That night in Jonathan's condo was a step forward for both men. Damien got to finally express his deeply latent romantic feelings while Jonathan finally got a taste of freedom from societal pressure. The scene inside the bedroom was filled with bliss and serenity: sunlight streaming through the blinds, grey bedsheets wrapped around two pairs of legs, two pairs of hips, two set of chiseled torsos with equally fit arms leading to two handsome faces.
The leaner one of the two men was tucked comfortably under the more robust man, whose head was resting on top of the blonde man. The two men had a night filled with sweet snuggles, nose rubs, and taking in each other's scents.
The brunette had been awake for some time, he was too enraptured with the blonde to even attempt to move. He looked so peaceful in his sleep that Damien couldn't think to disturb him. He wanted to hold him like this forever. His peaceful staring was disturbed when the blonde began to stir out of his sleep. Damien froze waiting for some sort of negative sign from Jonathan, it was a large leap from admitting to having romantic feelings to cuddling.
Instead of the panic-stricken face he was expecting, he was greeted with twinkling blue eyes and a blinding smile. Damien felt the tension ease out his body, he just hugged Jonathan a little tighter letting the man know that he was happy to be holding him.
"Morning. Did you sleep well?"
"Morning. And to be honest, that was probably the best night of sleep I ever had."
The blonde proceeded to turn a nice shade of red after admitting how good it felt to be held at night. It would take him some time to get use to saying what he feels. He was taught to keep emotions hidden but after these last few months, he couldn't take it anymore. He didn't want to suppress himself anymore, he had more than enough money to be off on his own. So, why not start with this? If anyone from his family had a problem, he could just leave and start anew.
"Well, I for one am glad to hear that."
Damien chuckled. He was doing a great job tampering down his possessiveness. He didn't want to go too fast. But he didn't want to leave this bed, he wanted to stay the way they were; cuddled together with no care for the outside world.
"I should get going for work. Don't forget, if you feel overwhelmed with something or just lonely...you can call me. No more running away, because this time I will chase you."
Damien said the last part with a little growl and didn't miss the way Jonathan's face flushed at his slight show of aggressiveness.
"Okay."
"I'm serious Jonathan. I don't want you hiding from me. I won't pressure you for a relationship, but I will fight for you."
With that being said, Damien got out the bed and put on his discarded clothes. The whole time he was getting dressed he felt eyes following his body. He couldn't help but crack a smile knowing that Jonathan appreciated his body. Before leaving the bedroom, he walked over and dropped a tender kiss to the blonde forehead's and made his exit from the condo.
The whole drive home, the brunette was feeling happier than he had felt in a while. It felt like he was in a daze while getting ready for work, totally focused on the night he shared with Jonathan.
He actually has feelings for me. Me! Out of even more qualified men in this city...he chose me. That's just weird, there must be an agenda. Right?
Before the thoughts could careen into negativity, his phone started ringing. It was odd because no one really called him this early except his assistant when they had a major project in the works. But the designs were done and already sent to Henri, so everything should be fine. So, who's calling?
"Hello?"
"Hey."
Damien froze, the low almost shy voice coming through the phone made him feel giddy. It was like he was a teenager with his first love. The man had to get his heart to calm down before he replied to the sweet voice.
"Are you okay?
"Yeah. I just..."
Damien waited patiently for Jonathan to finish what he was saying. He knew that being open with emotion was a sore spot for him sometimes so, the brunette liked waiting to see what he would say. It was quite amusing to think of the man as being at a loss for words.
"I miss you."
This man finds new ways of surprising me every day. I can't believe he actually said something like that.
Before he could continue thinking of how cute the man was, the younger male continued on with a speech that reeked of nervousness.
"I know that we just saw each other. It's okay if you don't miss me, I just wanted you to know. It's going to take me some time getting used to having conversations like this with you, but I couldn't stop myself from calling you."
"It's fine. You don't know how much I missed you while you were gone Jonathan."
Damien's voice had taken on a low timbre of its own. He wished he could show the man just how much he had missed him but that would be too much for the newly liberated Jonathan. He didn't want to push the man in a corner, nothing good would come of that.
"I'm sorry. I really should have called but I didn't want to burden you with my problems anymore. You are my friend Damien, not my psychiatrist."
"For you, I wouldn't have minded being both."
"You are too selfless, you have to hold me accountable for the past decade. I was a horrible friend to you, more times than none. I don't want to be that guy anymore."
"Then, who do you want to be?"
"The only person that you rely on."
For the second time that morning Damien was frozen. The man had uttered that sentence with so much conviction and honesty that he wouldn't dare question him about the validity of it. It warmed his heart that he cared so much for him.
"Well, I think we can work up to that. If you don't mind sticking around for some time."
The resounding laugh that he received as a reply was music to his ears. He always loved making Jonathan smile and laugh, that probably wouldn't change anytime soon.
"You aren't going to let me forget about my Houdini act, huh?"
"Nope. Not anytime soon, so you might want to suck it up for the time being."
"Fine. I guess I deserve the ridicule."
Damien couldn't keep the smile out his voice when he replied, "Yeah, you do."
Meanwhile, in his office across town; James Meyers sat in his office contemplating his own life and relationships. He felt like he had failed his eldest son, he realized that he never truly had any freedom. He had basically railroaded his life to be an exact copy of his own. A young business man with a promising future and a beautiful woman on his own.
Now reminiscing, he could see that Jonathan was never truly happy with Ashley. His smile was dead, his eyes were dull, and spent more days at work than he did at home. How could he have been so blind?! His own son had been deteriorating in front of his eyes and he refused to acknowledge it.
And Jackson was complete opposite. He hid his pain in the playboy stereotype but truthfully, he just wanted attention from his father and brother. The younger male didn't feel included in his own family.
"Now, I have to think of the possibility that one may not be my son."
James was heartbroken and angry. He figured that Maya knew why he hadn't been home for some time now. He never knew Harold to be one to hold secrets. You could figure anything he knew after two cups of brandy. The man was a lightweight with loose lips and apparently loose pants as well...
The situation had taken a toll on him, between the fall out with Jonathan and infidelity of his wife. The man was emotionally exhausted, and it was starting to show. Although he hadn't spoken much to his sons in the past weeks, he knew he wasn't the smiling man that he once was. Now, he was just numb.
Still hashing through his thoughts and emotions while looking at downtown Chicago, he heard his office door open from behind him...
"Jessica, you have to buzz me before letting people... Oh, how are you doing?"
Jonathan stood in the open doorway as stoic as ever. Not letting any emotion show on his face. He wasn't sure how this sitting could go with his father, so he had to mentally prepare himself.
"Hey dad, how have you been?"
Jonathan noticed how the older man's face lit up when he called him dad. He looked exhausted and weathered down, and Jonathan couldn't help but feel guilty for that. His disappearing act had hurt more than just Damien.
"I'm fine. Are you doing better now?"
James knew about the engagement party blowout. It couldn't be avoided, face of the guests as well as the face of his youngest son told him all he needed to know.
"Yeah, looks like you have seen better days though. What's going on?"
That was more like his son, straight to point. There was no bullshitting when Jonathan knew something was up. So, with a sigh of weariness and trepidation; he just let it out.
"Your mother had an affair with your uncle."
There was utter silence in that office. Luckily, Jonathan had the thought to close the office door behind him when he entered. Even with the overwhelming silence and space between the two men, Jonathan made a scoff of disbelief.
"There's no way she did that."
James smiled sadly, boys always want to protect mama. No matter what damage she does, the same can be said about some mothers. He knew that this information can further divide his family, but Jonathan was the one who wanted to know. Be careful what you ask for.
"Unfortunately, these letters prove differently. I don't know how long the affair went on, they didn't have any dates written on them."
James reached the lowest drawer on his right and pulled out a bundle of papers. They were dainty and smelled of a fragrance that longed disappeared. Each individual paper had a tiny sky-blue bow in the top center of it. The papers themselves didn't have a uniformed look, some looked old and worn and some looked newer.
"Those are his responses to your mother. It ranges from places to meet to what is going on in their lives. Almost seems like they were the ones who were meant to be soulmates."
Jonathan was frozen, he didn't want to read the letters but at the same time his curiosity was itching away at his brain. What were the odds that he and his father would have to go through the same pain of betrayal and agony? What was wrong with their family?!
The younger Meyers strolled across the office to the man in the chair and did something that shocked them both: gave him a hug. To many people this simple action doesn't mean much but to James Meyers, it was almost like a rare phenomenon. When Jonathan had been younger, he was as lovely as any other child deemed normal by society. But as he got older, the hugs from father to son were less and less. His mother had to force him to have physical contact with her as well.
"No offense, but what are you doing?"
"I know what if feels like. And the one thing I wanted most: was a hug from my family telling me it was okay. I didn't want my family to make it seem like I was overreacting, I just wanted to be heard and understood."
The older man broke down for many reasons. He let his son down by his lack of reaction, he was alone away from his home, he was angry at his brother for doing what he did and now he just broke.
Jonathan just kept hugging his father through it all because he knew how it felt. He knew that his father was hurting and needed the support.
"I'm sorry son. You needed support and I failed you. I should have done more for you."
"It's fine, you were in a tough spot. I'm not holding it against you."
The old Jonathan would have held a grudge, but he was changing his ways. He didn't like having to check his emotions at every turn. It felt good to just do what his instincts were telling him to do. He truly did understand what his father was going through though, it had to be tough having to choose between your children. Even if one did emotionally harm the other.
"That doesn't excuse it. Although I did have words with Jackson, I didn't make a stand with you. I'm sorry."
"Okay, dad. You look tired, how about you go nap on the couch over there for a while. I won't go anywhere, Jackson's at work yeah? He should be able to handle things here."
In that second, James was taken back to Jonathan's childhood. It always seemed that Jonathan could sense the longing and sadness in his father. He didn't know what his father was longing for or what his sadness alluded to, but he wanted to be the one to make his dad feel better.
James just smiled and nodded while making his way towards the sofa in his office. After taking off his suit jacket and shoes, he noticed Jonathan bringing him a blanket and pillow. He felt like he was the child and Jonathan were the parent.
"Thanks son but you don't have to take care of me. That's my job to do for you, even though I have already failed. I want to be a better parent to you, even if it's the last thing I do in my old age."
"Dad, you aren't old. And you aren't a horrible parent. You are doing your best and we all make mistakes. Stop being so hard on yourself."
"This new Jonathan is positive and forthcoming. I like it, you look happier. And that's all I ever wanted for you."
"Yeah, it took a long time but I'm happy. And you will be too dad, you just gotta find what it is you are looking for."
"Huh? What do you mean?"
Jonathan heaved a deep sigh, he never knew how to explain things to his father. He was used to being told that he was too young to understand matters.
"For a long time, I could sense this longing in you. It's almost as if something was missing from your life. You don't have to tell me if I'm right or not, I just want you to know that it will only get better if you go after it. I don't want you to spend the rest of your life trying to cover up your sadness."
"You were always way too smart and observant for your own good."
James had a smile on his face which counteracted his statement, he was proud of Jonathan. His kid was wiser beyond his years and he could leave this happy knowing that. Jackson on the other hand...still needed some work.
"Don't worry son, your old man will be fine. I just want to fix our relationship now, that's all I'm focused on."
"That would make very happy dad."
"And that's all I want."
James' last statement was slightly slurred while he was falling asleep but the smile on his face didn't disappear. He really was glad that his son had made it through the fire.
Jonathan sat in the chair beside the sofa and just looked on. He was starting to feel a peace that he hadn't felt before, a sense of true purpose and not because of his family name. It felt great, almost euphoric to be this free.
He wanted to tell his father everything that had gone on during his sabbatical from elite society. Of how he broke himself down and now he is starting to rebuild himself. The conversation he was prepared to have with his father took a turn once he saw how haggard his father looked. He always knew James
Meyers to be a man of refinery and poise. There was never a hair out of place or foot out of step when the man made his entrance.
To see him reduced to a shell of his former self, just didn't feel right. It was a weird thing to have to see. But his need for talking about his new outlook on life could wait. It was his turn to be there for James, and he wanted his daddy to be happy.