Months had already gone by, with all of us ladies looking after the baby and watching our Queen pull herself into solitude.
She would smile and laugh for our sakes, but Karina told us, that once she retreated into her bedroom, that smile would disappear and she would sink lower into her depression.
It wasn't healthy for her, the baby or even for Damon. The baby remained nameless because Victoria still believed that there was hope of the baby rekindling the relationship between Jade and Damon.
What I didn't understand is why she thought the baby could rekindle their relationship. Neither one of them, even wanted to be in the same room as the baby.
Jade would lock herself in her room for hours, not eating, not sleeping, if we even brought the baby into the main lounge area that we all hung out in.
She herself was deteriorating fast. She had gone into the heat twice already and Damon had looked like he wanted to knock the door down. All of his men, including Ray had left their packs behind with their Beta's in charge to make sure he didn't do anything stupid.
Karina and Tommy had left after the baby was born, with Karina coming back a few times every few weeks to check on Jade.
We all had our responsibilities, but Damon and Jade came first. They always would. We had all grown fond of Jade, after Damon found her and she was perfect Luna Queen material, but their relationship was close to shattering.
Looking at their relationship, always made me think about the things I wouldn't do once my son was born. My hand lazily drew circles on the flat plane of my stomach and I lay back onto Ray's arm as he talked to his Beta back home.
"Send the ones of age to the War Pack. Tristan will start their training before handing them down to Ben." he paused waiting for Ty to reply, "We need to start prepping for a war that we don't even know will happen."
His eyes drifted to mine, a tired smile echoing his expression and I reached up to touch his cheek gently, "Yeah that'll be good thanks. Call me if there are any changes."
"Everything alright?" I asked and he nodded in response, swiping through his phone quickly, sending a text out to someone and within seconds the door was open and the rest of the ladies and men were in our room. I shot Ray a glare and he shrugged, leaning down to kiss me.
"What's Damon up to now?" Tristan asked irritably, Kat patting his shoulder to keep him calm while sending a sympathetic smile.
"It's more what he isn't doing." Ray rolled his eyes in annoyance and I rubbed his arm softly.
I watched as the men settled down, each in their own world, pissed at one person. Damon. "When are you guys going to get that we can't do anything?" I asked
Jess and Trinity nodded in unison, "That doesn't mean that we shouldn't do anything." Kat objected, "We've seen Jade. She needs the baby. More than that, she needs Damon."
"Damon needs Jade and the baby just as much." Ray said looking pissed off at his brother. Do I blame him? No.
"It's not like we can force him to do anything though." Trinity spoke up, "Jade isn't doing much either. This whole thing is nothing like I've ever seen before."
Alx looked up with a frown, "What do you mean, it's nothing like you've seen before?"
Trinity shook her head in regret, black eyes flashing angrily, "I mean, that the only time I've ever seen a relationship like this happen, is when the male is usually physically abusive. Which makes no sense since Damon isn't abusive at all."
I exchanged a look with Ray, who gave me a strained sad smile. I got it though. We all knew that Trinity had gone through some intense stuff growing up, so finding Azrail was a saving for her. She was the last one of us ladies to be accepted into the inner circle, so we were still getting to know her, but we understood why she kept quiet from time to time.
"What's the latest on Damon?" Ray asked
Tristan stretched his arms above his head before answering, "He was watching Jade do laps of the pool."
"Like the stalker that he is." Kat smiled
"None of this healthy." I sighed, "We have to do our duty and reunite them. Some way."
I watched as the other looked at each other, shaking their heads with their shoulders slumped in defeat, "I think it needs to start with Damon." Trinity spoke up and we all looked at her in confusion, "I mean the whole reason that Jade refuses to see the baby, is because of Damon."
"So if we force Damon to connect with the baby or something, then he'll convince Jade." I clicked my fingers with a smile
"Bingo, we just saved our kingdom from falling." Tristan punched the air and Kat shook her head in exasperation
"But how do we force Damon to connect with the baby?" Ray asked
"I have an idea."
****
"Damon?" I knocked on the door quietly and peeked my head around the door
For some reason Damon had connected more with me than the other ladies. Maybe because I was basically his sister and his brother's mate, but with Damon's mood swings, I guess we'll never find out.
He looked up from his work, his forehead crinkled in concentration. It was the exact look Ray would get when he got stressed, "Yeah? Everything alright?"
By everything alright? He meant if Jade was okay. What I didn't get was, if he cared so much, why didn't he go see her, "It's the baby."
His head had looked back down, when he had saw that it was just me, but once I mentioned the baby, his head snapped up again, "Is he okay?"
"He's not sleeping, eating." I sighed and ran a hand threw my hair, "Damon he was born healthy, but he's not healthy, since he's basically been passed around so many arms, none of which are his parents."
"Cam." his tone was warning
"No. Don't Cam me." I frowned at him and ripped his pen out of his hand, "Your son is dying and you can't even see that. You refuse to see him because of your stupid pride. Don't turn out like your dad."
He rose to full height, growling down at me, "Don't compare me to my father."
I looked up at him, not moving, "Then don't act like him." I caught onto his wrist, a begging look coming over my face, "Damon please. Baby steps."
"Fine." he said and walked with me to the nursery. The men and ladies looked up in surprise when they saw Damon and Ray shot me a proud smile.
"Jess." I motioned for Jess to hand the baby over to Damon who looked at the baby in confusion
"Isn't my presence enough?" he looked doubtfully at the child, "Do I really need to hold him?"
"Don't be an idiot Damon." I rose a brow, "You're not your son's king. You're his father and fathers pick their sons up. So pick him up."
The baby had been bawling his head off for the past few days, only stopping when he managed to sleep. Which wasn't often. He had been born a happy, healthy baby, but now only red was in his face, whether it be in his eyes from the crying or on his face for crying for so long.
As soon as Jess placed the baby in Damon's arms, he stopped crying, but started blinking rapidly, looking up at Damon.
"Hey little guy." Damon said softly and the baby reached up a small hand and gurgled happily
Ray hooked an arm around my waist and placed a kiss on my cheek, "What did you say?"
"That his son was dying." I muttered
"Stretching the truth a bit, aren't we?" he grinned and I elbowed him in the stomach
"Is he okay?" Damon looked up after the baby slowly drifted off to sleep, his hand tucked tightly under his chin, black hair curling down his forehead
"He's sleeping." I smiled, "Sit here hun. At least he'll sleep longer." I pushed Damon back slowly to a rocking chair that was meant for Jade, when she had given birth to the baby, but it had collected dust. None of us wanted to sit there, so we all sat on the couches when we held the baby.
"Thanks Cam." Damon said quietly and I touched his cheek lovingly
"Don't thank me. Thank your men for caring about Jade."
"How is she?" his finger stroked the baby's cheek and I brushed the baby's curl out of his eyes
"She's not dong much better than the baby." Kat said, "We had a human doctor come in, she said that it's most likely that Jade's suffering from post-partum depression. But we know it's something more deeper than a human disorder."
"The doctor said that if she holds the baby, she might feel better." Tristan said, "Pack doctor says that Jade needs to hold the baby for sure and she needs her mate's support."
"I've been a shït mate haven't I." Damon's head rested against the chair and his grip tightened on the baby
"Shït doesn't even describe it." Ray said harshly, "You been her worst nightmare. The son-of-a-bïtch that she's fücking scared of. The substitute of her abusive father. So yeah shït mate."
"Ray." I rested a hand on his arm
"No." he snapped, "He deserves to know, what the hell she's been going through for the last few months. Not days. Months."
"What do you want me to do Ray?" Damon's eyes blazed and I slowly pried the baby from his arms before he could do anything, "Punish myself? Because last few months have been hell for me. I don't know what the hell I'm doing Ray. I'm trying not to turn out like dad, but it's like I will eventually. Because everywhere I turn, I'm told that I'm acting just like him!"
Ray shook his head and kicked a toy, "Make up to her man. Don't be like dad."
Damon stormed out and I looked at Ray, anger reflecting in my eyes, "Ray! We just got him back and now you pushed him away!"
"He's going to fix it with Jade." Ray said and he walked out the door, following Damon. The rest of the ladies and men followed him, so I handed the baby to one of the nurses and hurried after them.
Tristan led the way up to the viewing platform, that overlook the huge beach behind the palace and the swimming pool, with the hot tub outside.
It was a pretty clear nice night and we saw Jade sitting in the hot tub, like she had been for the past few months. Putting herself in a routine so that she wouldn't think of anything else.
Swim and then hot tub, swim then hot tub, swim then hot tub. Three times a day. Like she was punishing but rewarding herself.
We watched as Damon dismissed all of Jade's guards and saw her back stiffen as Damon stalked closer to her. His shirt came off and his shoes came off next before he got into the tub and sat behind Jade, making her rest against his bare front.
As soon as her skin came in contact with his, sobs wracked her petite frame and within seconds, Damon wrapped his arms around her muttering sorry over and over again.
Her fists pounded against his chest, the waters moving suddenly. He caught her wrists and looked at her wrists in anger. From far away, we could see the faint lines crossing her wrists. I inhaled sharply and the rest of looked on in shock. We knew that the post-partum was bad, we didn't know it was this bad.
"Why the heck, does this have to happen to them?" Jess asked and we all nodded in agreement.
We watched as Jade started shaking her head vigorously, before Damon grabbed her chin and spoke animatedly to her. A small smile forming on his face.
He got out of the tub and held a hand out for her, to which she took reluctantly, wrapping a towel around her and following him.
"They're going back to the baby." Ray said in surprise
"We can beat them if we hurry." Tristan started running down the stairs and within seconds we dropped into the nursery and tried to appear casual. Which was hard to do when our hearts were racing a million miles a second.
"You'll love him." Damon was saying as they both entered the room
Jade looked at us accusingly and I smiled at her, picking the baby up and handing him to Damon. He passed the baby to Jade, who naturally cradled the child a look of wonder coming over her face.
The baby woke up his little hands reaching up and Jade lowered her head, so that the baby could touch her face. "Mama's here baby." she murmured, "I'm sorry baby."
"We're all here." Damon said and stared at the baby, who looked at both of them, his grey eyes shining brightly.
"Cam." Jade held the baby out to me and I looked in confusion at the baby, "Take him, so that I can murder Damon."
I took the baby quickly and placed him in his crib, praying that he didn't start crying. He probably wouldn't, since he could sense both his parents in the room and within seconds, he had dozed off again.
"Murder is a strong word." Damon winced as Jade slapped him. Hard. The men winced, their heads moving to the sides and eyes squinting.
"You are the reason that I wasn't with my baby." she accused and she was right. Hell she could have made the choice to come and see the baby, but she was so afraid that she would loose Damon even more and the depression was just pulling her lower.
"You made all of us suffer." another slap, "The men and ladies. They have lives, but they had to stay and look after our sorry ässes because you were so proud."
"I was dying!" tears rolled down her cheeks, "Because I needed my baby and my mate to support me. None of which were there."
"I hated you for the first few weeks. Because you never showed." she pressed her lips together, to try to stop the tears, "But then I just accepted that you would never come. That's when this started happening again." she pointed at her wrists, that were indeed cut
"But you weren't there to save me that day." she punched his chest, "Trin and Kat did. They were the ones who pulled me out of that bath and put me back together. Cam was the one who acted like the mother of my child. Jess was the one who put me to sleep at night, because I had nightmares of loosing my family."
I looked in surprise to Kat and Trin, when she said that they had saved her, they had never said anything and Kat shook her head when I rose a brow at her. They were protecting Jade. I got it though. It was like how I tried to protect the baby, but it didn't work.
"You know what was worse?" she asked, "I didn't know who my family was. Everybody I had called family, turned on me. So I cut."
"We should leave." Tristan mouthed and I shook my head. The ladies were staying whether they liked it or not. The Luna Queen needed us. The ladies nodded in agreement and the men pursed their lips, but remained.
"You know who else was there for me, when you should have been there?" Jade stepped back to look at Damon, "Your men. Who aren't supposed to do anything with me. But they were there nights upon nights, making sure I was okay."
"But you know what was the worst?" her hand covered her mouth and her other hand clutched her stomach as she leaned over, "When you left me, after seven hours of painful labour. Labour that almost led to death. You just left!" she screamed and the baby started bawling. Realising her mistake, Jade quickly ran over to the crib to pick the baby up and clutch him to her chest and turned around to face Damon again, "You didn't just leave me. You left him too."
"And because you left him. I left him too." she stroked the back of the baby's head, "It was the time that I needed you the most and he needed both of us. Don't you remember what I said."
She looked down at the baby and kissed the top of his head tenderly, "I said that I wanted this baby to grow up in a house that loves him. I said that I didn't care if we were good with each other, I just didn't want my baby to go through what I went through. I said that I didn't care if our love was real or fake. I just wanted us to love this baby over us and everything that we go through."
"Jade I can't do that." Damon finally spoke after listening to Jade scream at him for so long. I was surprised that he had even managed to stay patient for so long, "I love you so goddamn much, that it hurt me when you basically died, trying to give birth to that child. It would have killed me had you died."
Jade looked at Damon differently now, like he actually had a human heart, "You should have been there for me and the baby."
"I know." he said, "That was my mistake and I'm sorry. I'll try and make it up to you. Just let me in."
"Good. That's good enough for me." she smiled and reached up to give him a kiss, both of them hugging the baby gently, "Я люблю тебя тоже моя любовь."
"Speaking of making up." Jess started, "The baby still needs a name."
"Andros Dasha Ryan." Jade said immediately and everyone looked at her in surprise
"That was fast."
"Russian names." Damon mused, "Andros means brave and Dasha means gift sent from God."
"Why do you want to call him that?" Jess asked curiously
"Andros was my mother's father's father's name. He meant everything to me until he died. It makes sense too. Andros was so brave the time that Damon and I basically rejected him." Jade shook her head, "And Dasha. He is a gift sent from God."
"Andros Dasha Ryan." Ray sounded out, "Okay not to seem rude or anything, but where the fück is my name?"
We laughed and Jade grinned widely at him, opening her arm to give him a side hug.
"So that now you guys are good, do you still want to do the wedding?" I asked and Jade looked at Damon who nodded
"I guess it's time that I become Mrs Ryan." she laughed, "God that makes me sound so old."