Stumbling through the school day, not even the last bell was able to pull me out of the dreary reverie. I shuffled my way outside, shielding my eyes from the sun. I felt Jenny loop her arm through mine and throw an abundance of questions my way. I answered them one by one, but I had no idea what I was agreeing to. My need to see, touch and speak with John was overwhelming as we made our way to the gates. I searched the entrance and felt my heart constrict with disappointment. He's just late. I reassured myself and went down the steps, Jenny pulling me towards the boys.
"Cam!" I heard Jenny squeal as she released me and dove into Cameron's awaiting arms. I smiled at the couple and greeted a smug looking Michael.
"Every day." He murmured, kicking an invisible rock. I was about to give a rebuttal to his enthusiastic comment, but my phone rang. I pulled it out of my pocket and looked the screen- Unknown. I scowled at the name, or lack thereof, and pressed the green answer key.
"Hello." I said and strained my right ear in attempts to commit the voice to memory.
"Sophie," The same male voice from before greeted me and I still couldn't place who he was, "How are you?"
"Who is this?" I asked, moving a few steps away from my best friends.
"That you will find out soon enough, but in the meantime-" The man stopped talking and my heart thumped with expectation. "Please pass on my regards to Jonathan, he's really grown hasn't he? I know how fond you are of him-" It felt as though my stomach was on fire and I gripped the phone tighter. "-Ah and of course please wish all the best to Mister and Misses Gram."
Deep within the underbelly of my brain, something snapped. A rift between my soul and body emerged. It was as though I was a stranger looking in at the scene. My mouth of moving and it was my voice speaking, but it wasn't me.
"When we find you- and I know we will- I promise you, you will be regretting the day you ever thought of my family and Jonathan. If you don't stop with these little games and give yourself in it will be a lot worse for you in the long run! If you are half the man you think you are-" An ear piercing cackle erupted on the other side of the line.
"You know what, I like you." The man mumbled, the humor in his voice was evaporating. "But it will do you well to remember who you're speaking to." His voice was dark and the laughter was now long gone.
"If I wasn't having so much fun, it would've been you and your little boyfriend rolling around in a dirt ditch by now." He chuckled as though it was a private joke. "Enjoy your day Sophie, see you tomorrow." The dial tone rang in my ears.
I brought the phone away from my ear and tried to put it back into my pocket. My hands were shaking with a mix of rage and fear. I swallowed the knot in my throat and curled my fingers into fists. His words, like angry bee stings, throbbed in my mind. If it wasn't for the hand on my shoulder, I would've continued to stand like a statue, rooted to the ground.
"Someone's late!" Jenny ooh'ed as though John was in trouble. She squeezed my shoulder and her smile fell. "What's wrong?"
"What?" I asked, trying my best to smile. "Nothing's wrong." I watched as Jenny was about to object, but Cameron swooped in and draped an arm over her shoulder as well as mine.
"Coming with us today Sophs?" He grinned, his dark hair flopping over his eyes.
"No it's okay," I smiled, "John will be here soon."
"Are you sure?" Jenny asked, her face a mask of concern.
"Positive." I tried to smile again, it must've worked. I watched the couple and a grumbling Michael retreat as they made their way to the car. Letting out a deep breath, I noticed that majority of the kids had already dispersed, leaving me alone with a group of Mustang enthusiasts, a couple dressed in all black and single girl waiting at the curb.
I saw him before the blue and white police car had made the turn on Blanker St. Jenny sighed with faux relief and fanned herself as though she'd been holding her breath. She came back and pulled me into a bone crushing hug and told me to go. Cam and Michael smiled and I didn't look back to see them wave. My body was light and cut through the air like a sharp blade. The car stopped just a few feet away and I watched as the door swung open. He was still dressed in his uniform, looking handsome as ever. The distance between us was less then my own height, but it felt like days before I was able to wrap my arms around his broad shoulders and press my face into his neck. Standing on my tiptoes, I tried to maintain my tears and succeeded.
If I wasn't to occupied with the worry of crying on John, I would've noticed his stiff posture. I would've felt the cold air radiating off of him. But I didn't, instead I relished the feeling as he finally wrapped his arms around my lower back and dipped his head down onto mine. Pulling me closer to him, I listened to Johns shallow breathing and pulled away. His eyes were dark, the vibrant blue eyes were now almost the same dark blue color as his uniform. The small smile on his face was a mask, which was cracking on the sides, the scowl beneath was beginning to become evident. The arms around my waist were not soft, instead it felt as though I was trapped.
I looked into his worn eyes and laid a hand onto his cheek. His eyes flicked to mine and the mask on his face crumbled . I watched as the frown now became evident and the worry in his eyes prominent.
"What's wrong?" I asked leaning in, but he didn't reply with words.
His lips, usually soft and caressing, we're hard and demanding. Snaking his hand onto my neck, he pressed me closer to himself. Allowing myself to submit to the forceful kiss, I pressed my hands to his chest, minimizing the space between us. My brain spun with lack of oxygen, but I couldn't bring myself to pull away first. I needed Jonathan, I needed to feel his smooth skin, to smell the delicious body wash emitting from him, to see his beautiful face, to hear his deep soothing voice and taste all that was Jonathan Foster. Oblivious to time, the kiss lasted an eternity.
My lungs had shriveled up long before John had pulled away. Together we sounded like a chorus of panting dogs after a long run. Leaning his forehead down to mine, his warm breath tickled my nose. I closed my eyes for a brief second and opened them again, taking in as much of John as I could.
"Tell me." I mumbled, but he shook his head and hugged me instead. Knowing he would tell me when ready, I wrapped my arms around his neck and enjoyed the warmth of his body close to mine.
"I'm sorry I'm late." He whispered into my ear, goose bumps crawled up my spine.
"It's okay." I said and pulled away from him. I laced my fingers with his and squeezed his hand. "How's work going?"
As soon as the question exited my lips his face darkened. He pursed his lips and led me to the car. Opening the passenger door for me, I slipped in and felt a sense of déjà vu. The interior was the same, worn leather that smelled of vomit and sweat. John sat down a second later and closed the door, we sat in silence for a few seconds before he started up the cruiser. The car grumbled to life with a dying man's cough and rolled down the street.
"Are you still planning on attending tomorrow, Sophie?" John asked looking straight ahead.
"Yes." I said and noticed how his knuckles turned white from clutching the steering wheel. "Can you come with me?" I knew it was silly question to ask, but I couldn't get my mind from replaying the unknown man's words. As though I had just slapped him, John turned towards me and looked me in the eyes.
"Of course. You shouldn't ever have to ask me that." John said with a sigh. He dropped his right hand from the steering wheel and grabbed mine. "I will always be there for you, you know that."
I looked away, directing my gaze out the window. Tears began to prick at my eyes once again and I knew this time I wouldn't be able to hold him back. I know how fond you are of him- see you tomorrow- all the best to Mister and Misses Gram. His words echoed in my head, forcing me to squeeze my eyes shut. Opening them after a second allowed me see to a world where everything was blurry and smudged. The warm tears flowed down my cheeks and splattered like rain droplets against my bare legs. I felt the car slow down and then come to a complete stop.
"Sophie, look at me." Johns voice was soft and low, as though he was comforting a child. Taking a deep breath, I wiped the tears away the back of my hand and looked up.
Johns gaze was steady, never leaving my bleary ones. With a gentle hand, he wiped away the last stray tear. A genuine smile graced his lips as cupped my cheek.
"Are you afraid for tomorrow?" He asked.
"Not if you're there." I smiled and felt my heart rate increase as his smile grew.
"Then tell me what's wrong."
"Will you tell me what's wrong?" I asked and his smile fell a notch.
"It's nothing to worry yourself about right now."
"Does it worry you?" I asked leaning in.
"Yes." He said after a few seconds of silence.
"If it matters to you then please tell me." I whispered, leaning my forehead onto his shoulder. I listened to Johns heart and knew he was having an internal conflict.
"This morning an anonymous tip was called in." John said and I felt myself shiver at the word anonymous. John placed an arm around my shoulders and pulled me in closer thinking I was cold.
"Out in Farewell Park we found a ditch." Johns voice was dark and brooding. He looked at me, gauging my reaction. "We found two bodies in the makeshift grave."
"That's terrible," I said, "I don't mean to sound offensive or impolite to the deceased, but why does that bother you?" I asked. Police officers see violence on a daily basis, why should this be any different?
"Because," He gritted his teeth. "They weren't supposed to die." I scowled at his choice of words and straightened up so I could get a full view of him.
"What do you mean?" I asked searching his face.
"He killed a couple of young teenagers to make a point, that's what I mean!" John yelled, his face contorting with anger. "Two innocent teens died because a monster wants to play a game!" I flinched back from the sudden sound and felt my heart race at a certain string of words. It would've been you and your little boyfriend rolling around in a dirt ditch by now. It was him. I thought to myself. He told me! I felt something rise up from my stomach and into my throat.
"Who told you?" I heard John ask, but I focused on breathing instead. I took deep long breaths until the nauseous feeling subsided. I felt the car door open and I was pulled outside. John trapped my face between his hands, forcing me to look at him.
"Are you okay?" He asked searching my face.
"I'm fine." I dismissed his worry and shook my head out of his grasp. "How do you know it was him?"
"The couple," John looked down, his voice filled with an unknown emotion, "They were dressed in the same clothes as us."