Niall had been working on the harmony of a new song when the phone rang.
"Hey, babe." He said casually, scribbling down his last idea for the song he was working on. He waited to hear his best friend's cheerful voice. Instead, he heard soft shaky breaths and sniffles. "Sienna?"
His heart began to race.
"I'm not okay." The words were choked out in a cry that gutted him.
Call me if that changes, he had told her. He knew what her words meant. Things had changed. She needed him.
He dropped his pen, sat his guitar down, and sat up in his seat.
"What happened, babe?" He asked her softly.
"I'm so tired of it." Sienna cried into the phone.
"Tired of what, Enna?" Niall worried. "Talk to me."
"I'm tired of feeling like this." She explained. "I'm tired of this ache in my chest."
"Enna, where are you? Where's Luke?" Niall asked calmly, trying to mask his fear.
"Luke's on stage." Sienna told him.
"Is there anyone there with you?" He asked.
"Ashton was outside the door a minute ago." She admitted. "I can't tell him." She shook her head, wiping away tears with one hand. "I can't put that burden on him."
What burden, Ashton wondered as he listened through the door.
"Enna, he wants to help." Niall assured her. "He's been through this."
"He's been in love with Calum?" Sienna retorted.
Niall's mouth fell agape, as did Ashton's who was still standing outside the bathroom door.
Holy shit, Ashton thought.
So that's what this is about, Niall realized. She misses Calum. She's not trying to hurt herself.
"Well, no." Niall finally said.
"Every time I look at him, I can't help but feel awful. This weight on my chest...I'm tired of it." She cried. "I'm miserable and he's fine." More cries came with the words. "How is he okay?"
"Enna-"
"I meant nothing to him," She cried. "And that hurts." She paused to catch her breath. "And I miss you...and I don't know what to do."
Niall knew she needed him. He knew what he needed to do.
"Babe," Niall said sweetly. "If that's true, that he meant more to you than you meant to him, then he's a damn fool and you're better off without him." He promised her. "You are Sienna Hemmings. You're amazing." He reminded her. "I know it hurts now, but give it some time."
She knew he was right. It would get better with time, but she was tired of her whole body aching every time he walked in the room. She was tired of beating herself up over her feelings for him.
"I know it will get easier with time, but," she paused to take a deep breath. "I'm so tired of feeling like there's this giant weight on my chest." She sighs again. "I know this is ridiculous to be so upset over some fling, but it felt real, you know?"
"I know, Enna." He said softly. "It's not ridiculous."
"I just wish you were here." Sienna admitted. "I love you, Ni." She sniffled.
"I love you, Sienna." He said with a sad smile he was glad she couldn't see. "Will you do something for me?"
"Anything." She said quickly, taking a deep breath.
"Talk to Ashton." He pleaded. "He just wants to help. Even if you don't want to tell him everything, a good hug can go a long way."
"Okay." Sienna let out a shaky breath. She'd calmed down enough to stop crying and catch her breath.
A hug did sound pretty good to Sienna right now.
"It's gonna' be alright, babe." Niall promised her.
"I'll talk to you later, yeah?" She said.
"Of course."
"Thanks for being here, Ni." She said quietly.
"Always."
With that, she ended the call and pulled herself from the floor.
She assumed Ashton had returned to the stage—the show must go on, after all—but when she finally opened the door she was met with a tall, curly-haired drummer with a remorseful look on his face.
She had stopped crying and pulled herself together, until she saw Ashton. When their eyes met, she knew he'd heard everything.
She collapsed against his chest and her cries were muffled by his shirt.
Ashton held her tightly as she cried.
Suddenly, everything made sense to Ashton. Why Sienna and Calum had frozen each other out, why Sienna had been so upset and closed-off, why Calum had been so irritable.
"You heard?" Sienna said shakily.
"I heard." Ashton nodded.
"Are you gonna' tell Luke?" She worried.
"No." He said before pressing a kiss to her head. "You could've come to me, Enna." Ashton promised her.
"I thought you would be angry with me for-"
"Falling in love?" He interrupted her.
Sienna lifted her head from Ashton's chest to look up at him. He gave her a sad smile and wiped the tears from her face with his thumbs.
"I'm pathetic, right?" She asked him, pursing her lips to keep them from quivering. "Falling for a guy who "doesn't do relationships."" She took a shaky deep breath in attempt to steady herself. "A guy I'm forbidden to be with anyway."
"You're not pathetic." Ashton said in a more serious tone. "We can't help who we love, Sienna." Her eyes flickered down and Ashton bent down to meet them. "There's a million songs written about it." He said with a chuckle which made her smile softly. "I love you, Sienna. You can come to me with anything, okay?"
Sienna nodded.
"Can we talk about this more later?" Sienna wondered. "When we have more time?"
"Of course."
"Will you just hold me a bit longer?" She asked him quietly.
Ashton pulled her back into a loving embrace. His warmth and the strength of his arms around her made the aching in Sienna's chest disappear for a moment.
She took a deep breath and a small smile formed on her lips as she listened to his heart beat.
"Ashton!" A voice said suddenly. Sienna and Ashton separated to see David standing in the doorway. "Get your ass back on stage!" He scolded before his gaze landed on Sienna's flushed and tear-stained face. "Oh," He said quieter. "I didn't know."
"It's okay." Sienna wiped her face. She looked back to Ashton. "Go on."
"But-" Ashton began to protest, but David interrupted.
"Only one song until they'll come off for a break before the encore." David explained. "Just stay with her until then." He instructed before giving Sienna a sympathetic look and disappearing down the hall.
Ashton looked down at Sienna.
"You alright?" He wondered.
"Yeah." She sniffled. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were bloodshot from crying. "I'm sorry I scared you. I know you probably thought I was relapsing."
"Don't apologize." He said sadly. "I'm just relieved you didn't try to..." His words faded, he didn't want to talk about what he had feared. "Come here." Ashton extended his arms to her. Sienna stepped into his embrace quickly.
"I understand why you kept it from me." He told her. "You didn't want me to have to keep a secret from Luke, right?"
Sienna nodded against his chest.
"I'm glad you know." She admitted. "It feels good to finally lift some of the weight off my chest." She explained. "I'll tell you everything. I just can't live like this anymore."
"You don't have to." Ashton promised her. "I'll do anything I can to help. I'm here." He stroked a hand across her back as he held her.
"What's going on?" A worried voice cut through the air, two new faces rushed into the room. Ashton and Sienna looked to find a wide-eyed Luke.
"We saw you run off." Michael added quickly.
"Are you alright?" Luke asked quickly, noticing she'd been crying. "What's the matter?"
Sienna was about to answer when a third person entered the room.
Calum slowed his pace when his eyes met Sienna's. He froze where he stood.
He wanted to speak, but he couldn't bring himself to form the words.
Sienna felt a hand intertwine with hers. She looked down at Ashton's hand, then to his eyes. He gave her a smile.
"I'm okay." Sienna answered Luke, meeting his eyes first, then Michael's. "Just needed a minute."
Luke looked to Ashton for confirmation. Ashton gave him a small nod before looking to Calum. He couldn't read Calum's expression. He wasn't sure if he had worried for Sienna or if he simply didn't care.
If he didn't care, that wasn't like the Calum he had known for so many years.
If he did care, why was he trying so hard to look like he didn't?
Calum's eyes met Ashton's.
He saw the same look in Calum's eyes that he'd seen in Sienna's.
He loves her, Ashton realized. He wondered how he'd been so blind to it before. That's why he's pushing her away.
Calum could see Ashton putting the pieces together, his heart rate sped up rapidly.
"Boys," David's voice filled the air.
Calum was relieved.
"Time for the encore."
Calum quickly followed after David, eager to escape Ashton's decrypting eyes.
Unlike Calum, Michael and Luke hesitated, not entirely convinced Sienna was alright.
Sienna stepped forward to hug Luke quickly.
"I'm okay." She promised before pulling back from the embrace to press a kiss to Michael's cheek.
Sienna could see the worry on their faces fade, but not entirely disappear.
"I'm right behind you."