There she was standing in front of Can's front door ...again! She was so annoyed with herself! The past few weeks had been an ordeal. She had given her perfume to Fabri to get Can out of jail but she had not confessed him what she had done, Aylin had returned to the agency and above all Can's mother was back ... Of course Can had discovered pretty quickly Sanem's deal with the Italian businessman ... At the time she never thought it to be a betrayal but now ... now ... now she understood Can's point of view and the way he reacted! She had never seen him like that! She had wounded a lion and she was paying for it! Well she had deserved it! For someone with a photographic memory, she still had no clue! She had not learnt her lesson and they were back to square one. Ah Sanem ah! How stupid could she be! Can was so hurt. It was all her fault ...
A week ago, Fabri had launched Sanem's perfume and Can had learnt about it at the same time as the entire world! Sanem had never found the "right" moment to admit what she did and as before, it had backfired big time!
Can was already weakened by the return of his mother and this ... this betrayal was the last thing he could endure. After a terrible encounter on the rocks, he told her that he could not believe that she had gone behind his back! He could not believe that she had lied to him! He could not believe that she had not trusted Metin to get him out of jail! But above all, he still could not believe she had bargained her fragrance, HIS fragrance to free him. And, as painful as it was, it would actually be better for them to be apart from now on.
Sanem had stayed silent as he was yelling at her ... he was right. There was nothing she could say to defend herself ... That she gave Fabri her parfume to save him? Come on Sanem! The man was not in prison for murder! He didn't understand. She wanted to act as he did when he had thrown the check at Fabri's face ... but Can was not able to hear it. She had betrayed the very essence of their love. Her perfume, her fragrance that was vital to him. The man needed it as much as air to keep breathing. She knew. She knew all that but she couldn't undo what she had done on an impulse, as she was listening to her heart.
It had been only a week but it had seemed to last a century to Sanem ... Seven days that had tortured her as she could see him and talk to him ... but the connection, their connection was now lost ... Would it ever come back? Could he ever forgive her? Again? At that moment, Sanem came to the decision that she could not carry on like that. It almost killed her last time and she was not going to wait to wither slowly in agony, watching him laughing, smiling to other women ... no it was enough! It was time to act. And there she was standing opposite his front door.
It was already late, the sky menacing with large dark clouds above her head, the wind cold on her bare legs. She shivered but the chill of December was not the reason for her reaction. She had to be brave. She had to do it no matter what.
With a trembling hand, she knocked at the door. Her mind was blank. She could not think anymore. Time for action.
He finally opened the door, after what had seemed like an eternity. He was so handsome. Every time she saw him it was like looking at the sun. She was mesmerized, unable to look away from him. Him ... who stared at her, his face unreadable and emotionless. What had she done to this man? To her man?
He spoke but Sanem couldn't hear what he had said.
"Sanem! Sanem? What do you want Sanem? It's late and I'm really tired," he repeated.
"I'm sorry to disturb you. I won't be long I promise you. Please Can ... please it's important."
"Ok," he said reluctantly, "Come on in."
She thanked him and followed him in the living room. He sat on the couch. Not once did he look at her and Sanem felt her heart ripping into millions of tiny pieces. That was exactly what she had feared ... Stone-hearted, cold-faced Can ... but even so, she could not resent him. She had betrayed him in the most hurtful way and she knew he couldn't cope with that much pain and disappointment in his life at the moment.
"You can't even look at me," she whispered. "Okay ... It's all right ... I understand."
She had prepared a small speech but the words refused to leave her mouth. Her throat was dry. Tears were running down her cheeks. She was still standing up, next to the couch, numb and unable to breathe.
"Sorry I was wrong to come here tonight, I will go now ... I'm sorry for everything ..."
"That's it! You're sorry?" Can growled ...
"Yes Can, I'm sorry ...I just wanted to help the man I love. I wanted to feel useful for once ... and all these stares on my neck, blaming me for what had happened to you, to the agency ... You have no idea ..."
"Sanem ... Do you only understand what you have done to me? Your fragrance? Your parfume? Didn't you understand how special it is to me? I thought I had made it clear more than once ...", his voice was as cold as ice.
Sanem stopped dead. She was not crying anymore ... She was fuming!
"So that's all I am to you? A fragrance? For God's sake Can! Can you hear what you are saying?"
She clutched her fists, mad with anger.
She turned round and walked back towards the couch ... And she planted herself right in front him.
"So only the fragrance then? Hum Can? So you don't care about anything else, right?"
Can looked up for the first time and drilled his gaze into Sanem's eyes, dark with fury.
"Don't talk stupid Sanem ... You know what I mean ...," lowering his eyes back to the floor.
"No Can, I don't. Really I don't."
She stood up straight, almost regal; her chin defiant.
"So I suppose that this is meaningless to you then ... And you are not interested in any way ...", Sanem whispered in a provocative tone.
Sanem's dress was now lying on the floor ... Can's eyes widened and he looked up at Sanem, who was presently half naked, with her hands on her hips, still pissed off at him.
"So all this ...," as she gestured at her own body, " is not important to you!"
"Sanem! What are you doing? Have you lost your mind?"
In a second, Can was on his feet, Sanem's dress in his hand, trying to cover up her naked chest.
His eyes met hers and he was lost once again in Sanem's brown gaze ... She saw him swallowing hard. His breathing seemed affected too. "Time to act", she thought. "Be brave. Take what you want Sanem ... Do it now!"
Then Sanem placed her hands on both sides of Can's neck, going up and down very slowly. Can closed his eyes under the sensual massage and dropped her dress. Without realising, his hands touched Sanem's skin and both felt the shiver of passion that went through their bodies and minds.
Just a fragrance, hey Can Divit? Emboldened by her first move, Sanem took Can's hand and led him to the bedroom. She pushed him on the bed and went to close the door. Next she sat on his lap and started to unzip the sweatshirt he was wearing.
Can's mind must have gone completely numb as he was sitting there docile and quiet. He was completely at her mercy.
The sweatshirt was gone and Sanem resumed her massage, from the neck down to his abdomen. How she had longed to touch those rippling muscles, to circle the tattoo with her fingers, to plunge her nails into his warm skin ...
The pain awakened Can from his daze and he hugged closely Sanem's body against his, chest against chest, breath against breath, lips against lips ...
There was no holding back ... It was like a river breaking loose from a dam, torrents of lava flowing out of a volcano ... Sheer passion and days of frustration ...
Everything and everyone were gone ... Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing existed outside of this bedroom. No agency, no mother, no heartache ... Nothing else mattered.
They were kissing like they never did before ... no restraint, no limitation, no inhibition ... Can's experience kicked in and he took the lead. He undressed Sanem first and removed his clothes next. Both gloriously naked but silent. Eyes were talking, lips were talking, bodies were talking. The only sounds were those of lovemaking. Not once did they speak. Words were not necessary ... They both knew the damage they could do. In this magical moment of unison, the only language needed was that of love.
Sanem didn't know that physical love could be so rewarding and divine. Can caressing and kissing her naked skin was like touching her very soul. She felt no embarrassment and she returned every kiss, every touch, every move with the same fervour. They were finally one.
They made love several times that night, unable to quench the thirst they had for each other. Their bodies were tangled together, unable to let go, breathless, panting, moaning ... In moments of respite, their eyes were still making love. Finally, after many passionate hours, sleep caught them in its arms. As she was closing her eyes, she heard Can whisper "Sanem" behind her ear.
Unfortunately morning came, along with reality and bitterness. Sanem woke up, turned to face Can and watched him asleep ... He looked so young, so serene, so peaceful ... She knew the spell would break as soon as he would open his eyes. So, as quietly as possible, she placed a tender kiss on his cheek, brushed lightly his hair and inhaled his intoxicating scent. How could she live without him? She sighed, fighting the tears welling up and got dressed.
She opened the door, turned around for a final glance at the first and last man that she would ever love, and exited the bedroom.
Once in the street, she took her phone out and dialled Metin's number.
"Metin, sorry to call you that early but I have a favour to ask from you ..."