I Was a Mother
My pregnancy was in the third month and my belly has srarted to show. I hadn't told the King about it and not anyone except for Court Lady Song.
I had been wary for this pregnancy for the things that had happened in the past haunted me.
Will I be losing my child again or will I ever provide an offspring for the King? What if I couldn't protect my child again? These thoughts made me restless.
However, I decided to tell the King for he was the only one I could rely on in this place.
I requested Court Lady Song to go into the King's Residence and looked for Eunuch Han to arrange a secret meeting with the King. I couldn't afford to let anyone in the Palace discovered that I was pregnant as the news would probably reach the Queen Dowager like an arrow and I will be in danger again.
As I requested, the King dismissed all the Palace Maids and Palace Guards in the residence and only the King, Eunuch Han and Chief Guard Jin were there. Anyone could be the Queen Dowager's informant so I decided not to let anyone in there when I met the King.
I arrived before dawn, the King waited in his chamber.
"My Queen, what is the important matter that you request such arrangements?" The King asked, worried.
"Your Majesty, for everything that I will ask you after this, I hope you could agree without conditions," I took his hands and held tightly.
"What is the matter?"
"Your Majesty, I am with your child," I told him then his face turned bright.
"Is this not a haply news?! He exclaimed. "Oh, My Queen!" He pulled me into his embrace and I felt safe. How I wish time to stop right here right now.
Then he suddenly let me go and looked at my face curiously. "What you have in you mind?" He asked as if he knew what I was planning.
Then I told him. "Your Majesty, I want to go somewhere and take care of our child until he is safely born. I will take care of him and come back until he is strong enough to help you rule our nation."
"Does that mean you will leave me?" He studied my face for a while. "No, I won't allow it."
"Your Majesty!"
"I will take care the both of you now. This time I won't let anyone touches you," he was resolute.
"Your Majesty, I beg you to hear my explanation."
"My Queen, I..."
"It's my wish," I interjected. "It's not that I don't believe in you, My King. It's everyone else in this Palace that I distrust. After I knew I was with a child, I live each day in wariness, I'm in constant fear." My tears wetted my cheeks.
"I have to leave for us. I promise you that I will come home as soon as I can. Just let me go, alright?"
The King wiped my tears using his thumbs. He kissed my forehead, his lips rested there for a while. He pulled me into his embrace and hugged me tightly, "How will I live apart from you? I could go for a week but months or maybe years? No, just take me with you."
"Your Majesty," I sighed.
"I know," he said, "I know," he smiled wearily. "I will arrange everything but please, give me a month. Just a month to be with you and I will be the one to send you there safely."
I nodded at his request.