Sorry kung maiksi ang update ah? ^_^ Thanks for all the comments!
--
*Toby*
Umiiyak na naman sya. Haaay... kelan ba matatapos 'to? Hanggang kelan kami magdudusa para lang sa entertainment ng Author na yan?
"Corrine..."
"Toby..." She muffled her cries as she reached for me. Tinabihan ko sya at niyakap. Even though I don't feel anything towards her other than pity and friendship is all I can give, I still want to comfort her. I want to punch Rico in the face for being so... gay.
Babae lang ang may karapatang maging fickle. That's one of the few things that fascinates me about them. But him? What's his right to be fickle?
Akala ko ba si Gale ang gusto nya? Eh bakit kay Femi naman sya lapit ng lapit?
"Ang tanga-tanga ko Toby!"
"Ano ka ba! Hindi mo naman kasalanan—"
"No! It's all my fault! I let her have him!" She said then cried some more.
"What do you mean?" So... hindi ginusto ni Rico ang lahat ng 'to? Aish. Ang gulo...
She sniffed saka nagpahid ng luha. "Kase... I gave her a chance. I asked Rico to give her a chance as well. Tell me Toby... bakit ang tanga-tanga ko?"
"Bakit nga ang tanga mo? Aish. If you know you'd get hurt by doing so... bakit ginawa mo pa rin? Tapos ngayon iiyak-iyak ka!"
"Eh hindi mo naman kase naiintindihan eh! Best friend ko si Femi!"
Potek. Best friend.... pinakaayaw kong salita sa mundo. Nagkandaleche-leche buhay ko dahil dya.
"Dapat bago ka gumawa ng isang desisyon, pinag-iisipan mo munang mabuti 'cause once it's done, there's no going back. You have no choice but to stand by it no matter how much it's hurting you."
Like me...
I chose to let her go... kase alam kong walang patutunguhan yun. Oo nga't nahihirapan ako pero kapag ikinulong ko sya sa 'kin... sya naman ang masasaktan.
Haaay...
Ang hirap umibig. Ayoko na! Nakakasakit ng ulo. Nakakawala ng bait. Nakakasira ng pagkatao.
Yan ang mga bagay na natutunan ko nung nagmahal ako. Sabi pa nila sa 'kin dati, sabihin ko na daw... kase baka all along... yun din yung nararamdaman nya para sa 'kin. I believed in all those stories and movies na nagkakatuluyan ang mag-best friend.
Hindi pala sa lahat ng pagkakataon ganun ang nangyayari.
If only I tried to love this girl beside me. If only I gave her a chance to change my mind. Who knows right? She might not be crying right now. And I might be happier than I am now.
But it was just too late.
She moved on. And she was hurting. And she was crying beside me... who was also hurting.
"If only it was that easy..."
"Right," I agreed.
"Toby..."
"Hmm..."
"Don't leave me here okay?"
I shushed her. "Oo. Nandito lang ako."
*Jazz*
Ako si Jasmine. Siguro yung iba sa inyo, nakalimutan na ako. Ang totoo nya, display lang ako sa story na 'to. Hindi ako kasali. Pader ako. PADER!!!
Hindi ko alam kung masasaktan ba ako o magiging thankful kay Author. You see guys, no matter how much I want to be with Rico, ramdam ko na hindi talaga ako ang para sa kanya. Ang masama pa dun, wala akong mapaglabasan ng sama ng loob.
Si Toby kase... Haaay...
Parang kapag pinili ko sya, package deal dapat. Either it's friendship and love or nothing. And I don't really love him that way. Believe me... I tried but to no avail. Ako kase yung tao na kapag walang initial attraction towards the other person, I won't even give them a chance to prove me wrong.
That's just me. And what I feel for Toby is just.... it was just plain friendship. I know maraming inis sa babaeng katulad ko. Pero masisi nyo ba ako kung wala talaga akong maramdaman? Alangan namang magpretend ako di ba?
So yeah, I just wanna share that and hope that people understand. Not all feelings can be changed to what people's expectations are. Not all love lasts. Not all friendships bloom into something else. Not all ends in happily-ever-after.
Sometimes it's just hurt, hurt and hurt still.
That's the reality of it people. Deal with it.
*Gale*
Shucks! Ang ganda kong tanga! Bakit ba kase nabiyayaan kaming magkakapatid ng katangahan sa pag-ibig? Well, kuya and I. I hope Chuck does too. Aba hindi pwedeng kami lang ni kuya! Hehe.... sorry brother.
"Toby... I think I'll just go to my room."
"Okay. Samahan kita?" He offered. Lately, he's being so nice to me. At nagpapasalamat ako dun. Dahil sa kanya, medyo gumagaan ang pakiramdam ko.
I shook my head. "Kaya ko naman mag-isa."
"Sige."
I stood up and walked to my room.
--
I was about to open the door when somebody grabbed me by the arm. I didn't see who it was dahil sa bilis ng mga pangyayare, narinig ko na lang na may nagsarang pinto at nag-click yung lock.
My heart hammered against my chest when I saw that I'm in someone else's room.
Napasandal ako bigla sa pinto when two powerful hands slammed against the spaces on either side of my face. Napapikit ako. And then he spoke and my eyes flew open.
"I can't take this anymore."
A fraction of a moment flew by and then I felt his lips against mine. I tasted longing, passion and hunger. At gumanti ako with the same intensity. He groaned and pulled me by the waist. I clung to his neck, fearing that if I don't, my knees would give away, for they were suddenly weakened by his kiss.
"R-Rico—" I was already gasping for air when I spoke his name.
He silenced me with another kiss. I wanted to cry that moment. Raw emotions were evoked by the mingling of our lips. It's not the kiss itself but the emotion behind it. It was like both of us are dying and we need each other's breath to survive.
"I love you..." He whispered against my lips.
"I—" And then I froze. I heard it. Her voice.
He swore silently. At napatingin na lang ako sa kanya. His brows are sweaty. His eyes at haze. I saw my reflection in them. I have the same look. I wanted to get lost in that feeling again. And I guessed that he felt the same way because he stooped down and was about to kiss me once more.
My heart almost drop when I heard a knock.
"Rico nandyan ka ba?" I heard Femi's voice. Bahagya kong naitulak si Rico. I was agitated. Sobrang kaba ko. I don't want Femi to find me here. I mean, what will she think of me? Damn this! I feel like I'm coveting someone's husband!
I heard something inside my brain chuckle as if it's agreeing that what I'm thinking is ridiculous. Like hello! Sino ba ang nagmamahalan dito di ba? Kami yun ni Rico di ba? Panira lang naman yang si Femi eh...
But still... I never felt this guilty in my life.
"I have to go," I said to him, barely audible even to my own ears.
Bigla nya akong hinila at niyakap. "Please don't," he whispered in my ear. Napapikit na lang ako. Akala ba nya gusto ko 'tong ginagawa ko?
"Sorry..."
Humugot sya ng malallim na hininga. And I felt his pain on that. It's as if he's letting it out through air. The pain... that is.
He let me go and I hid beside the door. He gripped the knob tight, his knuckles turning white. Then he looked at me and I nodded. He turned the knob and opened the door.
"Hi!" I heard her bouyant voice.
"Hello." He replied, his mouth twitched. Nakita kong dere-derecho si Femi na pumasok ng kwarto nya. When her back was turned, I took the opportunity to sneak outside and tiptoed all the way to my room.
Mygosh! Ang hirap! Parang lumalabas na ako yung adulterer!
*Femi*
There's no doubt about it. Gale was here. Sa reaction pa lang ng mukha ni Rico, alam ko na. But I brushed that off. Hindi ako dapat panghinaan ng loob. Kapag sumuko ako agad, walang mangyayari sa 'kin.
"Kanina pa kita hinahanap eh. Nandito ka lang pala," I said, looking straight to his eyes.
"Yeah," was his curt reply. Kumawit ako sa batok nya and pulled his head down. Tama nga ako... Gale was here. Her stench lingers on him.
I wanted so bad to erase her from his thoughts. I wanted him to gurgle one bottle of Listerine so that he'll get rid of her taste on his mouth. But for now this will do. Kung hindi ko sya mabura sa mga labi nya, handa akong palitan yun ng mga bagong alaala.
My heart rejoiced as I felt his lips on mine. Yes Femi... you are so close to getting him.
Pero latak na lang ang nakukuha mo. Hindi ka na nya mamahalin ng buo.
I want to slap that little voice inside my head.