I walked home from Ben's with my mind trying to settle my swirling emotions. From being people who were tentatively exploring friendship and trust we'd opened up and told each other all our secrets. It is not just difficult but downright risky to share secrets in this city. Since I left the protective shell of the cages I have come to realise that knowing too much about what's going down in Esperance is entirely bad for one's health. Ben's story reinforced the truth of that. I was very scared. That could be dealt with by the application of reason, at least up to a point. The problem with philosophy is that it works perfectly in the abstract but not always so well in practice. Especially when the practice involves the wholesale slaughter of members of the Elite on the orders of Malf Tesh Vik. That man has ruled Esperance as his own personal plaything for nearly eighty years. We have a City Governance Council but that consists of a few people who know that their health depends entirely on agreeing with whatever he says. Still as Ben said I was in no worse position than I had been before this evening and on the plus side I had made a friend. A real friend, someone I could trust. The first one I'd ever had and that made me immensely happy. I'd loved Hedd but I'd also been in awe of him as well. There was a huge difference in our ages. He was my lover and my mentor but I wouldn't have called him a friend. I couldn't imagine sitting over a beer with him cracking stupid jokes and taking the piss out of each other.
Normally I spend as little time in the Bureau as possible. Out of sight and out of Chief Tom's mind is a good policy as far as I'm concerned. This morning I got there a little before my normal time for logging on and went to where the duty rosters are posted. Neither Bardet nor Kone were listed but I was reassured to see Etz's name against 32 and 33. As far as I know he's been rostered to those levels as long as I've been assigned to 47 and 48. I logged on and spent my normal day patrolling. No major incidents. I prevented a couple of muggings and stopped a fight. Over the time I've been patrolling down here a sort of routine has been established. During daylight hours the central concourse, the four main spokes and the orbital route round the perimeter on both 47 and 48 are relatively free of trouble at least where I can see it. I walk figure of eight patterns and I don't vary my routine. That way everyone down here knows what's what and Chief Toms doesn't get the satisfaction of informing the relatives I don't have of my sad and untimely demise. I guess I am an Esperancer despite what Ben said. I don't take cuts and I don't actively join in the corruption and graft on which the City runs but I operate a kind of scratch my back policy with the criminal fraternity down here. It's usually only the idiots like Nico and his gang that run foul of me. The serious stuff goes on where I don't see it. So much for making citizens safer.
Ben was making something that smelled good when he opened the door to my knock. Mik, looking much better, was sitting at the table pushing his toy around and making funny noises which he informed me was Fant speak.
"I bought some beers. That smells good."
"Beers are always welcome. Don't get excited it's spaggle stir which is only marginally better than meeto stew. I just added a spice packet. It scorches the roof of your mouth enough that you don't notice the strange aftertaste. How was your day?"
"I was entirely circumspect and scuttled round in the shadows as instructed."
Ben grinned. "I'm glad to hear it. My day was enriched by two Hi-Mid jobs. I think Dom might be human after all. I made four cred in tips which means I can finally get new boots."
We ate, we played with Mik and after he'd gone to sleep we talked late into the night. Not about any of the crap that is Esperance but about ideas and beliefs and what the world had been like before the climate catastrophe. When people lived in a world where there was a system that upheld human rights and fairness. As Ben said it was just a pity they didn't believe in rights for ecosystems or we might all still be free. It's true. No-one in Esperance is really free. We call ourselves free citizens but anyone's citizenship can be revoked on the whim of a few powerful people. We are constantly told we are safe and secure but I wonder how many people truly believe that when they see fellow workers, neighbours or people they know hit the downward slide into debt and internship. Mik woke up just as I was thinking it was time for me to drag myself home. We played with him and then Ben started singing in an attempt to get him to go back to sleep which worked eventually.
In the end I stayed the night because by the time we'd settled Mik down again it was nearly 02.00. When I opened my eyes it took me a moment or two to process where I was. This is the first time since I left the Cages and moved in to my apartment that I haven't woken up in my own bed. I crawled to the edge of the sleeping platform. Ben was sitting on the couch with Mik showing him something in his book. I must have made a noise because Ben looked up and smiled. His smile made me think about things I shouldn't. Since Hedd died I've had sex with women. It means I can safely say I'm sexually active on my annual citizenship appraisal. I wondered if I would find a woman that I liked but I soon realised I'm not really attracted to the opposite sex and that, in a City where the penalties for same sex relationships are getting higher every year, is bad news. More application of Stoic philosophy will be needed with regard to not developing feelings for Ben. I'm not going to risk spoiling a friendship. At the end of the day that is more valuable than sex.
Once we'd had breakfast the first thing we did was go and buy boots for Ben. Not brand new boots but almost new from the recycle mart on 22. They cost twenty six creds which was two creds less than he had saved. He promptly spent four creds on a musical alphabet toy for Mik despite me pointing out that he was now worse rather than better off. He just laughed. I treated us to a drink and cake at a nice café. Unless you're rich and can afford the real food grown in the hydroponic units and the agristates, food is made out of algae or mycoproteins grown in vats to which colours and flavourings are added. Cake is one of the more successful incarnations. Everybody in Mid and LoCit is probably addicted to cake judging by the amount that's sold. Mik managed to eat three cakes which was probably two too many but he was enjoying them and it was good to see him smiling and laughing. After that we wandered round for a bit then took Mik to the World of the Seas. I was unprepared when half way through the show he suddenly asked
"Will Roni come back?" My eyes met Ben's. The truth is I don't think Roni will come back but I can't tell Mik that. He's six years old. Ben's voice cut across my panic
"What do you think about it Mik?"
"She wouldn't leave me on purpose."
"So she'd come back if she could?" He nodded "Well that's the important thing."
"But what if she comes back and can't find me?"
Ben bit his lip not sure what to say but I'd gathered my thoughts. "I'm a Forcer. I can make sure she knows you're staying with Ben."
"Slots." I relaxed thinking we'd got through a difficult situation until Mik frowned "I don't think she will though. I couldn't find any of the others."
"What do you mean?"
"I went to the gate every day. I was going to ask some of the regulars to go picking with them but none of them came for work. Maybe they took them all off to work on level 50 or the 'states." Mik is no fool. He's been waste picking with his sister since he was a toddler. He knows what life is like in Esperance especially for those at the bottom of the levels.
"We'll look after you. If Roni got taken to work down there she wouldn't be able to come and find you."
He nodded again "No-one gets out of there."
Mik was tired and fell asleep as soon as we got back. We talked for a bit about the conversation we'd had in the World of Seas. That's the first time Mik's mentioned his sister. We don't really know how much he understands about what happened but I think it's enough that he realises it was very serious. We ended up deciding that we needed to start teaching him to read and write. He's had no education but if we enrol him on the Educor vidfeed someone might ask questions. We've no claim to him and the City makes a profit out of orphans so he'd be taken away from us. We aren't going to let that happen. Ben got his xylophone out and played. I lay on the bed letting it wash over me. I like music. Listening to it takes me into another place. One that has nothing to do with life in Esperance. I feel the universe blossoming inside my skull and I love it. Ben plays beautifully. He should be doing that not running up and down the City for 20 creds a cycle plus any tips he can wangle. Mik woke up and was hungry so Ben stopped and put the instrument away. Once we'd eaten I said goodbye. I was reluctant to go but I couldn't stay for a second night. When I got home my room seemed cheerless and impersonal. I did my workout routine for an hour then had a shower. Normally I'd read but I couldn't since my book was now hidden at Ben's. I watched the rubbish on the free feeds for an hour without really paying any attention to it then I went to bed.
Work remained as it always had and the cycle slid past without incident except that towards the end of it the temperature outside the city started climbing. This was early in the year for a heatwave so I hoped it wasn't going to get too hot. My hopes were dashed. By Nineday it had reached 48C and the aircon was struggling to keep the city cool even in MidCit. It is always worse in the lower levels of LoCit since the aircon, like everything else down there, doesn't function well. It was a sweltering 42C and people were fractious and irritable. I broke up several fights on Nineday. One of them involved three old ladies who must have been pretty formidable fighters when they were younger judging by the way they were going at it. Apart from work I enjoyed the cycle. Every day as soon as I logged off I hurried home, changed and headed straight up to Ben's. We would eat and play with Mik until 20.00 hours. Then I would get him ready for bed while Ben got out and set up the xylophone. His neighbour went to work at 20.00 so there was no one to disturb with the noise. Ben encouraged Mik and I to learn some songs and sing them. A nonsense song that would help Mik learn his numbers, 'one, two pick up sticks' and so on. He loved it and always demanded we sing it through more than once. Ben told me I had a nice voice and should learn some of the other things he played. We settled Mik down at 21.30 and then I went home, worked out for an hour, showered and went to bed. Fear had receded to the background. There is no point worrying about what might or might not happen. We spent most of another hot Restday at World of the Seas. It was cool and anyway we loved watching the holopics of whales and the other creatures. Mik and I exchanged grown up glances at Ben's excited enthusiasm for the seahorses.
Oneday morning the temperature outside the City hit 50C. I was not looking forward to my day when I logged on. It got immediately worse when the duty officer on the desk told me Chief Toms wanted me in his office. I speculated my way to the chief's office and went in. I fixed my gaze on a point on the wall just above his head and stood to attention while he glowered at me.
"How did you do it Das?"
"Do what Sir?"
"Don't smart arse me. How did you get your citizenship score upgraded to 'above average'?"
That made me jerk my gaze down and make eye contact. "What? I don't know!"
"I'm not roked in the head so don't come the innocent with me. How did you do it?" The subtext here of course was that he continually ensured my score remained below average by reporting an unsatisfactory attitude to my duties. I couldn't enlighten him however because I was as mystified as he was. Instead I beamed at him
"I'm delighted and it is a credit to the Bureau when it's operatives are recognised as good citizens."
His scowl intensified "You don't give a fuck about the Bureau."
"That's not true Sir. I care a lot about upholding the principles on which the Bureau is founded." I might have overdone it since he turned purple.
"Fuck off out of my sight you scummy little pipe rat."
I fucked off.
By the end of the day my feet felt two sizes too big for my boots and my clothes were drenched in sweat. I felt entirely as bad tempered as everyone else down in the depths. I made my way up levels to 40. It wasn't noticeably cooler up there though it smelt better. I squelched my way into the Bureau to log off and the duty officer gave me a sarcastic salute
"Hello there Good Citizen Das. Had a rewarding day protecting the upstanding residents of 47 and 48?"
"What's it to you?"
He grinned "Your roster's been changed."
"What do you mean? The chief's moved me?"
"Yeah on to nights." He looked really happy.
My heart sank. "What levels?"
"Same as always Good Citizen Das, same as always. Report back at 22.00. You start tonight."
"Right." I logged off without saying anything else. Nights down there were going to be hell. This was Tom's retribution for the upgrade in my citizen score. I couldn't refuse. That would be grounds for him to summarily dismiss me. I buzzed Ben to tell him I couldn't come tonight. He answered on the first beep
"Hi. Are you melted? We've got ice in the chiller and some beer."
"I can't make it. I've been rostered on to to nights starting immediately. I'm still on 47 and 48 though."
"Rat crap and double rat crap. That's dire."
"You could say that. I'm going home to shower and contemplate my life expectancy. Tell Mik I'm sorry I won't see him tonight." There was a muffled discussion at the other end then Ben came back on.
"Mik wants to see you. The food's well on the way to being ready so we'll bring it down. At least that way you get something to eat without having to make it."
"That'd be great. No beer though. I'll get some juso if there's any left in the Omnimart."
They didn't stay long. Ben explained I needed to sleep but Mik was happy just to see me. It's clear he has anxieties about being left alone but that's hardly surprising. He's starting to call us Dad Ben and Dad Per and after a bit of discussion we decided he could call us what he likes. We're all he's got and in any case I can tell that Ben really likes it that Mik calls him Dad. As they left Ben gave me an admonitory look
"Remember you owe this City fuck all. It's taken me seven years to make a friend and I'm not inclined to lose him. So none of that Stoic crap about duty and living well. The first sniff of anything that looks like trouble you run. No sorting anything out."
I grinned. "I promise to stay out of trouble."
"Yeah well see that you do or otherwise I personally will kill you."
I shut the door and laughed then I lay down on the bed to snatch a couple of hours rest. Even with the aircon turned up full it was sticky and uncomfortable. I had a second shower before I left which cooled me down for precisely thirty seconds.
I made my way down to 47 fully determined to abide by my promise to Ben. I'd established a sort of system for my daytime patrols. I decided to use my ledlight to give advance notice of my approach. Hopefully once everyone had adjusted to the fact I was now patrolling at night something similar to the arrangement that held during the day would emerge. I'd get to stay alive and the business of the night would go on as usual. Anyone who existed down here and wasn't a criminal was holed up somewhere and not on the streets so I couldn't even pretend I was keeping anyone safe except myself. This was Tom's revenge for the upgrade to my citizen score plus I'd probably pushed him a bit farther than was wise. Perhaps I really should think about trying to get another job. The problem was I now carried the label 'Forcer' which added to the label 'Cage Fighter' put me in a certain bracket. No-one was going to employ me to do anything that required any intelligence and everyone would assume I was on the make.
I never got the chance to keep my promise to Ben. They were waiting for me on 47. Four of them wearing masks and wielding clubs. At first the odds weren't too bad. I had reach and cage fighting experience and they were slow and clumsy. I'd downed two of them when another two appeared from the shadows. I fought desperately and I almost got away. I got on to the upscaler but two more came running down from 46. That was it. I went down under the weight of numbers. Once they'd got me on the ground I was the recipient of a barrage of cudgel blows and kicks. My body jerked about like a rag doll. I gave up resisting and concentrated on curling up and protecting the most vital bits as best I could. I was on the edge of fading out when the onslaught stopped. I lay there unable to move. A voice said
"Haul him up boys." I was dragged to my feet and held upright. If they'd let go I'd have fallen over. I squinted at the man in front of me. He was no lower level criminal. Smartly dressed and groomed but with a mask concealing the top half of his face. A fixer. He gestured and one of the thugs removed my helmet and chucked it on the ground. "We tolerate you prancing about during the day but this is overstepping the line. Consider this a friendly warning. Come down here again at night and the warning won't be friendly." He took hold of my chin and squeezed my jaw. I stared at him. I couldn't avoid it. One of the thugs had my head in a lock. "Old man Hedd's fancy boy turned forcer. You understand what I'm saying Apollo?" I nodded. I had no desire to be heroic I just wanted to survive. He let go of me "You should have stayed in the cages with the rest of the disgusting sprags. Glitter and body oil and quivering pecs. I bet you miss the old man's cock up your arse." he laughed without humour. I just hung there trying not to lose my supper. He gestured and I felt them undoing my uniform trousers and pulling them down. I struggled but it made no difference. I heard the swish and then agony bloomed between my legs and blackness overtook me.
Consciousness returned and with it the pain. I hurt all over and between my legs was a throbbing agony. I was lying on my back on the concourse on 46. My trousers were still round my knees but they'd put the helmet over my genitals. I could never come back even on a daytime patrol. I'd lost all authority. I'd been humiliated. The symbolism of moving me off the levels that had been my patch. The removal of my trousers and the administering of one of the punishments used by the authorities to degrade and discipline men caught having a same sex relationship. Then the final touch of leaving my helmet on my cock. I rolled over and threw up. There were a few people about but no one would help me. Strictly eyes averted. I pressed my pcoms and called Ben. When he answered his voice was groggy with sleep.
"Per?"
"You might want to kill me now."
"What?" his voice sharpened "What's happened?"
"I got a friendly warning."
"Where are you?"
"On the concourse on 46."
"Don't move I'm on my way."
"I don't think I can move." but he'd already cut the connection. I simply lay there half conscious until a hand brushed over my face
"Per? Per are you all right? Speak to me." I opened my eyes and Ben's face was hovering just above mine.
"Sorry. I, thanks." I shut my eyes because tears threatened to spill down my cheeks and I was damned if they were going to know I'd been taken away in tears. Ben helped me to kneel up. He got my trousers back on somehow. He put my helmet on my head. Then he hauled my arm over his shoulder and half dragged, half carried me to the scaler.
"I need to log off duty."
"Fuck that I'm taking you home."
"No I have to otherwise they can summarily dismiss me."
"Rat crap. Slots." When we got to 42 he deposited me on the ground and shot into the Farma. He came back with an energy drink and some pain killers.
"Take two." I swallowed them down and we sat for a few minutes until their effect kicked in. Ben was regarding me anxiously.
"Thank you. I think I can just about manage to walk in and log off."
"I'll come with you."
"No wait outside. This was a set up. I didn't even start patrolling. They were waiting for me. Best no-one sees you."
I logged off. Registered the attack and stated my injuries required a sick day. The duty officer barely acknowledged me as she took the chit. I staggered out and Ben grabbed me and hauled me along the spoke to the concourse. He muttered about taking the vator all the way to 29 and I shook my head.
"No my place first. Get out of my uniform." The uniform trousers have a built in box to prevent the sort of damage that had been inflicted on me. I was swelling up and the box was rubbing and cutting into me. By the time we got to my room the pain between my legs was becoming unbearable. As soon as the door was shut Ben undid my trousers and pushed them down. I simply leant on him and concentrated on not throwing up. He helped me over to the bed and lowered me down. I fumbled with my uniform tunic while he removed my boots and trousers.
"Spire shite Per that's bad." He helped me lie down then opened my chiller and scraped some ice off the side. He wrapped it in my wash cloth and came back and placed it on my genitals. He sat on the bed and held my hand while I whimpered. He regarded me with worry etched all over his face. "From your neck to your knees you are covered in big red blotches that are going to be very bad bruises. I don't need to tell you what state your equipment is in but it's the sort of damage that could have you singing soprano. Do we need to go to the Emergency Treatment Centre?"
"No. Nothing's broken and bruises are painful but they heal."
He looked sceptical "And...?"
"It's bruised like my ego but it'll recover."
"If that was a friendly warning then I don't want to know what they consider a serious one would be." He raised his eyebrows "Tell me what happened."
Half way through he got up and renewed the cold compress. Then he sat on the bed next to me. I curled up and put my head in his lap while I told him the rest. When I finished he simply said
"The real question is where that upgrade came from."
I nodded. I had no idea who or why but it had set a wholly unpleasant train of events in motion. Chief Tom's had left me to my own devices for two and a half years. A pattern had been set that could have continued indefinitely. The fact that it had been abruptly disturbed just after the special duty was an uncomfortable thought.
"You have to resign from the CSB. I don't think you've got a choice. From what you told me if you refuse the duty they'll summarily dismiss you. If you don't those bastards will probably kill you." he stopped "I don't think I could bear that."
We lapsed into silence. The cold compress was helping and I shut my eyes. After a bit Ben stroked my hair very gently. I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He smiled apologetically
"I hate to ask but do you think you're up to making it to my place? It's just I told Mik you'd had an accident and I was going to fetch you home. He wanted to come and I promised him we wouldn't be long."
I sat up gingerly. "I can manage. It was mostly the trousers. I'm sore but mobile. Mik must be worrying."
Ben fetched me a T and shorts and while I dressed slowly and carefully he collected my wash things and a spare set of clothes. He gave me my sandals and we made our way slowly up to 29.