“I’m here,” Jenny sang with a joyful voice as I picked up the letter and hurried down the stairs eager to get down to her. Honestly I just wanted to leave it behind and hurry into my safe bubble again; but reality couldn't be ignored when it was hammering on your door.
I pushed the front door open, while Jenny babbled on about Louis and Harry’s awful cooking skills and how we probably had to bring some pizzas and a fire extinguisher just incase. The cold wind drifted in over me and the utter darkness outside caught me by surprise; there were so many places to hide, I realized. So many corners in the shadows where someone could be standing and watching.
Jenny waved to me from the driver’s seat of Perrie’s little chili red Beetle whose engine was still running. The headlights shone out through the cold air and some tiny flickers of glitter were caught in the lights making me realize the tiniest snowflakes were falling from the cold sky. I hitched up in the bags and with my heart still pumping with fear, I rushed to get into the car. I could hear music playing in there even before I pulled the door open; as I did so the blast from the radio hit me like a wall of music and it managed to blow off any form for anxiety I’d just had a second ago, as the up beat Whitney Houston song echoed through the street. And yet not deepest down which left me with conflicting emotions.
“I wanna dance with somebody!” Jenny sang along as I threw my bags in the back seat and got in. I almost frantically pulled the door shut behind me. She laughed loudly, “80s hit mix. The guys will seriously never let me play it.”
She turned it down a notch so we could hear ourselves think while she send me a wide beam, “hey you!” Her hair was gathered in a high loose ponytail and it almost looked like she was glowing from happiness.
She leaned over and pulled me into a much needed hug, “how are you?”
Her eyes flickered over me as she had released me again and the Whitney Houston song played softly in the background. I tried to nod and smile, but couldn’t really handle it any longer, “not the best day to be honest.”
It must have been so evident because she shut off the radio completely and turned in her seat fully. A frown had found its way into her usually joyful features and she grabbed my hand, “hey - hey it’s going to be alright, love.” Her voice was soft and comforting, but I kept my gaze on the street outside not able to meet her caring eyes.
“You’re going to be fine - trust me if there’s anything I’m sure off; it’s that Harry would rip the head off the person who would ever try to -” I interrupted her gently; “that’s the thing, Jenny. I don’t want him to put himself into that position. He deserves to just be happy for Christ’s sake! Live his life, play with Little Nothings, see his friends - but instead he constantly has to watch his every fucking move and check up on me just because he’s worried as shit.”
“Listen - Amber. Harry is going to figure this out and you need to think of something else in the meantime. Okay? That’s how you can help him - by being the one who doesn’t freak out about this. It’ll pass quickly - I mean how crazy can that Peter guy be afterall?” I wasn’t sure how much Harry had told her about the situation so I just nodded and looked up at her only to see the absolute confidence over her words.
“Are you doing anything this weekend? Maybe we can make it into a long weekend with Perrie - no boyfriends for a few days - just us girls. We can probably be at Perrie’s from… Thursday?” She stated casually as she turned on the radio again; the Whitney Houston song had ended and a Wham! one was playing this time. She turned around and stepped on the speeder so the car started flying down the street with such force that I was thrown back into the seat, meanwhile I remembered how Peter had spoken of ‘Harry’s ticket for Thursday’.
“I don’t really know - I’m getting really far behind with the assignments for my course and -” Jenny looked briefly over at me, before she made an absolutely crazy turn around a corner. If I hadn’t been wearing a seatbelt I would have crashed into the side of the door.
“Yeah, well I think Perrie probably got some art stuff she needs to do as well - we can make it into a girls' study weekend then. No boys to disturb. I’ll cook for you guys and we can watch incredibly cheesy chick flicks, hear 80s and 70s mix without anyone saying it sounds like pink bubblegum, and just think about it - for entire four days we won’t have to be fucking annoyed every time the fucking toilet seat hasn’t been put down.”
Of course that was never a problem with Harry being the gentleman he was, but I was still surprised with the intense annoyance in her tone. I frowned my brows and looked over at her, “wait a moment - are you having something serious with anyone at the moment?” The way she had stated it had made me think this wasn’t just some usual 'attempt of convincing'. It almost seemed like Jenny needed this.
“What, me? Well not … really. But Louis has stayed over quite a lot which means Alex and Ed have been hanging out with us as well,” she shrugged, but I could easily see how her smile grew wider at the mentioning of Louis’ name.
“Oh this one is good -” she turned up the volume of the radio and sang along softly, “you come and go, you come and go.”
“Culture Club?” I asked and she nodded impressed before I continued, “my mum would always play this radio station. - so you and Louis?” I couldn’t stop smiling widely a tiny bit amused over this; the two most sassy people I had ever encountered being more than friends?
“Just chilling. Just hanging out -” she stated again as she suddenly stepped on the brake making me fly forward in the seat. I reminded myself that I had to tell Louis he was absolutely right about Jenny’s driving skills.
“Yeah, sure -” I laughed softly as the light turned green and in a matter of seconds the little Beetle flew over the slightly frozen and sparkling streets from the winter cold.
“Oh shut up already,” she laughed with me and rolled her eyes, as her cheeks turned the color of her hair, “so you in for that girls’ weekend or what? Frankly I won’t take no for an answer. We can totally bitch about how wonderfully annoying the male species is - come on you can’t possibly say no to that opportunity, eh? Besides Little Nothings can finally get an entire weekend to practice.”
I couldn’t stop chuckling, as I followed the blurry outside of the city lights mixing with the bypassers and darkness, “okay. I’ll think about it yeah?” I wanted to talk with Harry before occupying my entire weekend with a ‘no-boys-allowed’ event. Especially since this was the weekend his father would throw that event. I recalled how happy Harry had seemed when he was playing that time at practice; how he had been able to escape to some place, where not even I could follow him. Maybe that was the best way for him to get his mind of his father this weekend?
Jenny started cheering as Taylor Dayne’s ‘Tell It To My Heart’ started blasting in that scratty way from the vintage speakers of the old car.
“This is such an awful song - but it’s still just so fucking good, you know?” Jenny yelled over the singing and I couldn’t stop laughing. As we both joined in on the chorus; I had practically already forgotten about the letter in my pocket with my inked name written on the front; it was strange how the weight of an object could change so easily according to what you had on your mind.
We were halfway through Michael Jackson’s ‘The Way You Make Me Feel’ as we finally reached the familiar red brick building; my heart aching to be in Harry’s embrace again. I exhaled deeply as the longing almost was overpowering. To feel him close simply; to see how he would suppress that smile or bite his bottom lip. To have his fingertips play over my skin without thought to it.
Things were going to be alright; we just had to get through this weekend. Jenny drummed her hands on the steering wheel, while singing along for as long as we could before the 80s mix would be a 'no-fucking-way' zone with the boys around. I smiled widely and sang along at the top of my lungs with Jenny. Things were going to be alright. And Jenny had this amazing gift to make everything seem bearable and transmit her glee to everything around her. Today she was over the skies simply.
[harry’s pov]
“I’m telling you this is going to taste like shit whatever we do,” Louis giggled as he poured more of the vodka into whatever stew we were trying to make. I couldn’t help but laugh at the way he just casually threw random ingredients into the bubbly mess, as I tried making sure the rice didn’t burn.
I had desperately tried finding some things in the fridge that could work together and Louis had done the chopping, though it had more looked like he had tried to brutally murder the cutting board. I had told him this wasn’t fucking Fruit Ninja and in return he had stopped the chopping; turned to face me and stared with such an intense gaze of ‘shut the fuck up’ that I had muttered a half serious half stifled laughed ‘sorry’ back at him.
“Can’t we just order some pizzas or something?” He bemoaned with a defeated tone of voice. I had told him no right from the beginning - using money on take-away when we had food in the fridge wasn’t exactly what my budget could handle right now. I had tried making sure it would turn out decent; trying to recall what Aria would usually add in her cooking. Cooking was seriously exhausting; I had really tried my hardest with this.
I pushed him softly with my shoulder and he chuckled as I told him a, “oh come on it can’t be that bad!” I couldn’t afford it if we fucked this up.
I lifted the lid and the steam poured up from the pot; it was probably the vodka evaporating since it did so at a much lower temperature than this stew had anyway. It didn’t look too bad - Louis was definitely exaggerating. I had tried my very hardest with this and I had been very careful; making sure Louis only added the stuff I had put forth to him. I wasn’t sure why but I was just terribly nervous for the girls to return. Like if this stupid dinner wasn’t going to work out then nothing would. It was simply stupid, but it had completely taken me by surprise how easily Amber and I could be over if that was what she wanted. I didn’t want to make a mess of more things. Not even a damn stew.
Louis turned up the sound. With a yell over the music he had explained me how we were men and if we had to cook we at least had to listen to some real rock’n’roll music and that the dish should include some sort of strong alcohol.
I didn’t mind though, the Rolling Stones CD he had chosen helped drowning my annoying and edgy thoughts and as always when I listened to music new melodies were forming in my mind. Maybe I was tense too over my trip on Thursday - and definitely concerned about what would happen if Amber discovered I was trying to hide it from her.
“Will you set the table, Lou?” I asked Louis as I stirred in the boiling mix we had managed to create. I had tried aiming for some traditional ‘tomatoes, onions, green herbs, meat’ stew that hopefully wouldn’t turn into complete disaster.
“So Thursday huh - how do you feel buddy?” Louis asked casually as he grabbed four plates and leaned against the kitchen counter. I had just told them that I had to go visit my father; I couldn’t be sure but they had probably figured out there was some sort of connection between the trouble with Peter and my prick of a father. Or else they thought maybe my father could help me fix the problem with Peter.
I just shrugged as reply, “just have to get over with it.” We didn’t usually talk about these kind of things and it felt alien to tell Louis this, “so you really think it’s going to be okay with us cancelling that show on Friday? Maybe we can offer him two more numbers for free if we get to do it the week after?”
Louis caught onto my attempt of changing the subject and he waved me off, “yeah - yeah absolutely. No don’t worry about it; Richard owes me anyway so it’s no problem. But we need to step up our game you know - like I know you’ve needed to spend a lot of time with Amber and all, but - Styles - no more missing practice, eh? Bring her with you if you need to - I know it’s tough, but we miss you man! We still have those three new songs that we are nowhere near ready to play live.”
I nodded slowly chewing on the inside of my cheek as a frown suited my features. I watched as Louis grabbed four water glass and - of course - four shot glass. That boy would never miss an opportunity to drink Jenny under the table.
“Yeah - yeah of course man,” I turned my attention back to the stew as he continued, “I mean it’s great that you’re suddenly an unstoppable love song writing machine. I swear everytime I see you lately you tell me you have a new one - but we need to practice too, yeah? Give your breathtakingly beautiful muse a break, okay?” He chuckled and winked at me while his words almost made me drop the wooden spoon into the dish.
He disappeared out of the kitchen to set the table in the living room so we could watch a movie, while I tried agreeing with myself that practice was indeed very important. I just had to get this weekend over with and then everything would turn normal; I could concentrate on my job and band practice. And her. I wouldn’t have to constantly be on the edge as to whether she was okay whenever I wasn’t with her. Hopefully I wouldn’t keep on getting the nightmares of her getting hurt; of Peter doing horrible things against her just to get to me; of watching my father’s face through the glass door as the snow fell around me in the little yard that Christmas years back. while the tears froze to icy patterns down my cheeks.
I was completely lost in thoughts till the doorbell suddenly sounded and a low raspy ‘fuck’ escaped my lips, as I remembered the rice were still on the heat. Louis yelled ‘I got it’, while I frantically tried turning off the heat and checking the damage. It wasn’t too bad luckily. My heart was beating extremely fast in my chest almost like that first time I had kissed her or the time I had written ‘I love you’ to her, but this time a shadow of something crucial about to happen lingered in the corner of my heart with a teaspoon of fear too.
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a/n: you guys are really cute (▰˘◡˘▰)