Hurricane Sanem had struck again! Or one should say a tsunami for, at the sight of Sanem, a wave of emotions had crushed him hard in the chest, in a place he thought had died when she had disappeared. His heart seemed to have resumed its beating at the sight of Sanem ... Somehow, she was shouting at him ... He wondered what he had done as they had not seen each other for almost nine months now ...
He had heard the words "hospital", "now" and "baby" and still, he couldn't quite grasp Sanem's agitation. His eyes then moved from her beautiful brown gaze down to her quite large belly and he stopped breathing. "They had not seen each other for almost nine months", his mind echoed. Oh Lord! That was not supposed to be part of the reunion Can had planned. He had expected Sanem to be rigid and difficult. He had expected her to run away from him as it was her signature move. He had expected her to shout and scream at him. He had expected a thousand reactions but that .... What was ...
A dull thump and a sudden burn on his left cheek drew Can's attention back to reality. Did she just slap him? She was still shouting though ...
"Can! Move out of my way! We have to go!"
"You just slapped me!" whined Can.
"Oh come on, you're like Iron Man! You ..." and she couldn't continue as a contraction silenced her.
"Sanem? Are you okay?"
Sanem shot him a dark look and replied, "No, Can Divit! I'm not okay! So be useful and get us a cab!"
Can obediently complied as he understood that this was definitely NOT the time to have an explanation with her ... The three of them entered the taxi, Sanem in the middle. An old woman was sat on the other side and he had absolutely no idea of who she could be.
"So you're the hunk?" she said.
Sanem let out a loud wail.
Distressed by a situation in which he felt completely out of place, Can thought he heard it wrong.
"I'm sorry! You were saying?"
Sanem looked at Emel and her eyes implored her not to repeat what she had just said.
"I said. So you're the punk!"
"The punk?" God ... Can felt like he had landed into a parallel dimension. "My name is Can Divit. Nice to meet you Mrs ...?"
"Little punk! Don't you recognize me? I'm Emel ... Metin's grandmother ... We met when you were still in high school ..." explained the old lady.
Can smiled at her out of politeness but he guessed that she could see that he had no idea of who she was ... Ah Metin ah! Here we go again! His time would come ... But right now he had to deal with Sanem, and old woman and ... and a baby who was coming!
He turned to Sanem and asked innocently, "But, how did this happen?"
Sanem was fuming.
"Really?! That is the only question that has come to your mind? How? Did? This? Happen? Well Can Divit, may I remind you that you were there too!" she sneered.
"Okay, Okay Sanem ... What can I do to help? You're gonna have to tell me because I ..." he started.
Sanem cut him short, "Shut up and hold my hand". As she felt another contraction rising, she started to squeeze Can's hand harder and harder, making him grimace. He thought it safer and wiser not to comment on the pain she had just inflicted him.
The contractions were getting closer and fortunately they arrived quickly at the hospital. He helped Sanem to get out of the taxi and supported her as she was slowly walking towards the doors. A couple of nurses welcomed them and installed her on a wheelchair. Then he was told to go to the reception to fill in the admission papers.
"Name?" the nurse asked.
"Divit. Can." He replied without thinking.
A voice barked behind him. "My name, Can! Not yours ...!"
"Yes, yes of course! Aydın. Sanem."
The interrogation carried on and he tried to give the information needed the best he could. Once over, he was allowed to join Sanem in her room.
He entered, grabbed a seat and sat next to the woman he loved the most in the world, even if she looked quite frightening and scary for the time being. It was more and more difficult for Sanem to keep calm as the contractions accelerated in intensity, in length and frequency ... Can, in this very moment, felt quite useless and out of place. The words "baby", "mother", "father", "parents" were dancing in his head but they were not making any sense. Yet.
Sanem was quite agitated and Emel's constant chatter was not doing her any good. He decided to ask the old lady to get some drinks for them, leaving them finally alone. He risked a smile at her and Sanem smiled back.
"I'm happy that you're here", she confessed, taking his hand in hers.
"How can I help Sanem? I want to help ..." said Can.
"Tell me something that you've never told me. Anything ..." replied Sanem. Anything to distract her from the pain and the fear that were taking control over her. It was also an excuse to hear his voice. She had missed the music of his words.
"Okay ... Good idea ... You have seen the scar I have on my chest", started Can, knowing perfectly well that Sanem had a pretty good idea of his anatomy. He didn't pause for long, cutting short her reply as she was rolling her eyes at the ceiling.
"About 5 years ago, I was in Peru with a tribe, living deep within the jungle ... You've seen the picture in my office, haven't you? Well ... I was playing with the children when a jaguar came along."
Sanem was captivated by his story and the deep tones of his voice. She felt soothed and her heart had stopped aching.
"The kids managed to escape except for a little boy. The animal jumped, all claws out, aiming for the boy's throat but it hit me instead in the chest as I had rolled in its path", continued Can.
Sanem was all ears, drinking each of his sentences ... Naturally she remembered that scar ... She had mapped it with her fingers, wondering at the cause of such a mark on his flawless body ... Another contraction kicked in.
"Concentrate on me Sanem! Eyes on me! And breathe baby! Breathe", ordered Can.
"I'm fine, carry on."
"The men of the tribe arrived a few minutes later, chasing away the predator", explained Can.
He kissed her fingers and ended the story, "the wound was bad and I was bleeding heavily. They had to stitch me up with what they had. That's why that scar is so ugly."
"I like that scar", said Sanem, feeling quite flushed.
They were both smiling when a nurse came to check on the progression of Sanem's labour and announced that it was time to go. For the first time since their arrival, Can saw fear in her eyes. A terrible fear ... He then left his chair, bent above Sanem and kissed her. As she could taste Can's relief and hope on his lips, she responded with the same fervour. Full of a renewed confidence, he took her hands in his and kissed them as well.
"Don't worry", he whispered in a calm voice, "everything is going to be okay ..."
The nurse inquired, "Sir, are you coming?"
Looking at Sanem, he said, "If you tell me to go, I'll go. If you tell me to stay, I'll stay."
With a small grin, matching his, Sanem responded, "Please, stay." And she reached for his hand.
* * *
Sanem was now screaming her lungs out. Can was positioned at the top of the bed, next to Sanem's face, holding both of her hands. She was exhausted. Her beautiful face was covered with sweat, her lovely mouth distorted by pain, her voice was breathy and tearful ... but God how much he loved that woman.
It was coming to an end though, as the doctor told Sanem to push one last time.
She nodded, took a big breath and her shrill filled the theatre followed by the screams of a newborn baby.
"Congratulations, Mrs. Aydın. It's a healthy baby girl."
Sanem was out of breath, completely empty. She was fixating the ceiling, exhaling, letting the tears run down her cheeks. It was finally over.
Can wiped delicately her face, placing a tiny kiss on her forehead. He tilted his head up to look at the doctor when he saw her.
"My daughter", murmured Can.
As he contemplated his daughter for the first time, Can felt overwhelmed by a feeling he had never experienced before. An unconditional love. A love that required nothing in return. A love that would never fade nor die. An endless, unrequited love.
"Sir! Sir! You have to get out of the room now please! Sir!" called out a voice.
One of the nurses led him to the exit as the others rushed around the doctor who was now shouting orders. Can's eye caught a red puddle on the floor before the door was closed.
* * *
Can was pacing up and down the corridor, pausing in front of the door in hope to hear something inside but in vain. Emel was sat a few meters away, glancing now and then at this large man eaten up by anxiety. He couldn't settle down. Why was it taking so long? What happened? God he was getting crazy.
The door opened and the doctor came out.
"Mr. Can ... don't worry, everything is fine. Your wife was haemorrhaging ... It happens sometimes but we managed to stop the bleeding in time. You can come in now."
Can stepped in and the doctor added, "Don't stay too long please, she needs to rest".
"I understand, thank you doctor."
Can cautiously approached the bed. Sanem looked pale, her eyes closed and a perfusion had been inserted in her left arm.
"My love ... " whispered Can with a heavy heart.
A voice called him from behind, "Sir? Would you like to hold your baby?"
He turned away from Sanem, cradling his daughter in his arms. He felt both awkward and eager. He had never held a baby before. He was so afraid to drop her. Once confident and stable, he spent a long time studying her. She was so beautiful ... so innocent ... so pure ... just like her mother. How can someone you have never met before could inspire love, pride, tenderness, covetousness ... All at the same time? He felt so blessed! He never knew how much he craved for a family of his own ... until now. And there it was ... Can Divit, a father!
He kissed her on the head. A very small, very gentle kiss. He didn't want to hurt her with his beard ... He may have to give it a good trim now, he thought. She smelled so good ... He never thought he could be affected by another scent ever again. She smelled so fresh and pure. The baby opened her eyes and seemed to examine her father for a long time. Can smiled and noticed that she had inherited Sanem's hazel-coloured gaze and her long dark lashes. A dangerous chocolate ocean for the sailors who would willingly lose themselves in it. Can's heart shrunk at the thought that one day a boy would come to take her away from him ... And that thought made his very soul tremble.
"So what's her name?" inquired the nurse with an identification bracelet in one hand and a pen in the other.
"Divit", he said with a tinge of pride in his voice.
"She is asking for her first name, silly!" a fatigued voice laughed behind him.
Can turned around, walked up to the bed and placed carefully the baby in Sanem's arms.
"Alba ...Her name is Alba ... Alba Aydın Divit", she added.
"That's a very pretty name", commented the nurse, fixing the bracelet around the baby's wrist. "Does it mean something?"
"It's the Latin word for white", answered Can.
"It's also short for Albatross", joked Sanem.
They both giggled but soon the spectacle of little Alba, who had fallen asleep, made them silent and speechless. They were just staring at the most wonderful view they had ever seen in their whole life.
From the doorstep, unwilling to break the magic of the moment, Can's mom was observing the scene. She quietly took her phone out of her bag and took a photo of the newborn family. She checked the screen, sighed in content and left as quietly as she had arrived.
* * *
"No, Can! My answer is no!"
"Sanem!"
"Don't Sanem me, Can Divit! My answer is no!"