Chapter 4: I'll Hold You Down
{Chris}
I had some problems back home (so I heated up)
I ain't with that bullshit at all (then I laid it down)
Maybe it's that Virginia in me (nigga say something)
Have a young nigga go so hard
Oh but through it all you stuck with me
Through it all you never ducked off like a coward when he hit me
Get me? Girl I swear to God you the real one and you know it
And I don't hurt anyone of ya'll for the real one and you know it
And I hold it down
[Hold You Down: DJ Khaled ft. Various Artist]
Breakfast was eaten in silence. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of them eating as their utensils scraped along their plates. Chris didn't mind the silence and didn't want to hear Kae's voice after she called his heart out of her name especially when she didn't know shit about her. Bet your wondering why he called the one that got away his heart when all he did was break her down and fuck her over time and time again. Well it's simple. She's the only one who has ever had and still has his heart wholeheartedly and since she's been gone there's been a void there but he couldn't complain. He brought it on himself. She did no wrong. Wait a minute he lied she did. She enabled him even if she didn't know it. She gave him way too many chances to walk over her instead of putting her feet down from jump. What did Chris do? He continued to walk right over her. She made it too easy but it was Chris who didn't know that she was desperately fighting to win his love back. Something that she never lost but he never cared to show her that he was still down for her and in love with her.
His baby girl Royalty was the straw that broke the camel's back. He had a whole baby on her. His blood running through her veins while April's blood was nowhere in the formula or DNA sequence. She tried to stick around and act like the whole ordeal didn't fuck her up but it did. It crushed her. He knew it did especially after they had their pregnancy scare. April wanted a baby so bad and at the time he didn't so while she was excited he just couldn't fathom it nor did he think they needed a baby at the moment but when his daughter's mother popped up pregnant and he heard his baby's heart beating like a little warrior he was already in love with her. Mind you he didn't even know if baby girl was even his until he had actually taken a DNA test. To this day he still didn't know what happened with April's pregnancy scare. He didn't know if she was pregnant, miscarried, or if it was a false alarm. At the time he didn't want to hear shit about it so he left the subject alone and ignored it and her leaving her to deal with whatever the outcome was by herself. So he knew once his baby girl came into the picture it killed his heart no matter how strong she tried to be.
Throughout it all that girl held him down through all of his wrongdoings. Well that woman. When the world put a target on his back she was there along for the ride holding shit down even when people were calling her all types of names for staying with a nigga like Chris; A nigga that did nothing but disrespect her and dog her out. He fucked up and now he could finally admit it. He let the best thing in his life besides his daughter walk away without a fight. He honestly didn't want to fight for her because he knew she needed someone who could truly love her and treat her better than he had ever. They say if you love someone you should let them go and that's what he did. He wanted better for her. She deserved better. Would he like to shoot his shot again? He damn sure would but he wouldn't unless he absolutely had his shit together and right now he didn't. Chris didn't like being alone and although Kae was around and he enjoyed her company they both knew what it was at the end of the day. He couldn't fully commit to her when his heart belonged to someone else. Before you comment she knows this already. Besides she's just looking for publicity so it's a win, win for the both of them until shit goes left. According to Chris he's out before it even goes that way. But what happens if it's too late.
His phones continued to chime and ding throughout the day with people talking shit bout his heart like he wasn't the nigga that fucked up. He knew he had to put a stop to it. He knew people would say shit just like he knew Kae would be in her feelings but he had to do what was right. It's the least he could do for April. Unlocking his phone and opening up his notes he starred at the blank screen trying to get his thoughts together so he could get his message across clearly without somebody taking it the wrong way. Chris ran his hand over his face not knowing where to begin. He'd just have to follow his heart this time. His heart wasn't an attention seeker so he knew she was in her feelings so if he could do anything to relieve some stress and toss the attention elsewhere then he had to do what he had to do. Chris took a deep breath and let his fingers slide and glide across the screen pouring out his thoughts. By the time he was done he had typed out what he felt like was a damn 4 page letter. He didn't bother to proofread he just typed what came from the heart and posted it without giving it a second thought. He did the right thing and that was all that mattered.
Damned if you do damned if you don't! She was out enjoying a night out on the town with her girls and the only thing y'all could say was she's trying to stir shit up. So what IF I was on her mind. Have y'all forgotten that I was the one who fucked up? I fucked up! So IF she's in her feelings she has every right to be. There's no time limit on how you should feel bout someone even if it was decades ago or last month. Sometimes you feel the hurt unexpectedly. You have good days and bad days. None of you know why she murdered the song the way she did. Y'all were so busy saying she was looking for attention but no one said that she just fuckin BODIED, MASSACARED, and MURDERED the song. She fuckin killed it didn't miss a note or anything. She did a great fuckin job.
I always told her she deserved to be on someone's record label but she was never bout that life to her it was only room for one entertainer in her life and that was ME. She was never an attention seeker and she honestly didn't like being on the blogs and on social media but she endured it because of ME. She knew that being with me came along the good bad and ugly side of media but she didn't care she accepted me and all of my baggage. We haven't been together or seen each other in 2 plus years and when she could've went to seek some attention and go tell the world bout our relationship in interviews and on shows or radio stations she never once went against the grain but yet y'all out here trying to go in on her. She's loyal as the day I met her even after all my bullshit. So I'm a need y'all to get off her back either let her know she killed it at karaoke or leave her be.
Some of y'all do way too much. Let me remind y'all that she was somebody before me, during me, and after me. Baby got her own dough and never needed or wanted anything from me but for me just to love her. She's been in Forbes and in tech magazines and many other major magazines for her own accomplishments but y'all don't care about that. Baby been part of the billionaire boys club LITERALLY I had no help in that she was already there before me. So if you fuck with her you fuck with me. I'm a need y'all to show her some respect because she earned it and deserves it. I'm always gonna have her back so I ask you please don't fuck with her if you don't want to fuck with me. That's all!
#shebeenloyalsinceday1 #shebodiedit #aintnothingbutlove #alwaysbeenROD #fuckwithheryoufuckwithme #iwishyouwould #alwaysgonnaholdherdown #whobouttotryandsignhertho #checkmate
Chris got up from the table and put his dishes in the dish washer and left out the kitchen leaving Kae behind. He knew once everybody saw his post his phones would be going off all day but he didn't mind it. This time he knew he did the right thing. He smiled as he made his way back into his bedroom and headed straight to the bathroom to start the rest of his day. Today he had a day off and since Kae would be in her feelings about his post he wasn't trying to be around her today so he was gonna go and pick his baby girl and spend some time with her. Standing in the shower letting the water pounce on his body thoughts of his heart crossed his mind. He missed her smile. He missed her laugh. He missed the way she smelled and the way she cuddled under him burying her face in the crook of his neck. Chris missed everything about her. If he was being honest with himself he missed the hell out of his heart, April.
"Chris what the fuck was that post bout" Kae came barging inside the bathroom like she owned the shit. He just rolled my eyes. He thought he'd be gone before she got up in her feelings.
Wiping his hands over his face and taking a deep breath Chris sighed. "Kae it ain't that serious. I was looking out for a friend". He turned off the shower and stepped out grabbing his towel off the bathroom counter and slipped in around his waist.
"Friend my ass that's your ex you should've just kept your mouth shut. That shit ain't have shit to do with you" she rolled her eyes following him out of the bathroom while he searched his drawers for some boxers and a wife beater.
"I don't have to explain my reasons for doing shit" he slipped into his boxers, beater, and sat down at the foot of the bed and put some cocoa butter on.
"Chris did you think bout how you're bout to have me out here looking. I know I'm not the only one who thinking you still got a soft spot for the damn girl" she stood in front of Chris looking like he just said fuck her or said some bullshit about her.
"It ain't that serious. It ain't like I said I love her and wanted to be with her. All I was doing is telling people to get off her back" he stood up and walked inside of his walk-in closet with Kae ass right behind him following him like a lost puppy. Chris hated when she did that shit and she knew it.
"You got me out here looking stupid. I'm not bout to be out here looking like that weak ass bitch" she glared at him and struck a nerve. She needed to leave and she needed to leave now. He couldn't have another case on his hands for a bitch being stupid.
"Karruche you got to go" he faced her trying to hold his composure. She was really asking for one of his sisters to come fuck her up and on sight every time they saw her. Hazel and Alaina had been itching to whoop her ass but on the strength of him they tolerated her bullshit. He knew if he'd a called and told them what was going down they'd be here in a heartbeat.
"I ain't got to do shit" she poked his chest with her fake ass claw nails.
"You doing too much. I'm not gonna tell you again. It's either you leave or I'll have security to escort you out" Chris walked pass her with his outfit in my hands. She wasn't gonna make him step out of character. He hadn't had an accident since Rihanna and didn't plan on going back so he needed her ass to go.
"I'm not doing shit Chris" she spat. What the fuck did he get himself into? There was no way he was gonna let her keep talking about his heart like she knew her ass. She didn't know about their situation. She didn't know shit but what she did know was that Chris wasn't gonna let her disrespect her ass. Chris counted to 10 in his head like his therapist told him to do when he felt himself about to blow up. He looked at her as he slipped into a pair of Black Pyramid joggers and a fresh white tee and went straight to his bedroom intercom to call security because he could see this shit going all types of wrong.
"Aye Henny I'm a need you to come and escort of Ms. Tran out immediately. She's upstairs in the master bedroom" he spoke into the intercom and kept his eyes on her to let her know he wasn't playing any games. She huffed and smacked her teeth as she gathered her belongings and slipped into the shit she wore yesterday. That's what the fuck he thought. He put on his Patek, slipped his wallet in his pocket, and grabbed both his business and personal phones walking out the bedroom door with Kae following right behind him not saying a word. By the time Chris reached the last step Henny was about to walk right up but there was no need he stood beside Chris waiting for Kae to get to the bottom of the steps.
"Everything good Boss" Henny asked as he looked at Chris. He had been around him for years and knew when he was in a mood.
"Yea I'm straight I just need her gone" he replied looking down at Kae as she stood there frowning.
"Got it" Henny replied as he escorted Kae out the front door with Chris behind them locking up the house and putting on the alarm. Kae stood beside his orange Lamborghini pressing the button to unlock it.
"Nah bruh pass me those. You better call an Uber" he snatched his keys from her and walked over to the driver side and opened the door.
"Really Chris" she pouted still acting like a little ass kid.
"Really" Chris straight faced her. "Henny call her and Uber and make sure she don't fuck my shit up" he hopped inside the car and closed the door already knowing he had nothing to worry about because Henny was going to get the job done. Maybe he needed to be by his damn self for a while and get his shit together.
How y'all feeling chapter 4?
What about Chris and his post? Should he have said anything or left it alone?🤔
Kae?