Dear NOT CLARISSA,
I can't believe this right now.
I'm actually physically laughing right now because this is so fucking unbelieveable.
Clarissa just texted me heeeyyyy
I didn't respond for like three hours and she texted me again:
Clarissa: wow ok ignore me
Read 15 minutes ago
Clarissa: r u still salty???
Read 20 minutes ago
Clarissa: come on grant i wanna be friends again
Me: okay.
Clarissa: how r u
Me: great.
Clarissa: i miss u
Me: that's great.
Clarissa: do u miss me
Me: not really.
Clarissa: aw :( why not
Read 10 minutes ago
Clarissa: i don't even know why you're so mad
Me: XD
Clarissa: stop im serious
Read 9 minutes ago
Clarissa: do u wanna go to the mall this weekend
Clarissa: i really miss u
Read 30 minutes ago
I found it so ironic that she was coming back to me just as me and Alina started dating. Obviously she didn't know, but the fact she decided to hit me up again while we were together just made it so much more enjoyable.
But I did not enjoy this whole secret relationship thing. I hated not being able to take her out on the weekends and talk to her like a normal person during school. I hated my friends joking with me about being single, and have girls like Clarissa text me all the time flirting with me and having to come up with some excuse to why I couldn't fuck around with them instead of just flat out saying I had a girlfriend. It drove me fucking insane, but I didn't want to say anything to Alina about it. Obviously telling her parents was going to be difficult, but I couldn't keep going like this, and she thinks everything is fine. Everything wasn't fine, and I couldn't date her if I wasn't allowed to actually date her.
I always had girlfriends who wanted to do PDA, flaunted our relationship way too much, and who would want to hang out every waking moment, I hated those kinds of girls, but never have I had a girlfriend who didn't want to do anything, and that was frustrating too.
All of this just so her parents wouldn't find out. I wish she would just tell them, rip off the bandaid. Even if they completely rejected our relationship, at least we didn't have to lie anymore. We could figure all of that out as it came, for now I just wanted to let people know for fuck's sake.
Whoever you are that I'm writing to, I will never reject you. I will never deny my love for you. If you are one of those PDA people (which I hope you're not), I will protest public kisses, but I will never deny you one. I won't deny you anything that makes you happy, because when you're happy, I'm happy.
And I want the world to see our happiness.
-Grant