“Part of recovery is relapse.” – Steven Adler.
•••
The sole occupant of the house that greeted him as he stepped into the front porch was pristine silence. That was the routine everyday: He returning back to his fortress of solitude in dampened spirits, in the hopes that without effecting any change on his work-oriented life, the setting in place could be altered to a less lonely one. Truth be told, he would spend less time at work if his house had a little more warmth in it―even if it was the tiniest bit of warmth.
Tari had gone above and beyond in making the house more than inhabitable with intricate and explicit design. It was a five bedroom duplex that had rooms with consistent designs of walls adorned with granulated pebbles, curtains pleated in satin freckled sequins and carpets embroidered with floral patterns. Glass panels were also dominant in the house, giving it a modern loft appeal. Yet, all of these weren’t enough to placate his state of mind.
It wasn’t his fault though.
As a result of the harsh constraints of his background, he had been forced to prioritize career pursuits over every other thing in life. More than friends, human company, and love. And now he was paying the price for it. He was in his late twenties, yet he couldn’t lay claim to anyone that would refer to him as a loved one, when outlining the names of the people that were dearest to their hearts. Even his own family would only refer to him on the grounds of sentiments and obligation, and not really because he was viewed as true family.
He wondered if it was too late.
Was it too late to change lanes, re-orientate his race and give himself a new destination? Was it too late to pick up the phone and call the numerous set of friends that he had simply neglected since concluding his journey in school? Was it too late to plead for a second chance, and a shot at redemption? Was it too late to recover his lost treasure? Back then as a result of the school’s setting, he had had the most valuable and paramount thing in life without taking cognizance of it. He was fooled into believing it was something else, and now he was paying the price.
Why relapse now, though?
In the past, many lonely, haunting days like the current one had been prevalent. Yet, they had never dazed him so much to the point, that he felt like he was drowning in quicksand. In fact, he had gotten so accustomed to the solitary nature of his life―and accepted that a life defined by love was probably not one for everybody. But, the reason why it stung him so hard today was as clear as day.
Lani.
Interacting with her in the duration of two days made him realize, that his feelings for her never vanished but only went dormant as a result of her absence in his life. Now that she was back in his life, he couldn’t help but crave for more of her presence in it. The more he pondered on it, the more he realized, that he probably wasn’t in want of the company of any other person. Just hers.
Now slumped on the center couch of his wide, spacious living room, he pulled out his grey, Samsung S9 and navigated to his call log. Lani had been the one person he had contacted all through the week, and pretty much in the space of one month. How pathetic to be this sorry for himself. It wasn’t his style, as he always prided himself on the fact that he mastered the rudiments of living his current life.
His gaze remained rooted to her name on the screen, and he didn’t know when he tapped the phone panel to place a call to her line. He didn’t know what he was doing really, but he figured he wasn’t going to do much thinking and just go through with it. It was when the ringing ceased, and a voice came up on the other end that he realized the gravity of his action.
“Hello?”
He didn’t respond, yet.
“Hello?” There was more emphasis and stress, on the second syllable of the word. “Tari, is that you?”
His heartbeat quickened at the pronouncement of his name on her lips. There was a certain detail she put in spelling out the vowels, in a very sensual way that always heightened his senses.
“I see you saved my number.” He smirked, grateful that the android hadn’t yet an inbuilt facility to enable minds be read during phone calls via electromagnetic waves and scientific enchantments. Otherwise, Lani would’ve stole a hint on his pathetic situation and felt just as sorry for himself as he was. Then again, would her empathy really be a bad thing? Wasn’t that what he wanted?
There was a pause, before her next reply and he was terrified for a moment that she was going to hang up.
“I didn’t actually save it. I can just recall it had a lot of zeros in it.” She didn’t sound as hostile as he’d have predicted due to the nature of the sudden call, like she was on Tuesday. “So, what’s your reason for calling this time? Is there any other thing you need to confirm that you can’t wait for until next week?”
“No, not really.” He drawled. Okay, this was it. What angle was he going to go with to construct a believable lie? “I just—I hope I’m not disturbing you?”
“Really? You’re asking me that when you’re calling me in the evening of a Friday? And you think I would be idle and wouldn’t actually be doing something else? Well, since you asked―I’m simply watching TV, nothing more. You?”
“Just sitting down,” There was a certain calm that was in place that he so much enjoyed, unlike their previous interactions characterized by heavy, disorienting remarks. “What happened to your much acclaimed social life? Aren’t you supposed to be doing something more fun than watching TV on Friday evenings?”
“Guy, those days are gone.” He could detect a reminisce smile on her face. “Plus, I’m at home not at school. I might have exaggerated the details of my social life before. It isn’t all that great, if I’m not in a bubbly atmosphere. Not that the neighborhood I stay in isn’t lively and all, but well, it’s not like when you’re in school and you’re surrounded with so much energy. Plus, work leaves me too drained to take my social life seriously anyway. So these days, I’m indoors for most of the time. I’m not even going to bother to ask about your social life, because you didn’t even have one back then. So I’m just going to go on to ask how you survive?”
She was being quite unrelenting in a way that he found unsettling. Her demeanor to him had being mostly cold, but tonight she was being all warm and pleasant. Whatever the reason was, he figured he didn’t care much for it. He could only live in the moment, and enjoy it for as long as it’d last.
“I really don’t know, to be honest.” He replied. “I just live each day as it comes, and not worry about tomorrow until it becomes the present day. And like you also, work leaves me pretty much exhausted―”
“Nah, don’t try to steal my lines. It doesn’t apply to you. Workaholics like you are actually the ones who leave work exhausted.” She said wittily, making him laugh. “So how’s the building construction coming? Making any progress?”
“Progress? What do you think it is, building a castle with sand at the beach?” He laughed. “It takes a really long amount of time, and you were there just Tuesday. Although, in the next few weeks, we should be moving on to the next phase of work.”
“My bad then. So what do you do all day? You just go there and supervise and give directions right?”
“I wish.” Tari groaned. “You think if that was all I did―I’d be this exhausted? I take part in the manual work also, with the builders and engineers. It’s not compulsory though, as some architects don’t like getting their hands dirty but not me. It’s always been one of the things I loved most about it from the start. Plus, I love being engaged with every detail and the people under you are more motivated to work when they see you giving a good example.”
“Wow,” Tari envisioned an awed expression on her face as she spoke: Chin locked in her tender palms, with her elbows resting on her delicately attractive thighs, eyes widened and lips pursed. How he would give anything to bring his imagination to life, right in his apartment. Alone. He shook off his thoughts, struggling to pay attention to her words. “That must be a lot of work. Because right now, I’m imagining myself doing more than the initial lay out and mock up of designs I do for buildings, and then partaking in the installation of the furniture and all. Hammering shelves into walls, laying carpets on the ground, fixing wallpapers, painting doors? Phew! Definitely what I can’t handle. And please do not go into a speech of how I’m always underestimating my talent. This one has nothing to do with talent. You’d be the one overestimating my strength if you think I can do that.”
“I wasn’t about to say that,” He laughed. “So, how was your day at work? If I’m entitled to ask. I’ve always been curious to know how things are at an interior décor firm. What’s it like?”
“Well,” She paused to organize an analysis as it would seem. “It’s nothing unlike the normal work experience and setting, I guess. There is the C.E.O. at the very top, the founder herself who takes care of the administrative duties alongside the administrative department. They are in a different building, that is the east wing.”
“An east wing?”
“Yup, the firm has three wings. Main wing which is in the center, and where the designers’ office is located with the C.E.O. also. Then the east wing for the admin department, and the west wing is mostly not segregated for anything. It’s mostly a space of big conference rooms where different teams can convene and all that.”
“Wow, sounds like a very big establishment.”
“Oh it is. The owner is married to a billionaire, so yeah she can afford to start with a bang. But she is really good though, and wouldn’t have gotten to the stage she is in today, if she wasn’t diligent and hardworking. There is only so much big capital could give you.”
“Go on, I’m really loving the structure of the building.”
“Oh, I almost forget you’re an architect. Just don’t steal our concept, or else I’d have no choice than to slice your throat when next we meet.”
“Got it.” He chuckled.
“So in the main wing, where my own business is, we have a hierarchy in place. The executives, which are the team leaders. The deputies of the executives, like myself. We’re about ten in number and we have five office adjudicated to us.”
“That is two deputies occupy one room.”
“Exactly. Somehow, I never get good people to stay in the same office with me. When I got promoted at first, my neighbor was this guy that had slept with almost every woman willing in the office. You know your average, self pompous playboy who has never gotten a ‘no’ in his life and thinks that everyone has a price and all that nonsense.”
His lips twitched in amusement. “Okay?”
“Yeah, so you can imagine contending with that everyday. He was bothering me so much, but I decided to live with it anyway until one day. He dared to touch me.”
“Touched you?”
“Yeah, what part of the statement don’t you understand?” She sounded genuinely confused.
“Never mind, go on. How did he touch you? Or more appropriately, where did he touch you—oh chill wait, is that a proper question? Just, go on and answer the question in the way you’d have answered it the first time if I hadn’t interrupted you earlier―”
“It’s okay, Tari.” Her laughter echoed on the other end. “We’re matured adults, okay? He touched me on my butt.”
“Oh,” His eyes widened.
“Yeah, and it was no small touch. He squeezed it really hard. I was so pissed, and I gave him a very dirty slap in response, which is so unlike me. I’m never ever violent. But, groping a lady’s ass? That’s the peak. Do you know how the pig responded? Just guess.”
“I have no idea, this guy is an animal.”
“He laughed. He fucking laughed. He thought I was playing a game with him and that I was enjoying it. He was going to touch me again, and I was going to slap him again but then I remembered something about not getting violent with men that are too forward. It could end really badly. God knows what he could do to me if he was angry. It was late in the evening, and well most of the employees of lower rank had left the office.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, so I pushed him really hard and stepped out of the office. I complained to the C.E.O. but she pleaded with me not to be too angry, because well, apparently the guy is a relative to her and as a family member he is her responsibility. I was disappointed because I thought she’d empathize with me more as a fellow woman. For Christ sake, I was sexually harassed. What was the benefit of having a female boss when she didn’t seem to understand these things?”
“I don’t think I like her very much after this conversation either.”
“Well, she begged me to accommodate his excesses because she can’t possibly kick him out and I told her that there was no way in hell that I was going to return back to that office, and she got me transferred to another office where I entered another wahala. It was another man that was there, a much older, married man in fact.”
“And he made an advance on you too?” He asked, infuriated. What was it with men and their sense of entitlement over women bodies these days? It was totally getting out of hand.
“No, God no, he didn’t.” She laughed. “He is a decent man, I think…But, I must say, he is quite eccentric and lousy.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. He brings food into the office, despite the strict rules that forbid us not to do so. He eats and then ends up littering the entire place up with food, because I really don’t know if there is a big hole in his mouth, and all the food he is eating is leaking out or something. Afterwards, the stench from the food will dominate and pollute the air―and the mere sight of it alone on the floor is disgusting. But, he is a much older person, and there is only so much I can say to correct him before it’d be termed disrespectful.”
“I understand.”
“And the worst thing is that he is extremely nice. He is a very jovial, cordial person. So even if you want to get angry at him, you just can’t. On my birthday last year, he took me and the rest of the team out for food and drinks in the KFC outlet opposite the building and he paid for every single darn thing we bought that day. So yeah, he has a very fatherly, caring personality. So please tell me how you’re supposed to get angry at him when he starts?
“And did I mention that he makes a lot of phone calls, like nigga the people that you call―don’t they have jobs or something? Do they stay at home all day and simply wait for you to call them? Because that’s really what it feels like. And when he is calling, he’d push his belly out, recline on the chair and set his two legs on the table. The man is a case, seriously. I just figured that all in all, it’s still a lot better than being in the same room with someone that I’d have to be alert with all the time, making me unable to concentrate on my work.”
“Way better.”
“Yup, and so well that’s what everyday life at the office is like. Then we have the stylists who are the people at the lowest level of the hierarchy. In every team, there are three stylists, one deputy and an executive to make up a team of five. So the number of people on one project never exceeds that.”
“But you mentioned that your executive was out on a leave,” He said. “So who is going to assume her role now?”
“Didn’t I mention earlier that I’m being promoted on probation? If I pull off something really impressive that blows Dayo and Tiolu’s minds away, then yeah – I’d be moved into a permanent executive position.”
“Oh, sorry.” Tari mumbled. “I just thought maybe they’d pair you up with another executive or something.”
“Nah, they don’t do that.” He could sense her shaking her head. “Even if they aren’t occupied currently―it’s not done. The C.E.O. believes in the compactness of a team. And so disentangling teams just to make sure the number is constant could prove disastrous. She believes a compact team of three people would do way better than a disorganized team of ten people. So if a contract is awarded to a team, and at the moment it’s only two people on ground, then it’d be only those two people that would work on it.”
“That makes sense.”
“It does, fortunately it doesn’t get to the point that the workload is too cumbersome for the team. So that’s enough about me. How about you?”
He sat up and heaved a sigh, haphazardly running his free hand through his hair. “There is nothing much to say about me really. I go to the office on office days, and go to the site when I’m supposed to. My office is on one of the highest floors and because of that, I don’t get to interact with a lot of people even if I wanted to―”
“Which you don’t want to in the first place, so it’s perfect for you. I have to admit that your office is really breathtaking. When I entered and saw you at the other end, I almost asked if you were truly the owner of the office. It says a lot about your position, you know. It’s very high up there. I’m quite envious. I’ve always wanted an office to myself.”
“Do executives get lone offices?”
“Of course, they do. So hopefully, by this time next year―I’d be telling a very, different story.”
“You will be telling a different story. That is sure because you’re going to hit this project out of the park.” He assured her.
“Thanks for the motivation, I appreciate it. But you know you still haven’t answered my question right?”
“There is nothing more to say about the office―”
“No, not the office. The very first question I asked you when this phone call started.”
Uh-oh. So she hadn’t let that go.
“Why I called?”
“Bingo!” She exclaimed. “So please, could you go on to enlighten me?”
“Is it compulsory?” He asked in dismay, and that drew a laughter from her.
“I’m curious, Tari. That’s all. Did you call simply to talk?”
“Is that a bad thing?” He bit his lower lip.
“For Christ sake, answer the question first. Why did you call?”
And just for once, he decided to be reckless and be brutally honest.
“I missed you.” He waited patiently for a reply, and when no one came he went on. “I missed you and since I couldn’t see your face, I had no other choice than to call. So yeah, that’s the reason I called.”
He had never felt more vulnerable in his entire life. He felt like a mold of cheese, thrown into an alley of hungry, wild mice at the mercy of their hunger and thirst. One wrong move, and he’d be gobbled up instantly.
“You’re drunk, aren’t you?” She replied, finally. “I kind-off suspected that. You don’t sound as energetic as usual.”
Just when he had given up all hopes on coming up with a good lie, she had to go and do that for him. Oh, how much he loved her.
Love?
Did he love her? Was that the reason why he felt like he was swimming in a pool of fire, anytime they were apart? Or why he felt nervous and giddy when she was around? Or why the mere mention of his name on her lips could disperse warmth of the greatest kind in his chest? And why he so much fervently clamored for her forgiveness?
It couldn’t be. It was only a figure of speech.
“Tari, you’re drunk right?” She was laughing. “Boy, you’re such a big baby. How much did you drink. Be honest.”
“I’m not drunk,” He protested. A drunk man wouldn’t agree they were drunk, so he went ahead to argue. She wanted to believe that was the reason he called her? Let it be so. He wasn’t telling lies―technically, he was actually telling the truth. “Seriously, I swear to God. I’m not drunk.”
“And I believe you.” Her cackle grew louder. “Thank God it was me you called, and not one of your hot colleagues at work who would begin to wonder why you called her when you hardly interact at work. And then come the next day, she’d start to give you those come hither eyes and you’d be totally dumbfounded―not knowing what you did the previous night.”
“Yeah, yeah,” He grumbled.
“I’m willing to bet that I’m pretty much the closest female to your heart, right now.” She taunted him further with a giggle. “Despite the fact that we’ve talked twice in the entire week. When are you going to take your relationship life serious, Tari?”
“When you take yours, seriously. Are you really going to tell me that you currently have a man that is very close to your heart or a male friend?”
“No, but that’s because I’m a woman. We’re not the ones out there on the field, seeking. We’re the ones bidding our time, waiting. So, don’t be comparing yourself with me.”
“You’re really telling yourself that? When a lot of your mates are out there shooting their shots, irrespective of the fact that they’re women? You’re going to keep on waiting for the man, aren’t you?”
“See guy, I’m not that bold. I don’t see anything wrong in that, but when I don’t have the mind what should I now do? Plus, if someone does approach me, and I feel something―I’m not the type that will start fronting. That’s not needed. I’d do my best to make the interactions balanced and all, so he won’t be the one doing all the shooting, as in shots o. But he has to make the first step, I guess. It’s not that hard, because I’m good at giving green lights. You’d easily know when I like you, and when I want you to make an advance.”
“I see.”
“What are you seeing? This is a phone call. Anyhoo, but you understand right? In the past, you didn’t go through the hassle of placing where my head was at? You easily knew that I liked you.”
“Yeah, I did.” He nodded. It would seem that she wasn’t that bothered about making references to the past like she was before. “But you are still quite bold for a girl, though.”
“A girl?”
“Then, you were bold for a girl. Now?…You’re a lot more closed off.” He blurted, before he could understand the meaning of his statement. Of course, he was laying out his distaste for her cold attitude towards him, in the hopes that it could maybe change. Classic grumbling action, and that wasn’t his style. But he couldn’t exactly retract his words. “I don’t know, maybe it’s just my observation.”
“Nah, I’m not more closed off but I get why you’d say that though. Before, that is back then in school. I was only so forward with you because well, I had feelings for you. But right now, it’s not like that. I’m more clear headed with things now, and even if I had feelings for you now, nothing would still change.”
“Okay then.”
“Yeah, but I still try to be cordial as always. I’m just being very cautious, that’s all. So, Mr. Tari Ibiyemi, I have one more question for you before I hang up. There is a TV reality show coming up in a couple of minutes and I can’t afford to miss it for anything in the world.”
“Glad to hear that my company isn’t valued,” He said in an overzealous, disconsolate voice that humored her. But the truth was that he was greatly wounded by her words. His company was going to be discarded without second thoughts for something else she had at her disposal, all day long.”
“Why did you call me? I know you’re not thinking quite clearly, cos you’re drunk. But you’re not that drunk, since you’ve been talking like a normal person all night. So you’re just a little tipsy and all. Why me? Surely, there are other people you could have called.”
“Other women, you mean.” His nose scrunched.
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“Would you believe if I told you, that your earlier joke of you being the closest woman to my heart, was true?”
“For real?” She sounded genuinely surprised. “Are you kidding me? I was only joking!”
He sighed. “Well, it’s true. I literally don’t have any woman on my contact list, who would deem my call at this time of the night appropriate. Even if they might be willing to talk, it’d be just too strange. You were the first person that popped into mind.”
Actually, you’re the only person that popped into mind.
“I see, but I still find that a bit hard to swallow. It’s a hard pill to swallow. I’d have trusted that women would be the ones to make advance on you, since you’re so busy making advances with work.”
“Advances on men aren’t all that common. You say it with an assurance that’s so solid. I’m not even all that, pertaining to looks and other departments. So why should you be so sure?”
“It’s not necessarily about having looks that are pitch perfect. It’s about having a character that seems pitch perfect. Surely, the women who will check you out are women of our age range and if you don’t know, we are old o. As in women of my age that are not married. You might still be young for a man, but for an unmarried woman, I’m quite old as I’d be turning twenty-six soon.”
“Okay, can’t see your point though.”
“The point is that, women like me aren’t looking for flings or short term relationships. They are looking for a keeper, and you my friend, might not necessarily look like one, but you sure act like one. All your colleagues at work know that you’re all about business, and you don’t do all that flirting nonsense. You might not be too handsome, but you have your height going for you and you earn a really large salary that women of high taste might want to deceive themselves into saying it’s not important, but that is attractive. A young, successful man.”
“Okay so what’s the deal here? After giving me all these compliments, you’re definitely going to ask me to do this same for you right? Because there is definitely no way in hell that all what you’ve said since is for free.”
“I’m being serious, quit cutting me off. Bottom line is that women that are your mates are very eager to settle down and once they see one tall, cute guy that doesn’t seem like a playboy and is also very hardworking and successful? It blows their minds away and makes them do things they wouldn’t do on a normal day―for example, make an advance on him. And when I say advance, I don’t mean seduction or something even dirty. Nope, it could be a simple green light. Although it would be a very bright one that everyone else would be able to see also or simply just seeking out your company and all.”
“Well, I never saw it that way.”
“Or maybe, you’ve changed over the past few years. Who knows? Maybe you come into the office with one woman, and leave with a different one?”
“The office? When it’s not club―that I don’t even have any reason to go to in the first place.”
“I knew it. You promised me sometime ago, that you’d find time to go there but I didn’t buy it. You said you’d visit sometime, and I remember replying with I’m sure that means never, ever. You’re as predictable as the days of the week, Tari. The way everyone knows that tomorrow is Saturday, is the same way everyone knows your action would always follow the same trend it has been, since the day you came into this world.”
“Which is?”
“Work, work, work,” She hummed in Rihanna’s voice, as her voice adjusted to the melody of the song. He couldn’t help but laugh. “I just pray you meet someone one day that pulls you out of all of that. Don’t get married to someone like yourself. Your children would suffer and pay for it.”
“Not possible, since people like myself bore me anyway.” He said.
“People like you bore the average person, so you can see how much effort I’m putting in here? Try and work with me. Anyhoo, I have to go now. Don’t worry, when we see on Monday, I won’t mention this phone call―unless you remember, that is. No need to make you feel uncomfortable and begin to wonder if you professed your undying love for me over the phone.”
“Yeah, sure.” He scowled. “Goodnight, Lani.”
“Goodnight, Tari.” And instantly, the beep sounded and the call came to an ended. That went a lot better than he’d like to admit. It was the first real conversation they had in a long time, and it was void of all negative vibe. She wasn’t cold, and he wasn’t walking around eggshells so as not to set off her anger. But, he couldn’t fight off the feeling that the chain of events manifesting had too many similarities with what went down in the past.
And judging by the way they had ended, he knew he had to be exercise immense caution in the next few days in matters pertaining to their relationship.
*****
“Jesus Christ, that Ronaldo guy is just a terror. See the way Baba curved the ball from the distance…”
Tari grunted, massaging his forehead with both palms as he forced himself to concentrate on the notebooks before him on the desk. It was Sunday and after observing his afternoon siesta, he decided to take some time to revise the details he had jotted down concerning the departmental collaboration project. During the week, he was pretty much occupied with his own course demands but the ruckus being constituted by his roommates, who had just returned from watching a premier league game of Manchester United and Chelsea was impeding progress.
He could hardly concentrate.
“You guys, could you please reduce your volumes?” He called over his shoulder, to the center of the room, where the boys gathered round in a circle. “Some of us are actually trying to do other things with life.”
None out of the trio reacted in a way that seemed someone had just made a request of them. They continued bickering in loud volumes, and he figured, that if he wanted to get any work done, he’d pretty much have to do it with the unpleasant atmosphere in place. Returning his focus back to his notepad, he leaned forward and peered deeper into the words―as though he could teleport into the two-dimensional world of words, and escape the noise. Before he could make inroads, the loud chiming of a ringing from the edge of his desk drew his attention.
He confirmed the identity to be Lani’s, before flipping the phone open and raising it to his right ear.
“Hello, Lani.”
“Hey, Tari.” Her voice was booming with energy. “What’s good?”
He reclined in his chair. “I’m good, just a little bit busy with studying. You?”
“Oh, well if studying your ceiling, because you’re really bored counts as studying, then why not? I guess I’m studying also.”
He chuckled. “What happened to your very vibrant social life?”
“It’s still very vibrant, mister.” She protested. “Today is just Sunday―my most dull day. Everyone is just like, super tired after church and want to sleep. Not me, I don’t feel like sleeping. I feel like living, doing something. But unfortunately no one feels this way with me, so I’m just forced into being solemn also. What about you? What do you do when everyone around you is calm?”
“Oh, everyone around me is everything but calm.” He corrected her statement. “The boys just returned from a match, and they’re rambling about how one team beat the other. It’s a nightmare because I’m trying to concentrate here but anytime I’m done reading a paragraph, what I’m hearing in my head is Ronaldo this, and Rooney that and Tevez urgh!” Tari smacked his forehead almost too violently. “Kill me already!”
“I take it that you’re not a football fan, then?”
“I don’t hate it either. I’m not just moved or concerned about it. It just takes so much energy and devotion. Have you seen how boys could be downtrodden and sad when their favorite teams lose? Or how the best of friends could argue and fight, simply because they support different sides and all that. Some of them go to the most stupid lengths just to watch a match. I’ve heard of people who skip class because of it. Can you imagine? Your parents are out there, hustling and dropping down money for your education at great expense but you’re here watching football match when you should be at class?”
She laughed. “Yeah, sure it’s that bad but at the same time, doing that once or twice, doesn’t automatically make you not smart. For example, someone who reads a lot like you can afford to skip a couple of classes to watch football and at the end of the day you’d still come out on top because you’re just that smart.”
“What’s your point?”
“My point is, just because someone is watching football when he or she is supposed to be in class doesn’t automatically make them a failure. While the action might be stupid, it doesn’t guarantee anything really. What about the people that go to class and gist all through, and eventually don’t gain a single thing? Might as well just save yourself the stress and stay in the hostel, you know, chill. Whatever is worth doing is worth doing well. So, if you want to waste your time, kuku waste it well.”
“Well, you have a point.” He caved in. “All what I’m just trying to say is that football demands energy that I don’t have in my life. School has taken up my entire energy already. There is none to dispense to other demanding stuff like it. That’s it. What about you? Do you like football?”
“Not really, but I’m a girl so that’s quite normal. I only watch and support when it’s a big competition like when Nigeria is playing or something. The last world cup, which was two years ago I think―”
“Yup, last two years. Two thousand and six.”
“And well you know I have a dad, and an elder brother. They got all hyped about it and bought jerseys and everything. We watched every single match sha. That’s the only time I get hyped about it and now that I recall, it requires a lot of energy. Because when the teams that we support start to lose? Oh well, it could ruin someone’s mood for like the entire day.”
“So you see? I’d rather stay out of it.” He replied. “So, what’s up though? Why the sudden call out of the blues? Anything urgent come up?”
“No, actually. I just―is it wrong to call you?” Uncertainty began to seep into her voice.
“I just wanted to clarify if there was an emergency, that’s all.” He laughed. “And I can sense there is none.”
“Nope, not at all. I simply called you because I’m really bored like I said I was earlier, and have no one else to call.”
“Are you serious? Have you forgotten I know that you probably receive more calls than the customer care line of a network?”
“No, I do not.” But her chuckle said otherwise. “Well, since you know that, you should also know that I don’t really have a lot of people to call, since most people that are calling are people who creep me out. Matter of fact, I have less friends than the average person because weird people disturb me, and the ‘okay’ people like you stay away, because they think that I have a lot of friend―which isn’t exactly true.”
“But you have more friends than me, anyway.”
“You’re not from this earth, remember?” She took his mind back to their previous discussion.
“Okay, then I’m honored you found my number a worthy pick for this phone call. I was wondering you called me by mistake. Although, I still can’t get over the thought, that you did a raffle draw for whom to call out of your sea of contacts and I was just the lucky winner―”
“Don’t be silly.” Lani chuckled and sighed. “That’s not possible. First of all, the raffle draw thingy is just plain…far-fetched. Second of all, I’ve not called you before, so there is no way my hand could have slipped to hit the panel of your name on the call log or something. The only way I could call you by mistake is if I drunk dial you, and that’s so not happening because I’m not much of a drinker and I don’t drink on Sundays. I mean, who drinks on Sundays?”
“Hmm, stay pure for the Sabbath huh?”
“You have the idea. Let me guess, you don’t drink at all, do you?”
“I don’t drink, but I’ve had a taste of alcohol. At a party with friends, while I was sipping my Coke jejely―someone swapped my drink and well you know the rest. I was really annoyed, but what could I do? I just don’t get it why alcoholics can’t accept the fact that nonalcoholic people exist in this country. They just want everyone to be like them. Drinking alcohol. It’s annoying. These days I’m very cautious, the few times I go to parties. Don’t need to taste it again.”
“Yeah, it’s annoying. Hardened alcohol folks like to draw in people who like to stay clean. So it won’t look like they’re the ones with the flawed moral compass. But taking away the person’s choice to choose? It’s nonsense. And when you tell them that, they’d just tell you to loosen up and calm down.”
“You sound like you have experience in it.” A brief, undecided silence ensued before he spoke again. “Well, that’s that. I can only pray that I don’t have experience in it again. So, how was your day at church?”
“Oh, quite dramatic.” Her voice sounded sinful. “For the first time in life, I think I actually enjoyed the sermon.”
“Whoa, the pastor wasn’t preaching about nail colors and their best matching outfits, was he?”
“Don’t be silly,” She laughed. “Actually he was talking about marriage and all. How so many holy people take that same so called righteousness into their marriage and kill the spark that is supposed to exist between husband and wife. No romance, no nothing. Everything, everything―the lord is good. In the name of being holy, they wear big, oversized, unfashionable clothes because they’re going to heaven and are not concerned with the things of the world.”
“Wow,” He stifled a chuckle.
“Yeah, and their sex life―very poor also. They do it the conventional, missionary style and once they’re done, they’d even get on their knees to ask God for forgiveness for committing such a sinful act in the name of producing offspring. The thing was just cracking me up, I swear. Not just me, the entire congregation found it really amusing also. Sha, later he went on to give advice that people should do their utmost best in ensuring that the fire still burns even years after the marriage.
“Men should learn how to be more spontaneous and romantic. They should bathe with their wives, buy them gifts, take them out to dinner and occasionally tell their wives, they love them. He said that sex should be top notch also. As far as they don’t go outside the confinements, like doing what the bible forbids. Oral and Anal sex for instance. He told them that sex was made first and foremost for pleasure, and that reproduction is secondary.”
“Correct guy.”
“You’re not serious,” She giggled. “And so yeah they should enjoy each other when having sex. He even went into some very explicit details of foreplay and that one just cracked everyone up again. And inside my mind I was like if only church could be this fun every Sunday, ehn? What else did he say? He said they should also dress good and take care of their outward appearances. Look good and all for their spouses. Baba even used his wife as a point of reference to all the women in the church.”
“How?” His brows rose.
“He said and I quote: ‘If you’re looking for a woman to use as your role model for decent, fashionable dressing then my wife is here.’ And the woman started blushing and all. Well, it was really fun. There was also a very funny drama before the sermon. It wasn’t funny because the story was funny but because the presentation was bad. Really bad. They were forgetting their lines and improvising, backing the audience and everything was just in shambles. That was what made it funny.”
“And here I was thinking I had a terrific day, when the only thing different that went down in church was someone occupying my usual seat. I was left with no choice than to take the one in front of the person in question.”
“Oh, ehyah. I know it’s a big deal for someone like you.”
“Someone like me?”
“Yeah, someone like you. Obviously you’re the type that forms habits and finds it difficult to break for flimsy things as a seat. Lie that I’m not correct?”
He bit his lower lip. “You’re very smart, Lani―much more smart than you give yourself credit for.”
“Hmm, this is the first time anyone is saying such to me.” She didn’t sound taken aback, only fascinated. “Anyhoo, I have to go now. My eyes are closing and sleep has finally come―”
“It’s good to hear my company is very much valued.” He said tersely in a bitter tone. “And of course, bores you to sleep.”
“Oh no, c’mon you kept me awake.” She said in an apologetic voice. “Nothing can keep me awake when I really want to sleep, though. If you were boring me, I’d have slept on you but I’m telling you that I’d hang up, so I’m not sleeping on you. Two very different things.”
“Got it, see you tomorrow then. Be on time.” He chipped in for good measure.
“And loosen up, soldier!” She replied with a voluptuous laugh, before hanging up. Entranced, his gaze remained on the caller ID, reading her name continuously. The girl had roused up a lot of feelings he didn’t think himself capable of and the notion didn’t frighten him. Rather, it did the contrary.
It excited him.
-------------------------------------------
There goes the 5th chapter, that brings the first half of the first phase to a close. How’s the ride being so far? Is the story compelling? Have you been catching the fun past and present juxtapositions? Only way for me to know is through the comments, so please flood em’
Inkpharm still at the editing reins. See you, same time, next week. Have a splendid weekend.