip on my neck loosens and he falls down, clutching in between his legs, a pained look on his face.
"Hey sis- oh my God," Raelynn gasps, running over to me, tilting my head back a bit and I wince.
"Careful," I let out, and she immediately lets go.
"Sorry," she stares down at him, "did he try to..."
"Yeah..."
She kicked him, and I look over at her with wide eyes.
"How can a father be so abusive to his own-"
"He's not our dad," I said quietly, and she looked up with a shocked expression.
"What? But-"
"Their marriage was arranged," I let out a dry laugh.
"Oh," is all she said, "I'll um... Take him outside of headquarters,"
He's still clutching himself in pain, and I roll my eyes.
"Oh, suck it up, buttercup," that's what he would always so to us, crazy how the tables have turned.
What am I doing? I don't want to turn out like him.
I'm still standing the hallway, running my fingers gently over my neck, hoping it doesn't leave red marks when a tall figure is standing in front of me.
"Via?" It seems far away, "Liv,"
And I'm back into focus, staring into the piercing blue eyes that seem to be looking into my soul.
"Eric?" I mumbled, and he raised an eyebrow at me.
"You alright there?"
"Mhm," the shock was... Well, shocking.
He's not my real father.
"I saw you talking to your dad," I nodded as he paused, "where was your mom?"
"She's factionless," I answered numbly.
"Oh," I nodded again, "how?"
"Wasn't very Amity," I scoffed remembering how it had happened.
People thought she had went nuts when she tried to explain that he was nuts. They didn't believe her, said she was 'breaking the peace' so they forced her out of the faction.
"Oh-" his words are cut off and he gently takes my neck in his hands.
"What're you-"
"Who did this?" He asked quietly, only it wasn't very calm, it seemed as though he was trying to control his... Anger? I guess?
"Um, what are you talking about," I questioned, acting as if I didn't know what he was talking about.
"Did someone try to choke you-" His eyes are intense on my own, and I look away.
"It doesn't matter, I handled it and I'm alive," I pulled away from him.
"Yes, it does!" He shouted, and I started to walk away, rolling my eyes.
He pulls me back to him and runs his fingers over the red mark, I flinch as he does. He immediately pulls his fingers away and looks at me with a twinge of guilt.
"Sorry,"
"It's fine," I pulled away, "thanks for caring, I think,"
Did I just say that? I guess I did...
"Seriously, what happened? Just tell me-"
"Eric," I snapped, "it doesn't matter! Forget about it!"
And with that, I walked away, and thankfully he didn't follow.
"Why do I have to do this so much? What's the point?" I groaned as Alex ushered me into the simulation room.
"It's just something we have to do," he plunged the needle into my neck and I hissed in pain, narrowing my eyes at him.
He's learned to not count me down, and to already have the needle ready, and to talk me through it. If he doesn't I basically end up almost in tears. Just someone getting the needle ready makes me want to cry, it's weird I know. It's also really baby-like but I hate needles.
"Jerk," I whispered before my vision become blurry and I'm thrown into the sim.
I'm in a room, it's illuminated by many bright lights, and the walls are all a sparkling white as well. It almost looks like Erudite headquarters, with their very modern-like rooms. I try to stand up but am held back by a pair of restraints that I haven't noticed until now.
A woman enters the room, her dark red hair straightened neatly, and her blue dress clinging to her body perfectly.
"Who are you?" I asked, and she glanced over at me before turning away.
She takes a needle, and my eyes widen. She prepares as slowly as she possibly can. She reaches leisurely into the cotton bowl, taking the piece into her hands delicately, before pulling it out, carefully placing it back down on the counter.
She takes some more stuff, slowly might I add once again. Tears are at the brim of my eyes, and I begin to wonder what she might be taking from me, or what she might be putting into me.
"Just... Running some tests," she said easily, and my blood ran cold.
"What kind?" She ignored me.
She slowly walked over to me, and I stared at the needles in her hands.
"Please don't," I mumbled, and she looked into my eyes, her stare was almost as if she wasn't even alive.
She stuck one into me, and I grit my teeth at the forceful gesture, she didn't even feel for the vein.
"Whoops, I don't think I stuck it in the vein," I glared at her, as she took the needle back out, and I blink the tears away from my eyes.
She stuck it again, and again, and again.
"I think I finally got it this time!" She cheered, and I realize I'm still restranied to the table I was on.
"Can you let me go?"
"No!" She barked, and I blink at her, and her face morphs into Jeanine Matthews, my eyes widen.
She takes my blood, and I feel uneasy, almost as if I'm going to pass out.
One tube, two tubes, three tubes, four, I think I'm knocking on death's door.
"That's too much blood," I whispered, feeling a bit light headed.
She continues, and I think she won't stop until she pulls out a pink colored tube.
She inserts it into me, and I scream out in pain.
"Good, it's working," she smirked, and I continued, the serum going through my system painfully.
I look down at the needle, wishing I could rip it out of me. Tears flood down my face, until I stop. It isn't real, it isn't real, it isn't real!
I screamed the thoughts over and over in my mind until that's all I can think about. I breathe in and out slowly, the pain fading away before I awake.
I jump up out of my seat, rapidly wiping the flood pouring from my eyes. I breathe in deeply over and over again. Using the breathing exercises I had practiced over and over again.
"How long do you think you were in there for?" Alex asked me, and I groaned before leaning my head back on the stool.
"I don't know," I said quietly, the pain lingering in my mind, I shuddered, "an hour? Two hours?"
He sighed, and I looked over at him, curling up into a ball on the chair I was sitting in, burying my head between my legs.
"Five minutes," my eyebrows shot up.
"What?" I raised my eyebrows.
"You need to learn how to control it," he whispered, and I shook my head.
"If I'm..." I paused, "Divergent... Then what are the other factions that I got?"
"Well," he clicked his tongue, "I think you got Amity, Dauntless or course, and Erudite, but you show signs in everything except for Candor, even though you're an awful liar,"
"Hm," I whispered, so four out of five factions.
"But then again, to be Dauntless you also need to be selfless too, so..." he shook his head, "I don't know, I didn't administer your results,"
It's like I'm a robot, I'm not actually controlling my movements. I find myself in the cafeteria, eating some of the leftovers from dinner which I had not attended earlier. It was currently two in the morning.
"So, you decided to have dinner?" A cold voice says from behind me and I shrugged my shoulders.
"I wasn't hungry earlier," I stated, and it was true.
I was Divergent, I might have four of the five factions running through my blood. It's crazy, and hard to understand, was it even possible?
I turned to Eric, his eyes already on my own, "Was it a nightmare?"
"It doesn't matter," I turned back around, grabbing a muffin, clenching my jaw, "I'll get through it,"
"You don't have nightmares when you're around me," he paused, "why is that?"
Why didn't I have nightmares around him? I mean, come on. Was it because I felt safe around him? Maybe?
"Maybe you're making it too big of a deal," I narrowed my eyes at him, "I'm fine, don't worry,"
"Nope," he shook his head, "uh, uh, let's go, you need sleep, I for some reason give you sleep, let's go,"
"Alright," I stood up stiffly, shocked at his demanding matter, why does he care so much?
Strong, warm arms, I loved the feeling for some odd reason. It was so comfortable and... Safe. Absentmindedly I traced his tattoos with my fingers, carefully outlining them, only to stop when I heard a deep breath behind me.
"What are you doing?" He asks, and wow his morning voice is hot.
I mean, I'm just saying...
"Nothing," I stopped, not knowing where to put my hands.
"So," he began, twisting me around towards him before standing up, "why didn't you come back to my apartment last night, and the night before last?"
"Possessive are we?" I laughed at his expression before sighing exasperatedly.
"Eric, you're a leader, a Dauntless leader, I'm an initiate," I shook my head, "it would be weird if someone found out,"
"They won't," he rolled his eyes, "besides, Dauntless are reckless, and it's not like we're doing anything,"
"I guess..." I mumbled, sitting up, stretching.
"Now, I'll make you breakfast," I watched him as he walked away, and I couldn't help but smile a bit.
I think I'm catching feelings for him, and I know it's weird and dangerous, but how could I not? He acts like a big, bad, Dauntless leader in front of everyone, but when it's just us he's... He's just so caring, and sweet.
And he's an amazing cook.