"Does it really matter?" of course it matters genius.
"Yes," I plead, trying my best to sound casual but you think he can hear the panic in my voice?
"Amanda forwarded it to me." My boss—of course, she is the only one who had it—this is creepy beyond measure.
My heart won't stop racing and I can feel my cheeks heating up. "How do you know Amanda?" I manage to spit out.
"Shouldn't we try to fix your article that is due tomorrow morning?"
I untangle my fingers from his and sit up straight. I want—no I need some distance between him and I. I feel naked right now.
I take a bite out of my tiramisu to distract myself from my own thoughts.
"Is the tiramisu to your liking?" he asks and I nod my head. I am not even sure how it tastes right now. I feel a lump in my throat every time I swallow.
"Mia," he roars and does he not realize he is not a feline?
"Uhun," I mutter, not bothering to look up from my plate. He will not hypnotize me with his eyes yet again. I take a sip from my tea and take out my phone. I have a missed call from Hannah, one of these days I will have to talk to her. I hate confrontations but it is inevitable for the future of our relationship. Plus, I miss her terribly.
"I love you," I text her. I know we've had a few hostile days but she is still the love of my life. I keep my phone down and take another bite of the tiramisu. My phone buzzes, it's Hannah calling. I immediately pick up.
"How was your first day?" I can't help but ask.
"Please come home. I love and I need you and I miss you to pieces." Her raspy voice instantly makes me smile. I can't wait to be home and tell her all about my crazy life lately. So much has happened in the past 24 hours.
"I am just finishing up dinner but I'll be home soon. I miss you more and I love you the mostest."
"I am sorry for being a cunt," well I won't be arguing with that.
"It's okay, do you need me to pick you something to eat?"
"Nah, I am good. Just ordered Chinese. I'll save the fortune cookie for ya!" I collect the fortune—no I will not stop doing it.
"I'll see you later alligator."
"In a while crocodile." We both giggle and I hang up. I feel better—50 pounds off my chest better—have something to look forward to life better.
"Boyfriend?" Liam asks me as I keep the phone. His eyebrows are up and his forehead is scrunched up.
"Thank you very much for a lovely dinner," I clearly say each word with fake sincerity and then dramatically pause, two can dodge questions.
I smile at him and I don't think he finds me amusing at all. His frown deepens and I feel something tug at my heartstrings. I want to kiss the frown on his forehead away but do I have the liberty to do just that right now?
"Liam?" I can't keep ignoring him like this—I've tried long enough already. Maybe by being open and transparent, I can inspire him to do the same.
"A girl can really dream," Inner bitch remarks and I think she's right.
"Mia," he says icily. His aloofness hurts—I really want to fix it—us. Whatever.
"That was my best friend on the phone." I wave my white flag.
"Hannah?" What the—how does he know?
"How do you know?"
"I just do," he proudly states. The playfulness in his eyes is back—there is a lighthearted come get it mischievousness about him.
"Will you ever answer any of my questions?"
"Will I? he asks me back, his left eyebrow going up. Is this what people call flirting?
I curl my lips downwards, making a sad face.
"Don't be sad!"
"How do you know Amanda?"
"She did a GQ feature on me last year," Oh. Why do I have a feeling there is something more—something he is not telling me.
"Did she feature on you?" I ask, holding my breath. Please don't be sleeping with my boss.
"Do you really want to know Mia?"
"Do you Mia?" Inner voice chimes in.
"Why else would I ask?" Please lord. She is perfection in human flesh... Strong, bold, fierce and everything I want to be one day.
"You do want to fuck Liam, and if you think of it, she is literally everything you want to be one day." Inner bitch comments and sometimes I want to shove valencia down her throat so that she has a filter.
"We've fucked each other on and off for a bit," he casually states. Why would a guy who can get a girl like Amanda and Sophia ever be interested in me?
"Did you guys date?" I can't help but ask. My chest burning with a feeling I am not yet climatized to—she's just fucking everything and a slice of bread.
"I don't date. We've fucked that's about it." How can he be so casual about it? If I could date Amanda, I totally would.
"Do you guys still fuck?"
"No."
Marco clears the table, and Will calls for the cheque.
He doesn't date. I don't hook up. We can never have anything. End of story.
Right?