We only see each other at Weddings and Funerals
"Vanya! Allison!" Winnie called.
The young girl jogged up to her two sisters. She pulled each one into a big hug and showered them with kisses.
"Allison, I haven't seen you since the red-carpet. What was that- half a year ago?" Winnie asked, but she already knew the answer. She turned to Vanya.
"And Vanya! Hi Baby girl. I haven't see you in a hot second either. Three years I think." Winnie pouted, "You don't call me anymore."
"I didn't think you wanted me-" The shy brunette started.
"We don't." Diego cut in. He stormed between the girls and up the stairs. Winnie sighed.
"Im sorry Vanya." Winnie apologized. "He just hates you because you published a book about his life."
Winnie smiled and gave Vanya a sweet kiss on her cheek. The older woman was stuck to her spot, having been shocked by Winnies words. They weren't surprising- not from Winnie at least- but it was still a hard thing to hear.
"I love you Vanya. You too Allison!" Winnie said and ran up the stairs after Diego.
Winnie looked around for a second, trying to figure out where Diego went. Left or right? Her eyes flittered down either side, and saw movement at the very end of the left hallway.
Dads office.
"Diego is that you?" Winnie called.
She skipped over to the open door and stuck her head in. She didn't find Diego unfortunately, but she did find one of her other brothers.
"Klausy!" Winnie cheered.
The older looking male spun around in his flamboyant glory. His curly black hair askew and his blue eyes, strangely dazed, focused slightly.
"Winnie the Poo! Look at you!" The man beckoned her over. She was quickly swept up into his arms.
"And you! Klausy you look gorgeous." Winnie told him truthfully. Klaus held her face between his hands.
"Ohh you wouldve said that even if I looked like shit." Klaus reminded her truthfully. Winnie rolled her eyes.
"Puh-lease. You know your radiant even if you think you look like shit." Winnie scoffed.
"All the same." Klaus sighed with a flair for the dramatics, "I missed you dreadfully my baby sister."
"One- Im not your Baby sister. Two- we FaceTimed last week." Winnie giggled.
"So you haven't missed me?" Klaus gasped.
"Oh you know I miss you any second I cant see you." Winnie said.
And it was true. Klaus knew this from the bottom of his heart. He didn't know if it was stupidity or what- but Winnie loved him unconditionally. She thought he put the stars in the sky.
It was one of the reasons he was glad she lived in France for the past 5 years. He would've asked for money and she would've given it to him no questions asked. Now that she was back, he was going to have to tread lightly.
"I know I know. Sayy! Hows your art?" Klaus asked. He detached himself from the young girl and started collecting stuff from around Dads office.
"Meh. Jobs here and there." Winnie said.
"And you support yourself with that?" Klaus asked- hitting himself internally the moment he asked. He didn't need to know that. He didn't.
But if she could spare some money..it would be mighty helpful in the long run.
"Rich Men will do anything to get their future told." Winnie replied lamely.
"Anything?" Klaus giggled. He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
"Thats two brothers asking about my bedroom secrets!" Winnie exclaimed, "If I didn't know better- Id say the people in this house are a little too invested in my love life."
Klaus didn't say anything for a moment. She was doing her playful flirting thing again- like shes always done. But this time, she didn't know what she said was the actual the truth.
For about half the Hargreeves children, Winnie was their first crush.
"Well you do still have the body of a teen." Klaus shrugged, implying the obvious problems of screwing a teenage girl.
"I do not!" Winnie huffed. She flicked a strand of pale blonde hair from her eyes and he smiled.
"Mmmhmmm." Klaus hummed knowingly.
"I dont! I just look...young." Winnie said and crossed her arms.
"No. Looking young - for someone born in 1989- would be not having crows feet." Klaus snorted.
"You have the body of a teenager." He pointed up and down at the girl with something he planned on stealing. He immediately stuffed whatever it was into his pocket.
"Ok." Winnie saw his point. "I think I have a prime minister to call."
Klaus and Winnie burst out laughing. Partly because it was totally true and she really did have to make some calls and partly because that fact was so ridiculous- it was funny.
"The prime fucking minister." Klaus laughed. Winnie giggled lightly.
"Well he came to me about the future and whatever. We got to drinking and one thing lead to another." Winnie sighed happily as she remembered the good time.
"Im pretty sure Five predicted this."
-
"As the inaugural class of the umbrella Academy- I purpose we follow a widely accepted school ritual!"
A young Winnie sat in the very corner of a booth in Griddy's donut shop. It was 3 in the morning and her family decided they wanted to gorge themselves on Donuts.
A young Diego sat across from Winnie with Klaus and Ben besides him. Winnie was curled into Fives arms and besides Allison and Luther. Vanya was at the end of the table- like she usually was. In front of them was a feast of donuts.
"And whats that sweetcheeks." Klaus asked. His smile almost as goofy as hers, but only because he smoked a joint before they left and was pleasantly buzzed.
"Im not streaking if thats what you are suggesting." Five quickly cut in. A joking smile on his lips but his worried eyes betrayed him.
"Aw man. There goes my chance to see your cute little butt." Winnie whined.
A ruckus of noise sounded from the other Hargreeves children, who disapproved of Winnies statement. Allison threw her empty cup at her.
"Ok ok. No nudity. Yet." Winnie winked at the blushing Diego across from her.
"Whats your idea Win?" Luther asked- ignoring her flirting ways. Her grin turned wicked.
The young girl leaned forward, letting Fives arm drop from her shoulders to her waist. Albeit her position was still awkward due to her legs slung across his lap- but she needed to get everyones attention.
"Ok so get this." She said, looking into the eyes of every child at the table. She was mildly serious so all of them leaned in slightly in curiosity.
"Superlatives."
"What?" Ben asked in confusion.
"Is that illegal?" Luther asked at the same time. Klaus clapped excitedly.
"Yay! Crimes!" He cheered.
"We are supposed to stop Crimes, Klaus." Allison reminded, clearly amused.
"Maybe its like a test of courage?" Diego asked. He was always ready to prove himself- ever since he got over his stutter.
"Shes talking about the year book thing." Five interrupted. "When you vote 'Most likely' for weird stuff."
"Bingo Daddio." Winnie tapped her nose. She grinned at him with a different type of love.
"I don't get it." Luther stated as he stuffed his face with another donut.
"It sounds fun." Vanya offered, eager to be included.
"Thank you Vanya- and its not hard to get Space Bunny." Winnie giggled and looked back at Five..
She and him were always on the same page.
"Its really easy. So theres a category for uh.. Most likely to lose a Million dollars." Five said off-handed.
"Klaus." Everyone chimed in immediately.
"Hey!" Klaus cried.
They all laughed. It was the type of laugh normal kids-without a care in the world- did. The type only Winnie and Five could bring out. They were the ones that wanted to sneak out tonight in the first place.
"Oh that was fun!" Allison cheered. "I wanna do the next one!"
"Ok shoot." Winnie said. She leaned back into Five and pulled his unoccupied hand into her lap.
"Most likely to... run off and join the circus." She said.
"Ooh thats a good one." Luther complimented.
"Klaus." Diego and Five said together.
"Ben." Klaus volunteered. Ben turned and stared at Klaus like he was an idiot.
"Are you kidding? Diego definitely. He can do those knife throwing shows." Winnie interrupted.
"I agree with Winnie." Vanya said.
"I think Diego too." Luther said and Allison nodded.
"Diego it is." Allison finalized. She had gotten a pen from somewhere and was writing down their personalized Superlatives.
"I object to this." Diego said.
"No objections!" Klaus cut off and slapped his hands onto the table. A ripple of giggles sounded.
"Ok fine. I got one." Diego said. "Most likely to do it with someone in Power."
"Vanya." Winnie said immediately.
"Whats it?" Luther asked- but was ignored. Everyone was too wrapped up in what Winnie said.
"What? Why?" Allison asked in confusion. Winnie shrugged.
"Look at her cheekbones. If anything Id get power and screw her." Winnie waved off- not noticing half the table turn pink.
"I-Id think Allison." Diego mustered. He was trying to ignore the mental image of his hormone soaked mind.
"Klaus. Definitely Klaus. He already lost his virginity." Ben argued. Klaus clocked him in the arm.
"I told you that in confidence!" Klaus cried, scandalized.
"No, you barged into my room and screamed in my face." Ben sighed and rubbed his sore arm.
"Yeah I heard it from down the hall." Allison concurred.
"You all are forgetting the obvious choice." Five interrupted. His confidence quieted everyone at the table.
"Its Winnie."
The young girl with a donut in her mouth, looked up distractedly. She had snatched Allisons pen after her comment about Vanya and was drawing a dick onto a napkin.
It would have been juvenile, but most of her training centered around her artistic abilities- so the product was a disturbingly accurate penis. That was evidence enough for the Hargreeves children.
"Yeah."
"Yeah oh definitely."
"Yup."
"What was the question again?" Winnie asked in confusion. Five smiled and kissed the side of her head lovingly.
"Nothing dear."
-
"Oh my god he totally did." Winnie said in shock.
Her smile softened at the memory- but then she remembered her horrible reality. Five was gone. The boy she loved as deeply as her siblings- just in another way.
"Yeah... hey where do you think dad kept his money?" Klaus asked.
"Hmm?" Winnie asked- not actually meaning it. Her head was somewhere else. "Check under the desk."
"Thank you." Klaus said and bowed. He gave a big wet kiss to the girls head and spun around.
"No problem. Love you Klausy." Winnie said and left the room. Klaus stared after her.
"Love you too Win."