"Hey, uncle. I've realized that you've done so much for me, so it's only right for me to help you out. I sincerely apologize for being disloyal," Eli told Xavier over the phone.
"What are you saying, my boy?" Xavier exhaled.
Eli looked at me through the rearview mirror, "I've knocked out Valerie, she's sat in my car and I'm coming to deliver her to you now."
Xavier sighed, "What is that going to do? Andrea wants Nathaniel, not his daughter."
"You know just as well as I do that Nathaniel would burn the world if it means he finds his daughter and keeps her safe. This time, you won't be taken off of guard, you will keep Valerie with you at all times and wait for her father to plead for her freedom."
"You know what? That doesn't sound so bad, let me just ask Andrea to make sure she agrees."
I rolled my eyes, the poor man was whipped like a lost puppy.
Andrea was put onto the phone, "Listen here, Elijah. If this is another prank of yours, I swear to god that I will blow Valerie's brains out in front of you. Got it?"
Eli nodded, but then realized Andrea couldn't see him, "I understand. I promise that this is not another prank."
The call ended.
Eli turned to us, smirking, "It's not a prank, it's an ingenious betrayal."
I rolled my eyes, "Eyes on the road, bucko."
Eli sent me a playful glare through the rearview mirror.
I stuck my tongue out at him, but silently prayed that my plan would work.
"I ship it," Riley whispered.
I playfully shoved her, when I told her we were dating she would be even happier than I was.
"I've been trying to come up with a ship name. So far all I've got are Valijah, Veli and Valeli."
I laughed, "Those all sound like diseases."
"Exactly! That's because your love is contagious towards one another. It makes me sick just looking at how mushy and gushy you guys are."
Why was everyone around me a master of puns?
We had been driving for thirty minutes and it was almost time to begin putting my plan into action. My plan relied heavily on timing and one truckload of luck.
"I feel like we're the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, out on a mission to save the lives of our forefathers," Riley randomly blurted out.
"Are you calling us green?" Eli laughed, "I mean, yeah Val here does look quite green because of all the avocados she's consumed, but the rest of us? Not so much."
I flipped Eli off.
"Val, don't stick up your middle finger," Dad scolded, "I've taught you better."
I folded my arms, "But he's being a prick."
Dad shook his head, "Nah, he's right. I think if you ate anymore, you'd turn into Shrek."
Eli raised his hand up and Dad gave him a high-five.
If this was how my boyfriend planned to bond with my father, I wanted to drown. Xavier? You there? Okay no, just kidding. I want to live.
The rest of the ride consisted of Riley, Eli and Dad insulting me. Oh, what fun.
Eli stopped the car the same place he had done the last time he and I had been here.
I passed Riley the timer it read, 20:56:07.
We could do this.
Dad and Riley hopped into the trunk of Dad's car. Since it was a Tesla Model S, there was quite a bit of room in the trunk for them to sit comfortably with all of our bags. I sat shotgun. Eli had packed a roll of duct tape, which he pulled out and began to wrap around my arms and my mouth.
I looked like I'd been abducted and because Eli was horrible at taping, I looked like a mummy who had fallen into a pile of grey paint and hadn't finished getting wrapped. Eli looked around in the car before placing a kiss onto my lips through the duct tape. I rolled my eyes.
I sat back in the seat and Eli buckled the seatbelt.
Then, I played dead.
➸
I cracked my eyes open as slightly as I could, and watched Xavier greet Elijah with an embrace. Eli opened up my door and unbuckled my belt. He lifted me into his arms and I had to really put my acting skills into action. I went limp and left my mouth ajar for good measure.
"You didn't kill her, did you?" Xavier chuckled.
Elijah laughed, "Of course not, Uncle."
Xavier laughed again.
What was so funny? Huh, Xavier? Please share. We could all use a laugh.
I felt someone's rigid fingertips graze my cheek, "She looks so peaceful when she's unconscious and not trying to kill someone."
I wanted to bite Xavier's fingers off.
I'd show him peaceful.
"I agree. Otherwise, she always looks like she's ready to throw an avocado at someone," Eli joked along.
I internally rolled my eyes.
"All right, let's bring her inside, to Andrea," Xavier told Eli.
I didn't risk peeking through my eyelids, everything had to go as planned or else the whole thing would flop. I felt Eli carry me through what I assumed would be the front door. Eli had to adjust his grip on me frequently so that I wouldn't fall.
I wasn't even that much of a potato, he just needed to hit the gym more.
My weak little boyfriend.
It felt great not having to walk around to get to places. When this was all over, and I wasn't afraid that I was going to be killed, I would bribe Eli into becoming my personal camel, so that he could carry me from one end of my couch to the other. I would never have to walk again.
"Elijah? My beautiful nephew! I haven't seen you in years!" Andrea shrieked.
Actually, you lunatic, you saw him no more than twenty-four hours ago. Please go and get yourself a clock.
I tried not to grimace as Andrea rushed forward wrapping her arms around Eli's neck and kissing both of his cheeks sloppily. She didn't seem to notice that I, a living human being, was being suffocated beneath whatever branded clothing she had on.
Heartless loon.
"Oh, look who we have here! My lovely little Valerie," Andrea cooed, pulling away from Eli and squeezing my cheeks.
What was with psychotic people and touching my face? They were the reason my skin broke out. They were the reason none of the skin remedies ever worked. Disgusting fingers.
Andrea thankfully stopped touching my face, "Elijah, darling, take Valerie to your room until she wakes up and then bring her down immediately because we have much to discuss."
"Yes, ma'am."
"Oh, and get her something else to wear, she looks quite homeless."
Thanks, psycho. I'll add that to the expanding list of reasons I want to kill you.
Soon enough, I felt Eli carry me up the staircase. He seemed to be struggling.
"What did you eat, Buttercup? Bricks with a bit of avocado?" Elijah whispered trying to hold in his laugh.
I opened my eyes cautiously before I punched his chest as best as I could with my hands still duct taped.
Eli purposefully, bumped my head into the wall, like four times, knowing I wouldn't be allowed to yelp. I glared up at him.
Just wait for the smack at the back of your head.
Eli chuckled softly before kicking his bedroom door open. He placed me on his bed, "The coast is clear, you can come back to life now."
I opened my eyes and sat up on the bed. Eli peeled the duct tape off of my hands allowing me to remove the strip that was on my mouth.
"You're an ass, you know that?" I whispered trying to suppress a smile.
"Yeah," Eli nodded, "a badass."
I smacked the back of his head, four times.
"Buttercup, if you keep whacking my head, I don't think I'll have any braincells left to follow through with you amazing plan."
I rolled my eyes and fell back onto his bed, "Why did I agree to us dating?"
Eli copied my actions and turned over to look at me, "Because you are helplessly in love with me and I wouldn't want to break your heart so I agreed to date you."
"But you asked me out-"
"-No Sweetheart, we don't need to talk about the past, we need to think about the future."
"You're such a dork," I laughed.
Eli lay beside me, "Well, we have like an hour to kill before we have to go back down to Andrea. What do you want to do?"
"I want to change my clothes, I feel like crap."
"Andrea was right, you do look homeless."
I flipped him off before getting off of his bed and pulling open his closet.
"Yeah sure, Val, honey, just open my closet, make yourself at home," Eli commented, placing his arms behind his head and lying down, "While you're at it, just go through my secret diary too. It's pink and has all my secrets in it."
"Thanks, babe," I mocked sending him an air-kiss.
"I don't want your air-kisses, come over here and give me a real one."
"No, I only want to kiss someone who appreciates me."
I turned to walk into and rummage through his closet. I settled on wearing an oversized hoody and kept my leggings on. I stepped out of Eli's closet and turned to go to the washroom to change.
"Where are you going?" Eli called.
"To change."
"But you can change right here," Eli smirked, "Isn't that what good girlfriends do?"
I scoffed, "Firstly, we literally started dating today. Secondly, I'm not sure who taught you these incorrect mannerisms. Just because I'm dating you doesn't mean I'm going to become a stripper."
"Oh, my god, Buttercup, when this is all over you should totally beco-"
I shut the washroom door, rolling my eyes playfully. I was dating a total goofball.
I quickly changed before walking back out.
"Damn, Buttercup, you look undeniably hot. You should wear my outfits more often."
I turned my head away, trying not to blush.
I had been blushing a lot recently. What the hell was wrong with my face?
Eli got up off of his bed and made his way towards me, "Do I get that real kiss now? I just appreciated you."
"Mhm, no," I smirked, turning away from him.
He grabbed me by the waist and leaned in to kiss me. At the last moment, I turned away so that he was kissing my cheek.
"Freaking tease," he muttered.
I giggled before pecking his cheek and laying down on the bed.
"What are you doing, Buttercup?"
I grabbed Eli's phone from his nightstand taking a look at the time, "I'm taking a thirty-three-minute nap."
I hoped desperately that Riley and Dad's part of the plan was going well.
➸
Andrea looked me up and down, "Elijah, darling, why does the poor girl look more homeless than she did before? Her clothing is so baggy!"
I'm sorry I don't like wearing skin tight clothing. I enjoy breathing. Just a bit.
I had only just begun to fall asleep when Eli nudged me awake. He had used a flashlight to send a signal outside to where Dad and Riley were hopefully waiting.
We were sat in the dining hall. Eli was at one end of the table whilst I sat beside Andrea, parallel to Xavier.
"I'm sorry, Aunt Andrea, I just wanted to bring her down as quickly as I could so I grabbed the first thing I saw," Eli fibbed.
Andrea nodded grimly before turning back to me.
"Valerie, sweetheart, please call your dad and tell him to come here if he wants you to live."
Andrea passed me a disposable phone and gestured towards Xavier who pressed a blade against my neck.
Wow, how homely of them.
I wasn't sure how Dad had done it, but I dialled a number that was supposed to play a message automatically and I just prayed it would work.
"Put the phone on speaker, Valerie."
I obliged, "Hey Dad. Your psychotic lover, Andrea wants you to come to her mansion if you want me to live to see another day. Please help me."
Dad's voice recording played, "I'm on my way right now, Val. Hang in there. You're going to be safe."
Andrea hung up for me.
Thanks, psycho.
Xavier stepped back, allowing me to move without the fear of cutting my neck open.
Thanks, psycho's unloved husband.
Andrea sent me the fakest smile I had seen, even Barbie would be jealous, "So, about two hours before your father gets here, it's time for us to explain exactly what will happen if your father isn't here by the time twenty-four hours is up."
Andrea went on a rampage about how she was going to bomb the city and kill every person Dad and I have ever acquainted ourselves with and that she was going to torture Dad until he gave in. I had made a couple of snarky comments, resulting in a couple of slaps. My cheeks were burning.
I looked over at Eli, he was gritting his teeth and shaking his head in anger.
Xavier on the other hand sat beside Andrea looking at her with absolute adoration. It was pitiful.
"So, Andrea. When are you going to tell Xavier?" I smirked.
"Tell me what?" Xavier asked, turning towards me.
I shrugged nonchalantly, "Oh, just the real reason she wants my father."
"She wants his money," Xavier told me, rolling his eyes, "I told you before."
"No she wants your money. She wants my dad's-"
Andrea clenched her jaw, "-Don't make me drown you, again."
"Actually you never drowned me, poor Xavier had to do all your dirty work," I snapped, "Even after this is all over, you won't love him, you'll just keep him around to attend to you, isn't that right?"
Eli sent me a warning glare. He mouthed, Buttercup, stop riling her up.
The look Andrea was sending me told me she was ready to skin me. If she was a dragon, steam would be flaring from her nostrils. Before she got the chance to do or say anything though, there was a knock on the doors of the hall.
"Who the hell is it?" Andrea yelled.
A voice came from the other side of the door, "It's Reece, ma'am."
Andrea sighed, pulling at her perfect hair, "I'm not done with you, Valerie. Young girls like you, who talk back to their elders, deserve to be punished."
Yeah, and old women like you deserve to rot in hell along with your fellow demonic beings.
"Come in, Reece."
The doors were opened and Reece walked in. I remembered his face from the last time I had seen him. He looked like he was sick of working for Andrea. Poor guy. I'd probably have white hair if I had to deal with Andrea twenty-four seven.
"Excuse me for the interruption, Ms. Feverette," Reece apologized, "But, I came across these two snooping around in your room."
Almost like it was rehearsed, a group of people entered the hall.
Held at gunpoint by four other men behind Reece, were Dad and Riley.
Oh, flipping fudge.
This was so not going the way I had planned it to.
➸➸➸➸➸
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