"You have to tell him."
"I can't- I should never have told you. I won't even be able to get close enough without getting hexed. Just tell me the password, I can find a way into the common room-"
"I don't know it! It changes nightly, I told you that." I sighed, chewing on my bottom lip as Draco ran his hands through his hair in agitation. We had come to the conclusion that I was fine to leave the safety of the boys dorm now, with the dilemma of having no way to do so. I had no polyjuice potion on me, no way of hiding as I roamed the halls. Which left us in our current argument: I wanted Draco to get Neville to fetch it for me.
He was against the idea.
"He knows about me! And hell, your friends know about me- Why can't mine know of you?"
"Because they'll hate me more than they do already?"
"They do not-"
"Yes, they do."
"Maybe a little, but I still need my polyjuice potion. No way I'll be able to get back to the common room entrance without being spotted. And I don't know the pasword. I'd be stuck. You need to find Neville and get the potion from him. Him or Ginny. But Neville's less likely to hex on sight, I promise."
"If I end up losing a hand-"
"You'll be fine. Now please. Please?" I pulled my lips into a faint pout, staring up at him with an expression that I hope came off as cute and pleading. I felt slightly cross-eyed, so I wasn't sure. Draco sighed as he watched me, gently taking my face in his hands. He watched me with a soft expression, lips twisted in uncertainty. Finally he spoke.
"The things I do for you."
"You know you adore me." I said with a faint smile, leaning up and pressing my lips lightly against his. I was pleasantly surprised when, instead of pulling away like he had done before, he pressed closer, a soft sigh leaving his lips as he pulled me closer to him. I smiled giddily, letting my fingers grip the collar of his shirt tightly for the moment.
"Damn right." He muttered against my lips, sending my chest into a flutter. Dumb boy. I was in war, and here I was floating on air. Pulling away, I grinned at him in triumph.
"So go find Neville. I'll wait here." I said, pointedly, pulling myself completely from him and going to sit at the end of his bed. Leaning over, I picked the glass vial of polyjuice potion that sat on his trunk and held it out to him. "Drink up."
"Why can't you drink that and go as me? Find your own damn friends."
"I don't want to get hexed." I said as he took it from me, staring at the liquid with distaste before downing it. I watched as his skin bubbled, darkening like his hair and eyes. He melted away quickly and silently, and then Marcus Thatcher stood before me, a look of distaste on his features.
"It's weird to look at you now like that. Knowing who you actually are." I commented, taking the potion back from him. He smiled lightly, more of a smirk really, and nodded.
"Vice versa, love. C'mere." He said, holding out his hand. Raising an eyebrow I took it, letting him pull me to my feet and close. As Thatcher he was slightly shorter, and it made me smile. He watched me with an expression of mild exasperation.
"If I get hexed, you're paying my medical bills."
I laughed.
"You ass!" I claimed, smacking his arm as he stepped away, grinning slyly. "Go get my potion! If you come without it, I'm taking over your bed. Then you'll never be rid of me."
He brightened up considerably at that, his grin contagious.
"Is that a promise?"
_
"I thought you said he was the one less likely to hex on sight." Draco groaned lightly, letting his head hang back. He held a cloth to his nose as he pinched it, trying to stop the blood. I grimaced weakly.
"Well, I wasn't wrong. He didn't use his wand."
"You're right. He used his fist." Draco said, wincing as I pressed a cold pack onto the bruise on his cheek. "That's much better."
"At least your nose isn't broken." I sighed with a grimace. "Not that that would be difficult to fix. But still."
"It's the thoughts that counts, right?" He said, then when I nodded he rolled his eyes. "Bullshit."
"Oh, shut it and keep pressing the pack to your face." I said, sipping at the last of my polyjuice potion. I crinkled my nose up in distaste as it slid down my throat, leaving me feeling slightly queasy. Draco made a small snort of laughter before groaning in pain, hanging his head defeat. I smiled amusedly, setting the potion down. I was sure I didn't look like myself anymore, and it was funny to me that neither did Draco. So different. But it was us all the same. Us. I was glad to be part of an us again.
"Let me see your nose." I said as I leaned over, pulling his hand away. He groaned in faint protest as did so, leaning up slightly for a better look. He stared back at me reproachfully as I inspected his nose, using the cloth to wipe away some of the blood. It would definitely be bruised later.
"This may come as a shocker," I began with an amused smile, setting the cloth down beside us. "But you're gonna live."
"And here I thought it was fatal." He scoffed, rolling his eyes as I grinned. I nearly shrieked though when he stood up, picking me up with him. I clung to his shoulders quickly, hiding my face in his shirt as nausea swept through me from the sudden movement.
"You could warn me next time."
"Maybe don't be such a smartass next time." He suggested, his voice quiet against my ear.
"You love me." I said back, pulling away to stare at him with a sly smile. He smirked back, eyes dark. Under the polyjuice potion, I could very much see my Draco. My Draco, very much alive. The thought made me smile even as he leant down, his lips pressing to mine.
_
I was walking down the halls later, making my way back to the safety of the Gryffindor common room. I was very aware of the fact that I had on a boy's shirt, raggedy, blood-stained jeans and no shoes, but it was my luck that I had yet to run into anyone yet. I wasn't quite sure how to explain my two-day disappearance yet, nor quite ready.
"Alecia?" Neville's voice was filled with surprise as I turned a corner, and I looked over as my best friend approached, eyes wide and arms already outstretched. I smiled in relief, falling into them and hugging him back tightly.
"Hey, Neville."
"Are you alright? I heard what happened, with the Carrows, and the whip-"
"Yeah, I know. My back is pretty scratched up- I can have Luna look at it later if need be. But I'm okay. A little shaken. Little tired. But okay." I said with a soft smile, before remembering something. I looked up at him with a frown. "You punched my boyfriend."
"At the time, I did not know he was your boyfriend."
"But-"
"I still would have punched him if I had known, yes. Is Malfoy really Thatcher?"
"Shhh!" I hushed, smacking his arm lightly. "Obviously you know the answer to that, and you have to keep quiet. His position is as important as mine, if not more dangerous. You have to keep that insanely secret. That means no one in the D.A, not even Ginny."
"Why not Ginny?"
"She hates Dr- Thatcher more than you do, that's why." I sighed as we continued down the hall, Neville holding me close to his side. It was an easier walk when I wasn't holding all my own weight, and most of the blood was blocked from view. "Besides, I'm not even supposed to know."
"But I thought he was dead- No offense. Ginnny told me." Neville commented as we stopped in front of the Fat Lady's portrait. I didn't reply til Neville spoke the password and we were crawling through, the opening shutting firmly behind us.
"It wasn't a secret. I just didn't talk about it. You know- Kinda painful. Because I thought he was. It all a ploy, a cover up- A rather cruel one, if you ask me."
"I hope he apologized." Neville said, offering me a hand to step down the single step and into the common room. I took it gratefully, a small smile pulling at my lips.
"Oh, he did."
_
"So do you think the Carrows are gonna be suspicious at all that you left before they let you?" Neville asked from where he sat across from me. I gave a weak shrug, wincing as the movement disturbed the cuts on my back.
"I don't think they'll directly say anything. I was out of it for two days, so I assume they're pretty sure they left a lasting impression." I grumbled over my soup, stirring the thick green-colored liquid with a sigh. "And they certainly did. We have to be more careful, you know. I was just trying to steal a book."
"Did you ever find it?" Ginny chimed in from beside me, eyebrows raised. While she had demanded an explanation as soon as she had found me, she accepted what I did tell her and, while slightly annoyed, didn't press about what I couldn't. She sat beside me now and was acting slightly like a pillow, letting me lean against her. My back ached, and it was difficult to stay straight for too long. Ginny helped, and I loved her for it.
"No. Didn't even get to it." I sighed, frowning slightly. "It wasn't there."
"It was missing? Maybe someone else checked it out."
"Possibly. I can't imagine who though." I mumbled, using my good hand to lift some of the soup into my mouth. Pea soup, I identified. Not my favorite, but I hadn't had a proper meal in hours, and my stomach was hurting for it.
"Maybe one of the Slytherins. Or the Carrows themselves."
"Yeah." I hummed absent-mindedly. "Maybe."
"Who took care of you, anyway? I know it wasn't any of the D.A." Ginny hummed lightly, picking at her slice of bread. I gave a small shrug, winced, then sighed.
"I told you, Ginny. You don't want to know."
"Was it Thatcher?" She asked, eyes narrowed. I grimaced, biting into my soup. I opened my mouth to reply that no, it was not, but Ginny was already smirking, eyes lit up. She could read me too well.
"It was Thatcher!"
"Shush!" I groaned, hanging my head in defeat. "Yes! Kind of. I'll explain tonight, if you'd like-" Merlin, I caved to her much too quickly. But explaining that it was Draco seemed far easier than coming up with some wayward story about why Thatcher would even lift a finger towards me- "But not now. I'm eating now. We can talk later."
"And I can have full permission to drain every detail from you?"
"Naturally."
Ginny grinned then, pretty brown eyes bright. "Excellent."
For her, maybe. But as I sat on Ginny's bunk, picking out my favorites of Bertie Bott's every flavor bean, I was beginning to doubt my decision of telling her everything. But she was my friend, and she wasn't crazy. She was determined, yes, and brave, but not rash nor mean. She was fiery. And she would understand.
I hope.
Ginny sat before now dressed in her pajamas, long hair braided back and hanging over one shoulder. Seeing her made me think of my cousin, and my heart hurt a little, with both guilt and worry. I knew he'd be okay. But I also knew he must be going through a hell of a time. With Christmas right around the corner, he and Hermione surely would be visiting Bathilde Bagshot soon. No saying where Ron was.
"So, where do you want me to begin?" I asked finally. Ginny watched me for a moment, brown eyes narrowed in thought before she spoke.
"Was it Thatcher who helped you?"
"Kind of."
"How kind of?"
"He's kind of.." Oh, boy. "He's kind of not actually Thatcher."
Ginny blinked, looking surprisingly unstartled by the news. "How is he not Thatcher?"
"He takes polyjuice potion."
"So you got help from someone on polyjuice potion. Do I know them?"
"Yes." I said slowly, watching her face carefully. She nodded, mulling the information around in her head.
"Do I know them well?"
"No."
"Are they in the Order?"
Deep breaths. "Yes."
"I have no bloody idea who it is." Ginny finally said after a moment, popping a green-colored bean into her mouth. "Who is it?"
"It's Draco."
She nearly spit the candy out at that, brown eyes widening. I grimaced as she coughed, regaining control as she stared up at me, obviously at a loss. "Malfoy? Thatcher is Draco Malfoy?"
I grimaced, shrugging weakly. "Yeah."
"But I thought he was dead. Lily- You told me he was dead."
"I thought he was too! It was all a lie, Ginny. The Order faked it- It's a long story, but I swear, it's him. It's really Draco."
"And he let you believe he was dead? For months? Lily I saw you, you were devastated-"
"Yes, Ginny, I'm well aware!" I said sharply, wincing as my voice raised as my temper did. Calming down, I sighed before shaking my head. "I know. And I was furious with him- I still am on some level, trust me, but he's alive, Ginny. He's alive."
"But- That git! I'm happy for you, but that git!"
I smiled weakly, blinking back the few tears that had managed to gather in my eyes. Nonsensical crying, that would be. Ginny looked completely flabbergasted, but obviously she believed me, and that meant the world. It was also nice to have her know, to have someone to talk about it with. Not that I couldn't with Neville, it's just... Neville was very much a boy. And while Ginny was no gossiping teenager, she leant her ear and shoulder to me when needed, and that meant the world.
I smiled with a laugh, tucking a fallen hair back into place. "Thanks, Ginny."
"No problem of mine. And he's still going to pretend to be Thatcher, and you Alecia?"
"Obviously. He's under cover for the Order- Working, just like I am. Just spying on the other side more... Deeply, I guess."
"Wow." Ginny pursed her lips. "Never expected that of Malfoy."
"I don't think he did, either."
_
"As seventh years, I expect you to be fully capable of such spells. Transiguration may be tricky, but impossible it is not." McGonagall stood at the front of the classroom, looking over at the class with a put on expression of seriousness. Argus Filch stood a few feet behind her, keeping a steady eye on not only the students but the professor as well, ready to report any misstep. I kept my head down for the most part, trying to keep the hatred that boiled in my blood from showing in my eyes.
It was December eighth, and next Friday everyone would be leaving for Christmas break. Only a few would stay behind to brave the Carrows. I was one of them. I shuffled impatiently in class, wanting to leave. My friends- Friends meaning Ginny, Luna and Neville- Were all currently serving detention for the attempted stealing of Godric Gryffindor's sword. Which left me completely by myself for the day, spare the company of one person.
"Are you taking notes?" Lavender peeked over my shoulder from where she sat beside me. I grimaced then, glancing over at her and shaking my head.
"No, sorry. I'm a horrible student."
"Don't apologize, so am I. I'll nag Parvati later." Lavender hummed with a shrug, turning her eyes back to her own paper. I sunk down in my seat as Filch passed by, beginning his minutely pacing of the school room. I could hear his footsteps even over McGonagall's voice, as loud and firm as it was.
Occasionally I would sneak a glance to my left, to peak at the boy whom I knew sat only a few feet away from me. He appeared to be taking notes, though I wasn't sure it was entirely on the lesson, the way his brows would furrow every now and then in frustration, the ring on his finger glinting in the light as he tapped it on his lips. I didn't think the lesson was that hard. Though I suppose I wasn't really paying attention.
"You're not very subtle. I'm surprised the entire school doesn't know." Lavender's voice came into my thoughts again. I scowled lightly, tearing my eyes away from the disguised Draco to glare at my friend.
"I've not the faintest idea what you're talking about."
"You, Thatcher. Together. Or at least sort of. You make puppy dog eyes at him, and then when you don't look, he stares at you in a way that would be much more suited for the bedroom. It's making me uncomfortable. I'd be appreciative if you told him to quit it, before I shove my quil up his nose."
"Lavender!"
"What? I'm just being honest."
"Well, don't be." I hushed, not able to keep the pink out of cheeks. I ducked my head down on my arms in embarrassment, though something else was pumping through my veins at the same time. Did he really look at me like that?
"Fine then. No need to be so bashful about it- It's just me. I won't judge."
"There's nothing to judge." I muttered, bringing my head to briefly write something down on the paper. I had to make it look as though I was at least attempting to learn. But it was difficult when, for the rest of class, I was very aware of the eyes on me.
_
"I wish I wasn't leaving."
"I wish you weren't leaving." I said mournfully, watching as Ginny finished packing her trunk. She was about to leave for Christmas holiday,a holiday I knew she wouldn't return from. She would go into hiding with the rest of her family, just as Neville would go into hiding in the school soon. Maybe I would have to, too. The thought made my stomach twist uncomfortably.
"You'll be safer though at home." I sighed, falling back onto her bed.
"Maybe, but it's not like I won't be coming back." Ginny hummed, before separating a sweater from her pile and holding it out to me. "Would you want to wear this? It gets much colder in the castle this month, and I'll be fine at home."
"Yeah, sure. Thanks." I hummed, taking the cream-colored sweater from her and placing it in my lap. Ginny smiled at me as she shut her trunk, taking a deep breath. "Well, that's the last of it. Want to walk down with me?"
"Sure thing." I said, pausing to pull the sweater over my head so I could avoid carrying it. Normally, it would have fit me perfectly. But as Alecia Longbottom it was slightly baggy, and I rolled up the sleeves a little to keep them from covering my fingers. I followed Ginny down the steps, the trunk left in the hands of house elves.
"Now, don't do anything too crazy while I'm gone. Save all the rebellion stuff for later."
"I'll try my best." I hummed, smiling lightly as we made our down the halls. I nearly jumped out of my skin when people brushed by us, one hitting my shoulder rather roughly.
"Watch it, mudwhore."
"Piss off, asswipe!" I yelled after Theodore Nott, scowling as he walked away. Despite knowing who I was, he seemed perfectly content with annoying me at every turn. I wondered if it was solely because now he knew who I was. Draco seemed perfectly amused with it, saying that it was good character building for me. Though I knew, also, that if Nott ever took too sharp a turn, Draco would be the first to have my back and have his wand down Theo's throat. It was a pleasing thought.
"You two seem friendly." Ginny scoffed. "Isn't he friends with Thatcher?"
"Doesn't mean they're not both jerks." I hummed, rolling my eyes at the grin Ginny wore. Finally we made our way to the entrance, where students were saying goodbyes to friends and getting in line to go and board the Hogwarts express.
"Ah, I'll miss you." Ginny said, throwing her arms around my neck. I hugged her back tightly, taking it in for as long as I could. Months is what I would have to go through without this girl, and the thought killed me a little.
"I'll miss you too." I said, pulling away just as Neville approached. He hugged Ginny tightly, smiling sadly when they seperated. Ginny took a deep breath then, running her fingers through her hair.
"I'll say hi to everyone for you. I'm sure they'll like that." She said, grinning lightly. I smiled gratefully, nodding once.
"Caiden especially, if you see him."
"Of course." She said, jumping when Alecto called for students to line up in a nasty tone. Ginny gave us one last exasperated look before she bid a final goodbye, going to join Padma and Parvati Patil in line. Neville and I stood side-by-side then, and quietly I reached out and took his hand, holding it tightly.
"She's not coming back." I said quietly, watching as they left the room. "She's going into hiding with her family."
Neville grimaced. "I wish I could say I was surprised."
_
Christmas break was the next day, and I spent the majority of it in the library with Neville, talking and occasionally playing wizard's chess. We both sucked at the game, so it was pretty evenly matched. The Carrows were less likely to bother people in the library as well, which made it, while not quite a safe zone, somewhere peaceful.
"Check." Neville hummed, and I scowled at the board, ignoring the pieces as they shouted at me. Damnit. I moved my king, then turned back to the book I had found on dark magic. It appeared that, while any helpful books were forbidden, you could get ones on dark magic by the bucketful. They were interesting, if not slightly twisted. I had gotten sick earlier from reading about the horcruxe creation process.
"Checkmate."
"Damnit, Neville. I think your pieces are smarter." I scowled, ignoring the insults thrown at me by my own. He shrugged helplessly.
"Anyway, would mind fetching me more hot chocolate? The house elves are giving it out today."
"Only if you come with me."
"That ruins the point of you fetching it for me."
"We've been in here all day, you need to stretch your legs out a bit." He said, rising from his seat. I rolled my eyes but gave in, rising from my seat and closing my book under my arm. I followed him out of the room. We stayed silent as we made our way down the halls, figuring it better to draw the least attention. The kitchen was warm and steamy upon entering, and after checking in with a house elf we soon had mugs of hot chocolate in our hands.
"I was obsessed with this stuff when I was little." I hummed happily. Nevile smiled amusedly.
"I can picture that."
"Oh, shut it." I said, grinning when the kitchen door opened again. Except this time, it was two Slytherins who entered, one who I welcomed and one who made my skin crawl.
"Oh, if it isn't the mudwhore." Pansy Parkinson sneered as she caught sight of me. I scowled at her silently as she walked by, very aware of the fact that her hand was locked onto Thatcher's. Draco's.
"Just ignore her. We can't fight them now." Neville muttered sourly, glaring at both with equal measure. While he may know Thatcher was Draco now, I'm sure he didn't approve as either as a choice boyfriend for me. Not that it mattered when my boyfriend was holding hands with someone else.
Was I jealous?
Possibly.
But I would've been less so had the girl not been the rudest, most annoying bitch in the world.
"That's right, dumbass. You and your pitiful little kitties are completely useless. It's nice to be on top, isn't it Marcus?" Pansy said with a sly grin. Thatcher shrugged, leaning back against the counter. Every now and then his eyes would flick back to me with some interest, a glint that made my insides twist. The prat.
"I suppose so. I was never on the bottom though, unlike yourself." He said snidely, and I enjoyed the look of surprise that briefly passed over Pansy's face. Ha.
"I never implied-" Pansy began, before huffing and turning back to us, a sneeringly unpleasant smile on her face. "Well, I suppose it doesn't matter to you. You're not even on the bottom. You're unimportant. Untouchables. Filthy, stupid, blood traitors." She said, her shrill voice making me want to tear my ears off. She looked to Neville then, her voice honeyed. "You would know, wouldn't you, Longbottom? What with your parents- Invalids. Pathetic. I bet at the end of this war, you'll be just like them."
I was at a loss for words. I lunged forwards, fist clenched, but Neville pulled me back quickly, though his face too was flushed with anger. Even Thatcher's normally smooth expression seemed a little strained, and when his eyes met mine they were filled with apologies. I looked away, too preoccupied with being furious to be forgiving.
"If you ever speak like that to him again I'll charm your hands off!" I snapped, jerking my fist out of Neville's grip. Pansy stared at me, obviously taken aback. I normally didn't threaten people. I really didn't. But there was something about Pansy freaking Parksinon that made my temper explode.
And people wonder why I avoid her.
"Alecia, c'mon. She's not worth it." Neville said stiffly, and I knew I wasn't the only one having self control issues. I closed my eyes tightly, looking away from the witch and taking a deep breath. Yes, Alecia. Calm down. Breathe. Not the end of the world. I didn't need to end up chained to wall again, no way. I glanced up to see Thatcher staring at me, calm and collected. But with Pansy's back turned he nodded slightly towards the door, shrugging helplessly. There was nothing he could do. There was nothing any of us could do.
I was infuriated.
I picked up my hot chocolate, my book, and walked out, still fuming but at least not as murderous. Neville followed me out quickly, making sure the fruit painting shut behind us.
"I hate her!" I said. "I hate her so damn much!"
"I know. I do too." Neville said grimly as we walked, his grip tight on his mug. "But we can't act now. She'd report anything we do to the Carrows, and that won't end up fair. You're in enough trouble already. We both are. As aggravating as they can be-"
"I know, I know." I muttered sourly, reentering the library. "But she still sucks. And she's with my- Thatcher. She's with Thatcher. You know- What if she likes him?"
"So what if she does? I'm fairly certain he's preoccupied with someone else." Neville rolled his eyes as I fought to find a reason to continue to be angry. I scowled.
"She could try something on him though."
"Maybe. I'm sure he's just as apt to hex her as you are though. Let it rest, 'Lecia. Don't get yourself worked up. You trust the ferret, don't you?" Neville asked, staring at me pointedly as I sat down across from him. It was with a sigh that I nodded, my frown turning into a grimace. Of course I trusted Draco. With everything in me.
"Of course I do. It's just her-" I began, but Neville shook his head. Damn my friend for being so reasonable. He appeared sympathetic as he spoke, his smile small.
"Then trust him. And if he proves himself untrustworthy, in the end," Neville said, opening up a book that was beside him, "Then I get to hex him too."
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I love Neville. Hence why he's around so much in this chapter. I was really excited for this chapter because it shows a little more about normal lives. People can't just hide away in a bedroom forever. So this chapter showed a bit more to Lily and Neville's relationship, and Lily and Ginny's, and the way Draco and Lily have to be around each other when they're stuck under cover. The dynamics are really interesting and I have fun writing them. Poor kids though. Why can't they ever just be together?
Also, I understand somethings seem a little off canonically, but I swear- everything will come together in due time.
I apologize for such the long wait! I had camp, then I had post camp depression(which sucks, btw), then I had plans, then I was at another camp and I've been writing all week trying to get this up for you guys! Thank you so much for being patient, and please have mercy on any editing mistakes! I'm tryig my best for ya'll(I'm also juggling four other books at the moment. Yikes)
I'll definitely be updating the next chapter in a shorter time period.
Also, this upcoming fall, I'll probably begin publishing the Girl Marauder series! Let the excitement begin, people. It's gonna be great. A little more mature, a little more grown up, but I think you guys are going to really like it. It's the first fanfiction I ever wrote, so it means a lot to me, and I'm excited to share it with you!
As usual, feel free to fan, vote and comment. I always love to hear what you have to say!
Luv ya,
-Lily