As if the situation didn't call for enough going wrong at the time, it started to rain, and James started to panic as the same set of feelings were burrowing themselves into his chest. It was the same sickly feeling of being useless during a time where someone needed him the most. Right now, he was looking at Renata, who was failing to wake up after her blood phobia had caught her at the worst time. It didn't cross his mind at any point that there was potential that there would be blood at a match, even though he had witnessed plenty of similar scenarios over the course of time when he played.
Getting hit with a bludger was never like getting hit with a pillow and being the self-proclaimed Quidditch enthusiast that he was, James knew, he should have known better. He should have known to at least give Renata a warning that there was potential that she could witness spilt blood. It was a sport that relied on the idea of Beaters striking the opponents out of the sky in hopes of bettering the chances for their team to score and find the Golden Snitch. Why he didn't think of it beforehand, he figured he was far too caught up in the excitement of the match.
It was the same thing that had got him in trouble in the first place, the reason he had lost Lily. He would get caught up in an idea or an event, and due to that, he never thought something through completely. When he looked back at the situation with Lily, he realised that he could have contacted Dumbledore so many different ways besides actually leaving the home. He had left his family exposed to all the horrors that occurred that evening and he hadn't even been around to try and help.
Now with Renata, he should have been mindful of her phobia, after all, she was mindful of everything in the household to make sure things didn't go wrong. He didn't think to warn her and even at that moment as he had her sitting up in his arms, he felt completely useless because he didn't know what to do. People around them, including Remus, seemed to be trying different methods but nothing was working. No one around him knew what was going on in his head, but they could read the fear on his face.
But it was simply because the way he was holding Renata's body was the same way he had held Lily's body when he found her on the floor of their home after Severus Snape departed in a rush. He was trying not to think of such a thing, after all, Renata wasn't dead, she was just unconscious, but he was praying that she would wake up sooner rather than later. As he had jumped to conclusions as to why Renata's parents, specifically her mother, hadn't let Renata attend Quidditch games, he was beginning to think that he had probably jumped to a reason that wasn't the case at all.
He had painted a picture of her parents being controlling in so many aspects but perhaps he didn't understand that maybe they were trying to protect their daughter. Maybe they had anticipated something like this happening so they never allowed her to attend matches, in fear that she would get hurt. Thankfully, he hadn't voiced such things because then he really would have looked like a royal arse.
Yet, while James felt like he had been reaching with his thoughts, perhaps he wasn't as far off from uncovering the truth. A truth that even Renata wasn't even aware of, even though it involved her own actual life.
Despite not waking up in the Quidditch stands with James calling her name, Renata had not entered a state of darkness that one would probably have associated with fainting. Instead, as soon as she had slipped back, she found herself sitting in an all-too-familiar classroom. The problem was, the classroom itself was not one associated with a school, but one that could be found in her own home back at her parents' house. She could distinctly tell by the sickly yellow walls that were decorated with the writing of spells and all sorts of teachings. There were all sorts of books, but never ones with the sole purpose of entertainment, they were all educational textbooks.
There were no windows in the classroom as Renata distinctly remembered because the outside was just far too distracting during lessons. It was only illuminated by the lanterns that were in the room and the small fireplace during the colder months when it was actually lit. In the centre of the room were the two desks that Renata was all too familiar with. It was where she and Adelmo would spend hours during the summer holidays studying and working. Throughout the days it always rotated who their teacher was, depending on their mother's and father's schedules. Normally though, it was their mother that would give them their daily lessons and be around in case they had any questions.
She told them far too often that over the summer that students grew too lazy and by the time they returned to school, they had practically forgotten everything they had been taught during the year. She didn't want that for Renata and Adelmo, she wanted them to be used to the school environment and she always wanted them to be better. However, as Renata stood in the classroom, despite the roaring fire off the side, she suddenly felt incredibly chilled to the bone.
The sound of footsteps approaching the room sounded and she turned her head, only to see her mother walk in.
"Renata! Adelmo!"
Renata watched as she walked in, looking around the room before she pursed her lips together, clearly seeing that neither one of them were in the classroom. Renata remembered often times that she and Adelmo would sneak off to play and that usually caused plenty of disappointment in the eyes of their parents. They wanted their children to be successful, but sometimes Renata and Adelmo were overpowered by the want of playing. It only seemed natural as they were only children at the time, but it wasn't considered the norm in their household.
Often times their parents told them from the very beginning that they were not normal children, they were exceptional, they were to rise high above others. But in order to do so, they had to stay committed, no matter how younger they were or how tempted they were by other things. Straying off the path meant that they weren't going to be successful and unfortunately, Renata had fooled herself to believe that she had strayed from the path far too many times and that's why she had missed out on her chance of becoming an Auror.
Listening to her mother call their names sent the hairs on the back of Renata's neck to stand straight up, goosebumps lingering all over her skin. Her mother didn't look happy at all, in fact, she looked extremely annoyed, especially as she heard the sounds of a young Renata and Adelmo racing towards the classroom, their laughter echoing in the hallway.
As Renata witnessed a younger version of herself and Adelmo appear at the door, she saw the smiles instantly fade as they started apologising profusely. Her stomach turned just seeing the fear on their faces because she knew they were in trouble for running off when they were supposed to be working. Watching as her mother took a step towards them in a scolding tone, Renata was suddenly blinded by a bright white light that caused her to screech. But if that wasn't bad enough, it was followed by such a splitting pain in her head that she continued to scream in agony.
Her hands gripped the sides of her head, as she tried to back away, thinking that was going to help stop it. Of course, it didn't, the only thing that stopped the pain was actually waking up and as she forced her eyes opened, she no longer found herself in the childhood classroom or in the Quidditch stands, she was in hospital.
"Oh no," she groaned as she spotted the Healer making his way towards her. That was probably not the reaction he was hoping for or expecting, considering he was the one helping her after she had been brought in.
"Well then," he began in a slight tone, " I thought you would be happier to see me, most people are."
The Healer was not Adelmo as he was probably twice her brother's age, placing him in his fifties at the very least. He was balding as he was sporting quite the combover, and he was incredibly short as Renata came to notice right away as she sat up in the bed. If she had been standing at her full height, she would place him coming up to her lowest rib. But what he lacked in height, he seemed to make up in muscle as he was quite stout and bulky at the same time. Needless to say, just looking at him distracted her from the situation at hand.
That was until he started snapping his fingers in her face to get her to stop staring at him and actually focus.
"Ms Abate, are you aware of the reason as to why you fainted?" he questioned her, not bothering with an introduction as he already seemed quite annoyed.
"Uh, yes, Sir," she answered, " I have a bit of a blood phobia, I was attending a Quidditch match and one of the players was hit with a bludger. There was blood everywhere-"
She had to stop herself for a moment, covering her mouth for a second as she felt sick to her stomach just discussing the scene she had witnessed. Within seconds, she found a glass of water in her face, leaving her to take it and just focus on it so she could think of something else. And her thoughts did travel, but it wasn't the concern for herself, but for the company she had been with. The last thing Renata remembered was pushing Harry away from her and into James' arms so that he didn't fall when she did.
"Is everyone else alright?" she asked quickly. "Mr Potter and Harry, are they-"
"Ms Abate," the Healer spoke to her in a bewildered tone, "you hit your head after you fell, your concern should be-"
"Are they alright?" Her tone was much firmer as she asked him again, her eyes narrowed slightly. It was enough for her to get her point across that the Healer felt as though he really didn't have a choice but to answer her first.
"Yes, your husband and your son are just fine," he said, giving her an odd look that she had addressed her own husband as Mr Potter. What kind of household were they living in?
"Oh no," she shook her head quickly, " they're not my-"
"SWEETHEART!"
The sudden burst of James and Harry making their entrance into the area caused The Healer to sigh and throw his hands up in the air in frustration. He muttered about someone else coming in to check her vitals but he wasn't going to stand there and deal with a circus.
Renata looked beyond confused as she was addressed as "sweetheart" and thankfully, she was sitting in the bed or she probably would have fallen right over again. She had to assume that she was dreaming, no other reasonable explanation as to why James had greeted her as "sweetheart" as it didn't even sound playful.
He walked over with Harry in one of his arms and reached a hand out to smooth over Renata's hair in a loving manner. Yes, she had to be dreaming, otherwise, she was probably dead and this was her own personal version of heaven. The Healer gave the couple one last look over his shoulder before he shook his head and walked out. And as soon as the door was closed, James' hand dropped down to his side and he sat beside her on the bed.
"Sorry," he told her right away, " I didn't mean to make things weird, but they weren't going to let us see you if we weren't immediate family or if we weren't married. So, um, I might have told the Healers that we were married."
There were a few stolen seconds where Renata and James looked at each other, the nerves radiating off of James' features as he feared that she was going to be upset with his lie. But he had done it out of panic, as they weren't even in St Mungo's at the time. At an unfamiliar hospital, he figured it was the best bet, she could be upset with him afterwards. And even though he had a harder time reading her emotions, Renata knew she was feeling the sting of disappointment coursing through her body.
Of course, marriage was beyond far off even in her dream world, but she did like the idea of being called sweetheart, especially by him. He said it with such a natural tone that she couldn't help but believe it. But it turned out it wasn't a dream nor had she had died and gone to heaven, it was just a temporary fix to a bizarre situation. Yet, she couldn't tell him that, she could only imagine the embarrassment she would put herself in if she dared to tell him that she wasn't bothered at all by the idea of being called such an endearing thing.
"No need to be sorry, Mr Potter," she said with a small smile, "it was an act of quick thinking. Although I guess it was timing when you came in, I almost told him that I wasn't."
James wore a crooked grin looking all too proud of himself at her compliment. "Well, even if you exposed the truth, we probably would have figured something out. You should have seen their faces when I told them that we were married and they asked why you didn't share the last name with me. Eh, I told them it was your choice and you didn't like the sound of Renata Potter."
She let out a small laugh, ignoring the tingling sensation that washed over her at the mention of "Renata Potter." She was going to end up losing her mind in hospital if James didn't stop soon.
"Is Remus alright?" Renata asked, attempting to change the subject. "Is he here-"
"He's in the waiting corridor," James explained, " we couldn't come up with a fast enough lie on the spot for him. But he agreed to wait there. However, Renata, you should be concerned about yourself. We should be asking you if you're alright, not the other way around."
The concern in his voice was beyond tempting and as he sat beside her, his hand had drifted over hers by accident or at least, that's what she was telling herself as she could feel the warmth emitting from his palm.
"I'm fine," she said after a hard swallow, " I should have known better with the bludgers that there was the chance of it happening. I completely neglected that and I guess I paid the price for it. But I am so sorry, I didn't want to ruin the experience for you, Harry, and Remus-"
"You didn't ruin anything!" James insisted. "I don't even know how you could think that. I should have been aware of it too but it was just an accident, Renata, they tend to happen to everyone. But you can't blame yourself, you don't have control over this phobia."
He was right, she thought to herself, she didn't have control over her phobia and as she thought about it, that was a dangerous situation. Could she really be the nanny or the help for James and Harry if she ran such a risk with her own body and mind? Suppose it had just been her and Harry at the Quidditch match and she had passed out, then what? Where would that have left Harry?
Looking down at the little sleeping Harry that was resting against his father's chest, Renata gave a light shake of her head, remembering how she had pushed him away at the last second. Harry probably didn't understand why she had done that and she had probably scared him when she collapsed to the ground in the stands. He really didn't need something like that in his life, did he?
"Harry's going to be happy to see that you're alright when he wakes up," James said as he had followed her gaze, " he kept calling for you once we got here. Of course, at one point, I think he was doing it because the mediwitches kept giving him sweets because they felt bad for him. Little bugger, his pockets are loaded with sweets right-"
"Mr Potter," Renata quickly interrupted him, " I don't think it's a good idea if I continue to work for you or if I continue to be Harry's nanny."
The bluntness of her statement nearly caused James to fall off the bed, but luckily, he remembered he had Harry in his arm as he steadied himself. However, the shock of what she had said to him didn't vanish right away, instead, he was left with his lips parted and his eyes wide as he stared at her in disbelief.
"Wh-what? But-"
"Today was just an indicator that my issue with blood could lead to a harmful situation," she said quietly. "Truly, it's nothing against you or Harry, I love working with the both of you-"
"Then stay!"
The desperation in his tone was slightly overpowering as his voice cracked near the end. He didn't want to even think about Renata leaving, she couldn't leave them.
"But Mr Potter-"
"You've been in our lives for months now," he said, not giving her a chance to speak at the time, " and you've been so incredibly helpful. This was just one incident, Renata, you can't leave because of it. You're helping us and if you need it, we'll help you. I'll get you whatever help you need as long as you stay, please."
She was just about to say something to him but meeting his gaze, she couldn't even bring herself to reject his proposal of help. Of course, it wasn't like she wanted to leave, she just thought it would be best because she feared any further incidences. However, James didn't seem concerned about that, he just seemed more occupied with the idea of her staying with him.
He wanted her to stay and if she was being honest with herself, she wanted to stay too.
Behind him, a Healer entered the room to finally check in on them, a smile on her face as she spotted the scene of the small family sitting together. Renata remembered that she was supposed to be playing as James' wife at the time, so she placed a small smile on her own face before she looked back at him.
"Alright, James.I'll stay. "