"Hello everyone," Doctor Briggs walked around to each member of the Jauregui family, shaking their hands. "I'm a psychotherapist. I've been a marriage counsellor for almost ten years." She took a seat opposite to them. "Can you please introduce yourselves? I'll like to get to know each of you."
Maggie piped up and started talking first. "Well the name's Maggie Jauregui. Some call me Margarita. I've been a model for IMG since I was like 18. I spent two years in college studying Business Management, and might I add, I hated every minute of it." She side eyed her parents. Maggie never really liked school per say, so when she was given the opportunity to become a model, she took it without hesitation. And ever since then, she had been working her ass off doing what she loved.
Doctor Briggs nodded. "And are you single?"
"Why? You're trying to go out?" Lauren elbowed her sister, who just laughed in response. "I'm kidding! But I'm kinda seeing someone; but we're not serious or anything. It's on and off."
Clara and Mike turned their heads in the direction of their younger daughter. The look of surprise on their face didn't go unnoticed by Doctor Briggs.
"You're dating someone?" Mike asked Maggie, who simply shrugged in response.
Doctor Briggs made a note of this in her notepad. "And Mike? Care to tell us a little bit about yourself?"
Mr Jauregui cleared his throat. "Well for starters, my name is Michael Jauregui. I was born and raised in Puerto la Cruz, Venezuela. I moved to Miami when I was 16, where I attended the University of Miami Business School, and I eventually obtained my master's in Business Analytics."
Lauren sighed when her father started to talk. The thing about her dad, is that he loved talking about himself. When they were younger, that was all he ever did. When he tried to talk to his children, he always wound up talking about himself or his business because he didn't know his children enough to ask about them.
"When I was twenty three, I pooled together with a colleague of mine, and we started a car company."
Doctor Briggs observed the expression on everyone's faces when Mr Jauregui was speaking. "I'm assuming it's the Jauregui brand of hybrid cars?"
Mike nodded. "Yes, it's actually one of the biggest brands out there. I would've loved to have my daughters involved in the company," he looked from Lauren to Maggie; his gaze staying longer on her youngest child, "but they had other plans."
"Everyone has to make their own paths in their life, Mr Jauregui. Your daughters chose theirs," Doctor Briggs said. "Tell me about you and your wife. How did you two meet?"
Mike adjusted his tie before he began to speak. "Well, we actually met through a colleague of mine. His wife and Clara, were friends. He thought we would've liked each other, so they introduced us. We hit it off immediately," he smiled at his wife. "We got married when we were 27, and had Lauren about a year later. She was truly what Clara and I needed."
Lauren sighed. "Yeah, probably just to have this picture perfect family to show off to your friends," she muttered to herself.
"Did you say something, Lauren?" Mike asked his daughter, she shook her head 'no' in response.
Chelsea then turned towards Mrs Jauregui, who was sitting next to Maggie. "Clara? Care to tell us about yourself?"
Clara straightened herself before addressing the therapist, "Well, my name is Clara," she possessed a thick Spanish accent, making it a bit difficult for Doctor Briggs to understand her. "I was born in Asunción, Paraguay, where I lived until I was 25. I had visited Miami when I was 26, that's when I had met Mike." She glanced at her husband. "I had a measly salesclerk job. I didn't go to college or anything like that, when I met Mike, I was confused as was I shocked that someone like him could love me," Clara shrugged. "But he did, and we managed to make it work for many years."
Maggie blew out heavily through her mouth when her mother finished speaking, causing all heads to turn towards her. "What?" She glanced to and fro from everyone.
(PS. This me sitting in during my law lectures 💀)
"Is there something you'll like to add, Maggie?" Doctor Briggs asked the youngest of the four. She shook her head 'no', crossed her legs and sat back.
"You may proceed."
Doctor Briggs nodded, then began to address everyone. "The reason that you're all here today is to help Lauren, understand and work through her insecurities. Lauren, if I may?" She directed the question towards her client who nodded. "Well, Lauren came to me a couple months ago seeking help in dealing with some issues, that had been disrupting her in her personal life. And in order to accept these things about her that she cannot change, and to forgive those who have hurt her, she needs to hash out the root of her problems; which revolves around her family."
Lauren was a tad bit too nervous. She didn't want to have to sit down with her parents and talk about these things. They were never the family to talk about feelings. She was fine with Maggie being there, but she felt as though her parents would be secretly judging her.
"But before we go any further, I'll like to inform you that I will be making notes throughout our session. Is that okay with you all?" They nodded. "So, let's dive right in, shall we?" She turned towards her client. "I'll like for each of you to tell a secret that no one knows."
The room had immediately fell quiet. The shuffling and movement that the Jaureguis were doing had instantly stopped.
"You can take your time, I'm not singling out anyone. So whoever is willing to go first, may begin."
Lauren sighed heavily. "I'll go first." Maggie grabbed her hand, as she was sat next to her elder sister and gave it a light squeeze. Lauren was grateful for that. "I uh...I cheated on Camila...with Hailee."
"You what?!" Mike asked in shock. He looked at his wife and Maggie. "Why does no one seem shocked besides me?"
Maggie shrugged. "Maybe because you're never around, father?"
"Don't start, Maggie," Mike said sternly.
His younger daughter rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath. "dOnT sTaRt MaGgIe," she mocked him.
"How can you do that to your wife?"
Lauren snapped her head towards her dad. "Are you being for real right now, dad? It was ONE fucking kiss that I regret because I know it hurt Camila, but don't you dare, try to act as though you're better than me!"
"Lauren, sweetie, calm down," Clara tried to soothe her daughter's outburst. "This is not the time nor the place."
Doctor Briggs interjected. "I beg to differ, Mrs Jauregui, this is a safe place where you all can talk about whatever is that's troubling you. Whatever you say here will stay amongst these four walls."
"I had an abortion," Maggie blurted out, causing the room to fall silent yet again. "About two weeks ago...I had an abortion."
Lauren opened and shut her mouth continuously for a few moments until she collected herself. She saw the distraught look on her sister's face, she pulled Maggie into her arms. "It's okay, it's okay."
"No it's not," Maggie mumbled into Lauren's chest. "I'm fucking stupid. I feel horrible."
Lauren kept her sister in her arms, shielding her from the words that her parents were soon to spew at her.
Mike's jaw tightened, as he stared directly in front of him, not making any eye contact with his daughter. "Do you enjoy making these stupid mistakes, Margarita?" He pinched the bridge of his nose, then turned his gaze towards her. "Do you enjoy embarrassing yourself and making a fool of your family? This isn't the first time that you've embarrassed us!" Maggie flinched at his tone. "Can't you for once learn to act like an adult? If you're not willing to settle down, don't go around acting like...like some sort of WHORE!"
"That's ENOUGH!" Lauren yelled out, startling her parents. "Can't you see how much this is hurting her?!" She gestured at her sister who was still clutching onto her. "Why...why are you always so fucking hard on her?!"
"Lauren," Maggie drawled out weakly. "Don't."
"No!" Lauren said sternly, gently pushing her sister off her. "He's always up your ass, he's always acting like he's been the father we needed...you needed." She looked at her sister sadly.
Maggie shook her head 'no' and stared at her father. "I'm sorry. I'm such a disappointment. I'm sorry I didn't go ahead with getting my degree. I'm sorry for pushing everyone away when I tried to kill myself so many years ago," She exhaled shakily. "And I'm sorry for loving you...when you didn't love me."
Lauren placed her hand on her sister's shoulder, "Maggie..." she began but was cut off.
"I've tried so many years since, to make you proud of me, to make you love me again the way you used to, but I know it's useless," Mike avoided his daughter's gaze as much as he could. The guilt sinking in. "You can't even look at me," Maggie laughed but the hurt was evident in it.
Clara decided to speak up. "Maggie, what you're saying, it's not true. We're not disappointed in you. Not one bit."
"Then why...why is it that at every single party you guys hosted, all you did was talk about Lauren? Lauren this...Lauren that?!" She tried her best to bite back the tears. Doctor Briggs sat observing the interaction between the family. It seemed to her that there were so many things left unsaid amongst them. She wasn't going to interrupt them.
"This isn't just about being stuck in Lauren's shadow is it?" Mike asked Maggie.
"Dad..." Lauren sighed. "Do you really not see what's happening?" Mike furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "You have a daughter desperate for your approval. Why do you think she even went to college to study something she doesn't like in the first place? Why'd you think she even picked up a book in the first place?"
"Maggie...I," Mike stuttered out but he couldn't form a coherent sentence.
"You had a daughter, just out of rehab, who was begging for comfort, for her parents to look at her and finally see her. But all they seemed to care about was that stupid company," Lauren ran her hands through her hair. "And you also, have a daughter who was trying to hold the family together, trying to stop the dam from bursting while you were busy breaking it."
After a moment or two, when no one said anything, Chelsea spoke up. "Mike, Clara, do you have something to say?"
Clara looked at Mike and nodded at him. "Maggie..I...I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't the father you needed. I'm sorry I was too consumed in my own world, to notice just how much you were hurting...I.."
Maggie raised her hand to stop him. "Sorry doesn't mean anything, anymore, dad."
"Maggie," Doctor Briggs began, "It's clear that your parents lack of involvement has negatively affected you throughout your earlier years of life. Supportive parenting contributes to the development of life satisfaction of a child." Doctor Briggs addressed Mr and Mrs Jauregui. "It might be painful to talk about what happened, but I think we all know, that now is the right time for us to broach this topic."
Lauren raised her hand. "I don't think.."
"Really, Laur?" Maggie began, "I think we all know that dad cheated on mom."
"Wait what?"
"What?"
"You knew?"
Maggie sighed heavily. "I may look stupid but I'm not dumb."
"I..I didn't know that you knew," Lauren began. "I didn't want you to find out, you were already dealing with so much, and...and having to deal with that too? I didn't think you deserved that."
Maggie smiled and took her sister's hand in hers. "I knew. I just pretended I didn't. I thought the better thing to do was to act as though it wasn't hurting."
"Living in a house that wasn't a home, slowly watching your parents' love for each other dwindle away," Lauren said. She intertwined her fingers with Maggie's, "You stopped bringing home flowers for mom every Friday night when you got home from work, you went from going on dates every Saturday night, to barely ever coming home. While Maggie was fast asleep in her room, I would sneak down the stairs and I would see you, mom, waiting at the bottom of the staircase for dad. Then when he would come home, I'd run back up to my room, and I would hear the loud whisper yelling going on between the two of you."
Realisation had finally hit Mr and Mrs Jauregui, their daughters had known all about their troubled marriage, and even though they didn't mean for it to affect their daughters, it did.
I used to like to think, that there was no such thing as a 'broken family'. That family were family whether they were good or bad. But as you grow up, and you start to realise things, you start to see that your parents no longer love each other, but they just stay together because they were familiar with one another. Family is made in the heart and that the only time that bond of 'family' is null, is when the ties in the heart has been severed.
And even if you hate those ties, those people will still be your family because whatever you hate about them, you'll hold it in your heart and it will always be with you.
One day, you're six and your dad was your hero. You wanted to grow up to be a woman like your mom, so that you could've met someone who loved you the same way your father loved your mother. Then as you grow older, you'll realise that it's all just some sort of masquerade ball, and everyone has these masks on and they're hiding their true feelings behind them.
But sooner or later, the clock will strike twelve at midnight, and the illusion would fade, and you'll realise just how fucked up and broken your life and family really is.
"Mija, I didn't know you knew or even heard all that," Clara looked at her daughter with sadness in her eyes.
Lauren shook her head. "You don't know a lot of things mom." She sighed. "Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me. It took me years to finally accept that someone like Camila could love someone like me."
"What do you mean, 'someone like Camila'?" Doctor Briggs asked Lauren. "Care to elaborate?"
"Camila was everything that I wasn't. She was popular, she was smart and she was beyond beautiful. Then out of the blue, she noticed me, and then she told me that she had feelings for me," Lauren shrugged. "I found it so hard to believe because I thought that it wasn't going to work out."
Chelsea made her notes. "And why did you think it wasn't going to work?"
Lauren looked at her parents, who were visibly shrunk in their seats. The thing about most parents is that they never really know that they're hurting their children, or maybe they know and they just couldn't seem to care if they were or not.
"I saw what happened between my parents...so I just thought that it would've happened to me too. They're from too different worlds, and it didn't work out, so why would it work out between Camila and I?" Lauren asked. "My mother is the perfect example of a trophy wife. No offence mom. And dad? You're chauvinistic. You always believed that you were superior to not only mom but all of us."
"Mike?" Doctor Briggs called Mike's attention to be drawn to her. "Can you tell your daughters why you did what you did?"
Mr Jauregui swallowed visibly. "I don't...I don't think I even know how to begin or explain why I cheated on your mother. I need you both to know how much I loved her and I still do, but it's just not the same when we were newly wed. Over time, the feelings began to fade, and I wanted something more. I grew bored of our typical routine, and I guess, in a way, I grew bored of Clara."
Maggie scoffed but didn't say anything.
"I found a sense of excitement when I was with Darcey. I didn't love her, but the feeling I got when I was with her, made me realise that I was missing something while I was married to your mother," Mike admitted. The truth is, Mike was an asshole, but he did love his wife and he did love his daughters, but when he had something for too long, he would get bored of it. He treated his family as though they were his possessions. "I didn't mean for any of that, I didn't mean to hurt any of you. I've apologised to Clara, and I need to apologise to the both of you. I need for the both of you to know just how sorry I am for hurting you all these years, and for ruining your perspective of love."
Lauren nodded in understanding. She didn't hate her father, nor did she hold any animosity towards him over the years for what he did, but the same couldn't have been said about Maggie.
"Before we go any further," Doctor Briggs began. "Mike, you've accepted what you did wasn't right and you've apologised for it. Which is a step in the right direction. I cannot make your family forgive you, but they know your side of the story," Mike shook his head. He looked at Maggie who could sense his gaze on her but she chose not to acknowledge him. "But, your relationship with your wife has impacted Lauren's view on love, and because of that, she may not voice it or feel it all the time, but she sees Camila as her superior. And because of the way your marriage turned out, she thinks that hers and Camila's would end the same way yours did."
It should be noted, that a marriage is never fifty-fifty. It's always something along the lines of seventy-thirty, or sixty-forty. Someone is going to fall in love first, and it's going to take the other some time to fall in love. Someone puts someone else up on a pedestal, while the other sees themselves as an unequal. They see themselves as though they aren't good enough for the other person. Someone works very hard to keep their marriage working, while the other is just in for the ride. Someone has so many insecurities to deal with, while the other is comfortable with who they are and who they're married too.
It's never easy.
"So what I need for you to do, Mike, I need you to tell Lauren, that her marriage isn't going to end up like yours. Take all that you know about Camila and your daughter, and tell her what she needs to hear."
Mike turned in his seat so that he could face Lauren, but then he shook his head and stood. He approached her and knelt where she was sitting, taking her hand in his. "Lauren...I know that I wasn't the perfect father, and I know that I ruined the one marriage, the first type of love that any child would idolize at that age, but you and Camila? You're not your mother and I."
"Thank God they aren't," Maggie muttered under her breath. She had her arms folded at her chest as she was slouching on the couch, listening to what her dad was telling her sister.
"When I look at you and Camila together, I see so much love," a small smile graced Lauren's lips. "And I know with every fibre of being, with my whole heart, that you two are going to end up making your marriage work. Whatever obstacles that life throws at the both of you, I know that everything is going to work out."
Lauren smiled as her father brought her hand to his lips and gently kissed it.
"Stay honest with each other. Talk about your feelings, insecurities, apathy, everything. If you try to hide anything from Camila, that secret will sooner or later swallow you up from the inside out. Don't try to deal with things by yourself. Be open and honest with each other. Let Camila help you and give you the support that you need," Mike added trying to encourage his daughter. He knew he had wronged her, but he didn't want what happened between him and Clara to ruin Lauren's happiness, because everyone knew just how much Lauren had loved Camila.
Doctor Briggs nodded happily as she wrote in her pad. "It's better to look at the problem during its initial stage than to disclose it when it's all too late."
Mike slowly rose from the floor, clasping his eldest daughter on the shoulder. "Again, I'm so sorry, for everything."
"It's okay, papi," Lauren smiled. She saw the sad look in her father's eyes as his gaze stopped on Maggie. He opened his mouth to say something, but he held his tongue.
"Clara?" Doctor Briggs addressed Mrs Jauregui who was looking on at the interaction between her ex husband and daughter. "Would you like to add anything to what, Mike has said?"
The woman nodded. "I..yes. Lauren, but not only you, Maggie...I need the both of you to listen to me," her daughters faced her; Maggie reluctantly. "I love you. I love the both of you so much, and I know we haven't always seen eye to eye, and I haven't been the mother you both deserved, but there has not been a moment when I regretted having the both of you," Clara stood and took a seat between the two of her children, taking them both into her arms. "I know you've been a troubled child, Maggie, but I love you. You've never been a disappointment and I'm sorry, so so sorry that you've spent all these years thinking that." She brought Maggie closer to her and placed a loving kiss on her cheek. "Tú eres mi estrella."
Maggie smiled even though she didn't want to. "I love you, mami. Even though you've been a trash mother, I love you."
Clara kissed Maggie a top her head. She then addressed Lauren, "I don't want you to ever doubt Camila's feelings for you. That woman is madly in love with you. The world can see it, and I know you can see it. She'll be crazy to ever walk away from you, She's your wife, mija and you have a daughter together, everything will work out for you and your little family. Don't do what Mike and I did." Clara kissed Lauren on her cheek. "Tú eres mi luna."
"I love you, mami," Lauren kissed her mother's cheek. "Thank you. I'll try...I'll try to let go of these insecurities that I have. I deserve to be able to love Camila without thinking that one day she'll leave me. I love her and she loves me and that's all that should matter."
Doctor Briggs looked at the interaction between the mother and daughters. She could see that even though the family had their problems, Clara and her daughters still had a bond, which was far stronger than what they had with their father. Lauren had one, but unfortunately, it seemed as though Maggie didn't have one with Mike and possibly, she didn't even want one.
"Sometimes our thoughts are backed by so many insecurities, that they become lies that we learn to believe them," Doctor Briggs began. "We all have self-doubt. You don't deny it, but you also don't capitulate to it. You embrace it."
"But sometimes those insecurities can ruin something good," Maggie tossed out there. "Sometimes you think you're not good enough for the person, who's just way too incredible for you. And even though they tell you they like you, you don't believe them."
Doctor Briggs nodded in understanding. "That's true, but actions speak louder than words. The insecurities are loud, but sometimes you have to ignore them and focus on what that person is telling you and what they're doing to show you their true feelings for you." She had her gaze on Lauren who looked as though she was deep in thought. "Lauren?"
The photographer snapped out of it. "Yeah?"
"Do you think Camila loves you?" The therapist asked her client. Everyone's heads turned towards Lauren.
She nodded, 'yes.' "At this moment, there are 7,530, 818,645 people in the world. Some are running around scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just now facing the truth. Some are at war with themselves; with their inner demons. Seven billion people in the world. Seven billion souls, just going through it....and sometimes all you need is one." Maggie playfully clutched her chest at what her sister was saying. "And Camila is that one person that I need."
Clara took her daughter's hand in hers. "She's perfect for you, mija. You're perfect for each other," she took Maggie's hand in hers. "And that person you were talking about, whoever they are and whenever you're ready to introduce her to us...we'll be waiting. You deserve the best."
Maggie kinked an eyebrow. "Why do you assume it's a 'she'?"
Clara laughed and stroked her younger daughter's face. "I know you, mija. And if she's not the one, you'll find someone willing to love you the way that you deserve to be loved."
Mike felt like an outsider amongst his family. Even though he was in the room with them, he felt as though he was on the outside looking at them.
"Our session is coming to an end, but I have an assignment for you all to do as a family," Maggie sighed heavily when she heard that. "But it's not something bad. Judging from today, I can see that you all have a communication issue. From your parents not knowing about your dating life," Chelsea glanced at Maggie, "Then the fact that your parents' failed marriage affected your view on love," she gestured at Lauren, "The thing is, that you all lived in the same house, you shared the same name, physical traits, but you never truly acted as a family. You all spoke to each other, but you didn't talk."
Maybe it wasn't Mike and Clara's intention to hurt their children. Maybe they weren't even ready to settle down and have children, and maybe they weren't supposed to be together, but that's not the case anymore. They got married and they had children, whose lives they had messed up. Even if they didn't mean to.
"It is a wise father that knows his own child, William Shakespeare," Chelsea said. She flipped through her notes before addressing the family again. "Your assignment is for you to be more of a family."
Mike kinked an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"I understand that you and Clara are divorcing but you have two daughters together, that doesn't go away upon a divorce," Mr and Mrs Jauregui nodded. "I would like for you all to spend sometime together, all of you. Especially you; Mike and Maggie. Your relationship is tethering between a thin line of nonexistent and barely there to begin with. I don't need for you to come back but that's to benefit the four of you, and in the long run, benefiting Maggie and Lauren's relationship with their significant others." Doctor Briggs stood. "That's it for today. I'll like to thank all of you for coming together. And I can only hope that you all perform my assignment and try to better your relationship with one another."
Chelsea walked around shaking everyone's hands, as the Jaureguis left, Lauren remained behind to talk about her personal task.
"Right, Lauren. Our sessions are winding down thus we will have to begin our termination process," Doctor Briggs began. "But you and Camila have made such huge strides in your progress and I'm proud to say that you two are almost ready to face the married life on your own again." She informed Lauren; she would be lying if she said that she wasn't happy that these sessions were almost over. "So your next session together would be in two weeks, and I'll need for you to bring Izzy along."
"Why?"
"I assure you that it's not anything to be worried about," Chelsea said calming Lauren a bit. "But I'll like to get Izzy's take on things and to judge how she's coping with your marriage. Lastly, next week, I'll like for you and your sister, if she likes, to come in. We have an impromptu visit to somewhere and it'll help you with all the pent up feelings that you have towards your family."
"This is a lot to take in," Lauren admitted. She ran a hand through her hair. "But okay. I'll see you next week." She was about to exit her therapist office until she was called out.
"Oh and Lauren?" Chelsea called out. "Bring a change of clothes; preferably gym clothes." Lauren furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, but she went along with it. "See you next week at seven."
***
*One Week Later*
"Lauren," Doctor Briggs greeted her client. "How are you?"
The client rubbed at her eyes tiredly. "I'm pretty beat. I've been busy with work these last few days, and whenever I get home, Izzy wants me to make up for lost time," she laughed. "So even if I'm crazy tired, I still entertain her."
Chelsea smiled. "I'm glad to hear that despite your busy work schedule, you're still making time for your daughter. And how are you and Camila?"
"We're doing fine. She's been busy with some interviews, but she's making time for Izzy and myself," Lauren informed their therapist. Though it was a bit challenging, Camila was managing to balance her personal life and career. At times, she would end up focusing on one more than the other, but she was managing to make it work.
Doctor Briggs looked around but she didn't notice Maggie anywhere in sight. "Didn't your sister come with you?"
"Oh yeah, she's still in the car. She'll be here soon."
Chelsea nodded and picked up her bag off the floor. "As for you and Camila, I'm glad to know that things are working out well at home, and outside of therapy." Her driver; Angela pulled up alongside them and introduced herself.
Maggie came a few minutes later. "Yo," she greeted Chelsea and Angela. "So where are you taking my hermana?" She threw an arm over Lauren's shoulder and pulled her close. "Because you said gym clothes, and this girl here, doesn't even venture to the gym."
Lauren rolled her eyes. "I don't need to stay fit anyway, unlike you."
"Some of us likes to possess that stamina...if you know what I mean," Maggie sent her sister a wink. "No but for real, where are we off to?"
Doctor Briggs smiled and gestured to her SUV. "You'll realise once we're there."
***
*At the Gym*
"Kick, kick, twirl...and the big finale," Maggie entered the room doing a series of kicking. Her sister was standing to the side with Chelsea Briggs as they looked on at her, "Jazz hands," she finished off causing Lauren to burst out in laughter; her laugh echoing throughout the room.
"What on earth are you doing?" Lauren asked her sister, who straightened her posture.
Maggie rolled her eyes playfully. "What does it look like I'm doing?"
"Being an ass."
"And I'm pretty good at it too," the younger Jauregui teased and approached the two. "So lay it on us, psicóloga."
Chelsea ignored Maggie's antics, possibly because she wasn't in the mood to deal with a crazy person today. "Rocky once said; 'In the boxing ring of life, it's not how hard you can hit, but rather how many times you can get hit and keep moving forward," Maggie nodded because Rocky had been one of her favourite film series ever. "And today, after everything you've been through Lauren, it shows just how strong of a woman you truly are. But every strong person has a breaking point even if they don't release all the pent up anger, sadness, hurt and all those emotions that are harboring their growth."
She gestured for the two sisters to follow her, leading them to a boxing ring to the side, and a punching bag to the other side of the room.
"Repress and unexpressed anger is always a big factor in the riff between families," Chelsea said. She picked up a pair of boxing gloves and handed them to Lauren. "What we are going to do today is a form of expressive therapy. What this exercise does, is allow you to psychologically connect with this object so you can sort out all your problems," She patted the punching bag. "You are going to verbally answer a series of questions and you're going to hit this bag while Maggie is standing behind it, as your support system."
Lauren seemed a bit hesitant to perform this task. "I'm not a violent person. I don't think I can do this."
"I know you have your doubts about this, but I assure you, after this task, all your pent up frustrations will be released."
Lauren nodded slowly. She slipped on the boxing gloves and positioned herself in front of the bag. Maggie took her position behind it and held on to it. "You got this, Laur. I'm right here."
"Lauren, whatever it is that you're mad at, whatever comes to mind, this is your chance to let it all out," Doctor Briggs said. Lauren inhaled deeply through her nose, and exhaled via her mouth for a few times. "What are you angry at, Lauren? Are you angry at your father?"
Lauren stared at the boxing gloves that she had on, then at the punching bag. At the mention of her father, the image of him came in her head. She had never once seen him with Darcey; their former maid, but it was as though she could. "I'm angry at my dad for ruining my family," she said as she sent a strong punch towards the bag, causing Maggie to stumble backwards a bit. "I'm mad at him for choosing her over us. Over his own family," she threw a round of punches at the bag. Maggie caught a look at her sister's eyes. She had never once seen that kind of anger in them. Despite what had happened, Lauren still had a relationship with her father, it may not have been what it used to be when they were younger, but she couldn't find it within herself to just shut him out, the way Maggie did.
The tears began their slow journey down Lauren's cheeks as she threw punch after punch. When she had stopped, she wiped at her eyes, but it didn't do anything to help her appearance.
"Name everything that you have buried deep down, that has caused you pain," Doctor Briggs told Lauren. "This is your chance to let it all out. Use that punching bag, and knock out every bit of hurt that you have buried inside of you."
"I'm angry at my mom for staying with my dad. I'm angry at my mom for not making an effort to care for me, to care for Maggie. I'm angry at those kids I went to school with who teased me to the point of me thinking that I was worthless," Lauren began and started a series of punches. The tears began to blur her vision but it didn't make Lauren falter in her punches. The movements causing her hair to become saturated with sweat, her cheeks were tinted pink and her eyes were red with tears. "I'm...I'm mad at myself for allowing the things people did and say get to me. I am not weak!" Lauren said loudly as the final punched she delivered caused her to twitch in pain. She was sure that her hands were going to be blistered.
"You're doing fine, Laur. Let it out, let it all out," Maggie cooed into her sister's ear. "You're doing fine."
"I can see you're already so emotional. I know this is hard for you," Chelsea said looking at the emotional state her client was in. "But you have to get it all out."
Lauren shook her head 'no'. "I don't want to remember it. It...it hurts too much."
"But you remembered it all this time. Even if it wasn't the first thing to roll off your tongue, you remembered it all and it was affecting your marriage," Lauren rested her head against the punching bag, allowing her tears to flow freely. Sobs were shaking her body. Maggie moved from behind the bag and pulled her sister into her arms, rubbing soothing circles into her back.
"It's going to be okay, Laur. Everything is going to be okay. Whatever and whoever hurt you, it's all in the past. After today, when you're done here, you're not going to let this affect you, okay?" Maggie asked her sister who nodded weakly into her chest. "You're going to leave this building and you're going to be a better person, a better wife to Camila and a better mother to Izzy. Let it hurt and hurt until it can't hurt anymore."
"Tell us what you're thinking, Lauren. Say it to the punching bag," Chelsea nodded at Maggie to release her sister.
"I used to shut my door while my parents screamed in the living room," Lauren began. Her chest heaving up and down. "I would turn the music up so that Maggie wouldn't hear every little fight. I swore I would never be like them, but I was just a kid back then," she threw a weak punch at the bag.
"Go on, Lauren. It's okay," Doctor Briggs said trying to motivate her client into expressing herself a bit more.
"I used to wonder why...why they could never be happy. Was it me? Was it Maggie?" Lauren punched the bag. "I used to close my eyes and pray for a whole 'other family, you know? One that felt like mine." Everyday, Lauren would notice the changes in her parents. She would see that they no longer spent time together, that they didn't really interact or talk with one another. She would notice all these things, but never said anything to either of them. The hurt and the anger had spent all these years building up inside of her. She tried so hard to suppress them, but she couldn't anymore. She didn't know what happened, but she smashed her fist into the punching bag, sending Maggie stumbling yet again. "Because of them...because of my father's inability to love me, to love the family that he created, I didn't know it fucked me up. I didn't know it could mess up my view on love. Of how someone like Camila could love me." Lauren slammed her fist into the punching bag over and over. With each punch, she could feel the anger slowly leaving her body.
"In therapy, you talked about how hard it was when Camila had cut you out of her life after that kiss," Chelsea said. "What did you think was going to happen between the two of you? How did it make you feel?"
Lauren wiped at her face, and tried brushing back the hair that was falling in her face. "I...I thought she was going to leave me. I thought she was going to leave me," she repeated. The sadness evident in her tone. "I thought...I thought she didn't love me anymore.." her voice broke at the ending. She punched the bag weakly. "It was my fault for being so fucking stupid!" Lauren bit out harshly, increasing the power in her punches. "I shouldn't have let what happened between Camila and I go that far. I shouldn't have allowed her to feel so alone and as though I didn't love her. I shouldn't have made her feel the same way my dad made me feel."
"And how did he make you feel, Lauren?"
"Like I didn't fucking matter!" Lauren slammed her fist into the punching bag, Maggie held onto it which each strong thrust her sister sent her way. "Like...like some sort of toy that he could get rid of just because he was bored." Punch, after punch, and Lauren could feel her heart becoming lighter and lighter. "But I'm not him. I'm not my father," she finished off with one final smashing punch to the bag. "I love Camila. I love my daughter. I love my family," Lauren stepped aside and looked at her sister, "And I love you, Maggie." She pulled her sister into her arms, allowing her emotions to get the better of her. Maggie's own tears as well began to flow.
There is a danger in sealing and bottling up your emotions. The temper that comes when we cry, the hurt that we feel when someone we love wrongs us, the sadness that we feel when we lose someone or something dear to us. There is a cost in burying such pain in our bones rather than expressing it freely. It's a type of pain that brings on a loneliness to our souls. Yet with understanding and patience comes healing, and with healing comes a real and pure form of joy.
"This was a powerful experience," Chelsea said once Lauren and Maggie had pulled apart from each other. "I really appreciated the effort that you had put into this. And so should you. After our session here today, you've identified everything that had once wronged you and vented your frustrations out, you should find yourself feeling a lot lighter now."
Lauren stretched and cracked her back. "Apart from feeling extremely sore and tired..." she laughed. "I do feel a lot lighter. Like my heart," she pulled off the boxing gloves and tossed it at her sister. "Feels so much better now. Who knew punching a bag was therapeutic?"
"Everyone? Uhh..didn't everyone know this?" Maggie teased her sister.
Lauren laughed.
"That's it for today, Lauren. Today will help you a lot in your future with Camila and your relationship with your family," Chelsea shook Lauren's hand, a small smile on your face. "Enjoy the rest of your day. I'll see you and Camila at our next session."
You don't appreciate what you have until you lose it. You say routines are boring but when the rhythm changes, when that someone you love doesn't want you anymore, that's going to hurt you. You will have to live your life without them; this is going to be your new routine. It will ache your heart for the first couple of days, weeks, months, and probably years but you'll eventually get used to it.
You'll get used to them not being around anymore.
You'll move on.
Sometimes you have to accept life without your loved ones.
Meaningless? I know. You constantly yearn for that little bit of hope that they will come back to you one day, and that little bit of hope keeps you from feeling dead on the inside.
How can we live instead of just existing?
Happiness get stripped away from our hearts with just the snap of a finger. One day you're laughing with your family; your parents, siblings and the next, you're sitting in your room with tears streaming down your face, and that damned ache in your heart.
Can we live foolishly thinking that life was easy? And that everyone who claims they love you really do?
You have to work on yourself; stop counting the days and make your days count.
Truth is, everyone is going to hurt you, but you can't let that break you. It seems so impossible.
But..
Never stop trying.
***
Yes, I know some of y'all (everyone) wants smut, but it's coming. This is one of the final stages in Camren's healing process so bear with me.
Also!! If any of y'all are good with writing smut (I am a prude) please, I am begging you, message me your ideas. It has to be romantic and thrust you into yo feels.
Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter nonetheless 🦋