I had put on a cute little spaghetti strap crop top with the phrase 'Carpe Diem' written by the boobie area and some black skinny jeans. My hair is down and naturally curly and I have red painted lips and I'm ready. Ready for whatever this is.
About ten minutes passes after the agreed meeting time but I am not at all worried. Sometimes boys are late. It's fine. Maybe he just got caught up in the house. It's not issue. I sit down on the floor (because we don't have a couch) and wait for him. I grab my phone from my back pocket and check the time. Half past six. I try not to worry about where he is but I have to a little. He literally lives next to me so I don't know what's taking too long. I begin to panic a little. I tap my foot slightly as I wait and I wait and I, you guessed it, wait some more. Half six turns into half seven which turns into half eight and when my phone informs me into half nine, I give up. Why would he do that? Why would he stand me up like this? What is going on? I walk to my mattress and grab a makeup wipe. I wipe the red from my lips and the eyeliner and my foundation. I feel fucking idiotic. I change into my pyjamas and curl up into a ball. I need my mom right now. Mom went to see a friend in America a few days ago and won't be back for a week. It's always when you need someone when they are not here. It is in this moment that I realise, maybe people like me don't deserve love.