BEYONCE GISELLE KNOWLES
12pm
" Okay Bey we got sum'ting. " I heard from the door of my living room. I was sitting in my couch, with Onika in front of me.
That was basically how we spent our last two weeks, both irritated by the fact of the incapacity of the Gang we hired. They were so slow, so so slow, that even I would sure do better. If it wasn't for Onika who told me to not dive into this dangerous mess, I would have found my husband myself, and killed that bitch, myself.
" What, Ty' ? " I bluntly said.
Normally I would have been happy to the news, but it was like that for two weeks. They thought they found something important, but ended up realizing that it was only a small detail.
Tyler jogged a little and took a seat next to me, handling me his laptop. He was the geek one. " I found the location. "
" Show me. " I said, a little more interested.
Onika stood up and plopped herself next to me, laying her head on my shoulder. She has been the help I needed during this hard time, she has been nothing but patient, tolerant, and extremely understanding. It seems so egoistic to say that out loud but this whole Shawn situation made me realize how much I liked Nicki. And I knew that after we find Shawn, I would be with her. In the public's eyes, I don't care anymore. Her agreeable scent, her contagious laugh, her gorgeous body.. I could never have enough of it.
" They are at 42 West Side Street. They moved there today, it must be a more appropriate place for the girl to have him how she likes. " Tyler said adjusting his glasses.
I smirked. " Well tell the crew to get ready. "
" Bey. " Nicki called. I looked over at her and she had a worried expression. " You're not going, right ? "
I sighed. " I have to. "
" No you don't. "
I frowned. " What do you mean I don't, honey ? "
" I don't want you to go there. " She crossed her arms.
I chuckled slightly but stopped once I realized that she had a serious face. " Why is that, love ? "
" It's too dangerous. "
I smiled. " We got weapons and the best shooters, if it pleases you I can stay in the car. "
" No. "
I sighed. " Come on, Onika. It's not dangerous. At least, not for me. "
" But for me yes Beyoncé ! " She cracked up, irritation in her voice. " I don't want you to go I'm afraid ! I'm afraid that once you see him you don't think about me anymore. I'm afraid that once you'll kiss him, you'll want to make love to him again. I'm afraid of you choosing him over me, I'm afraid of losing you. "
I blinked, taken back by her suddenness. I was shocked, but mostly hurt. How could she, after two weeks of us living under the same roof, sharing the same secrets, eating the same food, and mostly sharing the same bed, doubt of my love for her ? I made her understand a thousand time that she was the one I needed, I made sure she was comfortable at the idea of coming out with me, I made sure she felt loved and cherished. All that for what ?
" Ty, leave us alone one sec. " I dryly said as I felt the couch resume it form. " And you better not tell my business to anyone or you're dead. "
" Yes ma'am. "
Once he got out of the room, leaving my lover and me all alone. You could feel the tension between us, and it was nothing positive. I roughly grabbed her neck and brung her into me, making her moan. I kissed her with rage but ended up adding passion in it. I forced my tongue in her mouth and licked the inside of her mouth, her perfect mouth that made me wish to never unstuck mine over it. After two delightful minutes, we pulled out begging for air. I was breathing loud, my hand still wrapped around her neck.
" Never, ever say that again Onika Tanya Maraj. I love you, I want to be with you ! I thought you'd understand that with the past two weeks but it looks like you didn't. You're all I want, and you'll ever be. It's just like that, I just can't get enough of you, I want more, I need more. Please understand that I need to see Jay, first to make sure he's okay, and second to tell him how I feel. I'm still married to him, I still have the ring and the last name that goes with it, I'm still the mother of his children. But soon or later, in any case, things will change and you'll be the one walking around with a ring and my last name. Now I never want to hear you saying that again, ya heard me Onika ? " I asked, adding a pressure on my hand.
She moaned lowly and nodded, incapable of talking. I finally let her neck go and watched her taking a big and long breath. " Shit. I'm horny now thanks to you. "
I smirked. " I'll take care of you when I'll come back. "
" Mhm. " She whined and leaned on to kiss me. " Don't be too long then. "
I smirked " I won't. You sure you understood what I just said ? "
" I did. "
I nodded. " Good girl. "
2pm
I watched as the gang went in the warehouse to get Shawn out of this situation, leaving me alone in the car. Well I wasn't that alone, there were Julius, and my thoughts. I thought about Shawn, about his state of mind now, if he was good, but mostly about how he would feel when I'll tell him about me and Onika.
Imagine telling to your husband you felt for 10 years that you felt in love with a woman, and want to have something serious with her. Imagine telling to your other half that you didn't feel complete with him, that you found yourself another half.. Imagine telling to the father of your children that you see your futur with someone else, after swearing twice that only death could separate you, that you are ready to die with someone else. It would be hard, I didn't doubt it a second. But I was ready, I was ready to finally make the world see who I truly am, I was ready to not lie to myself anymore and to live my life as I liked it.
" They're coming miss. " I heard the deep voice of Julius coming through the partition.
I snapped my head at the window and saw Shawn escorted by the Gang members. I felt relieved, and extremely happy. I cheesed hard and jumped on him when he got in the car. I held him tight, as if it was going to be the last time that we'll see each other. It technically was going to be, but never mind.
" Thank you thank you thank you ! " I said to Tyler and his Gang. " Thank you so much for bringing him back alive and conscious. I owe you something. "
Tyler smiled. " You owe us nothing, your happiness is our priority B. Now we have to go before the cops show up. "
" Were there any harm ? " I asked, frowning.
He shook his head. " No but we had to shoot in the air for them to be scared. There were only girls though, so we didn't do nothing. "
" Only girls ?! " I exclaimed in shock.
He nodded. " Only girls. It must be a sorority typa thing, Ion know. Bye B. "
" Bye Ty', thanks again. "
He nodded. " Take care. "
I nodded and looked back at Shawn who was smiling hard, rubbing my back slowly with the palm of his hands. Once upon a time, it would have given me all types of corny signs, but now I only feel great.
" I missed you. " I said, looking right into his eyes.
He looked at me and smiled. " I missed you too. "
" What did she do to you ?! I want to know. "
He sighed. " Look, we'll talk about it in a more comfortable setting. Ion wanna talk 'bout it now. "
He said and turned his head to face the window. He was clearly pissed, I could tell by his clenched jaw and the way his accent slipped out of his mouth. I put hand on his and slowly rubbed it. It wasn't the moment at all to tell him about Onika and me, not with him in this state. I sighed and put my head on his shoulder. I didn't want to hurt him more than he already was, but I just couldn't go on and pretend like I loved him. It wasn't fair, he deserved to know the truth, he didn't deserve to be played, I would never do a double game with him and Onika.
" Jay ? "
He snapped his head at me. " Yeah B ? "
I sighed. " I also have something important to tell you. "
" Well, I'm hungry so let's go grab something and talk there. "
I nodded and watched him talk to Julius. Soon, we headed to Red Lobster. A lot of Paparazzi were ready to snap pictures of us, but we were having none of that. My habitual smile was replaced by a straight face as I realized what I was going to do. Every steps counted at this time.
We got installed in thé quietest place, with no one around, and we took our order. We were now waiting in an agreeable silence until I felt his hand on my left hand.
" Where's your ring B? " he asked.
I looked at my hand and saw that I effectively didn't wear the ring today. I sighed and took his hand in mine. " That's what I wanted to talk about.. Can I go first ? So I won't feel bad and change my already made mind ? "
" Yeah .. Sure. Go on, I'm listening. Who's the lucky man ? " He asked, sipping in his wine.
I sighed. " It's not a man. "
" Oh wow. " He said, leaning his chin on the palm of his hands. " A girl ? She must be special. "
I chuckled. " She is. It's Onika. " I got out.
I slowly lifted my head to catch his reaction and was met with a straight face. He stayed like that, for a good five minutes, leaving me and my thoughts in a battle. His straight face left nothing to see, I simply couldn't read him. I had no idea if he took it right, or wrong, I had no idea if he wanted to kiss, hug, or kill me. I was lost in his dark eyes.
" Ya sure ? " He finally spoke.
I looked back down at my fingers. " Y-yea. I-I don't know, I just feel so good around her, and those past weeks without you around just deepened the thing. " I confessed then chuckled. " Damn, it's so weird to talk about this with you. "
" Mhm. " I looked up and saw him smiling. " I'm pissed, like, pissed. But it's your choice, though. I can't force you to love me, whatever you decide I'll be okay with it. "
I smiled back. " God. I don't deserve you, you're so perfect. I don't know how the hell I lost them feelings, you were treating me like a Queen. "
" Because you are one. " He smiled. " I want your happiness, and if it means to sacrifice myself, I'll sure do it. " He added. " But , are you going to make it official ? "
I sighed. " I want to. But I don't know how my fans, and people will react. I've been undercover for almost a year and my come back will be me being in love with someone else, a girl, to be precise. "
" You don't have to tell them, sing it. " He said.
I smiled. " You're right, I'll think about it. "
" So, we're going to divorce ? " He asked, looking down.
I sighed and grabbed his chin. " It seems like we are. But Jay I'll always be there for you you know that ? I'll always stand up for you and support you for he simple fact that I've been in love with you for 10 years. Not 10 seconds, not 10 mins, not 10 hours, days or months but 10 years. It ain't none.. I will still have love for you, but not much to stay with you. I felt like I had to be honest, and to not play with y'all feelings, and this is how I feel. "
He smiled. " Bey I'm glad you found happiness. I'll always be here for you too, don't forget. You're still the mother of my three children. I'll still love you forever. "
I smiled and hugged him. I felt like a different woman..
I felt relieved and free.
<•>•<•>
I'm back ! I'm feeling better, I had depression according to my psy, but it's all good now.
Sometimes I just want to be hit by a train but yeah, it's all good now. I hope.
Y'all enjoyed?
BeyNika is finally fully happening guys..
Any predictions?