"And whenever you cry, tell yourself that, it is only temporary.
Remove the tears from your eyes and tell yourself that Jannah is waiting In Shaa Allah."
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Last night was one of those nights for Rida which were always heavy on the balance of struggle. She woke up abruptly struggling to breath, struggling to live for a few more minutes of her life. She had thought she would die that instant and she was near the end of her worldly life. The thought crossed her mind that she wasn't even prepared to meet her Lord but Malak um maut waits for none to rectify their respective deeds, he comes and pluck the souls of even those people whose deeds weigh low on the scale.
She tossed around to find her machine in the drawers meanwhile waking up Rehan from his deep sleep due to sudden thumping.
"Rida it's 3:30, what are you doing this late?" He had asked in a dense voice while Rida kept quiet as she was not in a position to answer him.
He sat up to analyse her and she breathed heavily for a while.
"One of those attacks." Replied Rida as she was relieved after taking her inhaler.
"Attack?" He asked in confusion.
"Yeah asthama attack." Said she as she lay down on her place for taking rest. It was so weird to live on those drugs every other day. Our life is so sensitive sometimes that its either live or die in a second. It is true that our death had been engraved from even before we were even born but every time the thought of death crosses our mind, it chills our spine as if it was something unexpected or unreal. It was weird to meet someone and then never look back to them but when their news of death arrives, it shakes our very foundation. After mourning for a little while we again forget the agonies of death and resume to our joyful life until the next.
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The new Queen is barshasanam
After Surat ul Alaq, Surah Muddaththir [74:1-5] was revealed.
Q) Enlist the first four convergent of islam in a row.
As Rida kept down her phone, she sighed as she pulled her sleeve towards the elbow to wash the dishes. If she was in her mum's house, her family wouldn't have let her done this because a bit of exertion after the attacks could lead to flaring up of the next attack again but since she was in her in-laws house, there was no way she would dismiss the work and take some rest. She had expected Rehan to help her as he had sometimes in the early days said that he would be his companion but nevertheless he was busy with his own work, he cannot come tired from work and do the chores of the house too, it was another aspect that some good sons or husbands help the ladies with the chores but every other person wasn't used to it. She wasn't a bit angry but may be sometimes expectations take you higher, the more it takes you higher the more brutal the fall is.
"Hey bhabhi, should I help?" Madiha jumped and sat on the platform of the kitchen next to the sink.
"Nah I will do it."
"But bhai told you are not well."
"Did he?"
"Yeah, so now let me do this and I am not listening to you." Said Madiha as she pushed Rida behind.
"And what did your brother tell you." Rida asked as she sat on Madiha's place.
"Umm he asked me to take care of you." Madiha said as she washed a spoon under the running tap.
Sometimes we judge people from the outer appearance of the old chest while they hold hidden treasures inside them.
"Really? When did he tell you that?"
"When everyone was asleep in the morning and only we two were awake, later when I was about to go then he would have informed ammi too to not disturb you because she was awake by then."
"Ohh."
"Now go, I'll do the rest."
"Are you sure?" Rida once again assured and ended up coming back to her room where she found Rehan working. She closed the door behind and walked towards him.
"Umm." She cleared her throat to which Rehan looked up but then resumed with his respective work.
"Did you ask Madiha to take care of me?" Asked Rida as she sat beside him to which Rehan hummed still indulged in his work.
"Rehaaaan." She said closing his laptop and file.
"What Rida?"
"Did I tell you how much I love you?" Said Rida holding his hand after keeping away his pen on the table.
"May be you did but you never meant it." He said jerking away her hand.
"What do you mean?" Said Rida after taken aback by his intensity of words.
"Nothing let me work please, I have an important assignment to do." Said Rehan as he picked up his pen and opened his file back.
"No you need to tell me why I didn't mean my love towards you."
"You really want to listen?" Rehan said looking directly at her with the intensity of his gaze.
"Yeah of course."
"The people who love us doesn't hide things from us." Rehan said as he abruptly closed his file and slammed it on the table.
"And what did I hide from you?" She said still staying calm towards Rehan because she knew Rehan was a man who had temper issues sometimes but was a complete sweetheart in other times.
"Please don't act like you don't know Rida, I don't like when some people know the actual thing and they act dumb." Rehan answered.
"I am not acting dumb Rehan, I actually have no idea what you are talking about. Will wahi come and inform me about it?" Rida said while trying to calm down her flaring anger.
She was okay until Rehan was talking other things but telling her that she was untrue in her behaviour was actually not acceptable to her.
"Why did you not tell me that you have asthma?" Rehan finally blurted out the cause of his anger.
"Wait... I thought you know about it already?"
"Oh really? Will a wahi come and inform me about it?" Rehan said throwing back the same statement to her.
"But seriously I thought you know about it so I didn't bother to inform you." Said Rida running her hand on her temple.
"If you think you have told me then remind me when."
"I don't remember Rehan and tell me why does it even matter when we loved each other?" Rida said throwing a question at him.
"It does matter Rida, it does. You said you loved me but your actions didn't prove your love towards me by hiding things and not being truthful. Don't you know that asthma can be genetic and our kids can go with the problem too?" Said Rehan gathering his things and getting up from his seat.
"Won't they be my kids too?" Rida's power to ignore things came to an end and despite of struggling not to cry, a tear escaped her eyes to which she wiped instantly.
"I am talking about my kids right now." Said he while going out from the room and closing the door behind her.
She sat remembering when she told him about it but her brain failed to function. She sat there trying to calm her self down but every time she wiped her tears, a fresh set of tears would roll down her cheeks. She couldn't understand where she went wrong. He was all good the last night, comforting her and helping her. He was all good when he told Madiha to take care of her but why did he change colour after that? Does that mean he has been whispered something against her? Sometimes when people behave irrationally without the happening of any event is because someone somewhere has talked behind their backs. It is not only the jinns who whisper bad about people but also the men around us. Does that mean their relationship was so fragile that any third person could easily break it?
How could Rehan do it to her? He was a wise man, at least until this fight took place. Rida couldn't stop her hiccups which usually get along crying, leading her again to struggle with her breathings. It was the first time, she didn't want to consume her inhaler, it was the first time that she would die rather be accused of lying to her husband. She wanted to punish herself for not clearing the matter in the early days but she knew that this body was a gift from Allah subhana wa ta'ala and the right to hurt the body only lies in the hands of Allah. When the suffering was out of hand, she relieved herself and went to sleep, knowing the fact that it would be a sleepless night.
Rule 1: Never hide things from your spouse. Marriage is a bond of two souls where trust is one of the major quality which keeps you both along. If you're going to be tied in a bond then let your future spouse know about something that you think should be uncovered, which you think may lead you both to problems in the future. In short, everything that is concerned with your relationship and would affect it later should be revealed to your spouse. Sometimes the outcome of not revealing the information is worse than when it is told later or even more worse when a third party informs them about it.
Share your experiences about such issue in the comment if you have any, to enlighten the readers (if you are willing to). May be your experiences could save someone from such fights.