Betrayal.
The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from our enemies. Well, we don't place any sort of trust in our enemies to begin with, but the betrayal from your loved ones; friends, family, significant others, now that's where it hurts.
It has the power to destroy you.
The same way it slowly destroyed Camila's take on love and relationships.
Your dad isn't supposed to be the first man or the first person to break your heart. A father is a standard against which your daughters would judge the persons who want to love her, and a figure in which their sons should follow in their footsteps.
Cheating is a choice not a mistake.
You can be so completely in love with someone, treat them right, give them all that you have, but if they want to cheat, they will. And the sad truth is that, it's not even your fault. The relationship can be perfect but at some point your partner would become unsatisfied and wouldn't want you anymore.
How can you just leave someone's life? How is it so easy for the person who claimed they 'love' you to just walk away? What do they do with all the memories of the both of you laughing and talking at 3 A.M, under the night's sky looking up at the stars?
How can someone go from protecting you from the monsters under your bed, to filling your eyes with tears with the thought of them?
How could he have just left like that? Did he never care at all?
Camila often contemplated whether her father had loved her or not. Maybe, just maybe at one point he did, but to leave her and to completely shattered her heart, it made her believe that he didn't.
You don't hurt the ones you love.
Right?
How can you sleep at night? I want to know how you can sleep at night knowing that you destroyed someone's take on love. How can you look at her, and tell her that you love her when your lips are touching another. Do your lies sit at the tip of your tongue, so that whenever she asked you where you were; rather than saying you were with another, you claim you were just preoccupied with a case?
I want to know how you can cheat on her every single day and not feel any sort of remorse.
How can you drag your daughter into this? How can you live with yourself knowing that you're the reason why she now wears fake smiles, and can't seem to get close to any man or woman that has ever tried to love her?
Maybe it's because you're heartless, so you caused her to use her heart less, because she thinks that everyone around her simply couldn't even care less.
Is this really what you call a family?
***
"The audacity of you people," Maggie Jauregui's voice boomed through the Jauregui - Cabellos' kitchen. The family of three were now having breakfast. Camila was scheduled to have her family session today with Doctor Briggs; meaning that her stepmother, sister, mother along with herself were all in for a bumpy ride. She didn't know what to expect, but she was anticipating the worse. Meanwhile, Lauren had to work and Izzy was heading off to school. "No one even set a plate for me. I thought I told you guys I was coming to visit!" She pouted.
"AUNTY MAGGIE!" Izzy screamed and jumped off her chair, running into the awaiting arms of her aunt. "I missed you. It's been forever." The child buried her face in the crook of the woman's neck.
Maggie sighed in content and smiled. "Aw, isn't it my favourite niece." She placed various kisses on the child's face. "You have no idea how much I missed you and we FaceTimed every night!" She clutched onto the child tighter. "Please don't ever let me go. I'll die without you."
This had been the longest Maggie had been away from her niece. Usually her modelling gigs meant that she had to be away for maybe a week, but it had almost been three and she was practically dying without the little munchkin called Emilia Isabella aka her 'Mini Me'.
"Ehem," Lauren cleared her throat. "I missed you too."
The younger Jauregui sister laughed and walked towards her sister, she wrapped her free arm around her and did the same with her sister in law.
"I'm sorry. I didn't check my phone in a minute. But it's nice to have your annoying ass back," Lauren said. She slid a plate with some bacon and eggs towards her sister as the woman took a seat. "How was Madrid? Shouldn't you have been back sooner?"
Maggie shoved a fork full of bacon into her mouth. "Madrid was amazing as usual. Meeting my fans, the girls and guys who look up to me...it's such an incredible feeling to know that I inspire people, you know?" Camila nodded in understanding. Whenever someone told her how much she meant to them, or how she helped them through some hard times, she couldn't help but feel proud. "Andddd...I should've been back within a week, but I met up with someone." She blushed.
Camila smirked and pointed a finger at her. "Margarita Violetta Jauregui, don't you be holding out on me. Who was it? Does her name begin with an A, because I know a certain someone was in Spain the same time as you."
Lauren laughed at her wife's insinuation. She had lowkey been shipping Maggie and her old friend; Natasha, but whoever made her sister happy that's all that mattered.
The model rolled her eyes. "Yes, Camzii. I was with Ari. We spent a few days around Madrid. It was really nice."
"Are you two girlfriends?" Izzy asked after she took a sip of juice. Her eyes trained on her aunt.
"What do you know about girlfriends, Mini Me?"
Izzy shrugged. "Just that when you like someone, you want them to be your girlfriend and you can be best friends!"
Lauren snorted. Kids and their dumb definitions of things. "That's right, baby. Do you like Ariana?"
"I do." Maggie answered, then smacked her face with her palm. "You were talking to Izzy weren't you?"
"No use in denying it now, chica. The both of you better get married. I'm already mentally planning the wedding," Camila stood and placed all the empty dishes in the sink. "Maggie can you drop Izzy to school?"
The model shrugged. "Y'all paying for my gas?"
"You're rich," Camila stated.
"And? Gas is expensive," Lauren playfully punched her sister and ushered her daughter upstairs to brush her teeth and grab her jacket. It had been raining all morning and it was rather cold. "You guys have your session today or something?"
Camila sighed. "No. Just me."
"Then why do you look so glum? Is the marriage going downhill?" Maggie asked as she helped her sister in law do the dishes. Lauren came downstairs again with Izzy.
"I'll drop Izzy to school. Can you drop Camila off at Doctor Briggs?" Lauren asked her sister who nodded.
"Give mummy a kiss." Camila bent down and wrapped her daughter in a hug. "I love you, princesa."
"I love you too, mummy. Bye aunty Maggie. Love you!" Izzy wrapped her arms around her aunt's legs.
"Bye, Camz," Lauren placed a chaste kiss on Camila's lips, and smacked her sister. "Later, loser."
Maggie shoved her sister away. "Perrita!" She yelled at her sister, Lauren flipped her off. She then turned to her sister in law, smirking. "Sooo...why was I not informed that y'all are getting back at it? Lip lock action. Tonsil tennis. Canoodling." She fake wiped a tear. "My ship is sailing. Let me call Dinah."
Camila laughed and grabbed the woman's iPhone. "Maggie, behave! We're just making minor steps on the road of progress."
"Mhm," the model smirked and winked. "It's fine. Y'all don't have to tell me what goes on behind closed doors....bedroom doors that is."
The singer shoved her playfully, grabbed her jacket and car keys. "Come on, I don't want to be late."
***
The car ride was unbearably silent. Maggie had tried to initiate some conversation, but the playful mood that Camila had earlier was long gone. She kept glancing out the window and kept shaking her leg up and down.
Maggie placed her hand on Camila's thigh to stop the movement. "Okay, what the fuck is going on?" She glanced off the road to look at the woman in the passenger seat. "You seem nervous. Why?"
Camila sighed heavily. "I'm having a session with my mom, Valentina and Becky."
"Hold up, Valentina as in 'ruined your family Valentina'?"
The woman sighed and nodded. "Yeah that Valentina. It's all a part of letting go or some shit like that."
Maggie pulled up to a red light and studied Camila's expression. "Hey, it's going to be okay. You know that right?"
Camila shook her head 'no'. "I'm not...I'm not ready to see her as yet, Mags. I don't even know how I feel towards her. I don't know what I'm going to do when I see her." The light turned green and Maggie drove off. She grabbed one of Camila's hands and intertwined their fingers. "I'm still so angry at her for what she did...but then I met her daughter and she's literally the sweetest person I've ever met. After 26 years, Mags...I have a sister. A real life sister. I want to get to know her, to learn to love her. But I don't know if I can forgive her mother."
Maggie pulled up to a building and parked alongside the pavement. They had arrived rather early for Camila's session so they stayed outside. "You don't have to forgive her, you know?"
Camila stared at her.
"I mean...you don't have to forgive her just yet. You're sitting here and you don't know her side of the story or anyone's side to begin with, so it's obviously easy to say that you're angry, that you can't forgive her. Maybe she regrets it. Maybe she regrets hurting you guys. You don't know as yet," Maggie turned her body in place to face Camila, taking her hands in her again. "It doesn't lessen the fact that it hurt. She can be how sorry she wants, but I know it won't give you the years you missed with your dad back. But the thing is, you're not forgiving her to put her mind to ease...you're forgiving her for you. Because you have to. Because you need to. Because you need to be the parent for Izzy that you wanted, when you were falling apart. You need to do this to start healing, Camzii."
The words hit Camila so hard. Tears began to flow freely down her cheeks. Maggie wrapped her arms around her sister in law as best as she could. "It's going to be okay. I promise you, it's going to be okay." She pulled back from the hug and cupped Camila's cheeks in her hand, drying her tears with her thumbs. "And if it's not okay, I'm going to be here. Whether you want me to or not."
Camila let out a soft laugh. "God, you're annoying but I love you."
Maggie smiled. "I love you too, Camzii. I'll kill someone for you if I have to."
"Let's not go that far."
The model shrugged. "Just say the word and I'll grab my gun. I'm not white so I probably won't get off the hook. If something happens to me start a trend on twitter; #FreeMaggie."
Camila threw her head back in laughter. Her sister in law could always make her laugh and forget her problems. It was one of the reasons why they became so close so quick. She was extremely friendly and genuinely such a nice person, who couldn't love her?
"Thank you, Maggiesaurus. You're the best."
Maggie kinked an eyebrow. "Oh hell naw. That's a shitty name, get out my car."
"Oh shit. I forgot to check in with Becky to ensure that they were coming," Camila pulled out her phone and scrolled through her contacts looking for her sister. "I'll FaceTime her." After two rings, the girl's face was seen on the screen.
"Hey, Camila. What's up?" Becky smiled when she saw her sister.
Maggie grabbed Camila's phone. "Ooh shit, girl. You fine. How old are you?"
Becky blushed. "I'm 16."
"16 turning 17; which means almost 18. Or just turned 16," Maggie stared at the girl in awe. "You're like so beautiful though. What the hell."
Camila smacked the woman and took her phone back. "She's 16 turning 17 soon." She then addressed Becky. "That's my sister in law; Maggie. She takes some getting used to."
Becky laughed. "Tell her she's cute."
"You're cuter," Maggie popped back into the screen. "We'll be seeing more of each other." She winked.
Camila rolled her eyes and stepped out of Maggie's Range Rover. "I forgot to ask, are you guys coming today? You and Valentina."
Becky nodded and showed Camila around the room that she was in. "We're literally in the waiting room. Your mom is here as well. Where are you?"
Upon knowing that her sister and stepmother were already there waiting for her, her heart rate began to accelerate. She wasn't ready to do this, but she had to. Maggie was right. She had to do this for her. After a minute, Camila hung up the phone.
"Do you want me to go in with you?" Maggie asked, concern laced in her tone.
Camila nodded. "Y-yeah," she muttered. "Thank you."
The model nodded and took her sister in law's hand in hers and then headed into the building. The elevator ride was a lot longer than she remembered, when the doors opened, she exhaled loudly and her grip on Maggie's hand tightened.
"Fuck. Girl you got a strong ass grip. Geez, Louise." Maggie muttered as she pulled away and rubbed her hand.
Becky was the first to approach them. She pulled Camila into a hug. "Hey, you doing okay?"
Camila sighed and shrugged. "I'm doing okay. Where's your..." She didn't have any time to finish her question. That's when she saw Valentina sitting a few metres off, next to her mother. She had her legs crossed and was engrossed in conversation. Camila couldn't help but stare at the woman. It had been years since she had seen her. Her facial features had matured. Her figure had developed into more of a woman. At the time she was working for Alejandro, she was in her early twenties, so she was bound to mature.
"Camila..."
The name rolled off Valentina's tongue so smoothly. It sounded the same way it did, when Camila had actually liked her.
"Valentina," Camila said curtly. Sinu stood and greeted her daughter with the biggest of hugs. God, did she know how much Camila needed that. "Hey, mom. Thanks for coming."
Sinu shrugged. "I had nothing better to do anyway." She pulled Maggie in a hug as well, who had seemed to busy herself with talking to Becky. She had gotten the teenager's number and they had exchanged social media, as well. "Look at you. It feels like I haven't seen you in ages."
Maggie laughed and hugged Sinu back. "We saw each other for Camila's birthday, Sinu. It hasn't been that long."
The old woman made a 'oh whatever' movement with her hand, and took a seat. "Where's my granddaughter? You haven't brought her over in so long, Camilita. I miss her."
Camila sighed. "We've been a bit busy. Maybe later you can come over?" Sinu nodded. Before anyone could utter another word, Doctor Briggs stepped into the waiting room.
"Greetings, everyone. My name is Doctor Briggs, it's nice to have all of you here," Doctor Briggs smiled brightly at everyone. "Before we get into anything, Camila, can I have a moment with you alone in my office?" Camila nodded and followed her therapist into her office. "How are you doing today?" Chelsea asked as she took a seat, pulling out her notepad.
The singer shrugged. "Well for starters the woman my dad cheated on my mom with is sitting right outside this room, along with my half sister, and we're all about to sit in her and talk about our feelings...how do you think I'm feeling?" Doctor Briggs simply stared at her. "I'm holding on to the last bit of calm that I can muster."
The therapist nodded. "And how did your assignment go? Did you carry it out?"
At the mention of that, a small smile appeared on Camila's face. "Yeah, I did it. I decided to do a romantic dip in our Jacuzzi. We kissed a lot and it was pretty...out there," she made a random hand gesture. "Then we talked and stuff. It was really amazing. Lauren was shocked at first, but she eventually allowed it to happen. From her kissing me, I could tell that she was really into it."
Doctor Briggs nodded and wrote in her pad. "How has things been between the both of you after this assignment?"
"Well, we've been openly cuddling in front of Izzy. It seems more natural now. It just happens automatically, you know? I would be watching television, and Lauren would sit next to me, then next thing I know, we're both laying down on the couch, she's playing with my hair and kissing my cheek." The therapist was making notes as Camila went along. "Izzy seems to notice it too, because I've seen her on many occasions just looking at us and grinning." She smiled at the mention of her daughter. Camila couldn't be happier that her daughter wasn't worried about her not returning, about her parents going to leave her. A child was never supposed to worry about these things.
"I'm glad to hear that, Camila. What you did for your assignment was a nice touch. And it's only natural that things are starting to fall back into please," Doctor Briggs placed her notepad to the side of her on a table. "Give me a moment, I'm going to call your family in."
Camila nodded and tried to steady her breathing. A moment later, everyone came into the room. She saw Maggie in the doorway giving a thumbs up and signing that she was going to wait there for her.
Becky took a seat next to Camila on her right, meanwhile Sinu sat on her daughter's left; and Valentina sitting on her own daughter's right.
"Allow me to reintroduce myself. I'm Doctor Chelsea Briggs. I'm a psychotherapist. I've been a marriage counsellor for almost ten years," she walked around and shook the strangers' hands. "You must be Sinu, Rebecca and Valentina?" Everyone nodded.
"You can call me Becky. Rebecca seems too formal," her mother stared at her but didn't say anything.
Doctor Briggs nodded. "The reason that you're all here today is to help Camila here, understand and work through some things with her late father; Alejandro. Camila, if I may?" She directed the question towards her client who nodded. "Well, my client, Camila here, came to me a couple months ago seeking help in learning to let go of the past and to accept certain things about her. To forgive herself for the things she cannot change, and to forgive those who have hurt her. And in order for her to move pass this, she needs to hash out the root of her problems; which revolves around her father's act of infidelity."
Valentina and Sinu nodded. Meanwhile, Becky kept playing with something that was in her jacket pocket.
"But before we go any further, I'll like to inform you that I will be making notes throughout our session. Is that okay with you all?" They nodded. "So, let's dive right in, shall we?" She turned towards her client. "Camila, can you tell us about how you discovered your father's act of infidelity. I want you to tell us how you felt."
All eyes fell on Camila. Her breathing rate increased. She took a deep breath in and began. "I remember the day too well. It's something I wish I couldn't. I think I had recently turned 7. Mom, you were out that day. I was sick so you made me take a day off school," she turned to look at her mother. "Dad had been taking really good care of me. He told me to stay in my room and that he would come in every hour to see how I was doing. But me being a kid, I didn't want to stay coped up in my room all day. When I went downstairs...." Camila paused. She felt her throat tightening. She just wished that Lauren was here with her, but unfortunately that wasn't so. "I saw you," Camila stared at Valentina. "I saw you kissing my father. The woman who I called my aunt. The woman who took such good care of me whenever my mother wasn't around. How could you do that? How could betray my family's trust in you?!" The bitter tears flowed down Camila's cheeks. Sinu placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder.
Doctor Briggs made a note of this. She studied Valentina's reaction. The way she flinched due to Camila's accusations. The sadness that laced the woman's eyes when she was listening to Camila's story. Her head was facing front, maybe due to the fact that she couldn't simply look the woman in her eyes. The woman who's father she had took away when she was just a little girl.
"So, after you discovered this, you told your mother?"
Becky handed Camila a tissue, that she graciously took and dabbed her eyes. "Yes. They got a divorce when I was 8."
Doctor Briggs nodded. "How old were you when, Becky was born? Did you know she existed?"
Camila sighed. "I must've been 9, I think when she was born. I knew he had started a family after the divorce, but I only found out a few years leading up to his death about her."
"And you have never met before this? Did you have any sort of communication before?"
The singer looked between Becky and her mother; the teenager nodded as though signalling her that it was okay for her mother to find out that they had met. "Y-yeah. We bumped into each other a couple weeks ago at the park. Then a couple meetings after, she told me who she was."
"What was it like when your father left? Did you get to see him on weekends, during the holidays, etc?"
Camila laughed through her tears. "I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to have anything to do with him. He came to my school a few times, but I ended up getting a ride each time with some of my friends' parents just to avoid him." She recalled the memory of avoiding her father at all costs. She looked up and stared at nothing in particular. Becky kept staring at her sister's side profile. She saw the way Camila's lips quivered with every question relating to their dad; she saw the tears flow from her sister's eyes. She saw just how much their father had hurt her. "Eventually he stopped coming. He stopped calling me. Post cards on my birthdays, Christmas...they never came."
Sinu scooted closer to her daughter and wrapped an arm around her waist. She knew just how hard of a topic this was for her.
"I have to admit something..." Doctor Briggs allowed Camila to proceed. "One day, I was like 13 I think. I had gotten off from school early. You weren't home," Camila said to her mother. "I didn't know what caused me to go to their house. My feet had a mind of it's own, they propelled me forward, until I was standing in front their house, looking through their windows," Camila wiped her tears with the sleeve of her jacket. "And that's when I saw him. He had Becky in his hands. The biggest smile on his face, as he spun around with her. I could've only assumed she was laughing, because you had a smile on your face too," Becky nodded as though she had vaguely remembered the memory of that day. "Then I saw Valentina watching them. I felt the anger, the jealousy, everything..." She had to pause because the tears were becoming too much for her. "That...that was my breaking point. I was so mad at him. I was so hurt, because why her not me? She got his love so easy. He gave her unconditional love, and all I got was conditional love," Camila angrily wiped her tears. "So I ran away without even looking back. I never went there again."
Doctor Briggs allowed Camila a moment to compose herself. Her mother had pulled her into her arms and kept whispering little nothings into her ear, trying to soothe her pain.
"I want every one of you, to speak about the time leading up to his death. Sinu," Chelsea turned towards Camila's mother. "We're starting with you. How was it leading up to Alejandro's death?"
Sinu nodded and began to speak. "I didn't see him as much as Valentina, but the days I went to the hospital, he had kept asking for Camila," she looked at her daughter who just shrunk into her seat. "He made me promise that I would always take good care of her. He wasn't as talkative as he used to be, but then again he never really was to begin with," Sinu laughed to herself. "When he died, I felt as though I lost a part of me. I had forgiven him for every hurt that he had caused me, because he was my one true love, but losing him was another type of pain. I've gotten over it. I've made my peace with it. I just hope that he's in a better place. Por la gracia de Dios."
Doctor Briggs kept making her notes. She came to the conclusion that Sinu was obviously more forgiving than her daughter. But the thing is, children tend to have a strong bond with their parents, they tend to look up to them, and though they may be naive; Camila had expected a lot from her father. Only to be let down and hurt.
"Becky, it's your turn."
Rebecca had looked between her mother and the therapist. She didn't think she had to say something; she thought she was just there for show, or to stop Camila from killing her mother.
"Um.. I don't think my side of the story is necessary," Becky awkwardly rubbed the back her head. "I don't you know...remember anything significant."
"Rebecca," was all her mother stated that ceased her rambling.
The teenager sighed. "I wasn't even 6 yet," she side eyed her mother. Like how did this woman expect her to remember all that? "But I remember how he would always mention a girl. He never gave me her name, but he showed me a picture. I remember telling him that she looked just like me," Becky glanced at Camila. "He would tell me that he misses her. I didn't know what to do, so I would just hug him. I remember seeing the sadness in his eyes, but back then, I didn't know what it was." Becky sighed. "Those were the days he was sober anyway," she shrugged.
Rebecca paused, she inhaled and exhaled loudly. She had never spoken about her father like this. Sure, she would've entertained the topic of her father, but at the time, she was young and she couldn't remember much, nor did she get much time with him.
"The days where he was drunk out of his mind, I would overhear him and my mom arguing. They argued a lot," she turned to face her mother. "Y'all argued about every single thing, and I guess you didn't even care to see if I was up. To see if I was okay...and truth is mom, I wasn't okay. I would cry myself to sleep every night because I thought it was my fault," when the first tear rolled down Becky's cheeks, she tried her best to contain herself. "And when papi died...you put so much pressure on me; to the point that I think you hate me. I tried so hard to make you happy, to make papi happy because I thought that's why you pushed me so hard...but now? I don't even know. We don't even talk anymore. Sure, we talk, but we don't talk at the same time." She told her mother; whose own eyes were filled with unshed tears.
"OKAY!" Valentina yelled. "That's enough. I get it, okay? I get it! I'm a horrible person. I ruined your family," she faced Camila and her mother. "And apparently I was too stuck in my own head to know that I was ruining my own." She grabbed her purse. "But I'm not going to stay here and be a target for anyone. Rebecca, come on."
Doctor Briggs interjected the woman's fit. "Mrs Cabello, if I may," Valentina stopped. "No one here is targeting you. They're all giving their take on the death of your late husband." The therapist motioned to the couch; her daughter had not moved, but she seemed a bit upset by what she had just said. It wasn't Becky's intention to hurt her mother's feelings. "We need to hear your story as well. Please, have a seat."
"Why? What's the point? I'm being blamed for everything."
Camila scoffed. "Don't go around acting as though you're the victim here! How could you?!" She screamed at the woman she had spent so many years with. "I TRUSTED YOU! I loved you as though you were my blood!" Bitter tears were rolling down her face. She stood to be at Valentina's height. "Did you not once think, think for a moment about what you were doing?! Did I not matter one bit to you?"
Valentina's eyes were red; she kept wiping at them but the tears never ceased.
"Camila...I.." Her stepmother began but she stopped. She reached an arm out for her stepdaughter but Camila moved away. "I'm...sorry." Valentina managed to muster out. Her voice cracking at the end.
Becky took her mom's hand and made her sit. She then turned towards her sister. "I know you're hurt, Camila. What you feel towards my mom, is a pain I don't think I will ever fully understand." Becky took Camila in her arms. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you had to go through all this. You don't deserve it."
The singer sniffled and looked at her sister. "Neither did you," she ran her fingers through Becky's hair. "I got the good times with our dad. I got a man who cared about his family. Who never argued in front of me. I got the real him...but you?" Her younger sister sighed and looked down. "You got the shit years. You didn't deserve that either. None of this is your fault."
Becky shook her head and smiled. "None of it is yours either, Mila." Camila smiled at the slip up of a nickname. She pulled her sister into a hug and dried her own tears.
Upon retaking their seats, Sinu placed her hand on her daughter's thigh and searched her eyes for an answer as to her well-being. "Mija, te quiero." She placed a kiss on Camila's forehead.
"I love you too, mami."
Doctor Briggs made her notes throughout this, choosing not to interrupt as it was a means of letting everyone release their built up emotions. Seeing that the drama had died down, she turned to address her client's stepmother. "Valentina, can you tell us what you remember leading up to your husband's death?"
All eyes were on Valentina. Becky slipped her hand into her mother's and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Ale...he was one of the sweetest men that I had ever met. He was charming, a gentleman, he was such a great father to you, Camila. I know our meeting wasn't...ideal for the lack of a better word, but I truly loved him. It was never my intention to let it go the way it did. It wasn't my intention to hurt you, Sinu," she looked at her husband's ex wife, who simply nodded with a smile on her face. "And it wasn't my intention to hurt you, Camila. You were only a child and I took away your father from you. I blame myself everyday for his death; but I can't do anything about it now."
Camila didn't say anything. She just sat there processing everything that's as coming out of the woman's mouth.
"He spoke about you guys so much; that's why were argued all the time," Valentina looked to her own daughter. "He made me feel guilty and I know I was, but the both of us were the ones to blame. It was just supposed to be a one time thing...but it turned out to be more than that. I ended up falling for him. I couldn't help it."
The heart wants what it wants; even though it was a married man with a six year old daughter.
"When he started drinking himself to a stupor, I tried to convince him to visit you, to try to talk to you," Valentina looked at Camila. The singer's eyes were filled with pain that no one would understand unless they were in her shoes. "But he was so afraid that you would turn him away. That day...that day you saw us; Rebecca, your father and I, he saw you. He ran out of the house but you were already too far off. He wanted to follow after you, but he collapsed. He was already so sick that doing simple tasks were too much for him."
Camila felt her heart clench at the thought of her father laying on the ground. She should've stayed but she was too angry. Too caught up in her own feelings. Sinu took her daughter's hand in hers and kissed it lightly.
"He loved you, Camila. Until his dying breath. He loved you."
Doctor Briggs turned towards her client. "Camila, do you have anything to say?" But the woman shook her head 'no', trying to wrap her head around what her stepmother had just said. "Now, tell us, Camila, how did you react to finding out about your father's death?"
Camila shook her head. "I...I can't keep reliving this, Chelsea. I-I can't." She was about to stand, but Becky held her hand; stopping her.
"Hey, look at me," Becky said. "You're not in this alone, okay? I'm here. I'm here," Camila's younger sister, pulled the woman into a hug; and rubbed soothing circles into her back. Valentina looking on at the interaction between the two sisters. She was always a bit skeptical for when they were to meet, but this was a lot different than she had imagined. "It's going to be okay," Becky said to her as they pulled away from the hug.
Camila nodded and took a minute to compose herself. "I..uh..I'm sorry about that." She laughed awkwardly and cleared her throat.
"It's okay, Camila. We're here to help you. It's okay to feel as though you're not able to relive these painful memories, but in order to move on, you have to talk about them and to let go."
"When I found out he was sick, I tried to hide just how much it affected me. When my mom was at work, I would sneak into my dad's study at home and just sit at his desk, looking at the room where he spent most of his time. I wanted to feel close to him," Camila sighed. "When my mom told me he died, I felt my heart shatter one last time because of him. I lost a little weight because I wasn't eating. I felt like I lost every last bit of sanity I had. I was filled with so much regret that I tried to bury those feelings with the hate that I had for what he did."
Doctor Briggs placed her notepad on her lap and addressed Camila. "You need to work on forgiving yourself, Camila. Your father's transgressions weren't because of you. You can't keep blaming yourself for someone's inability to love you and be the person you wanted them to be."
Camila sighed and nodded. Not saying anything again. Becky took her sister's hand in hers, bringing it to her lips and lightly kissing it. Camila smiled softly. Their relationship had slowly began to blossom after the revelation; the two weren't close per say, but chances of getting there was rather high.
"The pain I feel, I don't think I will ever get over it," Camila sighed heavily.
"That's the thing about pain, it needs time to heal. You will never be the same, but you will heal. And you will be so much stronger than this. All of you," Doctor Briggs addressed everyone. "You all have decades of pain and anger built up in your hearts; except for maybe you Sinu, but he had hurt you at one point. What I would like for you all to allow me to do, is to teach you how to better communicate with one another."
Becky and Sinu nodded without hesitation, meanwhile Valentina and Camila were a bit reluctant but they nodded either way.
"Okay, Camila what is your current feelings towards Valentina?"
The Argentinean singer sighed heavily. "I..I haven't forgiven you yet," she glanced at the woman. "But I don't hate you. You were a major part of my life and I would like that someday we would be able to move pass all this." Valentina had a small smile gracing her lips as she nodded at Camila.
"Now tell us about your feelings towards your sister."
Becky turned and stared at her sister expectantly. "Come on, lay it on us," she drummed her lap excitedly. "Tell me how much you love meee."
Camila laughed and threw and arm over her shoulder, pulling her close to her chest. "I feel like all my life I wanted a sister." She rolled her eyes at her mom who just laughed. "I had sister-like figures in my life but not a real sister. We missed out so many years in each other's lives, but now that she's here; in my life, I want to get to know you. Everything about you. I want to learn how to love you. How to be the person that you need. I want to be there for you. You're pretty rad, Beckster."
"Aww," Rebecca tackled her in a hug. "You're melting my heart. You're already the best big sister. You're pretty rad yourself, Mila."
Both mothers smiled at the interaction between the sisters, they glanced up at one another and nodded; as though saying that they were glad that they seemed to be getting along. That they have each other now. No more hiding. No more hurting.
Even Doctor Briggs had a small smile on her face.
"Lastly, Camila, Becky, I want you both to tell us something about your father. Camila, you can go first."
Camila sat upright and straightened her clothes. "My dad was one of the best men I ever knew. Whenever we had dessert, and I finished mine, dad would always sneak me a piece when mom wasn't looking. We would high five each other under the table as though we had gotten away with an entire crime." She laughed.
"Just letting you know, mija...I was onto your dad and you. I see everything," Sinu said, causing Camila and Becky to laugh. "You're not as sneaky as you think, kiddo." She playfully ruffled her daughter's hair.
"Becky? Your turn."
Becky paused and thought for a moment. "I loved my dad, and I mean after everything everyone just said about him, after everything that I know, I simply cannot hate him. He's the only father that I know."
"He loved you too, Rebecca," Valentina placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder. "You were his youngest and even though you didn't spend much time with him, you were his heart."
The teenager nodded. "I know, mami. I know. I love you. Despite everything, I love you so much."
Valentina wrapped her daughter in her arms. "I know I've been hard on you and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I haven't been the mother that you need but I love you so much, princesa. Te quiero, mucho." She placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead and caressed her face. "You are my entire heart. I love you."
Becky smiled. "I love you, mami," Camila looked on at the interaction between the two and leaned into her mother who wrapped her arm around her. "Papi, would always take me to this animal shelter, where we would volunteer and stuff. That's where I met Nugget's mom. I wanted her so much, but I was 'too young'," she made air quotes with her fingers, "as dad said to get one. No matter how tired he was when he got home from work, he would take me to the shelter. And I guess that's one of my favourite memory of us."
Camila squeezed her sister's hand and smiled at her.
Doctor Briggs placed her notepad down. "Well, I think that's all that we have time for today. Thank you so much for coming. You all should be proud of yourselves for being so forthcoming, so honest with not just each other but yourselves as well. Today, will allow for you to let go, and to move forward as a family. It will obviously take some time, but this is just one step on your road to recovery. Thank you for coming today." She stood and shook everyone's hands. "Before you all go, I want to do an activity with you all, around this same time next week."
Camila kinked an eyebrow. "This isn't it?"
"No. The week after that, will be your partner's session. But next week, I'll like for all of us to reconvene here, is that okay?"
Sinu shrugged because she had nothing else to do, meanwhile Becky looked to her mom silently asking if it was okay for her to miss another day of school; she nodded.
"Okay. That's it for today. Enjoy the rest of your day."
They all exited the room. Camila met up with Maggie; and they all went their separate ways. Today had been one hell of a day, but it was worth it.
Anyone with eyes could see that the Cabello family wasn't perfect. But that's the thing about family, they are forever. You can't choose your family, but you can choose if you want to be in each other's lives. And Camila chose to be in their lives; as did the others.
***
Deadass one of THE longest chapters I've ever written. But the Cabellos seemed to have resolved their problems...for now 😉
Kidding!
Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter.
Stay tuned for more 🦋